"The Difference"
Part III
Princess Faux
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Wind blew against him, rustling his clothes, tangling his hair; everything was in an uproar as he felt the ground fly against his feet. It felt as if the ground was the one moving, and not he. The rhythm of his feet pounding against the earth was imbedded into his mind; he could hear it as if it were alive, coursing throughout his head, body and blood. It was the natural, completely animalistic instinct in him that allowed him to travel so: to move immediately, speedily without a moment's hesitation.

Trees loomed in front of him, now behind him, now gone, lost and forgotten. The bare ground was hard and cold against his bare feet, but he ignored it, continuing at the fearsome pace he was already moving at. Bushes surrounded the ground, sometimes leaving him bare patches of ground to step upon; other times, giving him no space at all, forcing him to take gigantic leaps over the bushes in order for him to continue to where he was going. Limbs and branches were all over the place, whether still connected to the trees or broken and dead on the forest floor. Grass sometimes appeared on the floor, making the ground slightly more comfortable for him to step on yet only for him to crush in an instant.

The animals of the forest were sometimes eerily silent; others were sometimes loud and obnoxious. There were birds that flittered nosily from their nests to the skies, trying to avoid the dangerous demon that was coming their way. Monkeys, chimpanzees screeched in near approval to his actions, as if cheering him on. Forrest crickets continued their noisy night melody. All were natural scenes that he was used to once long ago when he had done this more often. A time that seemed as if it were only yesterday. Seemed like it was only yesterday because he had been asleep during most of the time that he had lived.

He could hear his fast, yet steady breathing, taking in pants of air to fill his lungs periodically, to keep up his speed. Almost in the same rhythm of his breathing were the heavy pounding of his feet against the ground. It was mesmerizing and it urged him to continue, to chase--to feed. Swiftly, he moved from side to side, never losing his target, breathing, inhaling his prey's scent, never allowing his prey to go too far. It was a game to him, just an unnecessary game. He wasn't hungry, hadn't been hungry for days. Food was nothing to him, nothing of importance. But the hunt, the chase, the thrill...

In the hunt, he didn't need to think, didn't need to formulate a plan--not that he ever did. Everything came out of his instincts; everything came to him out of sheer will. Years ago he had been faster, had been ruthless. Now, he was considered weak; not the weakest of demons--certainly not!--but he had let his human side of him out too often, showing care, compassion... No, he wasn't as strong willed as he once was. But now that he was hunting again, everything flooded back into his mind.

His claws dug deep into the earth and he pushed himself forward, taking in the deep, heavy breaths of air as he sped forward. Something darted in front of him just on the border of his line of vision. On instinct, he turned sharply, diving through the brush in front of him.

The prey was in his sight now, tired, worn out form the chase. In an incredibly quick reaction, the demon pounced, barely missing the target as it dodged away, falling heavily. It squirmed, struggling with its long legs as it scrambling off the ground. The demon growled, baring his fangs. Again, he dived right back into the hunt, his eyes glaring hungrily on the wary animal.

With another pounce, the hanyou captured his prey. In the blink of an eye, the prey was dead, sliced cleanly. In that instant, Inu-Yasha let out a loud bellow of anguish, the heavy burden of his pain coming back at him in full blast. It had been the chase and the hunt that had enabled him to forget everything, to forget his pain, his miseries, and just to be... To /be/. Now that the hunt was completed, everything surrounded him again, pushing at his thoughts and at his heart. The hanyou fell to his knees, his hands covered in blood, his clothing intact, barely dirty from his invigorating exercise.

The pain and emotions surged through his head, making him despise himself for being so weak. One of the many benefits of his demon side was that a demon really did not have to care about the emotions that lay deep beneath the exterior. A true demon was completely ruthless; he would not care about what he was doing, he would not care about the consequences. He would never care about the people or other beings that would be affected by his actions. Never. All a true demon would care about is himself.

Demons were funny creatures. They were completely selfish. And greedy. And emotionless. Or... were they?

Inu-Yasha's heart was still pounding in his ears. He swallowed, continuing to take in deep, heavy breaths to calm himself. Where was his self-control? Everything around him was his life. This chaos that was called the forest was his home, his order. He knew where everything was, knew everything in it. He should be resting now, comfortably on a branch where the wind would blow softly against his face and soothe him into slumber.

