Disclaimer: This is just fanfiction. Nobody gets paid for it, and nobody is stealing anything from the Naruto franchise. For me, this is just fun: don't spoil it by suing me.
Author's note: Some of the reviews for the last chapter said it was too short: I took that as a challenge. Here's the longest chapter I've written yet. Too long? Too detailed? Boring? Please, don't shy away from being honest! Read and review! All comments welcome! Oh, and the next updates probably gonna be three weeks away this time. Things look really tight for my schedule over the next few weeks.
Tenth Move
It was morning in Konoha, and in the Nara household, a quiet, deliberate ceremony was taking place. And it was an important ceremony indeed, for this ceremony symbolized the beginning of the new day, and the shedding and systematic removal of the vestiges and detritus and stench that a night of fitful sleep and restless dreams brought to any man.
The fact that they drooled in their sleep didn't help much, either. And their rooms were very musty, but how could that be helped? They didn't clean them, and Shikamaru's mom refused to lift a finger to clean them up, a sign of protest against the way she was being taken for granted. So that was that. They slept, coccooned in musty sheets and stale air, one refusing to subjugate herself to the others, while the others simply chose to ignore the hot, stinky elephant in their respective rooms.
But the equilibrium would shift soon. Inevitably, right would prevail, and Shikamaru and his father would be replacing sheets and scrubbing walls. For now, all parties simply held their breaths--less in anticipation, but more in an effort to not let the bad air in.
The younger of the two brushed his teeth, frenziedly stroking up and down, in and out, his mouth lathering up heavily. Placed randomly on top of the bathroom counter were dental floss, mouthwash, facial scrub, cotton buds, and cologne. Hygiene was not normally a big issue with him, but he was getting ready for big changes. For one thing, he was now the official guide to the Ambassador of Sunna. One wouldn't want to be slovenly, especially not him. At least, not in front of her.
The older man had some lather of his own, but this was from the foaming, mentholated shaving cream that he spread liberally all over his face. His eyes were narrowed, fiercely concentrated on the task at hand. His blade was poised, the basin filled almost to the brim with hot water. He grunted in irritation as the mirror fogged up again; he wiped it briskly with a handtowel.
They spoke, neither one looking at the other, each one absorbed in his own grooming. Mint filled Shikamaru's mouth, and the bathroom air had a hint of menthol. There was also a smell of alcohol from the older man, an artifact from the previous night's activities. Shikamaru had long ago learned to tolerate his father's habit. Anyway, it hasn't affected his health adversely, even after years of bingeing in good times and bad times and most of the times in between. His liver must be made of steel.
The older man broke the silence. "You're brushing a little hard, don't you think? You've been scrubbing for more than three minutes now."
Shikamaru scrubbed some more, then spat. "Got to get all the crud out."
"Why? Afraid your girlfriend will get turned off?" He inquired innocently, as hot steel met rough skin. It made a sound like a kunai scraping against pumice, which gave the man immense satisfaction.
"Dagh, pleashe." He took the mouthwash, gargled and spat. "Anyway, who're you to talk? You're just shaving because mom's been nagging you about it for weeks."
He flicked the razor, making the foam-scum splatter into the basin, where it dissolved like a lump of tofu in a bowl of clear miso soup."Come on, boy, you know she doesn't nag. It's just that she hates it when I don't. She likes it better when she's able to kiss me without getting a bad case of razorlip. And my day isn't complete without a smack from your mother."
"Oh, she smacks you, all right," Shikamaru said under his breath.
"Don't mumble, boy. It's not polite." Shikaku rubbed his chin contemplatively, making sure that everything turned out smoothly. "By the way, how did it turn out yesterday?" he asked cheerfully as he examined himself in the mirror. "Inoichi tells me that you passed by their flower shop yesterday morning. Did the advice Ino gave you work out?"
