A/N: can't say much here since I'm at school right now trying to upload this before the teacher comes in and kills me :P but yeah, this is a REALLY long one, so I hope you guys like it! and I bet you're happy with how fast I got it up :D I'm proud of myself, ahaha. oh, and one of the scenes in here is like... really similar to one of my one-shots, and I didn't mean for it to come out that way, aha. I swear I didn't copy and paste (joke).
Disclaimer: see chapter one, and the song used in here is called "This Never Happened Before", by Paul McCartney. From 'The Lake House'. (GOOD MOVIE) XD.
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"Tell Me What It Means"
Chapter V - "To Decide"
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Climbing across that tree proved to be harder than it looked. It was annoying, too. He didn't know how Ed could stand doing it after the first time. Al had never been good at outdoor activities such as climbing, and he kept slipping over the branches, attaining small scratches on his arms. But, somehow, he managed to make it all the way across, and he could only be thankful that Ed's window was open. He grabbed hold of the windowsill and hoisted himself up on his elbows.
The room was painted a slate blue, and it was obvious that Ed had only moved in a short while ago. There was still a number of boxes piled by the wall, and the only other things in the room was a hamper full of clothes, a dresser, and a bed that was by the wall with the window.
And on the bed, there was not only one person,
But two.
Al's eyes widened a bit. There slept Ed, golden hair unbound and spread across not a pillow, but someone's lap. A girl's lap.
His chest tightened uncomfortably as he looked at her (he was surprised she hadn't noticed him yet). Her fingers combed through his hair in soft strokes, with an even softer expression on her face as she stared down at him. She was pretty. Thin, with a slightly darker skin complexion than Ed's. Her hair was odd though, pink bangs, with the rest of it brown and back in a ponytail.
Al made a small noise without entirely meaning to though, and her head snapped up, violet eyes widening.
For a moment, neither moved, both staring at the other with shocked expressions. Alphonse thought for sure she was going to scream, or jump up and push him out or something. Anything other than what she did.
Her expression softened a bit, almost looking sad, as if she had come to some realization. Then she averted her gaze back down to Ed, and as gently as she could, she lifted his head from her lap and rested it back on his pillowed before she sat up from the bed. Al was thankful for some reason that he didn't wake up.
Then she walked over to him and offered him her hand. He blinked at her, wondering what the in the world she thought she was doing. She didn't even know who he was or why he was there, so why was she going to help him into her friend's room?
Alphonse couldn't help but cast his eyes downward for a moment as he wondered if that's all she was…
"C'mon Alphonse, I'll help you up," she then said. He shot his gaze back up, eyes wide now, and confused as hell. Still though, he decided to give her his hand and allow her to assist him inside. "Uhm… thanks," he managed as he planted his feet firmly on the carpeted floor. But instead of giving him a small and a 'you're welcome' like he thought she would, she just stared at him with the most peculiar look on her face. Her eyes were fixated on him, and she looked almost like she wanted to reach out for him, but held off. Alphonse almost asked her if she was all right.
"Alphonse? Is it…?" she spoke, taking a step toward him. He took a step back, starting to feel a little scared.
"Uh…" How the hell did she know his name? Had Ed told her about him? Even then, why was she acting so bizarre?
If possible, her eyes grew even larger. She took another step. "Is it you, really? Oh my God, Alphonse, I can't believe it!"
Okay, now he was scared. There was no more room behind him unless he went back out the window, and she kept coming closer.
"You're so tall! And your hair, you grew it out, what are-,"
"Rose."
They both froze at the voice, and turned to look over at the bed, where Ed was sitting up now. He rubbed at one eye while he stared at them with the other. Alphonse couldn't hold back the flinch that came when he saw that Ed didn't have his contacts in.
"Oh, Edward I'm sorry!" the girl exclaimed, rushing over to him and kneeling down. "I woke you up."
"Yeah, you did, but it's fine." He looked away from her and over to Alphonse, who still had a frightened look on his face.
"Hey, Al," he offered with a smile, causing the brunette to blush slightly. "Sorry about my cousin here, she's a little crazy."
"I am not," she huffed. "That's Alphonse-!"
"Yes, Rose. He lives next door, and we met last week when I moved in," he explained in a tone that sounded like he was speaking to a child. She fell silent though, still frowning at the blonde.
"Al, this is Rose," he then stated, looking back over at the younger boy. He blinked for a moment, the pieces coming together a little bit.