He should be lounging in a tree, watching her sleep, as he always did. The girl would be curled up in her 'sleeping bag' with Shippo nearby, sleeping in the crook of one of the tree's visible roots. Her hand would be resting lightly on the pillow and her face would be at peace in her slumber--completely different from whenever she was angry with him. And she would look completely beautiful. Especially in the moonlight when its beams fell against her face, outlining the small curve of her chin and her body nestled in the bag. Sometimes, her lips would part as she gave a small sigh, whether from pleasant dreams or just from weariness, giving him the urge to reach out and touch her lips with a fingertip or if he so dared to hope, his own lips.

But wherever it was that he rested, he would never be too far that he couldn't hear her breathing, or her heart beating in her chest. He would always be near enough to smell her lovely scent, the scent that drove him crazy at times and soothed him at others. He had never dared to be too far away from her at night for fear that something would happen to her and he would lose her. There had always been that urgency to protect her, to keep her from harm no matter where they were or what situation they were in. She was his and he would always protect her. Or so he believed.

Foolishly, he had been content with what he had. He had been given another chance from the Kami; a chance to make amends for what had happened between Kikyo and he. And he believed that if he could repair things this time, perhaps his punishment would not be so severe: for nearly destroying the whole village; for setting the village on fire and killing ruthlessly those who lived inside of it. For nearly becoming a demon in his heart.

His breathing slowly became normal again, his heartbeat slowed to its normal pace. His eyes were unfocused as he stared off into the night. The animals of the forest that were once so noisy during his hunt were now deadly silent after being frightened by his animalistic roar. Absentmindedly, he raised his fingers to his mouth and licked away the blood, cleaning his bloodied claws.

Things were complicated in his mind; so complicated that he supposed he would never be able to explain it to someone else, or much less to himself. There were so many things that he believed in, things that had been set firmly in his mind when he was a little child. But now, as he was just a little bit older... from all the things that he had seen and learned, he knew differently--but did he believe differently?

As a child, he knew that he was different from everyone else. Not a human, but not a demon. And his place in the world was undefined; he would have to find the definition for himself. He had seen countless demons in his life and they were all horrible. Crude, evil, selfish and conniving. Not one demon that he had met had been anything like his father. Not even Sesshou-Maru, his father's one true son. And so he had believed it: demons were evil and unforgiving. His father was something else.

His was forced away from his home after his mother died. Brutally murdered. He ran away to a place far away from his father's house. And then he had met Kikyo. She was nothing like a demon, even though she had pretended to have a heart of stone. But in many ways, she reminded him of his mother. He had spent countless afternoons, mornings, days and nights following her, learning about her, watching her. She had become an object of fascination because she was human. Perhaps there was also something more, but first because she was a human that reminded him of his mother.

He would see his mother in her when she was playing with the children, protecting them from danger, or teaching them things. Always moving like a goddess, as if floating in the air. There was a certain grace that surrounded her being and it fascinated him. And then she seemed like a sister whenever she caught him darting in the trees, scolding him, telling him to stay away. Then, she was much more when she allowed him to come near to her, to spend her afternoons with her. And he was able to share a little of who he was with her. She in turn, shared a little bit of what she truly wanted, with him. And in this, they had something truly unique.

In time, he was betrayed. By Naraku, but at the time he had believed that it was Kikyo that betrayed him. That shattered his dreams and his beliefs in mankind: his belief that man was truly better than demons, because they did /good/ things and believed in good things. He never wanted to trust another human again.

And then he met her. She woke him up with her scent, not Kikyo's, but hers, a scent completely and uniquely hers. He didn't trust her, did not want to, did not believe that he ever would. But he stayed near her for reasons unknown. And he made her stay close to him as well. He told himself that all he wanted from this girl was the jewel, and once he had that jewel, he would become a demon so that it would make his heart stronger so that he might forget about the betrayal he lived through caused by Kikyo.

What he could not figure out now was: did he mean to make his heart stronger? or colder? He truly believed that a demon's heart was cold, as his was--at least partially. His was cold because he never allowed himself to grow with her, to show her his feelings. And a demon's heart wasn't really strong; after all, it was only a cold, unfeeling heart that allowed a demon to do the cruel things that he did, wasn't it?

