A Soldier's Letter
A Story by Kimberly C.
[Rewritten 5 January, 2010]

--

" Excuse me, ma'am, but is this the residence of Private Crash Bandicoot?"

The young marsupial glanced at the man before her cautiously, furrowing her brows as she nodded, "Can I help you, sir?"

From his appearance, Coco knew that something was wrong, and she tried in vain to ignore her knotting stomach. His dark suit had been tailored to appear as if it had been perfected under an artist's pen, matching the sharp features of his face to complete his professional look. A nauseating tug pulled at her stomach when his choreographed voice continued, "Ms. Bandicoot, I'm Lieutenant Bradley of the Australian brigade, post 112. Could I speak with you for a moment, ma'am?"

Though her heart was skeptic, she again bobbled her head, gulping as she stepped from the door to allow him passage, "O-of course. Please, make yourself at home, Lieutenant."

-----

"And what makes you believe this is necessary?"

Crash Bandicoot paused, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation, as he glance over his shoulder towards his younger sibling, "How many times to I have to explain this to you, Coco?" Sighing, he shook his head before turning to face her. "Dr. Cortex has an unfair advantage over the country, and I'm the only one that can stop him… I need to make things right-"

"And how is fighting in this war going to do that!?" A burning confusion sweltered in her eyes as she took his arm into her grasp, "Big brother, you've done nothing wrong to make-"

"That's not the point…" The male bandicoot swiped his hand over his tired eyes, musing to himself for only a moment before he felt his sister's gentle tug upon his arm. "Coco, I can't just sit out and watch all of these innocent people die." He waved a hand over the sea of soldiers before them, all saying their goodbyes as he was, "I promise you, I will be fine." A flash of his pearly whites, and easily prying her fingers from his sleeve, he had began to reach for his gear nestled by his feet…

But Coco couldn't watch as her only sibling retreated to his own march of death; her sudden sob caught his attention once more as halted, looking up to her now trembling figure. She couldn't return his gaze, her eyes set on his polished boots as she allowed her heart to take control, "…I can't believe you." Wiping a stray tear from her cheek, she continued, "What about Riley? She needs you, Crash- you're all she has left. Are you just going to walk away like-" Coco bit her tongue hard, her hand quickly finding its place over her mouth in an attempt to cover her mistake…

… But the blow had already been struck. Crash stood in silence for a moment, his posture now erect as he murmured a small, "H-how could you?" Knuckles tightened at his side, the soldier's brows were soon pinched together, an angry growl in his words as he struggled to keep his temper in check, "I'm nothing like Eliza. I love my Riley unconditionally, and I would never dream of leaving her like her mother."

"Then why are you doing it now?!" Despite her body's best attempt to buckle under the emotional strain it was under, Coco managed to stay on her feet. She was well aware that she was stepping over imaginary boundaries, but if talking of the woman that abandoned him only a year ago would keep him from boarding the train that would deliver him to his demise, she was willing to destroy those said lines.

Her brother only continued to shower her in a cold stare as he argued, "I'm not 'abandoning' her! Do you have any idea how hard it is having to not only worry about those you love, but all of those that are in impeccable danger?" Crash's voice wavered for a moment, before growing even louder, "You've never had to save the world alone, putting your own neck on the line for complete strangers who aren't even thankful, and on occasions, having your ass handed to you by some deranged psychopath. You've never had to do any of that. You've never had to worry about failing and utterly screwing over your fellow inhabitants of this big, round globe. YOU'VE never had the weight of the world thrown onto your shoulders and been expected to watch over it so that everyone else can live their lives peacefully." At this point, he was shaking at the damage she had done to him, gritting his teeth as he ended his rant, "I've never had the opportunity to live anything near a normal life like you, Coco, so don't you dare tell me that I'm ditching my family, when I'm actually trying to protect you and the rest of Australia, got it?"

Coco instinctively sinked back, shell-shock cascading over her as she desperately tried to hold herself in. She had always known that Crash's temper was something he always tried to keep in check, but now he stood before her, his anger raw like a savage beast's, hurt and betrayed by his own flesh and blood's attack.

It was too much for her fragile heart to withstand, and she cupped her hands over her face in defeat.

Only when he heard his sister's unsteady cry did his boiling rage suddenly cool, the world around him settling once more as he realized what had been done. Jade eyes wide with an unlikable shame, he helplessly watched Coco's small frame as she fell to her knees before stammering, "Coco, oh God, Coco, I'm sorry. I-"

Tears continued to spill from her distressed eyes, looking at her now bewildered brother with guilt as she gently spoke, "No, you're not the one who should be apologizing."