"Oh! Well, uh… hi," he managed out, still feeling a bit frightened of her. She turned to him with a sudden smile, but something in her eyes looked upset.
"Hey, Alphonse, nice to meet you. Ed's told me a lot about you, I guess that's how I knew who you were." She gave a small laugh and a shrug.
An odd silence followed after that, but then Ed bonked the girl on the head. "Don't you have a ton of schoolwork to get done before you go home?" he asked. Al's eyes widened slightly.
"It's almost four o'clock anyway, you should head back. I'll be fine."
She looked on at him for a moment, looking like she wanted to protest, but then just smiled. "Yeah I guess you're right." She stood up then, but leaned down a little to give him a hug.
"Thanks for stopping by," he spoke into her shoulder as he hugged her back.
Alphonse watched with a tight knot in his stomach, feeling out of place.
A minute later, she left the room with a smile and a wave to both boys, and then they were alone.
"So whattcha doing here, Al?" Ed inquired, snapping the boy out of his trance. Al jumped, looking over at the blonde.
"Oh, uh…" He rubbed at the back of his neck uneasily. "I… well, you haven't been in school, and you didn't tell me why, so I figured something must be wrong, so I-,"
Ed held up a hand, silencing him successfully. "Thanks, Al," he said with a small smile.
The brunette blushed and looked down at the floor in hopes that Ed wouldn't notice. "It's nothing. Are you… feeling better?"
Ed shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much. Still got a few kinks to work out, but I'll live."
Silence ensued for a few moments then, while Al racked his brain for something to say.
"So, uh… Rose – does she live close by?"
Ed nodded simply, then gestured to the chair over by the desk for Al to sit in, who went to drag it over by the bed and sit down in it.
Ed went on to explain. "Well, for right now she's in town for some regional soccer competition with her home school team. She really lives on the West Coast, and we see each other on holidays and such. But when she's given free time during the week she'll be here, she comes over here to visit."
Al muttered a small 'oh' in response. 'She was acting so bizarre, though, like she knew me. But she didn't look familiar to me, and her name didn't ring any bells…'
Then something else popped into his mind. "Oh! So where's your Dad?" he inquired. Ed averted his gaze indifferently. "I dunno. Still at work, I guess. He has different hours every day."
His tone was identical to how it had been the previous weekend when he's first spoken to Alphonse about him. It was hard for the younger boy to imagine disliking his own Father so much, especially if he was the only parent you had all of your life.
"Ed? Can I…" Alphonse it his lip, feeling as though he were intruding on something he wasn't he had no business with. "Can I ask why you don't like your Dad?"
The blonde frowned. Something Al had only seen him do one other time, which was also that same Sunday morning. It made him want to put the nosy question back behind his lips.
"He… let something dear to me disappear from my life when I was just three," he said then, his voice as distant and cold as an oncoming rainstorm. Alphonse looked on, now seeing a side of Ed that he'd yet to see. But beyond that, what he'd just said…
"Someone as young as I had been at the time," Ed continued, eyes narrowing at the carpet. "Should never have known the kind of hatred I felt for him then. Sure, over the years, he's tried to make up for it, I guess. He's hardly ever cross with me, and doesn't treat me indifferently. He just gives me my space, I suppose. But… I could never let what happened go. I can't let him forget, and that's why I can't truly love him as my father."
Alphonse was left speechless. He'd never heard anyone talk in such ways before, and about their parents, let alone from this boy who always was so calm and collected about things.
"What… did he do?" he asked then, unable to stop himself. "What happened?"
Edward didn't respond for quite some time, his gaze still stuck strong on the floor. Then, in a voice that sounded more like a hiss, he said, "He let my Mother leave us."
Again, all Al could do was stare. He remembered Ed telling him he didn't have a mother, but he hadn't said why.
"And I hate her just as much for it, if not more. It was her idea to leave, and my Dad just let her go as though he didn't even care. There weren't even any arguments between them about it. She just left, and he might as well have seen her out the door. Neither of them cared about the opinion of a three-year-old."
Edward's voice was filled to the brim with anger now/ His body shook, and he lowered his head further so his bangs covered his face from Al's view, who still stared at the sight before him. He was completely dumbstruck, unable to think of anything to say or do. All he could do at that moment was feel sympathy. He'd lived a wonderful life with an unbroken family, and a mother and father who both loved him and each other, and who he loved just as much. But Ed had no mother, and a father he hated. Alphonse had no clue how to even tell him not to feel so badly about it.
