Author's Note – Warning – this is quite a bleak sequel. I felt that this could be one way it could go, and I wanted to experiment with it. I just want to warn you that it's quite dark, just so you know...right, if you still would like to read I would Love to hear your thoughts after: )

Ah – I should add this would take place before Amy and Laurie had their daughter. Whether Jo and Fritz have any children can be left ambiguous...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Amy's Requiem

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dearest Husband – My Lord, My Laurie,

I just can't do it any longer. I'm so sorry, so desperately sorry. I've tried, really I have. I've tried to pretend that I didn't know what I know. That I don't see what's in front of me, plain as my nose. That I don't hear the way you speak to her.

I can't pretend that I didn't know from the start. I did. I so wanted to fool myself into thinking that you would be be able to replace her with me. I should have known better. How could I ever take Jo's place in your heart?

It's not your fault, my lord...'My Lord' – even that sounds cold, doesn't it? I never could be warm like Jo. She is the sun and I the moon. We're different as night and day. Even our names for you show it. I always meant to be playful with my pet name for you, and I had the idea that you returned my sentiment when you always replied with 'My Lady'. It's not the same, though, is it? But calling you Teddy, that's such a comforting, cozy name that only my hot blooded sister could afford you. I always wanted to call you that, but you wouldn't let me, would you? Well, I say blast to that and I shall address you as such for the remainder of this letter. Teddy. See? I don't give a whit if you don't want me to call you by her name...it's too late to care, anyway.

The thought of how this farewell will find you troubles my heart tremendously. I'm afraid there isn't any other way. You know that we can't go on this way – either of us. It's like a slow icy poison trickling through our veins and I just can't stand to detain it's effects any longer. We both need to be released from our ill advised decision – we both need to be free.

What worries me most is what will happen after I'm gone. Will things really be put to right by my leaving? That's what's been holding me back thus far. I can't bear to begin to think of how my family will react. I don't want to put any more dark clouds in their sky, we've all had so many already. This really is the only road that I can take. I won't lie to you, Teddy dear – I am frightened. There's only one thought that sustains my fear and that is of being reunited with sweet Bethy.

I am also most terrified of what sort of reception will greet me when I reach those pearly gates of heaven. I am not a fool, I know that what I'm about to do is not acceptable in the great book...but I also know that He understands suffering and I am hoping that our loving Beth could give a word for me. I never realized how much I needed her until she was so cruelly ripped away from us. I need her goodness to help me through. I need her strength. She always was the angelic one.

I don't expect you to understand; I don't expect anyone to. I don't understand it, myself. All I know is that this thumping gaping wound inside is engulfing me a little more each day and there's nothing stopping it's escalation. I know it's selfish of me, but then again I always was the selfish one.

Please give comfort to Meg. I know she will take my going very hard, and she already has so much on her shoulders. Tell her twins that I love them and I didn't want to leave them...but please, don't tell them my particular demise. I do not want them to grow up thinking their Aunt Amy weak...even though it is the truth. Let Meg know that I will be happier where I am. She always was the maternal one.

And Jo – I needn't tell you how to comfort Jo. You know her better than anyone ever has or will. I wanted to be her; always, even before my rivalry for you, dearest. I would never tell her that. I had to look down at her boyish and wild ways, but the truth of the matter was that I wanted to emulate her in almost every way. She always knows what she wants and gets it – well, 'not always' as she once said to you. Yes, my lord, I heard that conversation the two of you had when we first returned home, married. Forgive me for eavesdropping, it wouldn't be contained. You and my sister were a match made by Providence and I should have never intervened what the natural course would have been.

I wanted you for myself and the Professor needed our Jo. Our love for you both blinded us to reality. I've been watching the Bhaers closely as of late, and I can tell you, Teddy – for I will use that name for my remainder – I can tell you that my sister is in love with you.

The poor Professor knows, dearest. He knows, just like I've known. And he's tried to ignore it, just as I have; but I can see it weighting his already aged shoulders. It won't come as a surprise to him. Please just promise me, both you and Jo, promise me that you will take extra kindness when you break the news to him of your inevitable union. He's been through so much, and we two have formed a somewhat tentative bond over our shared heartache. Oh, I know that neither you nor Jo wanted to hurt us. I know that both of you are hurt, as well. It's time to stop the hurt.

Please tell Jo that I will be alright. Tell her that her Beth and I will be together and take care of each other in the highest and truest castle in the air. Let her know that I love her dearly, admire her greatly, and will miss her terribly! She always was the sentimental one...even though she went to pains to deny it!

I just looked out the window and I find that it's time to hasten my goodbye. You will be home soon and I need to leave softly, before you find me with the salty trails veiling my cheeks. I don't want you to see me like this. I'm glad that we had such a wonderful and quiet evening together last night. I'm glad that I looked my loveliest this morning – and you at your most dashing – when we parted; the last time we'll ever see each other.

You don't know this, but I've been thinking of how I'm going to leave this world for some time now. Sitting right across of you. You smiling at me, having no clue how I hide my broken and bleak thoughts behind a sad smile. I kept thinking how would Jo want to leave this world? Some romantically melancholy exit, no doubt. After much debating I have finally conceived my sad little plan, but I shall not share it. I don't wish to torment you with any details. I am so, so sorry, my love. I said that already, but I had to tell you once more. I love you. I love you, Theodore Laurence, and that shall never change, not even in death. All I want is for you to be happy; but forgive me, dear husband – I can not stay and watch. That would kill me and turn me blacker than what I'm about to do will, sure as Sunday. Don't forget what I said about handling the kind Professor with care when you finally get your true love back. And please, please tell Marmee and Father that I love them both very much and I will be waiting for them when the time comes. Thank your grandfather for all of his immense kindness to the Marches. I will be waiting for all of you when it's His will to reunite us; for the more I dwell on it, the more I'm certain that He will forgive me and welcome me to his palace. We will be together again, Laurie, one day. Only then, it will all be as it should be – the family together and you with Jo by your side...as it was meant to be all along.

I love you. Goodbye.

With all the love that my heart can muster,

Your Lady, Amy Laurence

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Whew! That was actually a bit draining to even write! Sorry, hope you all aren't too angry with me for exploring such a dark path as a possibility for her. I just felt that it could happen this way and I thought it'd be a good exercise to write. Anyway, I would be quite grateful if you have the time to let me know if you liked it, hated it, loved it – heehee – you know, whatever!