Thanks to ang for betaing.

It was a pretty strange sight. A large building that had one chamber. No writing on the walls, no chairs, nothing. John Sheppard was really bored. Rodney, on the other hand, was pretty enthusiastic.

"This is fascinating!" Rodney said, for the hundredth time.

"What is, Rodney?" John was looking around without seeing anything interesting. He wished he could join Ronon and Teyla a few miles down the road, by the river.

"This place! It wasn't built by the Ancients, but there is an energy signature similar to that of the Ancient outposts."

"So..."

"So? That's all you can say? Colonel, isn't there anything except guns that -"

"Oh, look! A button!"

"That sounded really dumb. I should have expected something like... What are you doing?"

Rodney went over to the corner of the room, where Sheppard was staring at a small round stone.

"That wasn't there before. I should... don't touch that!"

"What could possibly happen?"

"Well... we could die, for starters. I'll get my scanner and we'll see -"

John decided that moment that the best thing to do was to press the little stone.

A few seconds later they both landed on a hard, stone floor.

"I told you not to press that! Why can't you ever listen?"

"That's really interesting."

"Really? How so?"

"Coming from you and all..."

"Very funny, Colonel. Look what you got us into."

"For all you know, you could've stepped on something on the way to your scanner."

Rodney was looking around the room they were in. The small room, actually. It was two by two meters and the ceiling was quite high. Rodney couldn't feel the ceiling, and there was no chance of him seeing anything, because the room was pitch black.

"Colonel, we should see if there aren't any similar buttons on the walls."

"Well, you SEE and I'll -"

"Will you stop this? It's not my fault!"

"You got me so bored -"

"You're not a bloody child!"

"Starting to talk like Carson, are you?"

"Just shut up and move along the walls, try to FEEL for any buttons and don't push anything."

They started their explorations and found nothing. The walls were made of little bricks, none different from the other.

"What about the ceiling?" Sheppard sounded amused.

"Is this funny, Colonel?"

"Was just imagining how we must look."

"If we don't get out of here, that's all we'll be doing. Ever."

"Now, McKay, calm down. We're not going to die. Teyla and -"

"Have you lost your mind? Those two couldn't find -"

"Hey! They know more about survival than you ever will."

"Yes, well, it's not them who have to survive. Us on the other hand... What did you want to say about the ceiling?"

"I can't feel it."

"I think you can imagine neither can I."

"There'd be no point for it to be too tall. It would be a waste of space. It should be just out of our reach." John didn't want Rodney's panic to transfer to him. He was actually happy Rodney was holding off pretty well.

"You're right, John. Maybe if we... "

"Any button would be close to the walls. It's the only way we can reach the ceiling, by leaning against the walls and jumping."

"It's worth a try."

They both leaned against the wall, on opposite sides of the room, and jumped to touch the ceiling. The second they touched it, they heard a loud screech and the sound of stone moving on stone.

"Are you okay, Rodney?"

"Yeah. I have no idea what happened. Are you okay? You sound strange."

"Well, so do you."

The next thing Rodney heard was a thud.

"What was that?"

"I hit a wall! How dumb is that?"

"Just turn around and come here."

Another thud.

"This is absurd! Can't you find your way around a two by two room?"

"Rodney, it's not two by two anymore. There are two rooms..."

"Oh my God! The room was divided in two!"

"Not quite! I mean, not only! Mine is one meter by half a meter."

"So is mine!"

Rodney was panicking. He tried not to, he really tried, but he was claustrophobic, and the thought he was stuck in a small room didn't help. He supposed he was lucky it was dark and he couldn't see the room.

"Well, that went wrong."

"Awfully wrong, John." Rodney sounded resigned.

"I'm really sorry. We did what we could -"

"Wrong. We did everything wrong."

"Yeah. Exactly. Could it be any worse?"

"I don't even want to think about it."

"Come on! This wall can't be that big! Let's try to see if we can -"

"If it collapses, we could be crushed by the ceiling!"

"Just a hole, Rodney. For one of us to get to the other side."

"And how do you suggest we do that?"

"You go to the corner of the room, and I'll try to move some bricks."

"How? They are pretty -"

A loud thud interrupted Rodney's words.

"Really clever."

Two more thuds and silence.

"Well? Are you okay?"

"Just... a... bit... tired."

"You did throw yourself against a wall."

"Know what, Rodney? You think of something and I'll -"

"Shut up!"

"What? You can't tell me to -"

"Stop talking!"

They heard another stone moving sound and then a different, strange sound.

"What was that?" Panic was showing in Rodney's voice.

"Don't freak out, Rodney!"