Then, biting his lip again, Al hoisted himself from the chair and onto the bed next to the blonde. Edward lifted his head, confused, but was pulled back down against Al's chest as his arms came around his neck. He was a little nervous about doing it, but if it would help just a little, then…
"I won't pretend to know what you're going through," he then stated, gazing at the other side of the room over Ed's mop of gold hair. "But I want to help you with it. I've heard quite a few times that when family fails you, then you have to lean on your friends."
Al felt Ed begin to relax. "And you said we were friends, right? So if there's anything I can do, even if it's just sitting and listening, then you better let me know."
"Al…"
Ed fully relaxed into him, tentatively bringing his arms up and around Al's waist. He didn't cling too tightly, though. The churning of Al's stomach began to subside, and an odd feeling of contentment welled up within him. It almost felt like this was something he'd done before on a number of occasions, and didn't feel at all uneasy about it anymore. Something in his mind told him he truly wanted to help the older boy in any way he could. And though he could just say it was because he was his friend, he knew it wasn't going to be that easy to explain.
It was then that Al felt the body held in his arms begin to shake lightly. A bit startled, he looked down at the top of Edward's head to see his whole body trembling.
Silver optics blinked in surprise. He moved a hand to pat his shoulder. "Hey," he spoke. "Ed, you okay?"
The blonde didn't look up or respond, but actually clung tighter to Al, hands fisting the back of his shirt.
"Alphonse..."
Al felt his heart rate pick up considerably. That was the first time since they'd met that Ed had called him by his whole name, and his voice when he'd said it… desperate, choked, it sounded like he was…
Alphonse's eyes widened at the realization. "Ed… Edward, hey," he persisted, shaking his shoulder now. "Geez, what's wrong?"
The tremors in his body were going on and off now. Slowly, he lifted his head from the brunette's chest, but still kept his face hidden with his unbound hair. Al stared down at him, thoroughly alarmed now. What had him so upset all of a sudden?
Hesitantly, and unsure of what he was doing, Alphonse lowered his hand to touch Edward's temple. From there, he moved his thumb carefully to where his eye would be. And, as he had thought, there was moisture. Tears.
"Ed, you're crying!" Completely worried now, Al put both of his hands on either side of the older boy's head and guided it upward. Indeed there were tears pooling in those haunting golden eyes, which gazed half-lidded past Alphonse's face, obviously a little embarrassed.
"Ed, look at me, what the hell is wrong?"
Gold finally met silver, very tentatively, and Alphonse could've sworn that the amount of tears in his eyes actually increased. He was surprised he wasn't speechless at this point.
"Alphonse," Ed repeated, his voice just above a whisper now. The younger boy's heart thumped in his chest, his face burning up, and unable to do anything but stare at the still-trembling person in his arms. There was a faint red hue to Ed's face as well, and Al wondered idly if it was from his fever.
Ed spoke again, huddling even closer. "I'm… having a hard time thinking things through before I do them." His voice still seemed like he was trying to keep an immense amount of emotion back. Al swallowed hard, his neck arching back a little ways as Ed continued to inch closer. "Everyone says I'm too impulsive."
It was then, with those words, that Al seemed to come out of his stupor, and jerked away. Roughly. He stood up and away from the bed, his chest tightening into a painful knot of nervousness. Edward stared up at him, one of his arms slightly outstretched from where it had been around Al's waist. His eyes were wide, something resembling fear lingering in them. Alphonse tried to speak. But what could he say? Still though, he managed to mumble out something about having to leave, and then stumbled out of the room. He made his way down the stairs, and out the front door of an unfamiliar house. He said a silent thank you that Ed's father hadn't been home, even though that would've been the least of his worries.
It wasn't until he was in his own home and in his room did he finally let out the breath he'd been holding. His heart began to slow down, but still he felt as though he were shaking. Instinctively, his hand lifted to gingerly touch his mouth, trying with all his might to keep his mind from thinking of what would have been there if he hadn't jumped away when he had.
Sleep refused to come to him that night. Try as he might, his eyelids kept drifting open and staring out of the window, and his mind wandering to what was across the way from it. The moon shone in too brightly, seeming at that moment even more persistent than the sun, blinding him, and keeping him awake even when his body and mind felt exhausted.
