This is my first Gilmore Girls fic, so please be nice. I'm obsessed with the show, and I absolutely adore Rory and Logan. I cried when he left for London, which is where this story picks up. I hope you enjoy, I've put a lot of effort into this story.

-

Rory was awake, but afraid to open her eyes. She knew what she would find, and was afraid to look. She instinctively reached out, but her hand felt nothing but emptiness. Sad, cold, lonely emptiness. Sighing, Rory opened her eyes which fell on the sight she had been afraid to see. The aforementioned emptiness. There was no blonde-haired wonder boy lying next to her. She rubbed her puffy, red eyes and sniffled. Glancing at the clock, she mentally registered twenty-four hours. It had been twenty-four full hours since she'd last seen Logan. Twenty-four hours since she'd kissed him or simply touched him. God, what she would give to just touch him right now. He'd called when his flight landed in Heathrow, but he was tired and she was still crying, ergo making it a short conversation. She hadn't quite stopped crying since he'd left, except for the short breaks in which she would sleep. She was wallowing. Rory hated herself for doing it, but she couldn't help it. It hurt too much to do anything else. Her phone had rung a few times, but after checking the caller ID to make sure it wasn't him, she simply let it ring.

Rory could feel new tears forming. She didn't even bother to try and hold them back. It was useless by now. Grabbing a handful of tissues off of the nightstand, she blew her nose and sniffled. Suddenly there was a knock at the door, startling her. Her heart jumped at the prospect of it being Logan, but she immediately pushed that thought out of her mind and heart. It wasn't him.

"Rory! Rory Gilmore, I know you're in there. Open the door pronto. Right now," came the demanding voice of one Lorelai Gilmore. "Mommy's here! Be happy!" The last bit came out in a sing-song voice.

Rory forced herself out of the bed and stumbled towards the door. She slowly opened it, looking anything but happy. Lorelai frowned as she entered the apartment, quickly setting down a bag she was carrying and engulfing her daughter in a hug.

"Oh, Kid," she consoled.

Rory felt more tears roll down her cheeks and fall onto her mother's shoulder. "He's gone," Rory managed to mumble through sniffles.

"Come on," Lorelai said, gently leading her daughter towards the bed and plopping down on it next to her. She grinned and placed the brown paper grocery bag between them. "I brought wallowing food."

"Wallowing food?" Rory questioned; tears having temporarily subsided.

"Yes." Lorelai began to reveal the contents of the bag. "Chocolate frosting, chocolate-chip cookie dough, Doritos, pop-tarts, Malamars, and chocolate-chip-chunk muffins." Lorelai explained everything with a big grin on her face and shoved a large chocolate-chip-chunk muffin into Rory's hands. "Eat up."

Rory looked down at the muffin and gently picked a chunk of chocolate off the top and popped it into her mouth. "I like chocolate," she stated meekly through a sniffle as a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"Hun," Lorelai said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Rory shrugged. "There's not much to talk about. Logan's gone. He's thousands of miles away. He's in a different country…he's just gone."

"Rory, you're making it sound like he dropped off the face of the earth completely. He's in London, not on Pluto," Lorelai reasoned, taking out a muffin for herself.

Rory took a small bite out of her own muffin. "He wouldn't even let me go to the airport with him," she explained. Lorelai flashed her daughter a quizzical look. "He-he said that if I went with him, he wouldn't be able to get on the plane." Lorelai's face saddened and she pulled Rory in for another hug. "I miss him so much, Mom," Rory choked out through a new onset of tears. "It's barely been a day and I just…I don't know what to do. I want him to come back. I try to be so strong…a-and usually I'm pretty good at it, y'know? But not when it comes to Logan."

"Kid," Lorelai said as they parted. She pushed a lock of hair behind Rory's left ear. "I know this might not be what you want to hear right now, but it will get easier. I know it doesn't seem that way right now because the pain's fresh, but there will come a day in the not too-distant future where you won't have to cry. I'm not saying you'll stop missing him, but it will get easier. I promise."