Shikamaru started rubbing the soap in his hands, a slippery bar with a distinctly antiseptic and neat scent. This was a man's soap--no pleasing fragrances from mysterious essential oils, no moisturizing or conditioning additives, no milk or honey. Just a good, basic cleaning agent. Very straightforward, which Shikamaru liked very much.
"Well, she did give me advice," he admitted, after rinsing and repeating. "But I wasn't able to follow through on it."
"What do you mean?" the father asked, affecting nonchalant interest. Having finished with his shaving, he dumped the fruits of his labor into the sink. "She's a woman, so her advice on romance should be gold."
Shikamaru proceeded to tell him about the events of the previous day. The blue rose, and the fiasco at the inn, and the near-disaster at Ebi's Eatery... all of it. Shikaku shook his head and smiled knowingly. Ah, young people in love, he said to himself. They never know how not to screw it up, or how to laugh when they do.
"Well, don't worry about it, Shikamaru. Time will come that you'll look back at all this and laugh."
"Sure hope that day comes soon. It was pretty embarrassing."
Shikaku laughed heartily at this as he set the basin aside. He didn't have the heart to bring up the current state of Inoichi's flower shop, or the deal they had struck the night before. Didn't matter, though. Chances are the boy would find out soon anyway.
"Oh come on, son, lighten up. You're still young, you've got your whole life ahead of you. If you can't laugh at this in three weeks time, then I can guarantee that you will forget all about it. What with all the other crap that's going to be coming your way."
"Thanks, dad. Talking to you always makes me feel better."
"Anytime, son."
Later that morning, Shikamaru picked up his authorization letter from Tsunade's. Matsuri handed him the scrolls. Her expression wasn't as antagonistic as it was yesterday, but it wasn't a friendly look either. Those who were well-versed in the nuances of politics would immediately recognize it: it said "here you go, kid, but next time, you'd better be careful what you wish for."
Shikamaru, whose entire existence had up to now practically revolved around his friends, the ninja academy, and cloudwatching, failed to recognize the irony. He clutched the scroll tightly as he walked down the street, a look of proud determination on his face. And it made perfect sense, because he was the type of person who honored commitments.
His arrangement with Tsunade was a commitment. It was written down now, on a piece of paper for everyone to see, which gave him a certain sense of pride. There was something so satisfying about that scroll. It was a contract, a bond between two individuals. The contract specified the scope of his authority and the details of his duties. It was clear that he had just been given a responsibility, which was bad for the sloth-weasel inside him, but with responsibility came trust, which was good for the boy who was just old enough to want to be old enough.
Besides, he thought as the scroll bounced lightly in his palm, this scroll gives me the weight I need.
And it was true. For the past twenty-four hours, his stomach had been in knots. Ever since he had told her that lie, he felt like he was wearing an ill-fitting skin. He felt really badly about lies and misdirection, especially when it was direct and done face-to-face. Now that he had the scroll, the lie had become the truth.
Looking closely at it, he observed that it was written on transcriptive parchment. He had heard about this, often in the context of bureaucracy and clerical work. But he knew other things about it, from rumors and stories from friends of friends of friends. Some say--it didn't really matter who--that it was developed in the Sound Village. Essentially, this kind of paper collects sound waves and automatically converts phonic syllables into written words. There are different scrolls for different languages and dialects, and even more specialized scrolls can only be used by certain people, and will only reveal what's written when a certain password is spoken by a certain person. Voice recognition, they called it.
Everyone knew that the ANBU have made several covert missions into other villages, and have brought back several technologies. But the general consensus was that these special scrolls did not exist. The common kind, which was very convenient for making long letters, was a homegrown product of Konoha, and was not a product of espionage and reverse engineering. That was the official story, and it was an everyday fixture in the Konoha government nowadays. But even though it was mundane to most, getting this kind of paper was, for him, better than being a Chuunin. It even had Tsunade's seal on it.
And there was an envelope as well. "For the Ambassador of Sunna", it said, "to be delivered without delay". Well, looks like this is his first assignment.
"Hey Shikamaru! What's that?"
