AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: [email protected]
SUMMARY: Parker won't know what hit him!
SPOILER: The Harsh Light Of Day
DISTRIBUTION: Sandee, of course - My site - http://planetslaythis.homestead.com - Crystal and Butterfly if they want it - A Soul's Redemption - Anyone else - sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)7
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-14
DISCLAIMER: I own Xander. Okay, I don't, but I really, really wanna. In actuality, Xander belongs to Joss, but we liked to keep that quiet. g
"Is this logical?" Oz asked as he hid behind a tree.
"Logic went out the window when he hurt Buffy." Xander said seriously.
"I don't think Giles would approve." Willow said.
"'Cause it's sorta illegal?" Oz guessed.
"Because we didn't include him." Xander corrected.
"No, because we stole his weapons." Willow held up the bag full of assorted torture tools.
"He'll deal," Xander said. "We're out to destroy an evil being, weapons are for fighting evil."
"That made sense," Oz said. He looked to Willow. "Should I be scared?"
"Shhhh," Xander said. "Here he comes."
They watched as a girl walked Parker to the stairs and kissed him. He pulled away, kissing down her arm as he did so, then he left.
"When she's inside, we move." Xander said. "On three."
The girl entered her dorm and Oz took a deep breath. "One,"
"Two," Willow whispered.
"Three." Xander muttered.
"Hey Parker." Oz jumped out and greeted him.
"Oz, man, you scared me."
"You should be," he muttered. Oz grabbed his arm, holding him open. Xander's shot hit him point blank and he went down muttering a cuss word.
"Bastard," Willow kicked him in the stomach. "Can I shoot him again, so he's out longer?"
"Will," Oz said, smirking a little.
"He deserves it." she said, kicking him again.
"He deserves more than that," Xander punched him then grabbed his right fist inside his left hand, jumping up and down. "Ow, ow, OW!"
"Xander, hello, plan?" Willow said.
Each of them took turns slapping Parker's face. Then, Willow turned away and the guys stripped him to his boxers. They painted his face with lipstick and Xander wrote a phone number and "Thanks for a good time. Call me." on his chest. They tied him to a couple of tree branches, suspending him in the air.
Willow gathered everything up, tossing his clothes up into the tree branches. "You guys ready?"
"Yeah," Oz said.
"Almost," Xander backed up, then gave Parker a hard, boot covered kick in the nuts.
"Hard to tell what'll last longer," Xander said as they walked away, satisfied with their slight bit of revenge. "The pain between his legs or the emotional scarring when people see him like this and it winds up on the Internet."