The pain in her heart continued to ache, especially when he crouched to meet her stature; his arms found their way around her, and she greedily fell into his chest as he whispered, "I'm so sorry, Coco… You didn't deserve any of that, dear. You're such a good girl, and you've helped me out so much more than what you realize back when Cortex's plans were on a smaller scale." Crash pulled her closer, curling his fingers into her golden hair as his voice began to break, "Don't believe a word I said; you know how my anger gets the best of me at times."

That was true, but Coco couldn't shut away the tears, burrowing herself further into the neatly-pressed uniform that clashed against the sibling she loved so much, "I'll miss you, big brother."

"Believe me, I'll miss you too, sis." A shudder overwhelmed his body as he choked on the sob he had diligently tried to hide. "Besides Riley, you're my life- do you have any idea how screwed I would be if you hadn't came through for me at the last minute?" He laughed at his nostalgic memories, "We would all be mindless drones if you hadn't of warned me of Cortex's reconstruction of the Cortex Vortex, and I, for one, wouldn't have been a happy camper about that."

At this, the young woman couldn't help but giggle. It brought a small smile to his face as he pulled away from her, just to meet her moist, emerald eyes, "You're the best sister any brother could ever ask for. Don't let anyone tell you different, either. And, sis, please take good care of my baby girl while I'm away… I promise I won't be long."

"Daddy, wait!"

Upon hearing the shrill, the two pulled away from each other, Crash's grin falling into horror as they craned their necks towards the quickly-approaching sound of footsteps. When the child finally stopped before them, she sent her father a pleading glance. "Daddy, please don't go."

His new found frown deepened, "Riley, I-" He paused, "Where is your 'uncle' Mansen?" Crash could only cringe at the reference to her sister's boyfriend being of any relation to his daughter, but she had quickly dubbed him to be such.

Riley replied, "I ditched him. Sorry…" The seven-year-old then threw herself into Crash, the tears she had forced herself into holding overtaking her. "I don't want you to go! Please, daddy, please say you'll stay."

"Riley, I-" He stopped; nothing about fatherhood had prepared him for such a feat, so he softly kissed her forehead, " I love you, Riley You know that, right?"

She skeptically pulled herself from his chest, a small tear caressing her cheek as she whimpered, "Yes, daddy. You don't go a day without telling me." She paused, "So, who's going to tell me they love me if you're not there?"

That brought a glimmer of a smile to his lips as he wiped the falling tear away with his thumb, "Riley, you shouldn't need me to have to remind you that I love you- there will never be a day that I don't love my little one."

The little red-head returned his grin, sniffling before replying with a child-like wonder, "Really?"

"Of course!" Crash drew her against him once again, ruffling her hair as he continued, "Nobody can ever take your place in my life, sweetheart."

"You promise?"

"With all my heart."

The tyke kissed her father on the cheek, a happy grin of young ignorance on her face as she unbecomingly brought the world against his shoulders harder, "Will you be home soon? Uncle Mansen bought me a new storybook called "Goldilocks and the Three Bears", and nobody else can read it to me but you."

Crash's grin faltered, but he refused to let it collapse in front of Riley. "I'll try my best to be home as soon as possible."

---

And, that was it- like a leaf in the wind, he was gone, on his way to battle in a war that held near impossible odds. The promise Crash made to his little girl still lingered in her head and Coco had always learned from him to keep a breath of hope even in the bleakest moments…

However, the Lieutenant that now walked alongside her made her have her doubts. The two stepped into the heart of the home, and she gestured towards the plush seats around them, "Please, sit down."

"Thank you,." A nod of gratitude came from Bradley as he made his way to the invited seats, scanning the pictures along the walls that reminisced the life of the private. He stopped for a moment, his gaze caught by the large family picture accenting the room; all grins were widely spread across each faces, and he quickly spotting the head of the family, Crash, within the crowd. The Lieutenant had heard countless tales of the young child the bandicoot held on his hip, but failed to recall anything about the woman his arm was wrapped around.

"… They used to be such a happy family." Coco spoke softly as she found her place beside of him. He glanced momentarily to her, then back to the picture as she continued, "I doubt I've ever saw my older brother smile as wide as he did in this picture. Needless to say, he was content with his little family."

