AT THE SPEED OF SOUND
NOTES: So here we are again…. I just saw Whisper of the Heart (Mimi o Summaseba) and I can't get over it. I haven't even finished my story for Ame-chan. Gomene, Amelia.
I do not own any rights to Aoi-san's original manga, or Studio Ghibli's production on the silverscreen. This is the cutest manga ever and if you can, you should read it.
The story is forming in my head, and has been doing so all day, faster than I can remember it! So, to get it down before it slips away and the fancy leaves me, I need to do this…. Oh, and a special thanks to NitohRyu for being my Amasawa Seiji-kun and my muse for this story. Albeit, inadvertently….
I apologize in advance if this reads like a shoujo manga…it was fully intentional. --Kero. (5/20/06)
p.s. SPECIAL THANKS TO SAKURA SISTA FOR CREATING A SPACE FOR THESE STORIES! (6/17/06)
Chapter 1: Memories in a Box
"Shizuku! Ohayou! Shizuku! Ohayou! Shizuku! Oha—" CLICK. Her hand lazily slipped from the 'snooze' button on her alarm clock and back over the side of her queen sized bed. As she pushed herself over onto her back, a giant yawn escaped her mouth. With her light cotton pajama sleeve, she wiped off the remnants of drool that had stuck to the side of her face. Shizuku's eyes fluttered open. The room was brightened by the morning sun's rays penetrating through the white linen drapes of her Tokyo apartment. Shizuku had to squint to adjust from the almost blinding light of the day world, just as she was forgetting the stories that had woven together in her dreams in the night world. Stretching until she heard that familiar cracking noise in her neck and back, she then looked around her room.
"That's right," she said to no one in particular. "It's Saturday. I have to meet Kuroda-san downtown today." She glanced over to her writing desk, piled high with loose papers all over her laptop, old half drunk cups of coffee, newspaper clippings and thick hard covered books. There, in the center of all that chaos was her latest completed fictional manuscript, lying quietly in a manila envelope, waiting to be delivered to her ever eager publishing agent, Kuroda Mamoru at Kodansha Publications. He would have a fit if she didn't meet him on time in the lobby of the Lotus Hotel by noon. The prior weekend, Kuroda-san had warned her not to be late because afterwards, he had scheduled a meeting with the publication higher-ups to discuss their fall season releases into bookstores.
"Idiot," she sighed. "He's just asking for it, since I'm never on time." Shizuku rolled herself out of bed and onto her hardwood floor of her apartment, landing on all fours like a cat. She wasn't used to the fancy contemporary set-up of the apartment yet, and she still slightly missed the tatami mats back home in her old room in her parents' flat. How long ago had it been since she went back? Sure, she'd call and check up on them on a bi-weekly basis, but she hadn't visited her old town in a while. It had been two years since she graduated from university, majoring in poetry and classical literature. Since then, she had done some free lance writing for her local newspaper until Kodansha wanted her to write for them exclusively, having read her first finished novel. She edited, revised and finally published a year before her graduation, "Whisper of the Heart."
Shizuku pulled the toothbrush out of the holder on the wall and spread a colorful swirl of toothpaste onto the bristles. As she brushed her teeth and absently stared into the mirror in front of her in her nicely tiled bathroom of sea green and blue, she glanced through the looking glass at the box lying on the floor behind her. The package came a few days ago in the mail from an old friend. In it was something that she always wanted but could never have enough money to buy. It was so carefully packaged that Shizuku slowly unwrapped it for nearly half an hour. A few months earlier, Grandpa Nishi had finally called it quits on the antique shop and went to live with his family. He only took a few things with him, selling off or giving the rest of the antiques away; and to Shizuku he bestowed The Baron.
She hadn't the courage to take it out of the box yet, though she was very excited to receive the package and undo the layers upon layers of bubble wrap. After that, she hesitated because somehow, she felt as though taking out the ceramic cat doll would undo all the enchantment of her apartment, and her world, and Shizuku would see her life now as nothing but a shadow of what she really wanted. Baron Humbert von Gikkenden always had that effect. He always had a way of making her feel more and want more than what she had now. For two years now, Shizuku had convinced herself that her life now was the best for her. She was not about to let The Baron break that spell.
Shizuku spit out the toothpaste, gargled with her cobalt blue plastic tumbler and reached for a clean white towel, hanging to her right. She deliberately looked away from the box. To quell the silence, Shizuku hummed to herself a tuneless song. Without her knowing it, the song began to take shape into something with form and substance.
From nowhere, out of the depths of time and dusty memory, a familiar song stained her lips.
"Country
road
I want to stay as I was yesterday
But I can't go back
I
won't return
Fare thee well, country road."
When she realized what she was singing she suddenly stopped. It was true. She deliberately avoided going back home because it brought back uncomfortable memories. He was not there and Shizuku could not return. She had to go forward now, without those memories.
She hurried and changed into her clothes, a summer skirt with a fragile pattern, and a white sweater over a peach tank top. Slipping on her sandals, and grabbing her white hat from the coat rack, she hastily closed the door to her apartment, those unwanted memories, and The Baron.
