"I used to think you were someone that would never ever hurt me, ever. God and now I just can't stop picturing you with her. I can't, it doesn't matter what you say or what do Ross, it's just changed everything. Forever ..."

"This can't be it!"

"Then how come it is?"

------------------------------------------------

Seven months and six days …

… That's how long it had been since their fatal conversation.

CLICK – CLACK

CLICK – CLACK

CLICK – CLACK

As she rode the subway she wondered what she would say.

Both had made their decisions and would live with them. Both were responsible for the current state of affairs.

CLICK – CLACK

CLICK – CLACK

He had cheated on her, on them. He had changed everything, forever.

She had a choice, give the relationship another chance … or end it on the spot. She had chosen the later, a decision that she would live to regret. He was many things to her, most of all her best friend. She missed him.

After the breakup he made another choice, not nearly as big as his infidelity but almost as important, he withdrew. He pulled back from his friends and from her. Even his sister was not immune from his departure. In the 220 days since the breakup he had seen Monica less than a dozen times. A birthday, an anniversary, that was the extent of it. He did only what was necessary to maintain minimal family contact.

Rachel wondered. She had fared worse than his sister. She could count on one hand the number of times she had been in the same room with him over that time span. Each time they were in a group of people and never alone. He would utter no more than a few words of greeting to her before starting a conversation with another. She wondered why …

The train neared her stop. Outwardly, she gathered her purse and coat. Inwardly, she mustered up her courage.

As she approached the building she stopped. Looking up, she peered at his window, wondering if he was home. She hoped he was. There she stood, loitering by the entrance. Finally gathering enough nerve she opened the door and entered.

Standing before his door she paused, questioning her motives for being there. She needed to see him. She needed to know why, why he had withdrawn from the group … and from her. She had to know what he had been doing with himself all this time.

Her anticipation rising, she raised her hand and knocked on the door.

"Hold on, I'll be right there!" responded a voice from the other side of the door …

She breathed deeply.

… it was a woman's voice.

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