As he thought about it, he could only think that if he wanted a strong heart, he would have to become human. Only humans had a heart of such strength, like hers. His eyes closed in shame, a pain that burned him deeply. Would she really come back and face him? Of course she would; she was Kagome and she kept her promises. But how she could ever come back to face him, the horrible creature that he was... It completely baffled him. He was completely terrified at the prospect of meeting her again; to have her scream at him, or worse yet, look at him the way she did that afternoon, eyes uncaring and cold. His body burned apathetically and his mouth dried in distaste. He would be broken, this time so much more than the time he had been disappointed by Kikyo's betrayal.

He opened his eyes, staring off in the night sky. He knew he should get going, since all the carcass was doing was rotting and attracting unnecessary attention. But he was tired, in a sense, at least mentally tired. The hunt had done nothing but increase his senses and toughened up his body. He felt alert for anything, but his mind felt lost and disoriented. It frustrated him to no ends, to feel so alive and so invigorated yet at the same time, so slow... so old. Slowly, he got to his feet and licked his lips clean. Stooping over, he picked up the dead animal and swung it over his shoulder, intending to bring it back to the village.

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The sounds of nature surrounded her completely. The wind enveloped her in a comforting hug, caressing her as it ran its fingers through her hair. She had her eyes closed in concentration, giving the pretense that she was actually listening for something unheard. Nature was alive, surrounding her, pushing at her to recognize nature's awesome presence. Had she not been trained to stay away from its temptations, she would have been lost on her road on meditation.

Right now, away from nature's pushing and prodding, away from the distractions of living, she was being one with nature, and merely existing. With the peace so fully embedded in her mind, she allowed herself to be calm once again, away from the uproar that was life.

Was she escaping her life? The answer was no. After all, how could she when she wasn't truly living? She was a shell with a soul. This wasn't even her real body. In likelihood, it was part of her body, part of her ashes mixed with earth. Yet for weeks, she had been so convinced that she was alive. She was breathing air, and though she was not truly alive, she was living. She had vowed that day when Urasue brought her back to the land of the living... she swore that she would not die until he did.

Weeks of wandering had brought her back here, back to the village that she once served at as a priestess, protecting the Shikon jewel and everyone within the vicinity. But within those few weeks, she found herself wondering about that day. Her soul, she remembered so distinctly, did not want to come back to the land of the living. Perhaps, in the land of the dead, she had found peace, only to be ripped away from that peace back into a life of hatred for a hanyou that betrayed her.

She believed in him, gave him her thoughts and her dreams. She even believed that he would spend the rest of his life with her and in doing so, believed that she would not die old and alone like she thought she would before she met Inu-Yasha.

His words from that day came back to haunt her, telling her that he no longer dreamed of trying to convince her that he still cared for her. What had he meant? What did it all mean? That girl, could she have had so much influence on him in--what? a matter of weeks?--when she had his whole teenage lifetime with him to share? Could she be so easily replaceable?

All these thoughts brought nothing to her but anger, a warm caressing sensation that flowed not only through her body and blood, but also in her soul. Or what little there remained of it. It burned inside of her, slowly feeding her energy like she had never felt before. As a priestess, she only dabbled in the powers of good, using these powers to ward off demons, sometimes slaying them to prevent them from coming back, and also to warn other demons of her power. She had used these powers to protect the innocent.

But this new power that burned inside of her was different. It burned with a fiery passion inside of her, and not only did it burn, it grew, giving her more power than she had ever imagined. To find peace within her being, within her soul, all she had to do was use this immense power against Inu-Yasha, and she would take him to Hell with her--to spend an eternity together.

A shiver went throughout her body as she was called back to the times when they were once allies and companions; a time when he didn't fear her and when she trusted him with her entire being. He had promised a lifetime with her where they would live a normal life. She would no longer be a slave to the jewel and she would no longer ever feel the aching cold of loneliness.

She was an innocent fool... of course she was. It was all she had been to believe that a demon could think of anyone other than himself... He had planned to deceive her from the start. But she wanted so desperately to believe otherwise... This demon, that she saw this afternoon, standing so vulnerably in the forest, waiting for his precious miko to come back to him and make up with him. It was the perfect opportunity to get to him and destroy him once and for all.

But there was something that tugged at her being when she approached him. Watching him from a distance made her realize that he was still going through the exact same vulnerability that she had been through, and perhaps, was still going through. She knew he was scared of living a life alone, knowing that he would never be accepted in the ways that he wanted to be accepted. He was an idiot for not letting her know his true feelings. An idiot that was only hurting himself for the things that he was scared of doing.