He turned, hiding the envelope in his jacket as he did so. Ino ran down the early-morning sunlit street behind him.
That's odd. She's supposed to be at the shop. "This scroll? Nothing, really. Just something I picked up from the Fifth's."
"What would Tsunade want with you?"
Shikamaru smiled smugly. "You want to know? Really?"
She slowed down as she caught up with him. "Of course I do, you jerk! That's a message from the Fifth Hokage! Why wouldn't I want to know?" And why's he so happy?
He tapped the scroll knowingly on the side of his head. "Well, I'm not sure if I should tell you. It's official state business, you know."
Her eyebrows jumped in surprise. "What, you mean you're a government lackey now? I bet that scroll's not even yours. I bet you're just the new mailman, and you've got to bring that to the next village."
"Nah, I'm a bit more important than that."
"Just tell me already, you dork! You don't have to be so cocky about it!"
"Well, if you must know, I'm the official guide to the ambassador of Sunna."
Her eyes brightened at this. "Wow!"
"Impressive, huh?"
"No, just really pathetic! You're a tour guide!" She laughed so hard that she gasped and clutched at her stomach.
"Hey, you may mock, but this is a position of trust. Look here," he says, yanking the scroll open. "I am to be the official liaison between Konoha local authorities and the ambassador of Sunna. In addition, I am to be a witness to all proceedings between the ambassador and local authority figures, as well as report the events during said proceedings to Tsunade herself. Furthermore, I am to render any additional services that the ambassador might feel she needs during her stay here."
Ino craned her neck and read along, and nodded politely. Liaison to a liaison, huh? Sounds pretty redundant to me. And he's just gonna watch the meetings so Tsunade knows what's going on? She stopped reading, and peered closely at the parchment. Her eyes widened as she realized what he had just read aloud. "Wait a minute. 'Her'?"
"Yes, her. As in Temari the fan ninja."
So she's the ambassador. Gears turned and wheels spun in her mind as she started thinking. Suddenly, she started to get inklings of what "additional services" could possibly mean; at that point, the gears ground to a halt and wheels screeched as she abruptly stopped that train of thought. Yech. What are you thinking, Ino?
"But that's obviously not what you wanted me for," Shikamaru remarked. "Why'd you run after me anyway? Is there anything you need?"
Ino collects herself, and tells him to air out his hakama and kimono. "I know how rarely you use it. It must smell very musty after being kept in his closet for so long. Make sure it's ready by Saturday."
Shikamaru looked at her quizzically. "What would I need my kimono for?"
She rested a hand on his shoulder, and fluttered her eyelashes coquettishly. "That's for our double date."
Shikamaru recoiled away from her. "A double-date!?"
"It was the only way I could convince Sakura to go out with Naruto." Ino kept her eyes fixed on him, with an expression of accusation, and the posture to match.
"Yeah, but couldn't you have found some other guy to go with you? You and Sakura are close friends, but Naruto and I just see each other around. Not that I really hate the guy or anything..." Besides, I don't want to be around him for too long.
Her hands were on her waist, and she tapped one foot in irritation. "Look, what did you expect to happen? I'm still cleaning up after all those damned shadow clones rampaged through the shop. My dad's furious."
"Sorry, I forgot how troublesome Naruto could be." Him and his big mouth. "I'll stop by this afternoon if you want," he volunteered.
"Don't bother, it's just some last-minute stuff, like making sure there's no broken glass left for customers to hurt themselves on."
"Nobody walks barefoot in your flower shop," he retorted. "Anyway, why didn't you get Naruto and his stupid clones to help?"
"Are you seriously suggesting that I wanted them back in our shop?"
Shikamaru stopped. Oh yeah. Right. "No, but they could've helped anyway," he replied.
Ino let out an exaggerated sigh. "They've helped enough, thanks. Look, just get your hakama ready. You can pick me up at ten-thirty, and we'll meet Naruto and Sakura there."
