Summary: Lizzie has realized too late about her feelings for Gordo… Gordo is trying to forget about her, so he has got a girlfriend. It's up to Lizzie to get back at her what she thinks is lost, and Gordo must open his eyes to reality.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to the Lizzie McGuire TV Show, Disney does. I'm not getting paid for this.
Dedicated to: TheNewJP1987. Thanks for your help.
(¯·..·´¯·.·•» Damned Silence «•·.·´¯·..·´¯)
"Why did I remain silent until now?"
PROLOGUE
…Truth hurts…
"You really think that?" – Miranda asked.
"Yes." – Lizzie answered, looking at the floor.
Miranda stood up from the chair she was sitting on, listening to a confession that didn't surprised her. She knew it all the time, and she felt pleased for what she just listened.
"I knew it." – She said, turning over, giving her back to herandsmiling.
Lizzie glanced Miranda, feeling surprised, but without saying anything. Why Miranda was saying that right now? Why did she never say anything if she knew it?... Lizzie puffed, yet surprised, and looked at the floor again.
"What will you do?" – Miranda asked, approaching and kneeling in front of her.
"I don't know." – Lizzie answered with a whisper appeased by the tears streaming down from her hazel eyes – "I don't know."
Miranda hugged her without hesitation. Lizzie, at feeling that human heat she needed so badly, did the same… her soul was broken and she couldn't bear the burden… it was too much for her.
Her vision rapidly became blurred because of her tears… It was the second time she cried for a man, but this time it was, without any doubt, more painful and unbearable.
She always had him at her side, he was there for her when she was alone, she had him as his friend along her whole life, nevertheless… now it seemed she never realized about that. A rough sob ripped apart her heart. Why she never looked around her to see what was happening? Why she never realized about what she had, before losing it?
Maybe the words and hints, took over the truth, as the lures and fights did. The kiss they shared one night at the rooftop of a roman hotel had shown her the reality that was hanging around in front of her… but her eyes were covered up by a bandage called indifference.
"Lizzie, please, calm down…" – Miranda said, hugging her. Lizzie had become strong and determined the last months… so she never imagined seeing her friend hurting that way. Destiny was playing its cards with them, and gave the worst ones to Lizzie… Her friend was down… and she too. They both were feeling terrible. Your friends always feel the pain you feel, regardless the distance or not having lived the same situations.
"I can't Miranda…" – she mumbled softly – "…I can't."
Why life was revealing to her the truth, right now, and so late?
And she thought Gordo felt the same way for her, she thought that kiss could have been the beginning of a relationship between them, but she was wrong. It seemed like it wasn't expected in Gordo's plans … She thought he didn't love her… She thought that David Gordon didn't love her the way she loved him.
"Gordo loves you, Lizzie." – Miranda said, looking at Lizzie in the eyes– "I know."
A sad and inexpressive smile came to the face of the blonde girl, and she got up from the bed and walked towards the window, shaking her head disconsolately.
"If he really loved me as you say, he'd never, do you hear me? He'd never been hanging out and holding hands in front of everyone with Parker, he'd never asked Parker to be his girlfriend" – Lizzie muttered loudly, clenching her teeth, and pointing Miranda with her finger.
A knot in the throat kept Miranda from objecting anything. Maybe Lizzie was right.
"After what happened in Roma… did you talk about that?" – Miranda asked, staring Lizzie.
"No."
"Haven't you thought that possibly that's the reason for Gordo being with Parker?" – She said, calmly – "Although you were who kissed him, you never told him that you really meant that kiss, and that it wasn't only an unexpected reaction caused by the emotion of the moment."
"Come on!" – Lizzie exclaimed, wiping furiously the tears on her cheeks– "That wasn't necessary, Miranda!"
"Actually, it was necessary!" – Miranda refuted, and went next to Lizzie – "He wanted to hear it from your lips, he wanted to confirm his suspicions, but since you never said that, he took what he thought was the easiest exit."
Lizzie walked away from Miranda, covering her face with her hands.
"Did he tell you?" – Lizzie asked, looking for an answer.
"No… I realized that." – Miranda affirmed with confidence– "It's in your eyes."
Lizzie sighed and laid down on the bed.