In this small moment of realization, she could not let the anger overwhelm her. Not when he was so close to her, physically and emotionally. She wanted to tell him, show him that he would never be alone if he allowed her to be there with him. She had to know if he was still the same and willing or if he had changed. But she didn't know what she would do if she would find out either.

She was a wise priestess. She was brought up to think on all aspects of the situation. Who would have ever imagined that she would be in such a tricky predicament such as this?

Looking at him was like looking into a mirror that reflected her innermost feelings on vulnerability. Anger had no place here. As the anger receded from her thoughts and from her being, she thought clearly whether or not taking him to Hell would accomplish anything. Would she truly be able to rest in peace? knowing that Inu-Yasha was spending his eternity with her damned in Hell?

Her thoughts had been so clear when his lips touched hers. Anger melted away like the snow on the mountains on a bright, cloudless, sunny day. For once, not only did she feel like she was living again, but she was truly alive, in life, not death.

Now she was here, meditating with all of her being, searching for the right answers. As was expected, she thought much clearer when her mind was free from distractions: not only from life, but also from herself and from her anger.

A beastly cry emerged from the forest, breaking her concentration, sending her back into the land of the living where every being and aspect of life assaulted her senses. She inhaled deeply, calming herself. Anger must wait. She had to find her answers before she damned herself for an eternity.

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Kikyo began to rise up from the hard, unfeeling floor. By sheer impulse, she froze in her place, kneeling as she listened for any unusual sounds in the night. Sure enough, as she waited, she heard the rustling of one of the curtains covering the shed outside.

With a skilled hand, she reached out quietly for the bow and her case of arrows. With a soft grip, she slung the case over her shoulder, securing it tightly while making sure the arrows were within reach. Then, with a confidence that came naturally, she left the shrine and headed out towards the shack outside.

Pushing aside the door to the shrine, she felt the wind blow against her face and heard nature much more clearly in her mind than she ever did before. She felt as if she and nature were one again, their hearts beating in perfect harmony. Stepping towards the shed, she pushed aside the curtain with her hand, wondering what she might find inside.

Inside she found Inu-Yasha carving the fur from the raw meat. Slowly, he lifted his eyes from his work to the doorway where he met Kikyo's steady gaze. Without much thought, he turned his head back to his work, moving slowly yet steadily. He finished removing the skin from the meat and laid it neatly aside. It seemed that he knew exactly what he was doing, carving the skin and cleaning the dead animal.

Cautiously, she lowered her bow, letting it rest at her side while she watched his movements. With a knife, he sliced at the meat, swiftly and cleanly, separating the edible meat from the rest. It seemed by his precise cuts and movements that he had done this many times before. He had finished carving the meat and now he started to cut them up into large portions. Setting the knife aside, he reached over the table into a large sack and pulled out a handful of black pepper.

He slowly but evenly dispersed the pepper over the meat, taking his time with each piece, sometimes going back into the bag for more if needed. After that, he reached over the table again and reached into a different sack, one filled with salt. Again, he went through the process and covered each piece with salt. With a heavy sigh, he reached high above to the ceiling of the small room and pulled down some of the spare metal hooks. Swiftly, he pierced each piece of the seasoned meat with its own hook. Then, he raised each piece, one at a time, to the ceiling, leaving it for Kaede to care for in the morning. Once finished with his task, he slowly lowered his arms from the meat, his shoulders sagging, tired and worn out.

He then turned and faced Kikyo who was now leaning comfortably in the doorway, bow and arrow put away. "What did you do that for?" she asked him, her voice quiet in consideration for those who were already fast asleep. "Why did you not just feast upon the meat after you had defeated the animal?"

He shrugged carelessly, a wry smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "I used to do it for you. Kaede is too old to go hunting, and the villagers don't hunt as well as I do anyway." He looked into her eyes once and then looked away as he walked passed her, squeezing through the tight doorway. He noticed through his heightened senses that she followed him, not too far behind.

"You did not even take a bite of your meat," she commented.

"Iie," he confirmed tersely. He stepped outside of the shrine and stooped by the barrow of water that was placed there. Hastily, he dipped his hands into the cold water and washed them from the strong scent of salt as well as the pepper and the blood. Absentmindedly, he stated, "I remember when I used to hunt at night, after I thought you had fallen asleep." He swallowed, looking at his hands, still trying to remove the blood from beneath his fingertips. "I never ate then, either."