"Shizuku-san!" said Kuroda-san jovially as he beamed at her in the hotel lobby, looked down at his Rolex wristwatch, and continued to beam at her. Shizuku looked up at the giant glass clock hanging on the wall of the main lobby of Lotus Hotel and realized that she was exactly on time. In her rush to be away from her apartment, she had actually sprinted to the subway and made her first punctual entrance in a long time. She absently handed Kuroda her manuscript and sighed. This would be the last story for a while, being the last of a short fictional series about magic and mythical lands that had given her some degree of fame among young adult readers. Kodansha had even given her series a website and it continued to fill with fan mail and message blogs, carefully screened by Kodansha junior-staff for creeps and obssessors, ever since the second book was released a few years back. It was somewhat of a sleeper hit for Kodansha, as they expectations for the releases that year were set primarily on their more seasoned authors. Hence, Kuroda-san's enthusiasm as his eyes gleamed over the hastily read pages of her new and final manuscript for this series.
"It's excellent, Shizuku-san! It really is. You've outdone yourself. It seems you've taken this dark period you've been in for the last two years and transformed it into a soulful manuscript." He carefully moved his coffee cup away from the precious object in his hand. Shizuku continued to sip her latte and blankly stared out the window. She couldn't seem to get past her reflection, however, to really look at the world outside.
"It's a bit trite and tied up too neatly at the end, don't you think? It's like I had to force a happy ending. I don't think I wrote down what I was truly feeling, the purity I wanted to put down on paper. Really, the last two weeks, I was tempted to just kill off the heroine in one dramatic swoop…" she said divertingly.
"That's so mean, Shizuku-san! Your heroine is one of my favorites, and I'm sure your fans would agree when they read the final version that they are glad you didn't kill her," smiled Kuroda. He looked up at her thoughtfully.
"Why don't I take you out to dinner this evening? You seem a little out of sorts. Did you not sleep well? Did your cat keep you up?"
"No. And I don't have a cat," said Shizuku. "You're thinking about that other writer. The tall, quiet, good looking one." She sighed. For a moment the image of the Baron crossed her mind. She shook him out of her thoughts but instead, the image transformed into a large, round white cat as big as the moon. She would have liked to have a cat like him, no matter how grumpy.
"Ah, sorry! That's right, she keeps a cat. My bad," he smiled bashfully. "You keep a…goldfish?" he asked tentatively.
"Dead," responded Shizuku.
"Ah, well…It's not like you to look so glum, Shizuku-san. Is there something I can do?" he asked gently.
"It's okay, Kuroda-san. It's just a little funk I've fallen into. It's starting up more often now, and lasts a bit longer each time. Maybe I just need to clean up my apartment…get rid of a few things…" she answered softly.
"Writers are always thoughtful people, Shizuku-san. But don't let your thoughts carry you away to unwanted places. Focus on your today, and you should be fine." Shizuku smiled at his handsome face. His eyes were bright but it was too bad that his chain smoking yellowed his teeth. Of course, he would smoke more than usual when it came close to deadlines, so it was partially her fault. Shizuku was one of five writers Kuroda-san was personally in charge of. Still, it seemed like he paid most attention to her work and was a self-proclaimed fan. Still unmarried, many of the staff at the publishing company thought him rather the eligible bachelor, but for Shizuku, he was just a friend.
But was there something in his expression that was different than usual? Shizuku was never good at realizing anyone's affections for her. However, judging by the way he looked at her now, she could take a good guess that he was enamored of her--even if he really was enamored with her fictional characters, and this affection transposed itself onto her person. Still, he was certainly someone she could make herself fall in love with. Shizuku laughed in spite of herself.
"What's so funny?" asked Kuroda-san, rather puzzled. But before she could invent an answer, her cell phone rang.
"Oh, excuse me," she apologized as she pulled her silver Motorola RZR with a little lucky cat charm dangling on the side from her purse. "Hello. This is Shizuku."
"Shizuku, this is Yoko. Are you free? I'm in Shinjuku district right now at Studio B. Do you want to come over? My lyricist bailed on me and I really need some help with this theme song I'm developing for a new show. Wanna try your hand?" her childhood friend asked.
"I've given up writing song lyrics since Concrete Roads, Yuko. I write stories, not songs," she replied.
"Please, Shizuku. Thanks a bundle; I'm counting on you!" Her friend hung up on her before Shizuku could get in another word edgewise.
"Damnit, Yuko," grumbled Shizuku.
"Problem?" asked Kuroda-san.
"Yeah. I have to be somewhere else, right now." Shizuku got up to leave but Kuroda-san caught her hand in his.
"Shizuku…" he said shyly, "I would really like it if you would join me for dinner sometime."
She smiled back at him. I could do a whole lot worse than him…she thought to herself. "Okay." She could hardly believe she accepted. This could be the start of something…. Deep down, her heart was whispering for her not to, but Shizuku intentionally ignored it.