Groaning, Alphonse kicked the blankets off and sat up in his bed. He swung his legs over the side, stood up, and left the room. The alarm clock on his nightstand shone green lights into the dark room. 1:42 am. He wandered to the front hallway, and went outside onto his front porch. The cool May air blew through his unbound hair, but it wasn't cold enough to make him shiver. He went and sat on the porch swing, using his feet to push himself lightly back and forth, his gaze drifting across the street, but not really looking at anything in particular.
He felt a little scared then. Not only was he confused as hell about what had happened, but he was scared as well. He worried that Ed would completely shut himself off from him because he had almost… because of what he did, and not want to talk to him at all. And Alphonse wanted to say something to him, to let him know that it…
That it what? Hadn't bothered him? That it was fine? Both were lies, but still… why wasn't he upset about it?
The whole thing had made things a little clearer, though. Alphonse would like to think that while he wasn't the brightest person he knew, he wasn't dense, and when something happens like what had earlier, he just cannot deny what must really be going on in Ed's mind. He wanted to come up with some kind of explanation, that maybe Ed had been acting out of delirium from his fever, but he'd been completely coherent minutes before. So… the fact of the matter had to be that he felt something a little more than just friendship for Alphonse. Friends don't almost… kiss friends. Not in the way he had wanted to, anyway. And even with this realization, Al still couldn't find it in him to really be bothered by it. The only thing that did was the fact that he couldn't figure out how the hell he himself really felt.
The sound of a door opening and closing then caught his attention, his head instinctively turning in direction of the noise, and watched with wide eyes as Edward walked down the concrete path across his front lawn, a garbage bag held tight in on hand.
Al blinked. 'Odd chore to be doing at nearly two in the morning.'
Ed proceeded to drop the bag in one of the plastic bins by the street, and Al keeping completely still as he began to walk back. Maybe if he didn't move, he wouldn't notice him.
But, as always, luck wasn't on his side.
Halfway back to his own front door, Edward's gaze had lifted lazily upwards, then back down and to his left. He saw Al there, and his eyes widened as if he'd locked gazes with a ghost. He froze mid-stride, Al mid-swing.
The brunette wanted so badly to say something, maybe even coax the other boy over so they could talk. But before he was able to gather enough courage to do so, Ed pulled himself out of the intense stare, and disappeared into his house.
Alphonse's heart sank down to his stomach, and he fell back against the swing with a sigh. He sat there for a few minutes longer, hoping maybe Ed might come out again, but when he didn't, he went back inside.
He didn't bother going up the stairs. He knew he wouldn't get any rest up there, fear of seeing Edward across the way from his window too great. He walked into the living room, where he collapsed down onto the couch. Sleep came pretty easily then.
The next morning, Al's mother woke him up with a queer expression on her face, inquiring why on earth he'd slept down there. He came up with some lame excuse about his bed feeling too uncomfortable.
He thought for a long while throughout the course of the day what to do. Surely Ed wouldn't do anything, and leave Al to himself, probably convinced he was either angry as hell, or freaked out as hell. So if he wanted to clear the awkwardness up, Alphonse knew he would have to go talk to him himself. And somewhere in his mind, he somehow came up with a plan that he thought might actually work.
So, after dinner, Al lied to his parents by telling them he was going out with Winry for a while, and left. He strode over to the neighboring house, its windows gleaming orange in the sunset's reflection.
He had no clue what to say, and he was as nervous as could be. He could barely believe he was actually going to go through with it, but before he had a chance to lose his courage, he knocked on the front door. It seemed like a full ten minutes before he heard someone behind it, yelling about something, and then it opened, familiar blue eyes going from casualty to shock-slash-fear.
Alphonse stood still for a moment, wishing for a second that he were safe and back in his room. He wasn't used to actually dealing with his problems right away, and face to face. But he stood there, forcing himself to stop fiddling with his hands, placing them at his sides.
"Ed, I-,"
A voice from within the house interrupted him. "Who is it?"
Ed turned back into the doorway, yelling back, "No one!" before closing the door and stepping fully outside. He looked at the ground for a moment, then past Al's right ear. Al thought about asking if his father was home, but thought better of it. Though he still had no clue what to say.
After a few moments of crushing silence, Alphonse took a breath and said in the most casual voice he could muster, "Are you busy right now?"
That got Ed to look at him directly, confusion in his expression. Al gave him a smile, hoping it would explain all that he felt too awkward to say.