Then... it seemed like such a long time ago in her mind. Times of trust between the two seemed far away, too long ago. She knew that if she had killed him that one day she had met him, she wouldn't have all these troubles that she had now. If she had killed him while he was still just a little demon, trying to be a big demon, she wouldn't have to worry about all the villagers' lives that he had taken. But she had found him so innocently naive that she couldn't help but spare his worthless life. And he had come back time and time again, no matter how many times she would put an arrow through his body. The next day, he would be there, the same place where she was, his wounds already healed.

Back then Inu-Yasha had hunted quite often. He left to go off on his own, trying to become bigger and stronger. He reasoned with her, telling her that until he took the Jewel of Four Souls from her, he might has well try and become strong anyway. And he would take off after the first big creature his eye saw and he would start the chase. The stupid mutt never knew when to give up; he never knew when a battle was too much for him. But he was young, and he would have to learn. And he always came back, leaving his extra food at her footstep at the very latest hours of the night, always coming when no one would see him.

A small smile found its way to her lips. She missed the naïve little pup, missed the times that she spent with him, missed him with all of her being.

"No. You did not." She didn't know whether it was the night that had made them talk the way they did, or made them feel the way they were feeling--tired and worn out, aged in a way. His movements were slow and weary, as were hers. Perhaps it was the company that they were currently keeping. She felt sorry for him; sorry for all the emotions he was going through. They were emotions that, as a demon, he should have never experienced: pain, sorrow, despair, vulnerability and loss of love.

As he continued to clean his hands, now doing so just because it was something to do, she took a seat on the steps of the shrine. "Why did you never do that?" she asked out of curiosity.

He looked at her, as if she was mad for asking such a question. He shrugged again and took his hands out of the water, flicking his fingers in no specific direction to remove the extra water drops from his hands, before taking a seat on the steps, a few paces away from her. "I don't know." He paused, thinking before continuing. "I hunt... for the hunt."

"To strengthen you," she added. "I know."

He nodded in agreement. "There was no reason for me to eat, if I wasn't hungry. So... I would give it to you, knowing that you would give it to the people that needed the food."

She smiled at the comment. "You have become soft."

His face flushed and he was about to snap back some crude comment before he caught his tongue, thinking the better of it. "It's my human weakness," he retorted. Then, as a lingering thought, "She brought it out."

There was a lapse of silence as he allowed himself to think about her. She was never far from his thoughts anyway. He longed for her so much, to have her back here, next to him like she belonged.

As for Kikyo, she found it surprising that he would even admit so much. Sure, Inu-Yasha was brash, always eager to prove himself. But he had always been a bit timid when it came to his emotions. He had never been able to express any of his feelings except for anger and hatred... emotions of the negative sort. After a moment, she asked quietly, thoughtfully--as if she was talking to herself, "She means a lot to you?"

There was a long period of silence before he parted his lips to answer with a simple word, "Hai."

"Then," Kikyo said. "You must have spent quite a bit of time with her to act the way you do now. After all, it took months, if not a whole year, before you started to talk to me in the open."

"Her... character is a lot different from yours, Kikyo," he answered softly, clawing at the ground with one finger, tracing figures into the earth. "There are things in her that made her seem more... easier for me to be with." He looked out at the dark sky, knowing that it was well into the night already, wondering if his miko was at home, sleeping soundly, or if she was wrestling with her emotions as he was doing now.

"Easier..." Kikyo murmured, pondering the meaning behind the words. It was difficult to see her former love to compare his new beloved with her. It made her want to bring him into Hell and make him suffer as she was. The anger was back, burning brightly in her grasp. Quickly, she shut her eyes and forced the emotion away. As she closed her eyes, she could actually see her anger, a bright, white cloud in her mind. For a moment, it fascinated her, making want to reach out and touch the expanse. In her mind, she actually reached out, her 'fingertips' barely grazing the light. Slightly touching her anger, the energy burned her, coursing throughout her body, through her veins. The power was incredible and frightening at the same time. Scared, she took in one deep, quiet, breath of air; she opened her eyes and reasoned with herself.

