AN: after Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.

Disclaimer: don't own. Not saying again.

Chapter one

There he went again, this time laughing so deeply and earnestly. He was sitting at the Gryffindor table with his two best friends…and new girl friend. Ginny Weasley, red hair, medium height, pale skin that brought out her freckles not to mention that famous Weasley temper. She sat next to him at their table, he was laughing at a joke Ginny had just made; his arm loosely around her shoulder, bringing her close; she didn't seem to mind. Down seats away was Dean; staring angrily into his lunch.

And here I am, sitting at my table watching him for – what, the sixth time in the past twenty minutes? I'm sitting at the Ravenclaw table, comprehending nothing around me. I didn't notice Marietta as she tried talking to me about something or another, I didn't notice Michael as he slipped his arm around my waist but I did notice when Ginny turned her head and look up at me.

It was a look of wonder and resentment, did she resent me? Why? She had nothing to complain about; she had the boy she had loved for so many years, while I had lost him before anything could be ventured, before I could even get to know him! I thought as I had been doing for the past months; I knew nothing about him. While she had his love, attention and time. She made him happy and that was what counted, not that I had gotten to his heart first or that I had been his first kiss, all that really mattered was who would be his last.

From where I was looking, Ginny was number one. He would die protecting her, and I would watch. They would defeat He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, get married, have kids, live in the perfect house, have the perfect kids, and die together. They would be happy were as all I would have are old memories and tear filled regrets.

My gaze became misty and I cried. Right there; in the middle of the great hall, like I had done so many times before, I cried. Only Michael and Marietta noticed since they were closer. My gaze fell on Michael's worried face; what do I see in you? My eyes shouted at him. I turned to Marietta, another person I constantly wonder why about. Why had she betrayed Harry and most importantly me? I turned back to Michael.

"I want to breakup," and I left. Heads turned in my direction, even the one that matter most, then I noticed Ginny's pointing. I rolled my eyes; I was much prettier than her. I would get over Harry, for he had gotten over me. I walked to the Ravenclaw dormitory and went to bed without a second thought.

It had been a day or two since she had cried in the Great Hall and people were still talking about it. It wasn't nearly as big as Harry Potter dating Ginny Weasley but they still talked about it; if only because they were bored. Cho sighed as she made a left and then a right; she was going to visit the room of requirements again. She didn't particularly need any thing from the room. Sometimes she just likes to stand outside the room and think.

She would slouch on the opposite wall and think of the kiss that she had shared with Harry. Not the worlds best kiss but at least it's one she'll always remember. Then again, who could forget a kiss by Harry Potter?

She was almost reaching when she saw him, weird. It had would be the first time she saw him this close since the glance they didn't share in the train. How long ago was that? He stared startled at her, green eyes wide with shock. She smiled, paused in mid step and stuffed her hands into her pockets.

"Hey you," she said and moved closer.

"Yeah," he nodded and stepped to the side, leaning against the wall staring up at the ceiling. Cho looked hesitant but after a few moments of silence went to the opposite wall and sat on the ground.

"What brings you here?" she knew he most likely wouldn't answer her or rather he would evade the question and not give a real answer.

"Nothing, just passing through," he too sat on the floor and added "you?" as an after thought.

"I…was on my way to the room of requirements, for old time's sake," she added at his sharp look. It made her feel uneasy; the look was filled with question and mistrust. Harry nodded his head and turned away, they sat in silence for a few seconds and Cho got up dusted herself off, Harry followed. She looked at him in surprise and looked away. They stood in awkward silence and was getting to both of them, she could tell.

"I'll…see you around Harry?" she asked and started walking towards the Great Hall.

"Cho, Wait!" she turned and waited for him to catch up.

"Yes Harry?"

"Stay away from the room of requirements. Okay, just listen to me," he said as he opened her mouth to protest.

"Something weird is happening at school this year; it all just seems out of place. I think someone is doing something in that room and if I'm right you shouldn't be near it. Just promise you won't go near it," he asked, almost impatient.

"I'll go where ever I choose, thank you!" he rolled his eyes and walked forward stopping after a few paces and turning to her.

"Don't go near the room, as a friend; I'm asking you to trust me," this time Cho rolled her eyes but nodded none the less.

"Come on, lets get you out of here," he said as he held out his hand for her. She took it and smiled at him; they made their way to the Great Hall together and stopped at the entrance.

"Well, see you when I see you," and with that Harry dropped her hand and walked inside. Cho stared at her hand for a few seconds and continued back up the stairs and to the Ravenclaw dormitory.

Harry sat at the Gryffindor table and waited for Cho to enter the Great Hall; she didn't. He wasn't too worried, after being friends with Hermione all these years he knew girls could take care of themselves. He was greeted with friendly hellos, waves, and batting of eyes lashes by the girls and a kiss on the cheek by Ginny; life at Hogwarts was looking great.

He knew he should get over the fact that Malfoy was in the room of requirements; doing god knows what but he couldn't; he wanted to be right; simple as that. Malfoy was up to something and until he found out what it was, no one was safe.

He smiled at everyone and grabbed anything within reach. He shoved food into his mouth and listened to the conversations around him. Hermione and Ron were arguing about something, again. Lavender was a few seats downs, glaring at them. He rolled his eyes and focused his attention to Ginny.

She looked so pretty, swirling her soup around with her spoon, every once in a while taking a sip and continuing. Harry smiled; the beast inside him purred silently with satisfaction. He turned his attention away from Ginny to his hand; it tingled with heat from where he had held Cho's hand. He blushed and looked away.