"What?"
"I wanna show you a bit of downtown. You interested?"
Ed fell silent, looking both confused and guilty now. He swallowed. "But Al, I…"
The brunette just put up his hand to silence him. "Just come on. It'll be fun."
So he wasn't facing the issue. He was acting like it didn't happen. But so long as it just went away for the time being…
Again Ed looked surprised, but at last allowed himself a smile, looking both relieved and happy at the same time. Then he nodded, and walked down the small steps from his front door.
"We'll take my Dad's van," he said, gesturing to the blue vehicle in the driveway. Alphonse again thought of asking something, if it was okay to just take it without him asking, but didn't. He sat himself in the passenger's seat with Ed in the driver's. He started it up, they backed out, and soon they were on their way downtown.
During the entire ride, Al could tell that Ed wanted to say something, ask something. Most likely of why he had forgiven him for what he almost did, or more so for how he felt about him. Al was thankful he kept the conversation away from it all, as if it hadn't happened. He didn't think he could answer such questions.
As they neared their destination, the sun went further down until it was just a faintly glowing orange line on the dark violet horizon. The air blowing in from the vehicle windows began to smell salty from the ocean, light and clear. Alphonse always loved going down by the ocean, just because everything seemed so much clearer; the air, the atmosphere… everything.
"How about we go down to the boardwalk?" Al then suggested, noticing that they weren't far from it.
Ed nodded. "Sure."
Al then instructed him on which turns to take and where to park, explaining that they'd have to walk a bit to get there. When the car pulled into an empty spot along the street, and the two climbed out of the vehicle, he was just glad he hadn't gotten them lost. It had been quite a while since he'd been down there, and it wasn't like he'd ever driven there himself before.
The walk to the pier wasn't a long one, just down a street to where the sidewalk ended and was taken over my wooden planks over the water. The sun had disappeared completely by that time, and the lampposts had since been lit along the railings of the docks. It was a Friday night, so there was quite a lot of people, but somehow Al's mind was able to focus solely on himself and the person next to him. Everyone else was just a blur of color and sound. Little shops and souvenir stands lined the walk, along with small restaurants and ice cream sellers. Alphonse wasn't one for crowded places, but he had always liked this place. Probably because it was on the water. Something about water had always calmed him.
He then recalled Ed telling him the same thing on the night they'd mad. He liked going out on boats and spending time on large bodies of water like lakes or oceans. He thought that maybe, in the back of his mind, that's why he'd chosen to come to the boardwalk.
Then he remembered something. "You know there's a boat that goes out on the river every two hours or so," Al mentioned in hopes that Ed would say something. "Do you wanna do that?"
The blonde glanced up at him, actually looking interested. "Really? Well yeah, that sounds nice."
Al smiled. "We should go buy our tickets now then, I don't know when it'll be coming back."
Ed nodded and followed him past two more stores where he took a turn to the other side of the pier. Once at the stand, the woman working there told them that the next departure would be in an hour, and they purchased their passes.
As they walked around a bit more, Al was glad when Ed asked if they could go into one of the shops. As he followed him in and through the different shelves, Al just watched him. The older blonde had been quiet nearly the entire time, and Al could only guess why. Ed obviously felt awkward around him, and Al didn't blame him. He felt awkward himself, but he was trying his best to just pretend like nothing happened. He knew this wasn't the best road to go on, but for now he just wanted to have a good time to forget things for a bit. Maybe getting away from the issue, but still be with Ed might help his mind finally decide what it was that he felt about him.
It just… seemed so odd, that all of this would be plausible. They'd only met barely two weeks ago, and right away it had seemed like something was off. Alphonse felt comfortable around someone he barely knew, and Ed trusted in Al enough to have told him about his family, even seeking comfort in his arms…
Al's heart fluttered at the memory. Somehow, he'd forgotten about it amongst what had happened right after. But it returned to him – the memory of holding Ed close to him, and Ed clinging right back. It had been soft, warm, and so new to him, though somehow coming naturally.
In the very least, Alphonse knew that the boy walking next to him was special. Somehow, in an incredibly short amount of time, he'd managed to become an important part of Al's life. He just had to figure out which part that was.
Later, when Alphonse and Ed were aboard the ship and it was pulling out of the docks, the brunette was relieved to see Ed actually acting excited. He even grabbed Al by the hand and dragged him to the front of the ship once they were a good distance from the pier. Neither said much as they stood behind the railing, watching the city drift by slowly.