"I know you're right," Rory agreed. "But I just don't see how that's possible right now. Right now it hurts just to think about him. I keep…I keep replaying conversations that we had over and over again in my mind. I keep trying to remember everything about him. Every line on his face when he smiles, the sound of his laugh…what it feels like to be in his arms…" Rory laid down again and curled up. Lorelai rubbed her back, trying desperately to console her devastated daughter. A few minutes later, the phone let out a shrill ring. Rory didn't seem to even notice, and Lorelai leaned over her to get it off the nightstand.

"Hello?" Lorelai asked, holding it up to her ear.

"Rory?" Came the familiar voice of Logan. Rory's name came out as more of a croak. Even in just saying Rory's name, Lorelai could tell that he was tired.

"No, it's Lorelai."

"Lorelai? Is Rory okay? Is she there?"

"No to the first, yes to the second."

By this time, Rory had rolled over to look at her mother. She had a hopeful look on her face. Lorelai mouthed the name 'Logan' to her daughter, and Rory immediately jumped, grabbing the phone from her mother.

"Can I talk to h–"

"Logan?" Rory asked excitedly.

"Hey, Ace, how are you holdin' up?"

Rory rubbed her teary eyes and sniffled slightly. She felt a little better just hearing his voice. "I'm alright," she lied.

"I know, I'm a wreck, too," Logan replied.

Rory smiled. "Don't go getting all mushy on me, Huntzberger."

"I won't if you won't," he compromised.

Rory momentarily weighed the options in her head. "I can't make any promises, so maybe just for a little bit." She could hear him grin on the other line, and settled back into the pillows as Lorelai removed herself from the bed and went over to the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee.

"So how are you really?" Logan prodded.

"You want the truth?"

"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God," Logan tried to joke.

Rory sighed before answering. "I'm a mess. I haven't left the apartment since you left. I went straight back to bed and have been crying off and on ever since. I didn't even get out of bed to make coffee. My mom finally came over this morning and is shoving chocolate muffins down my throat."

"Not even to make coffee?" Logan asked incredulously, trying to mask the pain it caused him to hear how Rory had really been holding up.

"Nope, not even to make coffee," she confirmed. "So how is London?"

"I wouldn't know, I've been in offices since I got here," Logan explained.

"Hence the tiredness."

"Yes, hence the tiredness. I haven't slept since I last saw you," Logan said sadly.

"I have a confession to make."

"Oh yeah, and what's that?"

"Since we're agreeing to be mushy this one time, I'll admit that I've been listening to Somewhere Only We Know."

"No, Ace, not the sad song!" He said in mock fear.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures," Rory stated.

"Oh simple thing, where have you gone?" Logan quoted the song.

"Logan, don't," Rory giggled.

"Did I just hear a laugh?" He asked.

"No…maybe," Rory confessed. Rory heard voices in the background on the other line, and Logan sighed.

"I hate to say this, Ace, but I've gotta get going," Logan said sadly.

Rory pouted, even though he couldn't see her. She couldn't help it. "Okay," she sighed.

"Call me before you go to bed, okay?"

"I will," Rory agreed.

"I love you, Rory. You know that, right?"

"I know," she responded quietly. "And I love you. I miss you. A lot."

"I miss you, too. Don't forget to call tonight."

"I could never forget to call you. Goodbye."

"Bye."

Rory pressed the 'End' button and put the phone back on the nightstand with a sigh. Lorelai came over with a hot mug of coffee and handed it to her.

"Thank you," Rory said gratefully as she sat up and took a sip.

"You okay?" Lorelai asked, sitting down next to her.

"No, but I'm getting there," Rory replied with a nod. "I think I'll be okay eventually."

"You'll see him soon," Lorelai reminded her, wrapping an arm around her daughter's slender shoulders.

"I know." Rory took another sip of her coffee and looked around the apartment. She placed her mug on the nightstand and grabbed Logan's pillow from his side of the bed. She hugged it and buried her face into the soft, feathery cushiness. Breathing deeply, she relaxed into the familiar scent of him. His cologne mixed with the light scent of shampoo. She loved that smell. It was comfort, it was home, it was Logan.

-

"Well yes, Doyle, I'll agree with you on that, but Cloud faced perilous dangers. I mean, he had an entire herd to take care of. Kids are hard, but it's just one kid."

"Leopard seals, Paris! Need I remind you of the leopard seals?" Doyle retaliated.