"Have you lost your mind? Everything we did turned bad. How can we know what happened this time?"

"I have an idea."

"What?"

"Water. Water is pouring in from a hole in the wall."

"We're gonna drown!"

"It's a long way till drowning!"

After what felt like forever, the water stopped pouring. It was up to Sheppard's chin and he was sure Rodney was more uncomfortable than he was.

"What now, Rodney?"

"Now? Now nothing! We have to wait for those two superheroes to come rescue us!"

"Rodney! They're part of the team and they're your friends. How can you -"

"You know what? I'm sick of this."

"Sick of what?"

"Being in situations that I'm expected to solve. Can't I just have some peaceful days... just a few?"

"When you're not off world, you're in your office, blowing something up!"

"There have only been two explosions in the science lab, none of them my fault! And yes, Colonel, you're right. This is sooooo much better. Can't wait to tell everyone about it."

"Well, it's not my fault that -"

He was interrupted by a muffled sound. Then the well-known sound of stone moving. The ceiling was coming down on them.

"What do we do now, Colonel?"

"What can we do?"

Panic filled their voices. They were about to be either crushed by the ceiling or drowned.

The ceiling stopped moving five inches above the water. Then, water started pouring again and the floor started moving.

"What's it doing? Rodney, what's happening?"

"It's... sinking. The floor is going down."

"Why?"

In any other circumstances, Rodney would've mocked Sheppard. But this was the question he had asked himself for the past three hours. Ever since they had landed in this chamber.

"I don't know... maybe it will... I have no idea!"

"Rodney, can you swim?"

"Yes, of course. Why?"

"That's what it wants us to do."

"What? Who?"

Then he realized. The floor was getting lower, and water kept pouring to ensure that the air in the chamber was the same as before. They had five inches of air and no floor to put their feet on.

"Why would someone make such a thing? What is this place?" Rodney was desperate. He wasn't sure he could swim long enough, before the next change took place. He wasn't sure he wanted another change. It could only be worse.

"Just shut up, Rodney! You'll run out of oxygen."

"You're right!"

"Glad you agree -"

"No, we should have run out of oxygen!"

"Are you complaining?"

"This isn't meant to kill us!"

"Then what? See if we can swim? A bit extreme, don't you think?"

"Remember those movies they showed about training conditions for military personnel?"

"I am military personnel, you daft."

"Who's talking like Carson now?"

"Hey, I -"

"That's not the point. Maybe this is something similar."

"So? When's it gonna end?"

"You should know."

"I was never the coordinator. How should I know what's next?"

Silence set between them. John remembered how his training days went. How many times he thought he was going to quit. But his love for flying kept him going. Funny how he remembered that now, trapped, submerged, a few feet underground.

"That's it!"

"Sheesh, Rodney, almost gave me a heart attack!"

"Well, sorry."

"Figured out when this will end?"

"Yeah."

"Well... do share."

"Never."

"What?" John tried not to choke.

"See... everything else was automated. This can't be. There must be someone at the controls, to let the subjects out."

"So?"

"There weren't any life signs on the planet. We're the only living souls around here."

"So... never."

"Yup."

About an hour later, tired of hearing Rodney's sighs, and a bit afraid he might start complaining himself, John asked Rodney:

"Shouldn't there be some fail-safe mechanisms?"

"This isn't the Ancients we're talking about, John. This civilization was kinda primitive."

"Kinda? Well, there must be a way. Think about how we started all this."

"Already have."

"Of course you did."

"Well, as strange as it seems, you were right. You didn't set it off. It was set off some time after we walked in the chamber."

"So the button..."

"I have no idea."

"Now that's a surprise..."

"Yeah..."

It was really unnerving. Not only was he swimming in cold water, in a dark room, unable to think of a solution, but Sheppard was mocking him, and he couldn't respond.

"Rodney, when you said primitive, what did you mean?"

"Well, look around you... it's all so..."

"Mechanical."

"Yes, Colonel, good observation. Did it take you long to notice that?"

"Wait a second, Mister Astrophysicist. If it's mechanical, it must have some devices controlling it."

"Of course it does. What are you trying to suggest?"

"That we're not like this just so we had to swim... it's a way of masking the mechanisms."

"Hide them where?"

"Below us."

"So?"

"Let's go have a look."

"I'll pack the picnic basket and we'll go! Are you crazy! How are we to know where we are... And if we do find something, what if we don't find it the second time?"

"Just calm down, Rodney. I'll go see... feel for anything unusual."

After a few seconds, John emerged: "Yes! Told you! It's some sort of lever."

"You're not thinking of pulling it, are you?"

"Already have!"

"We're doomed."

"We were already doomed, McKay!"