Hey everyone I don't own Naruto, neither do you, we should all get into a big group and cry.
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It was just another normal day for Aburame Shino… that is, until he got out of bed. "Hn." He said as he looked at his reflection in the mirror. He was completely covered in hives. It is a little known fact, that the bug user is allergic to sugar, and as it turned out, one of his bugs had quite the sweet tooth last night.
As he shook the sleeves of his pajamas, candy bar wrapper after candy bar wrapper fell out. "Hn."
"Shino get your buggy ass down here, it's time for breakfast!" His father called him.
"Hn."
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After he changed his clothes and left his room, he was heading downstairs for breakfast but as he turned towards the stairs he locked his eyes on a new picture of a purple butterfly. As he finally ripped his eyes away from the portrait he saw the steps just in time… to faceplant into the first stair, but before he hit it he had time to utter one word: "Hn."
The rest of his family watched as the young shinobi continued to roll down the stairs. As he got up and brushed himself off his sister (yeah he has a sister) ran up to him and hugged him saying, "Oh dear brother, please come sit with us." Dazed and slightly confused by his trip down the stairs, he decided to go along with his sister, who seemed to be acting nicer than usual. Was his day finally turning to favor him? Nah. As he sat down he distinctly heard the shattering of glass and the sniggers of a small girl.
"Hn." He said as he stood up and realized that he had sat on his favorite glasses.
He now had to make the dangerous trek back to his room to get another pair of glasses. As he took the first step on the treacherous stairs, "Shino" his mother called, "be careful when you walk on the stairs." The irony of the matter is that as she was warning him of the stairs, he stepped just so that he landed right on his ankle and it snapped in multiple places. Great now he had to go see the great fan-girl bitch and get it healed.
When he finally made it to his room, he looked into his special drawer for sunglasses and what did he find? Nothing, completely and totally nothing. "Hn." He stated quite unsatisfied that someone had been stealing his favorite type of glasses. Now he had to wear his coat extra high as to cover his hives and his hair extra low so that nobody could see his eyes. Why was this day going so bad?
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"Hn hn hn hn hn." The Aburame hummed as he walked down the street towards the special hospital where Sakura was interning. He was determined to turn this day around no matter what it took! Then he saw Kiba walking with Akamaru, but the annoying part was that Akamaru was wearing HIS sunglasses, so he walked up to Kiba and simply stated "Hn."
"Oh man I'm really sorry about taking your glasses, just the sun was in Akamaru's eyes, and I didn't think you would mind." Kiba nervously explained to the other boy.
"Hn" Shino stated. He was not going to stand for a dog wearing his special shades.
"Yo man really sorry." Kiba said as he gave back the angry Aburame's glasses. Low and behold as he put his returned sunglasses back on, his eyes were filled with excruciating agony. This day was just getting worse, for now there's a dog hair in his eye. For those of you keeping score at home that's five things gone horribly awry. All he could do was take this horrible abuse Kami was laying at his feet as he continued to the hospital.
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"Oh hello Shino we didn't know you had an appointment today." The girl at the desk stated enthusiastically.
"Hn" he replied.
"Well I need your insurance card, social security number, eighteen different types of photo identification, and a lifetime record of you and your exploits." The perky deskgirl said.
"Hn" he replied realizing that he only had seventeen different types of photo I.D.
"Oh well that's too bad, I can't let you in." She said. Yet another blow to Shino. "Well as I see you really need to get your ankle looked at, I could let you in under one condition."
"Hn?"
"I'll let you in if you kiss Kiba right here in front of me."
What was he to do? He couldn't make it all the way back home with his ankle in it's condition. He noticed that Kiba was walking by the front door so he went outside, grabbed Kiba, dragged him back inside, and locked lips with Kiba.
Kiba at this moment was in sheer heaven right now because, as you all know, Kiba is extremely gay. "Wow, I guess that was good enough. Camera! Damnit I can't believe I didn't take a picture of that."
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"Hello Shino, what happens to be the problem today?" The pink-haired girl inquired.
"Hn."
"Oh ok, I'll take a look at it right away." Sakura said as she bent down and did various test on Shino's ankle. Right away she went to work on his ankle but sadly enough… "I'm sorry Shino, but I don't have enough chakra to fully heal your ankle today so you're going to have to wear a splint for a few days."
"Hn."
"The only splints we have left are these chibi Sasu-kun ones." She told the bug boy as she made a face like :3.
"Hn."
As Shino walked out of the office, his pants snagged on one of those dental pick things, which shouldn't have been there in the first place, and you know what happened. His pants ripped all the way up to his mid thigh. "Hn." The boy stated.
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After a day of applying hive ointment, fighting off attacking fan-girls, pranks being played on him by his little sister, and getting weird looks from Kiba, the bug boy decided to finish this horrible day on a good note, he headed over to Ichiraku ramen, where all the regulars were at the moment including Ino, Naruto, Hinata, Sasuke, Neji, Tenten, Sakura, Rock Lee, etc.
"What can I get you kid?" Old man Ichiraku asked our hero.
"Hn." He replied.
"I'm on it." The old man said as he went to work on the boy's order. As he turned around Ino stumbled and spilt her ramen all over the young Aburame and let me tell you, this was the straw that broke the camels back.
"GOD DAMNIT THIS IS SOME SERIOUS BULL SHIT! WHY HAS THIS DAY SUCKED SO BAD, WHY IS KIBA SO GAY," at this point bugs were swarming all over the diner, "I WAKE UP WITH HIVES, BECAUSE ONE OF MY DAMN BUGS DECIDES THAT HE'S IN THE MOOD FOR SOME CHOCOLATE, I FELL DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS, MY SISTER MADE ME CRUSH MY FAVORITE GLASSES, I BROKE MY ANKLE, I HAD TO KISS THIS FAG IN THE MIDDLE OF A DOCTOR'S OFFICE, I HAVE TO WEAR THIS DAMN SASUKE SPLINT, I RIPPED MY PANTS, AND NOW I HAVE RAMEN ALL OVER ME! WHAT THE FUCK!"
Naruto was the only person still in the place, even the bugs got so frightened, they scattered as if they were illegal immigrants, and immigration services tracked their asses down. "WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?"
"I figured I had something to say that could be useful I your situation." The Jinchuriki replied.
"OH YEAH, AND WHAT IS THAT?"
"Simple," the blonde said as he took another bite of his ramen, "life sucks, then you die."
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God it suck to be Shino doesn't it. Well I had a bad day so I took it out on Shino, sorry man. Just so everyone knows I love gay people although I am straight. If you like me come check out my profile and join my RPG group, there's a link on my profile, check it out. L2 OUT.