He was in love with her reincarnation, a part of her, but not. Time had changed her, this Kagome. And, if she allowed, Time would change her, Kikyo, as well. Perhaps, in time, Kikyo would heal and live again. But even with time, Kikyo knew, she would never be able to live as a human, only as a demon.

"... Different."

Kikyo looked up from her daze and her eyes lingered in Inu-Yasha's still form. "Gomen... nasai...?" she asked slowly, wondering what he was talking about.

With a sigh, he answered her, "She's just different from who you are, Kikyo." He looked up at her shortly, seeing the bewilderment in her eyes. "She's a lot different. She doesn't worry about things as much as you did; of course, she always wants to go back to her home to study... But that's about it. If it weren't for that, I don't think she would worry at all." He snorted in amusement and contempt; "She even loses the Shikon shards from time to time."

Kikyo furrowed her brows, a bit upset. This was her reincarnate? A flimsy little girl that lacked responsibilities to the point where she didn't even care about what the Power of a shard from the Jewel of Four Souls can do if they were to fall into the hands of a youkai? How could this be? she fumed angrily.

"But that's what makes her so unique... She's carefree... and happy most of the time. Not like how she was this afternoon." He swallowed, feeling a sharp pain in his chest. Nevertheless, he continued. "She's so different from who you used to be, from who you are. Perhaps, that's what Kami-sama wanted, you know?" he thought aloud. "Since you had so many responsibilities in your old life, that they created her and gave her your soul, so that you could experience joy and happiness." He was silent again, the ache in his heart growing. "Kami-sama, I miss her already."

He heard the short ruffling of Kikyo's movements before he felt the touch of her hand on his shoulder. "She's changed you."

"She's only helped me become who I wanted to be."

"You wanted to be a full youkai," she objected, without much force.

"I wanted a family, above all."

Kikyo looked away, feeling the bitterness in his voice. They were supposed to be a family, supposed to have become a family before... before that horrible, horrible event. Before her bitterness could eat at her, she smiled as she remembered, "You used to talk about that, with me."

"Hai."

"Remember those afternoons, Inu-Yasha? Sitting in the light of the setting sun, and just... talking about life?"

"Hai."

"Did it seem so long ago?"

Inu-Yasha sighed again and shook his head. "Iie, it doesn't. I've lived for a long time, I suppose. But I don't feel any different from when I was young... and stupid."

Kikyo smirked, wanting to laugh. But laughter coming from her sounded hollow and empty. "Those days do not seem so far away from me, either." A lie. But, she honestly wished that it wasn't so long ago.

Inu-Yasha swallowed the bitter taste he was feeling in his mouth and stood up from the steps of the shrine, shrugging off Kikyo's hand from his shoulder. He wished, resentfully, that it was Kagome that was sitting here with him, sharing the night with her, and just enjoying her company.

He shrugged her off so easily; a movement that was so quick and... thoughtless. Kikyo steeled herself against her emotions, trying to the fight the anger that was slowly building inside of her again. It was torture to her to be here with him, knowing that he wanted somebody else when he himself stated that it was not 'so long ago' when he remembered the times that they shared together. Replaceable--was that what she was?

"I never told her, Kikyo," Inu-Yasha murmured. "To... to allow myself to be here with you, to share sweet memories about a time when we were once happy... it would be to dishonor her."

Kikyo's eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Never? She does not know anything about what you feel for her?"

He did answer right away. He only stared off into the dark before he slowly shook his head in affirmation to her words. "I was... am scared." He turned around and looked at her finally, staring into her eyes with sad, tired eyes of his own. He smiled weakly as he spoke, "What if I lose her again? Like I lost you, Kikyo? I only get so many chances from the Kami. And this is a chance that I don't want to mess up." He turned away again.

Kikyo knew when a fight was over. It wasn't hard to tell when which side was defeated. In this fight, for Inu-Yasha, she had never been in good favor of the odds. The bitterness of knowing that welled up inside of her. It overwhelmed her whole being so much, that she could taste the bitterness in her mouth. "Ne," she murmured, wondering if she was comforting herself or him. "You will not let her go without a fight, would you Inu-Yasha?"

He whirled around, growling, "Of course not!"

She smiled weakly and continued, "Afraid of losing her, are you? Ne, Inu-Yasha, you are such a weak demon to be afraid without even trying."

