A/N: well, i guess you guess you guys, have finally gotten tired of all the waiting, and my excusses so I will not give you any. I just want to tell you all that you have been a wonderful and reviewfully cool crowd. err readers. So thankx for checking out the story and I am glad you enjoyed it so much to giv me over 80 reviews. So thank you! Here is the final chapter 11, and I hope you have enjoyed this chapter. Also this is a little angsty.
Chapter 11 Changes aren't my favorite thing
Emma's POV
It's been a month since the party, a month since the shooting, and a month since I'd hooked up with Jay. Everything had changed, and I don't take to changes too well.
We still hung out, I guess, just not as much. We had all gone our separate ways, life stopped for the 5 of us, our chapter together had closed.
Sean had moved back to his hometown with his parents, after rumor has it, saw his mother crying on television.
Jay had started hanging at the Ravine, more then usual. I sometimes felt as if he couldn't be near me for some odd reason. We hadn't really talked since that night, maybe he'd let me in too much, or maybe he still felt guilty. I'm not sure, and I don't know if I'll ever REALLY know.
Alex and Craig had broken up, he found out that she, Spinner, and Jay had dumped the paint on Rick, she had started the train of event to get his best friend shot. No one but Craig and us knew that Alex and Jay were involved. Everyone just blamed Spinner, and he was kicked out of school.
Alex was depressed and in a very quiet way had dumped Ellie and me. She was now hanging out with Paige and co, more.
Ellie was just as depressed and I hate to say it, started cutting again, she's denying that she's started it again, but I know better.
Then as for me, well, I'm as depressed as Ellie and am trying to deal with the whole situation...by not eating. I guess it started off with me believing Jay was repulsed by me, that was the reason he was avoiding me. But then it turned into an obsession, I am anorexic.
I'm not sure if things will ever be the same, I hope so. I hope Jay and me will get back together, since the last time I was really truly happy was when I was with him, and I hope Sean comes back for Ellie. I also hope Alex and Craig will get back together, since they are both as depressed as ever. But I doubt it, I doubt all of it.
"Hey."
I looked up to see Ellie, she had on a plaster-on-smile. I gave her the same smile, we were both obviously in pain, but were too stubborn to tell the other.
"How are you?" I asked.
It was last period and we were getting ready to go home. I already knew her answer before she even said it, fine. We were both 'fine.'
"Fine." she answered with the same smile. "You?"
"Fine."
We walked out the door together, and as we walked down the steps of Degrassi, I heard my name being called.
"Emma! Emma! Wait!"
I turned around and imagine my surprise when I saw Jay running towards me.
"Yeah?" I asked trying to ignore the attraction between us.
"Um, I um, have to talk to you." I shrugged and looked at Ellie, she shrugged back.
"Ok." I said.
"Well, I want to start with I'm sorry."
"Jay you told me this...when you were drunk."
"Yeah I know, but see, I did a really bad thing."
I raised an eyebrow, Jay had done a ton of bad things what's so different about this one? One he wanted to tell me himself?
"I did that thing to Rick." He said shrugging.
"Yeah, I know."
"Who told you?"
"No one, Jay, I'm not stupid!"
"I never said you were."
"Why—"
"Just let me finish!"
I rolled my eyes but went quiet anyway.
"I wouldn't hang out with him, girls, he's spreading gonorrhea to the whole school!" some girl said, then walked away, laughing.
I looked at Jay, and felt...something that I can't really name, all I know was it was a BAD feeling.
"How did you get gonorrhea?" I asked quietly.
He shrugged, but I knew he was lying, he always lied to me, not to hurt me, I guess, but he eventually did just that.
I found out the next day how he got it. From Amy, and he'd slept with a bunch of different girls so there was an outbreak at the school. I, myself, went to a clinic just to make sure. It hurt knowing he did all that, when in my mind we were still semi-together. We hadn't OFFICIALLY broke up, we never had that talk, we just drifted.
So as I sit here as depressed as ever, either dying from starvation, or dying from heartbreak, I don't know which. I just want to say, I loved Jay, and probably still do. But how can I forgive him? After all he's done, and put me through, how can I ever forgive him?
Man, if I ever get off this bed I'm getting help.
(A/N: well, I hope you enjoyed and I'm sorry if this was a bad ending or too sad or whatever. But I hope you liked the whole thing anyway. Thanks for reading! and I'm sorry the ending was so incredible short!)