"No, Doyle, I remember the leopard seals. But Cloud had mountain lions, rival stallions, and mother nature to deal with," Paris reasoned.

"Mother nature? You wanna talk mother nature? Sub-zero temperatures!" Doyle took a moment to compose himself before continuing. "Dead baby penguins. Dead baby penguins!"

"Guys, guys, guys, can't we just agree that the Cloud documentary and the penguin movie were both good?" Rory tried to compromise.

"Rory, do not speak of the penguin movie if you have not watched the penguin movie," Doyle said in complete and utter seriousness.

"I've seen the…the penguin movie," Rory lied in her own defense.

"Oh yeah?" Paris jumped in. "The What of the Penguins?"

"What?" Rory asked in complete confusion.

"March!" Doyle shouted. "The March of the Penguins, Rory."

"Okay, I'm sorry, I haven't seen the penguin movie. But I'm sure it was excellent."

"Oh, it was. It was excellent," Doyle said passionately, causing Paris to roll her eyes and mumble something about Cloud.

Rory glanced down at her watch and practically jumped out of her seat. "Oh, crap! Is it really 1:30?" Paris and Doyle nodded. "Lunch was great you guys, but I really have to get back to work." After saying goodbye, Rory hurried out of the restaurant and to her car. Once on the road, her cell phone rang. She smiled upon seeing who it was.

"Hey you," Rory said happily.

"Hey, Ace, how's your day been going?" Logan asked cheerily. They'd established a system where they talked to each other at least twice a day. That wasn't counting times when Rory couldn't get to sleep and would call despite the fact that it was 5:00 AM Greenwich Mean Time. Logan didn't mind. He welcomed the early morning calls.

"Well, I just had lunch with Doyle and Paris," she explained.

"Oh, God," Logan sympathized. "So how are the lovebirds?"

"Logan, remember what I said. When Paris is happy, the whole world is happy –"

"I know, Ace. Deadwood, I've got it," he reminded her.

"Well anyways, they started getting into an argument about the penguin movie and some documentary about this horse named Cloud." Rory shook her head upon thinking back on the conversation. "It started to get pretty heated."

"Yeah? Like a fear-for-your-life kind of heated?"

"I thought they might to WWF right there in the middle of the restaurant," Rory decided.

"Yeah that and I could definitely see Paris pulling a Mike Tyson."

"Eww, Logan…eww. Bad mental pictures. Bad, bad mental pictures," Rory said in disgust, drawing laughter from Logan.

"Sorry, Ace. I just had to put that out there."

"You just had to," she said with a head shake. "So how has your day been going?"

"Same old, same old. You know, people kissing up to me just because of my last name. I swear, you're the only thing that keeps me sane, Ace. My secretary still shakes when she talks to me."

"Maybe she just thinks you're amazingly sexy," Rory suggested.

"Yes, did I forget to tell you? I'm leaving you for Doris, my 45-year-old secretary. Sorry."

Rory let out a long, sarcastic sigh. "Well, I can't say I didn't see it coming. Thanks for coming clean with me. It's greatly appreciated."

Logan laughed again. "What would I do without you, Ace?"

"I have absolutely no idea."

"But in all seriousness, I really do miss you," Logan confessed.

"Oh, did I forget to tell you? I'm leaving you for Billy-Bob, the 50-year-old gardener from across the street. We already have a wonderful life planned out together. Yeah, he says I'll make an amazing mother to his six illegitimate children. We'll be one big, happy family. Like the Brady Bunch, except Paris will be our Alice."

"Oh man, that sounds exciting. I can't wait to watch your sitcom."

"Fridays at seven – don't forget to tune in." Rory grinned as she continued to drive.

"So are you on your way back to work after your action-packed lunch?"

"Yup, it's back to the Gazette."

"Any chance of you running into my father?"

"Nope. Daddy dearest hasn't showed his face there in awhile."

"Good."

"Logan," Rory chastised.

"I can't help it, Rory. It still makes me angry what he did to you," Logan explained with a certain sharpness in his voice.

"I know, but he did help me get my job here, so he kind of made up for it."

"Yeah, except for the fact that you dropped out of Yale because of him."