He knew that it was against his code to mingle himself with the families of other soldiers, but his mind delved for more information. Before he could think of his regulations, Bradley's mortal curiosity took control, "May I ask what happened, Ma'am?"

She weakly smiled, "Please, you can call me Coco." She then brought her eyes to the slender woman in the picture, "To be truthful, I don't know. She just packed her things and left one day, never to return." Coco shook her head distastefully, "She didn't even say goodbye to Riley."

"The child?"

Lieutenant Bradley had heard the tales that Private Bandicoot spun around the fire of his only child, his pride and joy. She was all that he ever wanted to speak about, and along with the other soldiers of their battalion, he eagerly listened to each. Hearing such stories took them away from the harsh world they had inhabited at the time, and brought them back to the thoughts of their own families.

"Aunt Coco?" The army man's stomach plummeted at the gentle voice behind them, and he turned to see the girl in the portrait. Her smile faded softly as she studied him curiously, "Do you know my daddy? He's got an outfit just like yours."

Lieutenant Bradley felt his heart swelter as met Riley's innocent gaze, "Your father was a good man, and you're the only thing he wanted to talk about to us, dear." He patted her head, then sharply turned back to Coco, his voice almost in a whisper as he reached into his uniform pocket, "I came to give a letter written by your brother before the battle of Sydney." He paused, extending the damaged envelope to her before murmuring, "It was part of his final wishes that I bring it to you."

"No," Everything seemed to dim as Coco took the offered parchment, it shaking violently in her hands as her words fell heavily from her lips, "… My brother's dead?"

" Y- yes," His auburn gaze finally upon her again, "I'm very sorry for your lost ma'- Coco. Your brother was a man with one of the most golden hearts I had ever seen. He was a fine addition to our brigade, and a man who would take a bullet for any of his comrades. I'm afraid that's what happened to him, though, as he was caught in the Sidney Ambush along with the rest of his post, and sacrificed himself for another wounded soldier." He cleared his throat to rid himself of his own swelling tears, "When the battle was over, and as the medical team fought against fate for him, he told me of the letter, and begged that I hand-deliver it to you for him."

"I-is that…" Her eyes wide with fear, Coco gestured towards the crimson splotch across the top of the envelope.

Almost helplessly, Bradley nodded, "Yes, it is."

Riley threw her hands into her face, screaming through her fingers, "Daddy's coming back! He promised me that he would come read to be as soon as he was back!" She whimpered as she collapsed to the ground in a fit of tears, making Bradley loathe himself even more for doing his job. "He'll be home. I know it, I-"

"Riley," It was clear that the young woman was fumbling at holding herself together, but she tried her best despite the raging sea of emotions within her to stay strong for her niece as she cooed, "Please, child. Let Aunt Coco read what your daddy wrote her."Without another word, she opened the blood-stained letter, glancing once more to the Lieutenant as her eyes began to water:

Coco,

I would have wrote you sooner, but things have been pretty hectic where I'm at right now. How are things back home, and how are you? Is Riley doing okay? She's all I've been thinking- and talking- about to the guys, and she's unknowingly helped all of us get away from the whole concept of war through my stories. Will you tell her that I love her, miss her, and that I'll be home to read her now not-so-new storybook to her soon?

At least, I hope. I'm not going to lie, things aren't looking their brightest at the moment; each brigade, including our own, has already lost hundreds of men to Cortex, and the same pertains to the vice versa. His army is a lot more stronger than what I would've ever perceived them to be, and they're using some pretty ingenious tactics to get at us. Needless to say, he may have the upper hand on us right now, and, well… I'm actually scared.

Coco stopped, glancing blankly at the words that began to merge across the paper. Her brother was scared? Crash Bandicoot, who was able to defeat this same man and his armies of minions countless times before was now afraid of those very people? The thought ran violently through her, making her want to end the letter at that spot, but her mind refused to do such as her words came back into focus:

It's the cowardly thing to say, but now I wish that I would've let you talked me out of leaving at the train station. The things I've seen- the things I've had to do- they're going to haunt me 'til my dying days. I knew the world was a wicked place, but only when I witnessed it for myself, an innocent man begging for his sister's life as they were both struck down by the commanding officer of Cortex's army, did that reality finally sink in.

To be honest, seeing how persistent that civilian was to protect his sibling only made me think of you that much more.

Cortex is a horribly twisted being that's feeding off of this violence, and I'm scared at how much he's actually accomplished. We've pushed him back, and we're slowly gaining our ground against him each day, but we're losing that many more men in that same time. I'm sick of watching this slaughter ensue, but what am I to do? I'm stuck having to watch it, and commit it, for now.

