Untouchable
By DeepFreeze27

Untouchable. It's defined as "not to be touched", "out of reach", "unobtainable". It was the perfect word to describe Haruhi. Not matter how close he got to her, not matter how many times he showed his heart to her, the wall between them could not be breached. She acted dense, pretended not to understand that he loved her, but he knew.

She was the kind of girl that anyone and everyone fell in love with. She was kind, she was smart, she was beautiful, she was brave. She was everything a boy looked for in a girl. And she was untouchable.

Not even Tamaki, the king, could touch her. She slid away from every pass he made at her, easily evading the feelings thrown at her. Maybe she didn't want a boyfriend. She'd grown up alone, hadn't she? Why would she need a man to complete her? Perhaps she was scared. There's a novel idea. Haruhi was only frightened of one thing and it surely wasn't men.

With a sigh, Hikaru speared another piece of ootoro and shoved it in his mouth as if it pained him to do so. Maybe it did. Ootoro was her favorite food. He could easily remember the time he'd given her a box of it. It almost made him smile to recall the way that beautiful mouth of hers slid into a wide grin.

"Thanks Hikaru!" she'd said, plopping herself down at a lunch table and digging in. It had only taken him a few moments to realize that the smile was not for him; she was simply happy at the thought of eating the precious food. That had hurt.

"What's wrong, Hikaru?" Kaoru questioned. His eyes, usually perfect mirrors of his twin's, were clouded with worry.

Hikaru shrugged, chomping down on another piece of ootoro hard enough to make the fork vibrate in his mouth. He winced and his eyes filled up with tears at the sudden pain that went searing through his mouth.

His brother stared at him in silence, then bent his head over his own plate, pretending not to be hurt by Hikaru's silence. The two sat at one end of the long dining table in their mansion. They ate alone. Their mother was out of town for another fashion show and their father always worked late on Sundays.

Hikaru could both see and feel the hurt his brother felt, but refused to open his mouth to speak. The last time he'd spoken about Haruhi to Kaoru, he set them up on that stupid date. Hikaru winced at the memory. Half of him had been elated to be on a date with her. The other half of him had been miserable. He could plainly see that she had no interest in being on a date with him. Not a romantic one anyway.

In the end, he'd come back with the knowledge that no matter how sweet she acted towards him, she wasn't interested in him that way. He was crushed. She was the only girl he'd ever liked. Before her, girls hadn't existed in his world. It had simply been him and his brother. Now, because of her, things were different.

Hikaru glanced at his twin out of the corner of his eye. Their relationship wasn't the same. Kaoru no longer depended on his brother as he had. Hikaru didn't know if he liked this new, independent part of the younger twin. A part that had appeared, he knew, because of her.

And he was different as well. Though he couldn't quite pin point exactly what was different about him, it was there. Kaoru could undoubtedly tell him, but he didn't want to ask. He was afraid of the answer. He'd paid a price for falling in love with Haruhi Fujioka and he had no desire to find out how high the price had been.

It was funny, in a tragic kind of way, that she had no knowledge of the way she plagued him. She was blind to the effect she had on him; oblivious to the way his insides twisted and jerked in her presence, the way he shook at the thought of touching her. A dream really. Despite the playful passes he and his brother made at her, he was not appeased. He wanted something real. He wanted her to look at him, really see him, and respond to him the way he responded to her.

And she never would. That was the harsh reality. Haruhi would never feel for him what he felt for her. The realization was almost comforting. He was hopeless. Hikaru smiled bitterly and pushed his plate away.

He'd been a fool to think that he had a chance with someone like Haruhi. He was as stupid as she was untouchable. He could be her friend, but that was all. Anything more would be beyond the scope of reality. The only place she would ever love him were his dreams, and he would have to be content with that.

"I'm going to bed," Hikaru muttered as he stood.

Kaoru nodded and watched his brother leave the room.

In the foyer before the stairs, Hikaru paused to stare out the window. It had begun to rain. Thunder could be heard in the distance.

"Hope someone's there to hold you," the boy mumbled, that bitter smile still on his lips,"Because I never will."

Then he turned and walked away.