"Logan, I did not drop out of Yale because of your father. There were other reasons," Rory tried to reason.

"Mm-hm," Logan mumbled, unconvinced. "Well he was at least one of them."

"Alright, I'll give you that much," Rory gave in.

"Thank you."

"And I hate to do this, but I just pulled into the parking lot at the Gazette, so I'm gonna have to let you go."

"Alright, I'll call you later."

"Okay, I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Bye." Rory flipped her phone closed and held it up to her heart for a moment before replacing it in her purse and heading back to work.

-

"Welcome, Ms. Gilmore." Emily's new maid politely greeted Rory that evening for Friday night dinner.

"Thank you," Rory replied as she entered the elder Gilmore mansion and gave her purse to the maid.

"Emily and Richard are in the living room with your mother. You can head right in; they're expecting you."

Rory walked into the living room where she was greeted warmly by her grandparents and her mother.

"Rory," Emily said happily. "Sit, sit, sit. Richard, get Rory something to drink."

"What'll it be, Rory?" Richard asked as he stood and made his way over to make her a drink.

"A glass of wine would be great, Grandpa."

"A glass of wine it is then," he said as he poured one for his granddaughter and handed it to her before sitting down beside Emily again.

"So, how's work at the Gazette?" Emily asked.

"It's good, it's busy. I'm learning a lot though," Rory explained.

"That's wonderful, Rory. The best way to learn is to get out there and do it for real," Richard said happily.

"You're most certainly right, Richard," Emily agreed with a nod. "So Rory, how is Logan doing?"

"Oh, Mom…no," Lorelai warned quietly.

"What?" Emily looked completely baffled. "Rory is his girlfriend, so she would certainly know how he's doing better than anyone else in the room." She returned her attention to Rory. "How does he like London? Mitchum's not working him too hard, I hope."

"It's okay, Mom," Rory said with a reassuring smile before looking back at her grandparents. "He likes London enough. It's hard work, but he's learning a lot and getting a feel for the business. I don't think Mitchum's being too hard on him."

"It must be hard with him being in London though. How long has he been away?" Richard prodded, causing Lorelai to glance away nervously, positive that Rory was going to burst into tears within seconds.

"Yes, it's hard…really hard," Rory added quietly. "It will be three weeks by Tuesday."

"And when are you going to see him next?" Emily asked, looking at Rory curiously.

"Umm…not sure. Thanksgiving maybe?"

"Thanksgiving?" Emily looked appalled. "That's practically four months away. That's much too long to be apart from someone you love."

"Agreed," Rory said with a nod.

-

"Ugh, no not that movie," Paris said in disgust, flipping the channel.

"I know what you mean. I hate scary movies, too," Rory said as she took a bag of popcorn out of the microwave.

"I'm such a wimp when it comes to scary movies." Paris continued flipping channels, trying to find something to watch.

Rory ripped open the bag and dumped the popcorn into a big bowl. "I only like watching them when I have Logan to…" When I have Logan to cuddle with, she finished mentally. But I don't anymore. The smile disappeared from her face, but she shook her head and forced another one back on. Grabbing the bowl, she made her way over to the couch where Paris was sitting, still flipping through channels.

"Jeez, you guys get over a thousand channels, you'd think there would be at least one thing to watch," she complained. "Oh my God! Cloud!"

"Paris, no," Rory stated firmly. "Keep going."

"But –"

"No."

After finally setting on a random TV show, Rory leaned back into the couch and sighed with contentment. "This is nice," she stated. "Just hanging out. Watchin' TV."

Paris nodded in agreement. "This is nice. That we can just hang out together. No work to worry about, no school. Just relaxing."

"I can't believe we're going to be seniors next year," Rory said in amazement.

"I know. It feels like I was just a Freshman at Yale yesterday."

"Tell me about it." Rory munched on some popcorn as she thought about everything that had happened in the last few years. From Chilton through Yale. So much had happened. She shook her head looking back at everything. "We still have our senior year though. It's going to be amazing. I can just feel it."

-

"Harry, can you get those faxed by three o'clock?" Rory called out to Harry from her desk.

"I'm on it!" He called back.

"Thank you!" She yelled over the commotion just as her cell phone began ringing. Pulling it out, Rory flipped it open. "Hello?"