Coco, I don't want to dampen your spirits, but I wouldn't count on me coming home any time soon, if at all. For right now, it's strictly out of the question, because even if I was granted the opportunity to come home, I would probably decline [and you know my reasoning on that subject]. I love you, sis, and I can never thank you enough for being with me through the thick and thin, even when I've not returned the gesture… For all that I've ever done that's hurt you, especially when my temper got the best of me at the station, I'm sorry.

As much as I'd love it to, that word just doesn't do the situation justice; words can't express how grateful I am for a sister like you, and how I wish that I had been a better brother. If I make it home, I can assure you that I will compensate for all the time that Cortex has managed to steal from me thought-out all of these years.

And the same goes for my Riley. I've really missed our crazy father-daughter antics the most… Putting her in such a position was stupid of me, because, let's face it: if it hadn't of been for her, I would've already been long gone, especially after going through the Hell that Eliza sent me into. I love that little girl beyond words, and I miss her so much. I ask that you please tell her that for me (I'm nowhere near a phone at the moment, and I won't be for a while, or else I would personally tell her myself).

She's growing up on me, and I've missed out on 11 months of it. Her birthday's coming up as well, so please wrap her in the largest hug you can muster, give her a kiss on the cheek, and tell her it's from her dear ol' dad, too.

I'm sorry for this whole mess. As always, I didn't this through like I should've, instead 'leaping into it with my eyes closed' as one of the older gents in the post so pleasantly put it. I promise to you that, if at all possible, I'll be home soon. Again, I'm sorry, and I love you both unconditionally- Never forget that. I swear to you…

Coco blinked, roughly smudging a rolling tear from her eye as she whimpered softly, "What happened to the rest of the note?"

The Lieutenant's head lowered, "He was called to duty before he was granted that opportunity. Like he did with all his letters to you, he put it in an envelope and carried it with him in the battle…" There was a long pause as he unconsciously twiddled his thumbs together, looking up to meet her tearful gaze. "Only, he never returned to his base to finish it like the other times."

"Daddy," Since the silence had taken the room earlier, Riley had hid herself from the two adults, her form wrapped within itself on one of the plush seats surrounding them as she cried. She coughed back a heavy sob, lifting her forehead from against her knees as she brought her father's eyes unto Bradley, "H-he's not coming back?"

Upon catching the solemn stare of the young girl did the Lieutenant halt, his own as wide when he suddenly saw her father's face within her own. He hesitated before finally forcing a step forward, "… No, dear." He helplessly looked at Coco before turning back to her, new tears streaming down her cheeks, "I'm so sorry." He mused for a moment before his mind clicked upon another great importance. "I have something for you, though." Pulling the neatly-pressed coat away from his chest, he scouted a small tape from within the inside pocket. Bradley held his hand, and the tape out to Riley, sympathetically flashing a small smile as she took it from his palm. "He wanted me to give you this as well."

As Riley wiped her eyes with one hand, she studied the small cassette in the other hand woefully, slowly reading aloud what was quickly scribbled along with label, "To my little one. Play this when you go to sleep, Riley. I hope you'll like it. Love, Daddy." She sniffed, meeting Bradley's tiny grin with one of her own, "Thank you, mister."

-----

Coco could still hear the tape spindles wind, along with her older brother's voice as she sat outside her niece's bedroom door, a tear conflicting the grin upon her face. She couldn't help but giggle along with his silly performance of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" as she imagined Crash acting his part before a sea of army men, whose voices surprisingly made cameos as other characters in the story. She could hear Riley squealing in delight behind the door at her father's mock-female voice, a laugh that did not die down until she heard her father's sentiments at the end of the tape:

"Hopefully you enjoyed your story, little one. I had a lot of help telling it, as you probably could tell. Can you imagine that a bunch of daddy's big, macho friends just acted like little kids for you? Let's hear it, guys!"

Coco could not help but raise her brow at the amount of laughter and cheers she heard among the men, surprised that such an act of storytelling occurred as she heard her own brother's laughter among the mix. "I've talked a lot about you to these guys. You're a star out here, Riley. But, I have to go, dear; I promise to you that I'll try my best to be home soon, to act out your storybook in person, to tuck you in, and to continue telling you that I love you everyday like before. Goodnight, sweetheart, I love you so much."

It was then that the tape clicked, signifying that the ending of Crash's tale had sent the home into silence once more.