9 June 2006
A word from Starry: My first ever Kannazuki No Miko fic! I wanted to end this differently but the characters went on a boycott and said they wanted to do what they wanted... so I let them. I love the ending and very happy with how the wrapped things up. I hope all of you enjoy it as much as I did writing it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Himeko or Souma or Chikane. Nothing is mine! Just the plot.
Desired Destiny
Himeko Kurusegawa lived in Tokyo, for a lot of reasons. A main reason being was the search for Chikane Himemiya... or well the reincarnation of Chikane-chan, but Himeko didn't know it… she just felt it. She felt something calling her, and she obeyed. It was already two months and no luck in finding the caller. Sure, the first day of her arrival she had caught a glimpse of someone who had the same necklace as her, and in an attempt to embrace her lost sight of her when the crowd rushed into the streets. She had been so close, yet the people had torn them apart.
Himeko shook her head, trying to see where she was, making a few long blonde strands fall in front of her violet eyes. It didn't bother her though; she was used to that already. The hair clips she had ever owned had disappeared and she didn't know why. Maybe it was after graduating from the private school she had gone all her life. She'd been packing along with Mako-chan, getting ready to head off to the big city, Tokyo. She was excited and scared at the same time. A new place meant a new start for her not so perfect life.
During her freshman year at the school, she'd been asked by the school's prince, Souma Oogami. Only, Himeko, feeling that there was someone out there for her, rejected him not really realizing how big of damage she had done to the poor boys heart. Throughout the rest of her high school years, she was criticized for rejecting the perfect boy, but deep down Himeko didn't care… she wanted to find that person in her dreams, the one who called herself the Lunar Priestess in her vision.
"Watch where you're going!"
Himeko got pulled out of her reverie as she bumped into a woman carrying a child. Her lilac colored eyes gave her a sad look and she tried to apologize but the woman had already left. "I'm sorry," she whispered, hoping that it got to the woman somehow. She turned around and continued walking on the crowded sidewalk.
A few stores caught her interest, making her go inside and purchase a few things. The stores back at home were nothing compared to the ones in Tokyo. Here, they had things that Himeko didn't even know existed until she came to live here.
"Excuse me, miss, are you going to purchase that?" asked the clerk behind the counter.
Himeko blushed, as she was holding up the pair of light blue panties, and shook her head. "No, just looking." She stepped back from the display and was about to continue looking when the man spoke.
"Alright, if you are not going to buy anything, please step out. I'm closing the store and don't want anyone who won't buy anything here. Thank you, please come again when you wish to purchase something." He waved goodbye to her as she walked out.
Once outside, Himeko rolled her eyes and muttered how rude that shopkeeper was. She suddenly remembered that her house was the other way, and not the direction that she was currently walking in. She turned around, only to bump into someone.
"Oh! I'm very sorry I wasn't watching where I was going." She looked up and came in eye contact a pair of brown eyes. She gasped, taking a step back. She knew those eyes, she'd seen those eyes always staring at her back at school. They always locked with hers in everything that she was doing, whether it was while she was going into class, running the track field or just sitting enjoying the moonlight by the lake.
"Kurusegawa-chan," said the tall, raven haired man standing in front of her. "It's been a while."
"Oogami-kun, I-I… What are you doing here?" She felt her heart racing fast, just like it had always done before her freshman year. Except, after her vision the heart had never accelerated for him anymore. So why was it trying to jump out of her chest?
Souma chuckled and ran a hand through his hair. "I live here and I just got out of work and I'm going home now. What about you? What are you doing here?" He smiled at her, no sign of hatred or anything concerning him being turned down by her.
Himeko smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear. "I live here as well, but I don't work anywhere around here." She noticed how much he had changed from the last time she had seen him. "I'm going home, too. What part of town do you live in? I live by the ocean." It surprised Himeko to realize that she suddenly liked to see and hear him laugh. She faintly blushed and was glad a few strands of hair had escaped and were now covering her face.
"I live by the ocean as well," he said, his hand freezing in mid-air. It looked as though he was going to tuck back the strands of golden hair off her face, but a past thought stopped him. He lowered his hand and pocketed it, before looking into her lavender eyes and smiling at her. "How's your search?"
"My search?"
"Yes, your search for the person you love." He chuckled, scratching his chin lightly before pocketing that hand as well.