"Rory? It's your grandmother."

"Oh, hey Grandma."

"Are you at work?"

"Yup," Rory replied. "Working like a fiend."

"Oh, well I hope you don't work yourself too hard," Emily said with concern in her voice.

"I'll be fine, Grandma. It's work, it's hard, but I love it."

"Well, that's good," Emily replied.

"So, is there something you wanted?"

"Nothing in particular. Just calling to check in. To see how you're doing."

"I'm fine," Rory said, somewhat confused.

There was a bit of an awkward silence before Emily responded. "Well, that's good. I was just checking. Have a good afternoon, Rory. Goodbye."

"Bye." With that, Rory flipped her phone shut, still completely confused. She quickly dialed a familiar number.

"Hello?" Came Lorelai's voice.

"Mom?"

"Hey, Doll. What's shakin'?"

"I just got a really weird call from Grandma," Rory explained. She could practically see an annoyed frown coming onto her mother's face.

"What kind of call?"

"She just called to see what I was doing. I mean usually when she does that she'll at least come up with an excuse like to remind me about Friday night dinner, but this was a straight out 'Just calling to check in. How are you doing?' kind of call. It was weird. Is something wrong with Grandma?"

"Well, word on the street is she had a bit of a falling out with some of the DAR members," Lorelai explained as she typed on the computer at the Dragonfly.

"Oh no," Rory said dramatically. "What kind of a falling out and who did you hear this juicy piece of information from?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Lorelai assured her.

"Try me," Rory dare her.

"Luke."

"What? Since when has Luke been a member of the DAR?" Rory asked in mock astonishment.

"Ha ha, you're so funny, Rory, ever think of being a stand-up comedian? I swear, you're just our own little Dane Cook aren't you?" Lorelai responded sarcastically as she handed a group of customers their keys and received some strange looks.

"Alright, I give, how does Luke know?"

"He heard it from Babette."

"But she's not in the DAR either."

"I know. That woman's magical, Rory. Magical, I swear! But after Luke told me I called my Dad and had it confirmed. She's obviously bored with her own life now that she doesn't have so many things going on and is trying to pry into yours."

"Wow Mom, you're quite the 007 with all of this top-secret information you've been obtaining."

"Please," Lorelai scoffed. "I wouldn't quite classify my mother's little quarrel with members of the Daughters of the American Revolution as "top-secret" information."

"Call it what you want it," Rory said with a shrug. "I've got to finish up here."

"Okay, call me later, Kid."

"Will do. Bye."

-

Rory locked her car before heading to the front door of her and Logan's apartment building. It was surprisingly cold for the beginning of July and she suddenly wished she'd brought a jacket. She was almost to her building when suddenly she heard her name. She stopped walking and paused for a moment. Logan? She whirled around, heart practically pounding out of her chest and found herself face to face with someone completely unexpected.

"Dean? What are you doing here? How do you know where I live?"

"Rory," he said desperately as he stumbled towards her. Rory could tell that he was drunk. "I'm so glad I found you. I had to find you. I had to tell you." His words were slurred and his eyes were bloodshot. He looked eerie in the moonlight, and Rory suddenly felt uncomfortable. She took a step backwards.

"Dean, what do you want?" She asked clearly.

"You," he replied. "Rory, I need you. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry about Lindsay, about dumping you at that party. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, sorry." He took another step closer and Rory realized how completely pathetic he looked. Dean actually had tears in his eyes.

Rory was so taken aback that she practically choked on her words. "I…I don't know what to say. This is certainly a surprise."

"Rory, come with me," he begged. "Please, I'll do anything. Please, please come with me. I need you."

"Dean, you don't look too good. Listen, why don't I call you a cab? It's really late."

"No!" He yelled, causing Rory to jump. "Rory, I need you to come with me! I need you to come with me right now! I love you, Rory! I love you."

"No, Dean, you don't love me. You're drunk. You need to get some sleep," Rory tried to reason with him. He wasn't listening though. He stumbled closer to her.

"No, I'm not drunk. And I don't need sleep, I need you." He reached out and cupped her cheek in his hand. Rory quickly pushed him off out of disgust.

