Wind Beneath Me

Disclaimer: All rights belong to Joss Whedon and ME.

Summary: On the anniversary of Tara's death, Willow comes to some realizations. Willow/Faith friendship.

Faith walked into the kitchen of the Summers residence, already thinking about the day's training schedule. Immediately upon entering, she sensed the heavy mood and took a quick glance around. The hush was eerie. The Potentials all seemed uneasy, but Faith guessed it was because Buffy and Dawn were quiet and not making eye contact with anyone. Even Andrew was strangely silent as he prepared breakfast.

"Jeez, who died?" Seeing the sisters' withering looks, Faith grew serious. "Oh god, who died?"

"I was kind of wondering the same thing," Kennedy said, and the other girls nodded in agreement. "Everyone was fine last night, and now suddenly these three are all gloom and doom."

Buffy exchanged glances with Dawn, and the younger Summers looked like she was holding back tears.

"Um…today is…" The eldest Slayer paused to consider her words. "A year ago today, Tara died."

Faith cursed softly. She started to say something, then thought better of it. Less than half the Potentials knew who Tara was, but even those who didn't kept their mouths shut as well.

Except Kennedy. "So?" Whap. "Ow, Faith! What the hell was that for?" the Potential demanded, rubbing the back of her head.

The dark Slayer glared at her. "And ya wonder why Red doesn't wanna date ya."

"Sorry," Kennedy murmured, chastised.

Faith turned to Buffy. "Red come down yet?"

"No. Not sure if she will. It's, uh…kind of a first for everyone, so we don't really know what to expect."

The younger Slayer simply nodded.

A few minutes later, the redhead appeared in the doorway.

"Morning, Will," Buffy greeted, only a bit softer than usual.

"Hey, Buff," Willow responded quietly. "I'm going out for a while, okay?"

"Okay. You want someone to go with you?"

Willow stopped her turn towards the front door and looked up into Buffy's eyes. What looked to be a spark of gratitude flashed for a second, but then it faded.

"I don't want to bother anyone."

Faith stepped forward and lightly tapped the witch's arm. "Hey, no bother."

The normally cheerful redhead dropped her gaze to the floor and shrugged. "Sure, whatever."

Without another word, the taciturn witch backtracked through the living room and walked out the door with the dark Slayer following closely behind. Faith watched out of the corner of her eye as Willow plodded along the streets of Sunnydale. Her eyes glued to the ground, the witch seemed to be off in her own world. Not once, though, did her steps falter in the face of obstacles, human and inanimate alike.

"Hey, just outta curiosity, we got a destination here?" Faith eventually asked.

"No."

"'kay. Just checkin'."

Eventually, they passed through the gates of the Restfield Cemetery. Faith quirked an eyebrow, but she said nothing. Her skepticism grew when she realized Willow was taking a very specific path through the grounds.

"Thought you said you weren't headin' anywhere in particular," Faith teased gently.

Willow seemed to come out of her daze as her eyes focused on the headstone before her.

Tara Maclay
Beloved Partner and Friend
Oct. 16, 1980—May 7, 2002

"I wasn't," the redhead finally responded. "I didn't even realize I was here…"

She was silent for a long time after that. Faith was uncomfortable being there, not knowing if she should stay close or give the witch privacy. Her indecision caused her to stay right where she was, shuffling nervously from foot to foot. She nearly jumped when Willow spoke.

"It's been a year. I've been dreading this day. The day I look back and say I've had to survive a year without my Tara. And now that it's here, you know what I realize? It doesn't stop. There's going to be another year, and another, and another, until finally I just wither away and die without ever knowing if I'll get to see her again…"

The Slayer remained quiet, waiting for her to continue. In the back of her mind, Faith noticed that Willow's eyes were dry, as if there were no more tears to be shed.

"I don't understand why people die. I don't mean to sound like Anya, but…it's so stupid. I mean, I understand the mechanics of it…but I just don't understand why."

"I'm not sure anyone does, Red. Part of bein' human I guess. God knows and all that."

Willow scoffed. "The gods know…? I asked Osiris why, and even he couldn't answer me. The gods know nothing. Or maybe they just don't care. Kind of makes a person feel insignificant, you know?"

"Maybe to the powers, but not to the people around ya. People here…they look up to ya, Red. Respect the strength ya got."

Willow smiled bittersweetly. "She always said I was the strong one, but…it was her. She was my strength." Her bottom lip trembled. "She was my everything."

"The wind beneath your wings, huh?"

Willow looked into Faith's eyes, expecting to see mocking in their dark depths but instead finding only compassion. She nodded in response. "Everything I've done…it hurts. And this last year, I think on some level I kept expecting her to show up and make it all better. But now…" Willow indicated the grave. "She's really gone…and I've never felt so alone."

"You're not alone, Red. And I know it hurts, but that's good. It means you're still alive. Still able to heal. Ya just gotta let it happen."

"I don't know if I can."

"Then let somebody help."

"How can I? They're all afraid of me, Faith! They don't understand what it's like!"

"I do. Havin' people be afraid of ya, afraid that you're gonna turn on them any second. Not understandin' how hard it is to have that darkness inside, beggin', screamin' to get out. Yeah. You're forgettin' I've been through it already." Faith lowered her head and whispered, "I'm still goin' through it."

Willow was quiet for a prolonged moment. Then, "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I never understood back then…what you were going through. Worse yet, I never tried to understand."

"Yeah, ain't hindsight a bitch?"

"Yeah."

"I tried to go it alone, Red, but I ended up beggin' Angel to kill me. Don't let yourself sink that low. It ain't fun crawlin' back up."

Silence reigned as the awkwardness caught up with them. Willow, still emotionally detached, stared at her lover's grave, and Faith dug the toe of her boot into the ground.

"Ya gonna be okay?" the brunette finally asked.

"I think so."

Faith put an encouraging hand on the smaller woman's shoulder. "Sure ya will. I bet you'll even find a new wind someday."

Willow looked up at her companion. "Maybe I already have."

The Slayer regarded the witch uneasily with a sidelong glance. "I'm not good at people countin' on me, Red."

"You don't have to be." The redhead looked at the ground. "I just need a friend, Faith. Just one person who understands."

The former rogue took in a breath. "Then I'm your gal." Willow stepped toward her, but Faith took a hasty step back. "Nuh uh. I don't hug." Faith rolled her eyes at the hurt puppy dog look on the woman's face. "Oh, for crap's sake, c'mere." The Slayer enveloped the grateful redhead in a warm embrace. "You'll be alright, Red," she whispered against auburn hair. "You're stronger than ya think…"

As the two women held each other, a gentle wind swept around them and circled up towards the heavens.

End.

Author's Note: There may possibly be an angsty follow-up story to this. What do you think?