Shikamaru, not wanting to exhaust himself so early in the day, resorted to his default You-Win-I-Give-Up tactic. "Sure, sure. If I go on this double-date, will you let me off the hook about the rose?" Wonder if it's still there. I hope to hell that the old lady didn't throw it away.
"Are you kidding? This is something else entirely. You didn't have to send Naruto to me, but you did. Sooooo," she sang, trotting in front of him. "now you're duty-bound to join me."
"Tch."
She walked backward, so they remained face to face. "Of course, you could tell me who your girlfriend is..."
"Not gonna happen."
"Don't pout. It'll be fun. Anyway, you ask me for advice on how to treat girls romantically, so this is a chance for you to test the water."
He frowned and looked up, as if he were imploring the gods to give him strength. Yeah, the old sink-or-swim. People are so lazy about education nowadays. Anyway, at least I'm not going out with her yet. It's just going to be Naruto and Ino and--
Oh gods. If they talk about me behind my back, they might just put it together...
"What the hell. Guess I'll really have to go. I just hope the old man is willing to give me some cash on such short notice. I can barely pay for my own meals, let alone treat you to this wonderful dinner."
"It's a lunch date, but you don't have to worry. Your dad's already agreed to take care of it."
That threw him off. "What, my dad? When did he say that?"
"Well, apparently, my dad told him what happened to our shop. Your dad felt pretty bad about it, so he's agreed to pay for our lunch date."
He walked on with well-practiced nonchalance. His dad was playing a tune again, and just like yesterday Ino was dancing to it. Here he goes again. And I thought he wanted me to go after Temari. What is he thinking? And why didn't he mention it this morning? More questions came, but he decided to address them later. "What's our lunch date got to do with your shop?"
Ino shrugged. "Who knows? I'm just happy that we can afford to go someplace decent for a change."
"Mind telling me where that is?"
"Yaminogakura," she intoned proudly. "You know, that Japanese grill in the middle of the commercial district? Since we're going in the daytime, the crowd's not going to be so bad, and we won't be bothering anybody. It's not too fancy, but we still need to dress nice, otherwise we won't get in at all. I've already made the reservation. 'Yamanaka, party of four?' Oh, it's going to be so great to hear that! I feel like a VIP!"
He looked dumbfounded as she preened, giggled, and sashayed, the ultimate display in mock elegance. Seeing Ino try to act like the upper crust was as unnerving as seeing a flying monkey. He gaped for a bit, but collected himself. "Yeah, yeah. By the way, thanks for asking me before making the reservation."
She stopped and smiled. "Sure, no problem. And thanks for asking before telling Naruto to ask me for help with Sakura." Here eyes glinted like teeth, telling him all he needed to know about what would happen if he didn't shut up. "Anyway, got to go. Still cleaning up the shop. Just wanted to make sure you were ready for our date." She beamed at him, and ran off. "And you'd better buy me really nice flowers, Shika!"
"Yeah, yeah," he yelled back, and cursed his twice-damned luck. He didn't even know any flower shops aside from Ino's.
Shikamaru made his way to the inn, and was mildly surprised to find Temari waiting in front. She told him that she'd been there for half an hour; she didn't feel like getting her head hurt again that day, and decided to wait for him in the street, where there would be witnesses to rush to her aid if anything happened.
He hands her the envelope, and she read it aloud as they strolled down the street. The message was a request from the Hyuuga clan, who wished to extend an amicable hand to the ambassador of Sunna. Temari has been asked to meet with Hinata, the daughter of the head clan; the ambassador's official guide was also invited.
"So are we going?"
Temari shrugged. "I'm not really sure yet."
Shikamaru was surprised. "Not the answer I was expecting."
"What are you talking about?"
"Real diplomats would jump at this opportunity. What happened to making a good impression?"
Temari waved her hands incredulously."Come on! I've seen what those guys are like. They don't care about me or my country, they just want to look good. Why should I care what they think?"
"Yeah you're probably right," Shikamaru conceded. "The Hyuugas have always been all about name and reputation, as if they were specially favored or something. Of course they are, in a way, but that doesn't make it right for them to rub it in people's faces all the time."