"Lizzie… I think you'd better wait the storm to fade out." – Miranda advised, crossing the arms and giving her a serious look – "Everything has been so sudden…"
"Everyone but me has noticed about what was happening… How could I be so blind?" – Lizzie reproached to herself.
"My friend… Don't lose your hope…"
"I've already lost it." – Lizzie whispered discouraged and turning to hug a cushion– "I lost it when Parker kissed him in front of everyone at school." A few seconds of uncomfortable silence kept her from crying, but after that, a memory come to her mind, and she asked herself, claiming herself… "Why did I remain silent, if I realized what was I feeling?" Why was I so stupid?"
Miranda sat down on the bed and hugged Lizzie. Lizzie's tears wet the cushion that she was holding.
Was the truth able to hurt a person in that way? If it was, Miranda would have preferred a lie to the truth, only to not seeing Lizzie McGuire suffering that way. Sometimes love is weird and painful.
– DS –
Gordo hung the phone up and lay on his bed. He was thinking about if his decision was the right one, between so many options… and felt trembling when he heard a "No" coming from the deeper nook of his soul. But he tried to hide it with a "yes" coming from his mouth.
He thought his decision couldn't hurt anyone, that it was the best one… better than going away from her by changing of school, or by moving to other city. It was the best decision and he knew it.
A person at his side could be his support, a help to carry his burden… an exit to find his truth, or his own perdition. She was the prefect tool… Tool? How could he use that word to refer to a person? He had changed a lot, right, but he hadn't became a man of steel, although circumstances were forcing him to do it… although Lizzie McGuire was forcing him to do it.
Pretending being a man who doesn't feel anything, had worked sometimes to not hurt himself more, each time he though she could never feel the same way for him, that she could never feel the same love and protection feelings for him. That mask always had worked.
He breathed deeply at listen the bell of the clock, announcing ten o'clock p.m. …
A vain hope gave life to his dead heart at seeing Lizzie's reaction when Parker, his girlfriend, had kissed him in front of everyone. What if those eyes, full with confusion, wanted to transmit a hidden message to him, What if that face with an expression of hurting surprise wanted to express with that simple expression a small hope?... Had he done the right thing when he asked Parker McKenzie to be his girlfriend, three days ago?
He shaked his head and sat down again on his bed.
Lizzie's image came to his mind like an arrow perforating his brain … He loved her, there wasn't any doubt about that, but he couldn't stand having her so near, and at the same time so far… He had chosen the easiest exit, and he felt bad with himself for that. He didn't use to act that way.
How would be his relationship with Lizzie from now? Would it be different or would it be the same?
Nothing could be the same. If it were… in that right moment the three friends should be talking by phone about school stuff and another things, as they always used to do...
He didn't want to give false hopes to himself… After what happened at Rome, she didn't show any sign to want to have something together, they never talked about that. All his hopes faded away slowly, and sank in a sea of tears; tears came from his soul … and with those hopes, all the fantasy of being together.
He stood up again and looked through the window. The moonlight was shining on the green grass of the patio.
His life was starting over again… his life had to continue. The pain was strong but eventually he'd rise and follow his road. It was difficult to understand that she didn't love him but he had to carry on… carry on without her.
He looked his own reflection on the glass of the window and put his hand on it …
"I'm going to forget about you, Lizzie McGuire." – he whispered, with a suddenly strong voice.– "I will."
A black cloud covered the moon and darkness made its way into the room for a moment, as if it was giving strength to the promise made in that moment… A promise that should be kept by any means necessary.
He had to forget about his feelings; he had to tear Lizzie off from his heart, although he knew that a part of his soul would be destroyed by carrying out that promise.
◄ ░ W – MME ░ ►
What's up, Lizzie fans? Here it is a new Lizzie McGuire story.
It' my first Lizzie McGuire fic, I write fanfics of Harry Potter in Spanish – JK Rowling's books fascinate me, as Daniel Radcliffe does ;) – and I wanted to try something new and here is my work. Your opinions and reviews will make me happy, See you, and wait for next chapter.
---,-'-- O :ŴĬƬĆĦ MľĄ MĀĹƒƠƳ ƎƦƦEĿǬŢ: O--'-,---