A/N:
I wonder what Peter and Edmund would think if they could see all the
slash around here. :) Reviews are nice. Don't get offended, I don't
think many people actually believe our dear Pevensies are capable of
doing what most slash makes them.
HOL - Heaven OnLine:
Unlimited Fanfiction of all Sorts . net
"What is it, bro?" asked Ed, coming up behind him.
"I—I—I think I'm having a nightmare."
Ed happily pinched Peter in a very painful way. Peter yowled in pain and swatted at his brother.
"Nope, you're not dreaming," Ed informed him. Peter glared.
"Well, if I'm not dreaming, then certainly this connection is messed up."
Ed checked the "Everything Shown Is What's Really There" button on the modem. "Nope, it's really there, Pete."
Peter moaned and threw himself against the heavenly computer seat he was sitting in. "Then the world must be mad!" he cried despairingly.
"What's new about that?"
"You aren't encouraging me."
"I'm sorry. So what are you whining about?"
Peter speechlessly pointed at the monitor. His finger shook with terror.
Edmund leaned closer. "Hey! Lots of stories about us!" Excitedly he clicked the story with his and Peter's name in the summery and began to read. Very soon he left to empty his lunch in the bathroom. When he had recovered himself relatively well he stumbled back into the computer room, looking pale and green and red at intervals. "That—that—"
"That, my brother," Peter said forlornly, "is on a site for fanfiction. And half of it is like that. Some of it…is worse."
Edmund cried, "WHO THE HECK WOULD WANT ME TO BE IN LOVE WITH YOU! You're not even pretty!"
"Thank you," said Peter dryly.
"You're welcome. How does it get worse?"
"They do it to Sue and Lucy too. And I'm in love with about fifty 'beautiful beauties' that range from scared and fragile and in need of my heroism to hypnotizing angels who make me forget who I am and turn into a zombie to independent, disgustingly modern girls who might as well be men."
"I—I—they didn't make me—did they?" Edmund said weakly.
"I'm afraid so. Yours are pretty much the same, though not as numerous as mine."
"Lucy? Susan?"
"Lucy's married to Mr. Tumnus and Sue… well, she's in love with me, apparently." Edmund left to gag again. Peter called after him, "Oh! And sometimes Lucy and you have some disgusting romance!"
When Edmund, feeling quite weak came back, he was muttering, "What has the world come to?" over and over. He shuddered, thinking of all the horrid ideas that had been presented.
"It seems," said Peter, thoughtfully, "that in order for a story to be good it must have romance, and some people will go to any extent to get that." He shuddered a little and muttered, "Does no one realize that there's more in the world than romance—especially this sort?"
Edmund ventured to look over Peter's shoulder again. "They spelled my name wrong! And what does L-I-E-K O-M-G HOT mean?"
"I don't want to know," Peter said.
Just then Lucy entered their heavenly office. "Yo, boys. What'cha doing?"
Quickly Peter turned off the computer, fearing that the site would seriously damage his sister. "Just looking at some current events."
"More like current trash," muttered Edmund. Lucy seemed not to notice and invited them to go with her and Aslan and some others on a picnic. They readily agreed, eager to forget the disturbing site they had seen.