"I've never been down here at night before," Ed spoke then, catching Al off guard. "It's beautiful."
There was a smile on his face, and Al couldn't help but smile as well. "Yeah, it is." Silence followed again after that.
It hadn't been a very cold night, but with the chill from the wind, Al involuntarily shivered.
Ed noticed. "You cold, Al?"
Al, embarrassed, waved his hand in a dismissive manner. "Nah, I'm fine."
"Well, I'm a bit chilly, so do you mind if we head inside for a little bit?"
"Uh… sure, I'm fine with that."
They turned to walk away from the railing, heading for the double doors to the upstairs part of the boat's interior. They stepped inside the bright room, and the music that they had barely been able to hear outside was now clear and loud. The top floor was more of a balcony, with just tables and seats, but a huge opening where you could see below to the dance floor. Quite a number of people could be seen moving around to a song that Al heard daily on the radio. He didn't much care for it.
"You wanna go downstairs or stay up here?" Ed asked.
Al looked around. There were only a few people on their level, so he guessed they were all either outside, or with everyone else downstairs. But he always preferred less-crowded places, and the view of the city would be better higher up, so…
"Can we stay here? If you don't mind?"
Ed nodded. "Yeah, sure. Downstairs seems too crazy right now."
Al walked forward and sat down at one of the many tables along the wide windows, on the side of the large room where no one else was sitting. There were three other groups of people up there with them, but he could barely make them out with the railing in the way. So he and Ed were practically alone.
He averted his attention to the window, looking down at the river, sparkling with the reflections of lights from within the city. Below them, a new song began to play.
A few minutes passed before Al heard Ed clear out his throat. He glanced at him without turning his head, and saw that he was staring fixatedly at the table.
"Hey, Al?"
The younger cringed at the sound of his voice. He sounded nervous. And just when he thought things were gonna be okay for the rest of the night…
But Al pretended not to sound reluctant in answering, and just smiled. "Yeah?"
Ed paused for a moment, then flicked something from the table that Al couldn't see. "I… well I wanted to say thanks for inviting me out tonight. I think I needed it."
Al nodded, but knew that wasn't what he really intended to say.
"But, I… there's something that's… I mean, I need t-to tell you something," he stammered out, catching Al's gaze for a split second before staring down at the table again. Alphonse's heart began to beat a little faster, suddenly feeling scared. He barely noticed another song start playing on the first floor, a slower one this time.
"I don't even know if I should tell you," Ed continued. "It's, well… I just don't think it's fair to you at all that I-,"
Ed stopped short as Al, quite out of nowhere, brought his hand down atop Ed's, and roughly. For a long moment, both were too surprised to say anything, but then Al finally decided to speak.
"Do you like this song?" he inquired. 'Oh, what are you doing?! You're acting like a crazy person!'
Ed just blinked at him, his eyes wide. "I, uh…" he trailed off as he watched Al jump up from his chair, tugging on Ed's hand with his own.
"Come on, dance with me," he said in a forced-excited tone. He had no clue why he was acting so completely bizarre, he was probably making Ed feel even more awkward than he already did, and he could really punch himself, but…
Something told him he wasn't ready to hear what Ed wanted to tell him. And he had to do something before he said it.
Ed continued to stare up at the brunette, completely bewildered. "Al, I-,"
Al gave him another tug, feeling his stomach give an uncomfortable turn. "Just come on. Please? I like this song."
"I'm very sure this never happened to me before I met you. And now I'm sure… this never happened before."
To Al's utter surprise, Ed's expression calmed a bit and he stood up from his seat as well. Though while his expression was calmer, it wasn't happy. He looked almost somber, or defeated. Al gave him a shaky smile, but Ed was looking downstairs.
Nervousness swept over Al. Was Ed mat at him? Trying to stay as calm as possible, Al just proceeded to place him and Edward in slow-dancing stance, his other hand resting on his waist. Ed looked surprised again, and Alphonse could've sworn he saw his cheeks go slightly red.
He really had no clue in the world what he was doing. Not only had he quite rudely interrupted Ed in telling something that was obviously important to him, but now he was dancing with him, as though it were completely normal to do so. He averted his gaze upward to the off-white ceiling and started stepping in time with the music. Ed followed in suit, looking determinedly out of the window. Al was grateful that none of the other people on their floor could really see them, even if that would be the least of his worries at the moment.