"Dean, I can't go with you. It's late and you're drunk. Please, just let me call you a cab." Rory went to pull her cell phone out, but Dean grabbed her wrist and pulled her to him. "Ouch, Dean, get off of me." She tried to pull herself free, but even though Dean was drunk, he was still stronger than her. "Dean, get off of me! I can't go with you!"

"You have to, Rory!" He grabbed her other wrist and gripped it tightly. "I love you! I'm sorry!"

"If you love me so much then why are you hurting me?" Rory screamed at him. "Dean, let go of me!"

"Not until you agree to come with me. I love you, Rory!"

"Dean, I can't go with you. I don't love you!"

"Don't say that!" Dean yelled right into her face. She could smell the putrid scent of alcohol on his breath and had the sudden urge to wretch.

"Dean, let go of me!" Rory was to the point where she was pleading with him. She could feel the circulation in her wrists being cut off.

"I love you! You love me! We belong together, Rory! Do you remember the car? That car that I built for you?" He was still yelling at her. Rory turned her head away from him and did everything she could to pull away.

"Dean, I don't love you. I'm with someone else, now let go of me!"

"What!" Dean roared, throwing her back against the sidewalk. Rory landed hard on the cement and had the wind knocked out of her for a few seconds. "No, you can't do that! You love me! Me!"

Rory chose to seize the moment and pushed herself onto her feet. Dean came at her again, but she kicked him in the groin, causing him to double over in pain. Quickly, she grabbed her purse off of the sidewalk and turned around to run into her building. When she was finally safe inside, she finally breathed. The doorman looked at her with concern in his eyes. "Ms., are you alright?"

"F-Fine," she managed to mumble back before getting into the elevator. She looked down at her hands. Her palms were bloody where she had caught herself when Dean threw her back onto the sidewalk. They stung as well. Her wrists were bright red where he's gripped them. As soon as Rory was back in the apartment, she ran over to the sink and ran her hands under cold water, washing the blood away. She held paper towels to her palms until the bleeding stopped. They still stung, but at least they weren't bleeding so badly anymore. Looking at her wrists, she could see they were beginning to bruise

Rory walked over to the couch and sat down. Her heart was still pounding and her entire body continued to shake. All of a sudden she began to cry. What had just happened? What was Dean doing? He was obviously drunk, but what had possessed him to come back and hurt her like that? Where did he even get her address? He'd hurt her emotionally and physically. It hurts when someone from your past like that just shows up and declares their love for you while they're drunk. Especially the man she'd lost her virginity to. Rory for the cordless phone and quickly dialed Logan's number. It was 4:30 AM in London.

After four rings, Logan answered with a groggy, "Hello?"

"Logan?" She whispered, still crying.

"Ace, is that you?"

"Yes," she croaked before sobbing as a new wave of tears racked her body.

"What's wrong?" He asked, suddenly very awake.

"Dean," she whispered.

"Dean, your ex-boyfriend Dean? What about him?"

"I ran into him tonight," she managed between tears. "I-I-I was coming back to the building and he just came out of nowhere. He was so drunk and…" She had to stop as more tears came.

"Rory, what happened?" Logan asked, his voice dripping with worry.

"I don't know," she sobbed. "I just…he started saying that he loved me a-and he wanted me to come with him." Rory blew her nose loudly before continuing. "And then he just grabbed me and started screaming at me."

"What? Rory, did he hurt you? Are you okay?"

"No," Rory cried.

"No he didn't hurt you or no you're not okay? Rory, talk to me. Tell me what happened."

"Logan, I'm sorry," she sobbed before hanging up the phone. She didn't have the strength to talk about it. The apartment phone rang seconds later, but Rory let it go to voicemail.

"Rory, it's Logan, pick up the phone. Rory I know you're there, pick up. Please. Rory please pick up the phone. Talk to me; you're scaring me. Rory, please pick up the phone!"

Rory wanted to pick up, she really did, but she just couldn't. He kept calling for about a half an hour, but then the calls stopped. She couldn't keep the tears from coming. She was so sick of crying. She hated crying, but there was nothing she could do to stop. Finally, a little while after Logan's phone calls stopped, she finally cried herself to sleep.

-

Please review. Constructive criticism is welcome.