"I am not weak!" he growled again, darting before her with such speed that even she was surprised. His eyes gazed heavily into hers, bright golden orbs blazing with a passion. His eyes widened as he watched her pupils slowly begin to change colors, her eyes becoming a glowing, silvery shade of white.

"Then," she whispered, her hand coming up to touch his face, "You should try much harder." Her fingertips touched his face lightly; her fingers warm to the touch.

Before he could blink, a large bolt of energy came from her hand, throwing him far away from the shrine. He stared at her, watching intently as she stood in the middle of the doorway, her body glowing with a luminescent light. Her hair loosened from the hair tie in the back. Strong winds picked up from the ground, blowing against her, making her hair flutter in all sorts of directions. Inu-Yasha could only stare in disbelief at her cold, emotionless eyes, even as the burn caused an incredible amount of pain. His eyes widen even further as several white, glowing orbs come from inside of her body, darting in and out of each other's path as they headed straight for him.

On impulse, he dived away as several of the orbs missed him while another hit him on his arched back. He howled in pain as his eyes glowed with a passionate anger. "Kikyo!" he screamed, "What are you doing?"

He darted away from even more bolts of light, trying to dodge the energy spheres while trying to get closer to her. He glanced up quickly, looking for her. His eyes made contact with hers and he gasped at what he saw. That brief instant, as he was caught unaware, three spheres crashed into him, sending crashing into the ground.

"Inu-Yasha!"

Inu-Yasha crawled off of the ground, his eyes darting back and forth, wary of more energy orbs that would come at him. He found none. Wary and hurt, he collapsed, his eyes closing as a reflex. Burned into his mind was the image of Kikyo, her body lifted up into the air with a bright white light surrounding her, her eyes wide open and completely terrified. There was a fear burned in those eyes as the energy willingly came out from her unwilling body. She had no control over her powers or her anger.

Inu-Yasha groaned as he lifted himself off of the ground. "Kikyo," he moaned, forcing himself to open his eyes. "You..." he started.

"Gomen, Inu-Yasha," came a weak voice.

Inu-Yasha's eyes darted around until he found what he was looking for. She was no longer floating in the air; she wasn't even standing. Huddled in the corner of the doorway was the small form of Kikyo, her legs pressed up carefully against her body, her arms wrapped up protectively around herself and her head hidden within the comfort of her arms. "Kikyo," he whispered, trying to take a step towards her.

"Do not!" she cried, her voice muffled.

"You have to let me help, Kikyo, please," Inu-Yasha insisted, trying to keep is voice calm and soothing, but he himself was terrified too. "I... I know what's happening to you, so please..."

"Anger... it is eating away at me, is it not, Inu-Yasha?"

Inu-Yasha's shoulders drooped at the helplessness in her voice. The strong miko that Kikyo once was, reduced to a scared young girl like this. It wasn't right. It wasn't natural... It was horrible.

"... Gomen ne, Inu-Yasha." Her voice was small and unsteady. "I did not mean to do that to you. I... know I had no control over this. And if I am right, I never will. There's an incredible amount of anger inside of me. There had always been since Urasue... and I did not recognize it until now. I am becoming stronger and stronger every day. I can feel you much more than I did as a priestess. I can feel whenever a demon is nearby, much more clearer now, since I am a demon now."

Inu-Yasha cringed, clenching his fists angrily. Fate was incredibly cruel to them, to have this happen like this.

"You must leave, Inu-Yasha." She paused, her voice becoming stronger now, and not so weak as it sounded before. "I will not give up without a fight. I will try to control this power to the best of my ability but... I can only do so much." Kikyo lifted up her head from her arms, her eyes glowing eerily again. "You must leave!"

Inu-Yasha stared at her, this girl that he had never seen before. Anger burned inside that small shell of a body. It was truly a sight to behold and fear. How could it be that this human priestess, once so strong and fearful, was reduced to a shivering little girl in a corner, with the powers of a demon?

"Leave!" she screamed. Once again, the light engulfed her, orbs shooting out, this time with her willing. He cursed as he dived away again, heading back into the forest with no pretense of going back. As he ran two orbs shot out from behind him and hit him once in the hip, another in the thigh. He screamed in agony, a curse echoing through the forest. Frustrated, he ran as fast as he could, ignoring the pain in his legs and leaped off of the ground into the sky. In turned his head back to look for the priestess. From the sky, he could still see her hard cold eyes glaring up at him.