"Now I see this is the way it's supposed to be – I met you. And now I see this is the way it should be."
Al glanced down to Ed, slowly letting his eyes travel away from the ceiling. The older boy looked like he was almost staring off into space. Probably thinking. Either that, or horribly uncomfortable. Al wouldn't be able to blame him. God, he felt so stupid.
Ed looked up then, sensing Alphonse's gaze on him. Al felt his heart pick up speed even more as their gazes locked, and was amazed when Ed didn't look away. Then, Ed did something that made Al feel so much better.
He smiled. It was small, and uneasy, but a smile nonetheless. Al bit back a sigh of relief, and smiled as well. They continued dancing, their movements becoming less stiff and awkward. Al felt his whole body beginning to move back and forth instead of just his feet.
The song began to surround him, becoming the very essence of his movements. Slowly, Al moved his hands further around Ed's back, drawing the blonde closer. Ed glanced up at Al for a split second in surprise before looking away again, an even deeper blush forming on his cheeks. Al figured his were just as red though, so he didn't pay much mind to it. And, going even further into the melody's small trance, Al leaned his head downward and rested his chin on Ed's shoulder. Ed stiffened a bit in response, but kept dancing.
"So come to me. Now we can be what we want to be. I love you, and now I see this is the way it should be."
"Al?" he spoke hoarsely.
He didn't respond, except for a small nuzzle closer. He felt like his entire mind was gone, and he was floating from somewhere far away, and just watching himself do all these things. But Ed felt so warm, and the memory of when he'd held him came back once again. It had felt nice then, but now it was like something entirely different; better. He felt like he couldn't control his body at all, but didn't mind, either.
He almost broke from his dream-like state when he felt Ed pull his right hand away from Al's, but felt his heart flutter when he just slowly moved it upward and onto his shoulder. Al felt both hands snake tentatively around the back of his neck, giving small caresses as they did so. The blonde's head had long since fallen into the crook of Al's neck. Instinctively, Al wound his hands around the small of Ed's back.
And both boys were so entranced with the half-dance, half-embrace, neither noticed the song come to an end, the singer letting out the last verse.
"Now I'm sure this never happened before. This never happened before…"
It was only when another song started playing did their feet stop moving. Slowly, they pulled away just far enough to look on at one another, but still holding onto each other. Again, Al felt something inside him take over, and he leaned down once more to plant a warm kiss atop the blonde's forehead. His lips lingered on the soft skin for what felt like a while before a loud 'boom' sound startled both out of contact.
Bright lights began to fill the dark shy from outside the windows, and Al heard people starting to move quickly outside, more booming sounds going off. He put two and two together, and realized what it was with a broad smile.
"Fireworks!" he exclaimed. "Come on, we have to go outside!"
He took hold of Ed's hand and dragged him to the doors they had come in before, and somehow managed to find an unoccupied spot by the railing where the two of them just fit, side by side. People were still coming up the steps from down below, all gathering around, children laughing, and adults hurrying each other up to get a good spot. But the fireworks were being set off down at the boardwalk, so anywhere was a good spot, really.
Al had completely forgotten that he hadn't let go of Ed's hand until he felt it shift inside his own. He colored a bit, but the initial embarrassment faded when Ed just moved his hand to interlock their fingers together. Silver optics turned away from the show of colorful lights to drink in the sight of a certain shade of blue that he found just as mesmerizing. For a while, he just looked on, but then smiled and squeezed the blonde's hand.
The ride home that night was quiet, neither saying more than a few words, but somehow, it wasn't an awkward silence. Alphonse would've thought that after all that had happened… not that it was that big of a deal… there would be complete discomfort in not saying anything. Even after the firework show had ended, the two of them walked around the boat, carrying on to one another about this and that, as thought nothing had happened. Everything had been perfectly normal.
Well, unless you count the fact that they didn't let go of each other's hands until they got back to the car.
But that was just a small detail, right? They'd held hands for more than an hour, and Al still felt reluctant to let go so he could get inside the van.
'Yeah Alphonse, really small,' he mocked himself.
"Al?" Ed's voice called then. Al looked over to him and then noticed that they were in his driveway, his own house just a few feet away.
"Oh, uh… sorry, was dazing off," he said sheepishly, feeling stupid. He opened the door to the van and clambered out. He shut the door and began walking around to the driver's side, where Ed was closing his own door. They stood there for a moment, looking on at one another.
