Author's note: I own nothing here. I sure had fun writing this, though.
I Have Fury!
To you I say 'Welcome!' in this poem you are seeing
Perhaps you have the wondering of the things done by my being
The long tale makes babies grow old, and makes mustaches long and furry
So have listening to Fawful, to why I HAVE FURY!
In this beginning of beginnings, I am saying much and mucher
Of the language that is English, of which I am the masterful butcher
I take the boring meat that is the words that make people yawn
And I mix them into a fancy jumbled sentence of filet mignon!
Such is the word order that my brain has the reasoning
Filling the sausage of language with Fawful-brand seasoning
The confusingness of my words makes English teachers scurry
But the possession that is of mine that I treasure most is my FURY!
The greatness that is of my mind is not being beat
Except for the Great Cackletta, when I was serving at her feet
Her title was the Great, and was given by I, Fawful, her fan
For she thought up the evilness that was the sandwich of her plan
The sandwich that would be making all Beanbean bow down on their knees!
The Beanstar the meat, Peach's voice the bread, and the Peach-bots the cheese!
But the part Cackletta had the giving to me was for me to weather,
For I was the Toothpick of Importance for the holding of the plan together
But we had the overlooking of our one single worry,
The stupidness that is the Mario Bros, which give me such FURY!
On the day of the thieving of the voice of the bread
I with the Great Cackletta had the rushing back with happiness in my head
That was until the arriving of the ship that was the Koopa Kruiser
That had transporting of the Bros that wanted Fawful to being the loser!
It was the timing for the mustard of our sandwich that was the battle
But oh, the painfulness of the jumping had the making of my head rattle!
Just when the Mario Bros had thinking that my end was near,
I with my rage had the calling forth of my headgear
And downed the ship in one fell swoop of an energy ball flurry
But those Mario Bros had survival, which made me HAVE FURY!
At the time of later, at the Hoohoo Village,
I and Cackletta had the doing of pillage
But the Prince that was Peasley had coming like a fast rolling keg
So Cackletta had the using of magicalness to seal him in an egg
While I, Fawful, blocked the Bros advancing with the blocking of a stone,
Then with the swiftness of horseradish to the castle I had flown
While Cackletta had the job of the castle town wrecking
I fed Queen Bean the Worm of Belly Bleching
And best of all, when knowledge had acquired that the Mario Bros had coming
The Cackletta of Greatness had the trickery for their fixing of the plumbing!
Such was how the gathering of the meat of the plan was done,
So we had haste to Woohoo Hooniversity, our sesame-seed bun
In which the setting up of our plan was to have the completing,
But those fink-rats who I hate had coming to give us a beating!
The Great Cackletta fought bravely with the spiciness of curry,
But the Bros gave her the defeat, and gave me MORE FURY!
To have the saving of the master that I had the holding so dear
I had the suction of her energy into my headgear
But those horrible Bros had giving us the boot of painfulness
So for a while I had looking for a new body for Cackletta to possess
I had the finding of the Koopa the was the Bowser
I had pouring her energy into the body and wowser!
The birth of the creature called Bowletta was seen
And she had the immediate new plan for the conquering of Beanbean!
First she had collection of Bowser's things so her power had increases
Then she had the forcing of the Mario Bros to bring her the Beanstar pieces
But those Bros had smartness to foil our new plan
Our new sandwich had been stolen by a cross-dressing man
With the name of Luigi; he had taking the Beanstar back
Almost all hope we had losing for the world to be our tasty snack
Such afterthought I had lacking like the dirty glasses that are blurry
But we had one more plan to show them our FURY!
For this last plan formed by Bowletta with the mind so fantastic
She had taking of steps that had fullness of the drastic
With the Castle of the Bowser high above with looking down
We had such fury that we had wanting to destroy the whole town!
But those loathsome Bros once again had the following
We had to be making sure that their visit had the hardness of swallowing
Like the week-old batch of tasteless buns,
So we had sending them Bowser's daughter and sons
While in the solitude I had the creation of machine and suit
That had the sureness of giving those Bros the boot!
With shortness for the avoiding of the humility, I had the defeating
But only because the Fawful machine kept having the overheating!
With the greatness of a hammer swing they knocked out this poetaster
I had learning later of the loss of my beloved master
She had receiving her death sentence and those Bros were the jury
I had such of the grieving there was no time for the fury …
Now I have the commerce of a little badge shop
Where the badges have greatness that make all jaws drop
I have the missing of the days that I had the being of feared
Instead of being the calling of the bean man that is weird
But I am waiting like an elevator; I have no need for the hurry
For I have knowing that one day, once more, I! WILL! HAVE! FURY!