"Oh! It's going well. I-" She cut herself off. Was it really going well? She thought it was, she'd seen a glimpse of a beautiful woman on her first day here in Tokyo… all she had to do now was search for that woman with the same necklace as hers. Her thoughts were broken when Souma spoke.
"I'm glad, Kurusegawa-chan, really glad. I wish you luck in the rest of your search. I better be going now, got to fix dinner." He smiled at her once more and proceeded in turning around to walk the way he had been walking to.
Himeko noticed the falter in his smile, how a shade of sadness had crossed his coffee eyes. She clasped her hands together and brought them up to her chest. She closed her purple eyes and began to remember the night he had confessed his love to her. It was probably horrible, confessing your love and having them thrown back at your face just like that. She opened her eyes only to find that he was no longer near her, he was off in the distance, walking away from her.
What? No, he couldn't be leaving yet! "Wait!" she yelled, running to catch up to him.
Souma paused and slowly turned around, giving the blonde a small smile as she stopped right in front of him. "Yeah?" he asked, curious to why she was here.
You're so stupid, she thought, as she looked up at the handsome man that stood in front of her. "I haven't seen you in a while and… want to go out for dinner?" She didn't know why, but she was really hoping he'd say yes.
He was taken back by this. Himeko wanted to go out for dinner with him? Wasn't she the one who had refused him a few years ago? "Dinner?" he asked, warily and pondering his answer. He should say no, and make her feel what he felt that night back when they were freshman in high school. "Are you sure about that?"
"Hai, I'm sure." She tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear and gave him an honest smile. "My treat, so don't worry about paying."
"I don't know about that yet," he said, scratching the back of his head lightly.
"Come on, Oogami-kun, don't be messed up." She hit him, but not hard, on his arm and laughed. "You'll have fun, trust me." What was happening to her? Why was she acting like this? Himeko didn't know, but she liked having his company.
Once in the restaurant, the pair was sitting in a booth facing each other and talking about their doings in the previous years. Souma had explained how he had dated a few women but none of them had what he was looking for, love. Himeko felt a bit of sadness tug at her heart remembering her answer to his confession. Himeko had told him about her vision and the hunt for the love of her life, which she is sure, is out there. Souma only nodded before looking down at his food and continuing to eat.
"That's what I've been doing ever since I left high school, looking for that person. I thought I had found her the other day but she was taken away…"
Souma stared at her with a shocked expression before going back to his normal façade. "So it's a she, then?" Damn it! He'd lost to a girl.
The violet eyed girl shrugged. "I don't know, but from the looks of it, I think it is." She gave him a sheepish grin before getting serious once more. "It's like I know she's out there, but I don't know… I need someone right now." Her purple gaze dropped to the table and she felt a knot in her throat. She felt so lonely going home to no one and just laying in bed thinking of nothing but having someone hug you and kiss you goodnight.
"I'm sure you'll find her," he said, feeling a sad emotion creeping up into his chest once more. He really hated seeing her get sad, especially over a person that wasn't in her life yet. "And then you'll be happy." He tried to smile at her, and hoped it didn't look weird.
"Thanks," her voice betraying what she wanted to portray, happiness? "I really don't know though." She bit her lip, evident that she was hesitating to say something.
"Yes, Himeko-chan?" It had been a long time since he last called her that.
"That night," she looked into his eyes. "When you confessed your love to me…"
Souma's heart began accelerating its heart beat at her words. Was she going to make fun of him? He really hoped not, now wasn't the time.
"I'm sorry for my rude answer to you." Her face showed him that she was indeed telling the truth. Her left hand lifted from the bottom of the table and rested on his hand.
Her skin was soft, like light pink rose petals kissing your cheek in spring. How he had longed for that touch so many years ago, every night and every day… but no. He didn't move his hand from underneath hers, and his gaze was strong. He couldn't say anything to her, because he didn't know what reply to give her. Should he say that it was okay? No, because it wasn't okay! He had gone home to heal a wounded heart! A heart that still needed time to be mended…
"I see what a big mistake I've made and I regret for everything I did that night." Her lavender eyes were filling up with tears. They were becoming pools of unshed tears.
"Don't cry," was all he could say. He didn't like to see girls cry, especially if he had big feelings for them. "Himeko-chan, I-I-…" what could he say?