He shouldn't have held her hand, he was with Ginny. There was no doubt about the way he felt for Ginny; the animal inside him made sure there was nothing to doubt with its possessiveness and…what else? Now that he thought about it the beast inside him only showed possessiveness, nothing else. Did that mean he had only wanted Ginny because she was had been with Dean? No! But- no, damns it! He doubted his feelings.

"Guys, I've got some homework to finish, see you later," Hermione beamed at him and Ron groaned, obviously not looking forward to his load. Ginny nodded and stood to give him a quick kiss on the lips; he smiled and waved goodbye.

He went up the marble stair case and went to bed. It was time he went to bed early one of theses days; watching out for Malfoy, studying and avoiding girls took a lot of him.

She didn't see him as much as she would have liked to in the next couple of days. But then again, they never really did talk that much. Then one day, Death eaters are attacking the school and everyone fears for their life. There was nothing she could have done; she felt guilty. The few hours after were the hardest to live through: they kept saying things like

"Dumbledore's dead…"

"Harry Potter was with Dumbledore before he died…"

"Snape did it!"

"We all knew the git was bloody evil!"

Most of the stories held the same basic ideas. After hearing the one about Harry being with Dumbledore Cho almost had a heart attack. To hear that he could have been killed made her heart stop for one second and caused her great pain. One hand to her heart, mouth slightly open, she felt like…it couldn't be explained but she never wanted to feel that way, ever.

She didn't get to take her N.E.W.T., everyone was not tested because of dumbledore's death. Everything considered normal was forgotten, with Dumbledore's funeral only an hour away. She would most likely redo her last year, if Hogwarts was still open. She hoped it was, she didn't know what she would do with her life if she didn't have Hogwarts.

She couldn't become a Quidditch player because that just wasn't what she wanted anymore; the game had lost all its fun and charm. The air that had once seduced her was gone; the mystery would die the moment she left Hogwarts: the mystery of why being so high would make her Adeline rush way pasts it's limits, why matching another seeker would make her heart beat ten times faster.

Those feelings were something she got from Hogwarts and nothing could compare to Hogwarts but what was Hogwarts without Dumbledore? He made the school what it was for years, all the mystery revolved around that man and him alone. Cho sighed and continued to pack her things. She came across some old school work she forgot to hand in, ten multicolored quills, and her old dairy. She flipped through it and stopped any time something interesting popped out at her.

Sunday

He's on my mind constantly! Theses feelings get annoying but most times it nice to know I can feel these things. I wonder if he ever thinks about me, weird thing to ask but I wonder what it would be like to talk to him again. All of over conversations ended in a fight and that must mean something because I like fighting with him. When ever we fight it means we have to make up; I'm usually apologizing but that's okay; I usually start the fight.

I woke up today and he was the first thing on my mind. Then I started day dreaming again: mostly about what our future would be like. In this day dream we had two kids, TWINS! Isn't that cute! They were the cutest babies ever, with his vivid green eyes, my hair and both of our seeker ability: they were just perfect!

Cho looked the entire page over and continued on, stopping to look at a poem she had written.

Friday

Endless River

An endless river of tears that end at four, my heart clinches and I want to cry but only four tears come; They're cold and don't feel real, why? Forced to be real, they slip away, as I slip away from you. As the urge to cry a real cry becomes desperate I am saddened. Deep, heavy, uneven and painful breaths are taken and the tears come again, then…nothing. They stop and I think of you.

I think of how much I wish you'd hold me, touch me, and talk with me. I write and I talk but you don't listen! I want you to understand; why don't you understand? These tears are for you, these fickle things, feeling cold against my skin, are for you! They gush and stop at four then they continue.

They blind me until I will myself to blink them away, until I tell myself "they're not real" over and over again. It seems like each night I wait for the tears and each night I wish they were real; maybe then I can get over you. But they come in rivers of four…then….nothing.

They sparkle brightly, contrasting with my feelings. I always thought you knew me but I guess not; was I always invisible? Have I changed from that quiet girl you knew? Have I blossomed into something more? Or am I still that speck among the rest trying to get attention? No, I'm the girl with tears in rivers of four; don't you see me cry out to you with my eyes?

They plead with you to say something; they scream with rage, wanting attention. I need it, just to know where I stand. The tears are slowly pilling up and now I'm in a puddle, drowning even so. I search for you; "save me" my mind pleads, come back but it's too late and your gone; another face in the crowd; your arm around a female's shoulder. All the while the tears come in a river of four.

There they go again; feeling so cool against my skin. Then I start to wonder; would it drive you mad to have these feelings for me, these deep and powerful feelings, would you die if it had been you who watched ME flirt with many different boys, getting over one and then moving on to the next; never spearing you a glance? And this time, the four tears of a river never come, instead a heavy feeling pulls my heart and I can't breathe…

AN. Yay! I have been reading Harry and Cho fan fictions and I love that coupling. I have been writing over the summer and have been taking notes. This came to me a few days ago and I love it. It's not done but I just thought I'd get it out there. I wrote the poem about a boy I was in love with; I actually wrote it…9/8/06. it was a Friday, last Friday to be precise.

I thought I was in love with the boy but he didn't like me that way. He thought I was smart, just "not his type" as he told my friend. Garr. Well, I'm getting over him and I thought I'd use some of the stuff I wrote about him in my stories. Oh, I used parts of my diary to make Cho's diary entry…yes, I had a day dream about two brown eyed babies…sue me!

Ps. don't' care about grammar, as long as I get my point across; so please don't come and review and start bitching about grammar. If I miss spell a word tell, cause then It bug the hell out of me when I reread it on fan fiction and I see a word misspelled. Grr, it annoys me so damn much.