So much for the awkward feeling being gone.
"I'll, uh… see you later then," the blonde stated, his voice pleasant. Al just nodded and smiled. "Yeah."
For a second more, they both stood still, but Alphonse made the first step to move toward his house, Ed following suit. They nodded to each other, and then turned completely toward their own houses. Al went up his steps and onto his porch, pausing only momentarily at the door, staring at the brass handle. Then he shook his head, and went inside.
Closing the door behind him, he fell back against it, feeling his head start to hurt. He gazed up with a forlorn expression at the ceiling, wondering what the hell was wrong. He'd been fine just minutes ago in the car, and nothing was even going on. Now he gets into his house and he feels like he's about to –
A loud knocking caused Al to jump nearly a foot off the floor, nearly letting out a yelp in surprise. He bit it back though, knowing it was fairly late and his parents were asleep. He knew the knocking had come from right behind him on the other side of the door, but still he just stared at it, as if the person doing the knocking would reveal themselves.
The knocking came again, a little more persistent this time. This time, Al reached out and opened the door hesitantly, already half-knowing who it was.
And there Edward stood, his expression serious, but seemingly scared as well.
"E-Ed?"
The blonde took a breath. "Al," he stated firmly, pursing his lips. As if to add emphasis to his expression and tone, he took a step inside the threshold, Al taking a step backward as he did so.
"Al, I need to talk to you."
The brunette felt his stomach drop. He'd nearly forgotten about the instance earlier on the boat when he'd tried to talk to him. His face must've shown a visible negative reaction, for Ed then said, "I wouldn't… bring it up if it wasn't important."
Silence then, Al having no clue what to say. What could he do now? But then, there shouldn't be anything, for there was no reason to not let Ed say what he wanted to say. He was just being completely stupid and impulsive, acting on his crazy sense of logic, which had been nothing but useless ever since…
Edward took another step forward, but his expression began to soften into something a little more desperate, as though he didn't know what to do from there. "Al, please… I'm… scared. This is probably so awkward for you, for me to be acting like this toward you."
Al's heart pounded against his ribcage, fear welling up within him like a curse. It was winding its way up his spine and throughout his body. 'Do something… do anything before he says it…'
The older boy continued. "This is really hard for me…" He faltered for a moment, but then straightened himself up and looked Al directly in the eye.
'Do something, this is it.'
"Al… you and I-," he began, but Al cut him off.
With his own mouth.
Ed let out a small muffled noise as Al dove forward and pressed his lips awkwardly against his, attaining the silence he'd wanted. He was holding onto the collar of Ed's jacket, his hands trembling.
The contact was brief, only lasting a few seconds before Al hurriedly pulled away, his entire face burning up. He let go of Ed's jacket, and brought one hand up to clamp over his mouth, and his eyes going wide with horror.
'Oh God, what did I just do?'
And it seemed that Edward was thinking the same thing, for his expression mirrored Al's almost exactly.
The brunette moved his hand from his mouth and moved it to reach for Ed, but immediately pulled it away. Somehow, he found his voice. "I… Ed, I… I-I'm so sorry…"
Ed remained still, but he managed to move his gaze away from the set of stairs behind Al to his face, distraught with fear.
Slowly then, he brought his hands upward to cup Al's face, the boy flinching slightly at the contact. Ed took a small step forward, despite the fact that he was mentally screaming at himself to stop. But the expression on Al's face, like he was lost and waiting… hoping for someone to help.
It was too much.
Before his conscious could return to him, Ed closed the distance between them, his head tilting the tiniest bit upward as their lips met once more. Alphonse, even though he had seen it coming in the back of his mind and hadn't moved, froze completely. The pounding of his head and heart intensified, and suddenly felt as though the floor had dropped out from underneath him. His own eyes were opened wide to see that Ed's were closed, his soft golden hair falling in pieces around his face.
A whimper rose in Al's throat, but Ed remained where he was, and even shifting a little bit closer.
'Not… not close enough,' his mind told him, begging him for more.
Squeezing his eyes shut, Alphonse quickly threw his arms around the blonde's shoulders, and brought him as close as possible while still remaining two people. Stars collided, bells chimed, and all those corny things you read about in books really happened as he clung to Ed in the front hallway of his house, kissing him excitedly and happily. But he didn't see them, like he'd originally thought.
He felt them.