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Inu-Yasha landed, completely tired and worn out, blood leaving his body at a dangerous pace. He leaned back on his branch, resting against the hard yet comforting bark of the tree. He ignored the pain and gave in to the weariness of his body, closing his eyes slowly. Before he fell asleep, he glanced at the well in hopes that she would come back soon. Perhaps this time, if she was willing, he would even let her dress his wounds.

He gave into unconsciousness, a fever started to form. It did not help him when he began to inhale in the cold scent of his brother. Mixed in with the fever, he began to dream of his past, his childhood with his mother and what little time he spent with his father. His pleasant dreams quickly became nightmares, haunting him.

Kikyo stared at his sleeping figure, a sad look in her eyes. She could sense the fever, and saw the trouble he was having with his horrid dreams. She was no longer surprised at her powers when she used them to lift herself off of the ground and into the sky, hovering skillfully at Inu-Yasha's side. With patience, she raised one hand over his head and the other above his chest. Closing her eyes, she concentrated on him and on her powers, taping into the energy that she possessed inside of her.

Certainly she was afraid that she might let loose the anger that grew inside of her. But she was willing to take the chance to help Inu-Yasha for now, since after all, all of this pain was her fault.

Slowly the fever began to recede, his body cooling down. Also, the wounds reverted to faded scars on his body. The only telltale signs that he had been hurt were from the tears in his clothing and the blood that soaked it.

Worry shone brightly in her eyes just like the light of her powers shone around her body. Not only was she able to sense Inu-Yasha's fever, but she had also been able to sense that there had been another demon in the area, not too long ago. Earlier, when she had been watching Inu-Yasha sleep, as she watched him toss and turn from side to side, she had been able to recognize this. It had happened before, many times before. And she had been there to witness it.

It had always been the same, the same dreams, the same words. The same rhythm of his breathing. She remembered that it was the fourth time when she had witnessed it, the morning after she asked him, "What dreams haunt you?"

He had been quiet for a long time. She was afraid that he wouldn't tell her, that he didn't trust her enough to tell her. But then he finally said, "They are memories of when my brother killed my mother."
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Comments? Suggestions? Write to me: [email protected] or visit my webpage: http://www.sickrew.net/Princess_Faux.
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Authors's Notes:

• First off, I would like to thank everyone that has been so patient in waiting for this chapter to get out, and also for all the kind comments at FF.net. All of the reviews and comments, and especially the personal emails that I received help very much! So without you guys, I wouldn't have had the perseverence to continue this Fic, despite Fluffy and all his yumminess... ^.~
• I would also like to apologize for the ridiculous amount of time that it took to get this chapter out. I would like to explain myself; this was just one of those chapters that you didn't really want to write, but you had to for the sake of the story. If you're a Fluffy (Sessho-Maru) fan, like I am, you were probably disappointed to find out that there was no Fluffy in this chapter! And that's how I was. I just wanted to skip this chapter and write about Kagome and Fluffy and... so I procrastinated and delayed. But it's not like I didn't try to write it... no, of course not. It was just that the first attempt was so... crappy that I didn't want to post it and you would have been more disappointed in me than what you already are! And it took months to get a better version out... and for that I apologize. But, if it helps, the next chapter should be out in two weeks--at the latest! because I am dying to write this chapter!
• I don't normally do this, but since this is FF.net and this is involving FanFic writers and readers, here goes: I am on a FanFic mailing list that isn't thriving as well as it could be, or as much as I want it to. I wanted a mailing list where I, as a writer, could mature. I am one of those... as I like to call it, 'reviewer' on the mL that I'm not. And I would like to expand this list. Please, please, if you're interested, either email me, or please check on my webpage: http://www.sickrew.net/Princess_Faux -- newly updated and everything. I set out a page and explained specifically what I want and why I want it, involving the list, of course; otherwise I wouldn't mind world domination =) Just kidding ^.^ Just click on the giant sunflower on the entrance page to get in, click on Anime, and then "Miscellany". There's the info you want!
• I would like to specifically address ambientplink: you noticed my spelling errors. As a request, if you're interested, would you like to be one of my Pre-Readers? I've been asking people if they could spot check my spelling errors since I get aggravated every time I see a mistake. ^.^ If you are, please email me. After all, I need all the help I can get =)
• Thank you so much for your time! I hope you'll be here for the next chapter. And as always, drop me a line!