It wasn't that he really felt that from the Hyuugas personally. He just saw the way they treated people like Naruto, who didn't have any family, or Sasuke, whose brother killed his family and disgraced the name.
That was the ugly thing about having a name like Hyuuga or Uchiha. The name's no longer something that represents you. The situation gets turned around, and the name becomes something that you represent. You live up to it, or you disgrace it. That's why he was glad to be a Nara. It was an ordinary name that nobody expected anything from.
Temari snorted out her contempt, pulling him back into the real world. "Did you listen to the letter? I don't think they have any idea why I'm here in the first place!" She grinned evilly. "You know what? Let's accept their offer, but give the Hyuuga's brat the silent treatment. See how she likes being ignored."
"Hey, come on. The Hyuugas are assholes as a whole," he said, "but Hinata's nice. We went through the ninja academy together, so I know she's cool. In fact, she's the most likeable one of the bunch. That's probably why she's going to be their representative."
"Or since she's just a little girl, she has the least importance in the clan. I bet they don't think we're important, really, but decided that they still had to make an impression."
"Maybe. But you shouldn't take that as a license to treat Hinata like crap. Anyway, just because you're an ambassador doesn't mean all your actions are excusable."
She raised her hands in a conciliatory fashion. "All right, all right. Sheesh, bite my head off." A thought came to her. "Hey, why are you defending her so much?"
"Huh?"
"Oh, I get it," she squealed delightedly. "How very precious!"
"Shut up."
She patted him on the shoulder. "No, I really think it's cute! And it's perfect! She's nice and rich. Get in her family and you've got it made! That's probably the only reason you took this job."
He shook the hand off. "Look, you don't know what you're talking about. I'm doing this because Tsunade told me to. As for Hinata, she's a sweet kid, but I don't like her like that. Besides, she's already got someone she likes."
She derived a great deal of pleasure from his reaction; there was something really fun about getting under his skin. She also noted of the phrase "sweet kid". That's a laugh. "Oh really? Who?"
"Why is this so interesting to you?"
"Because it is! Come on. Tell me who!"
"I'd rather not, thanks. Not my place to say." Yeah. Would be pretty hypocritical of me to expect other people to respect my secrets if I didn't respect theirs.
"Ooookay."
"Not as if it's that big a secret. You'll figure it out. It's plain as daylight."
"So why don't you tell me anyway?"
"Because I don't have to. I thought I'd made my point."
"What point?"
"A man doesn't do anything unless it's absolutely necessary."
"You really are lazy."
"I'm not lazy, you're just bossy. So are we granting their request?"
"Sure, why not? It's nice to meet new people. I'd hate to have to be stuck with your face the whole time I'm here."
"It's such an honor being at your service."
"Don't you forget that, shadowboy."
They would be going to Hoshisen on Sunday. Apparently, the Hyuugas had already made arrangements, as if Temari refusing her offer would be inconceivable. Thankfully, it didn't overlap with Shikamaru's double-date with Ino, but two consecutive days of eating out with women was going to be troublesome.
It was a restaurant that had rooms, and bonsai trees, and a Zen garden. The bathrooms, it was said, were magnificent, and the toilets were clean enough to eat ramen from--not that anyone had been brave enough to try. It was also the kind of eating place with no kitchen in sight, and the staff remained unseen unless they asked what you wanted, brought the food you wanted, and collected the money you paid. Sliding doors gave privacy, as long as the people within did not shout, and spoke in hushed tones.
"I hope they allow kids in, though. Unaccompanied, I mean," Shikamaru thought aloud. "Even though we're pretty much all VIPs, we're still pretty young."
She scoffed condescendingly. "Speak for yourself. I saw people get killed long before you were an itch in your father's pants."
"..."
"What?"
"You know that was creepy, right?"
She cocked her head at him. "Really? I thought it was pretty funny."
"Then Gaara must be frigging hilarious," he replied, scratching his head.