"It's okay, you don't have to tell me anything. I just want you to hear me out, please." She squeezed his hand lightly and gave him a pleading look. "I feel awful for doing what I did to you and if I could take it back, I would. I never knew that the journey I decided to take was going to be so long! I-I-" Her voice shook a bit as it wanted to break, but she couldn't start crying right now! No, she wanted to explain to him and see if she could understand her own feelings as well. "I have to lay awake every night in my bed thinking about you a-a-and about her! The girl from the street! Thinking of who I want, who I belong to and I always end up in tears because my heart is always alone. I can't get the picture of me rejecting you out of my head and I can't get her face out, either."
Souma listened carefully and intently at the love of his life talk. It hurt him just sitting there and watching her cry because she couldn't find the love of her life. "Himeko-chan, please don't cry. Please."
"Souma-kun! I want to say I love you to you, but I can't! I want you to be my one true love, but deep in my heart I know you're not. Why can't it be you? Why does it have to be someone I don't know and that I've only seen once in my life? WHY?" At the end, her voice broke and a sob escaped her. She covered her face with both her hands and turned away from him and the people staring at them.
He didn't know this was going to happen. If he had known, he would have taken her to his house where she didn't have to worry about people looking at her or being nosey.
"I want to love you, Souma-kun, I really do." She stared up at him through her fingers and tried to blink away tears, but it was no use because more drops continued to leak out.
This was too much; Souma got up from the booth and slid alongside Himeko and gathered her up in his arms. Breathing in her vanilla scent made his heart beat faster and his hold on her tighten. How he'd wanted to do this for such a long time. Touching her silky smooth skin and running his fingers lightly across the top of her hand as her breathing slowly decelerated. This was heaven, right? Here he was holding the girl of his dreams yet he knew that he wasn't the one for her. It was a thorn in his heart, and it killed him to know that the person who she loved was none other than another girl.
"It's okay," he whispered against her ear, brushing a few strands of her golden blonde hair away. "It's okay if you can't love me. I know I'm not the one for you and it saddens me to know that, but all I want is to see a smile on your beautiful face. Please, don't cry, I can't stand to see you cry. It pains me, really it does."
His voice was sincere and she could tell from his tone and the way he was staring at her with his amber colored eyes. If she were in love with him, she was sure her heart would flutter and she'd close the distance and capture his lips with hers. Sadly, her heart belonged to another and it was something she desperately wanted to change but couldn't. Her destiny was already set to love and be loved by the girl in her dreams.
"I really want to love you, I love-"
Souma didn't let her finish as he crashed his lips with hers in a gentle kiss. Himeko's plum colored eyes widened before slowly closing and letting the sweet feeling try and sink in.
The feel of his lips against hers soothed her in a way she had never felt before. The knot in both her chest and throat was slowly diminishing and her arms were moving to wrap themselves around him. She needed him, but not in the way she wanted to need him. His peppermint scent was intoxicating and she wanted more…
"Excuse me? Um, you can't be doing this in a public place."
Souma pulled away, but before completely backing off he looked deep into Himeko's amethyst eyes, and slowly got up from the seat.
"Sorry about that, we just had a moment." He gave the waitress an apologetic look before going back to his seat.
The waitress nodded before casting a glance to Himeko, who had puffy eyes. She smiled at the solar priestess and turned to walk away.
Himeko blushed and felt as the heat spread from her neck to her cheeks and back down to her neck. She'd just made out with Souma and she had actually felt something for him.
"I'll be here for you, Himeko-chan." Souma's coffee gaze was strong yet kind and Himeko liked that. She nodded and gave him a small smile. All he wanted to do was never see her sad again, because Himeko should never have to frown. Sure she had broken his heart in the past but he was sure she was willing to be with him, even if he wasn't for her. And perhaps, in the future his heart would be broken once more but he didn't care. He would be with her during the time that the other person wasn't, and deep down something told him that if he was lucky, he could be the new person in Himeko's heart.
"Thank you, Souma-kun." She placed her hand over his once more and squeezed lightly. She didn't know when she would meet the person she was destined for, but she was sure that Souma would be with her until that time. The feeling she'd felt when he had kissed her was hope that maybe; just maybe, the person destined for her could change…