Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING! I'm just using my literacy powers to create a silly song...
Glinda
Elphaba - why couldn't you stay thin for once,
instead of ruining your diet!
I hope you're happy!
I hope you're happy now!
I hope you're happy how you ate twinkies
forever, I hope you think you're clever!
Elphaba
I hope you're happy!
I hope you're happy, too!
I hope you're proud how you
stayed thin for condition, to believe your
own ambition!
Both
So though I can't imagine how!
I hope you're happy right now!
Glinda
Elphie, listen to me. Just use Ab Lounge!
You can still go on your diet
What you've worked and waited for
You can eat all the carrots you've wanted:
Elphaba
I know:
But I don't want them - No!
I can't want them anymore...
Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm tired of playing by the rules of
that diet's game
Too late for protien drinks
Too late for Jenny Craig
It's time to trust my tastebuds
Close my eyes, and eat!
It's time to try
Defying Diets
I think I'll try
Defying Diets
They'll never make me thin!
Glinda
Elphaba won't you understand?
You're having delusions of bon bons!
Elphaba
I'm through with trusting Atkins
Cuz' someone says they're great
Somethings I haven't tasted
But until I try I'll never know!
Too long I've been gaining
Weight that I've should've lost!
Well, if it's all fat
Then I should not fast!
I'd rather try
Defying Diets
Help me with pie, I'm
Defying Diets
They'll never make me thin:
Glinda - come with me. Think of what
we could gain: Together!
Unlimited
Our fat is unlimited
Together we will eat all we have dreamed
Glinda -
Stuff our faces with creamed'em
Glinda
If we stuff with teamed'em
Both
Together we will sue Weight Watchers down
Just you and I
Defying Diets
With you and I
Defying Diets
Elphaba
They'll never make us thin!
Well? Are you coming?
Glinda
I hope you're happy
Now that you're choosing this
Elphaba
You too
I hope it bring you bliss
Both
I really hope you get it
And you don't live to regret it
I hope you're happy in the end
I hope you're happy, my friend:
Elphaba
So if you care to find me:
Look to the Chinese Buffet!
As someone told me lately:
"Life is better when your belly's green!"
And if I'm gaining solo
At least I gaining free
To those who'd thin me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I'm
Defying Diets
I'm eating pie
Defying Diets
And soon my stomach with expand
And nobody in all of Oz
No diet that there is or was
Is ever going to make me thin!
Glinda
I hope you're happy!
People of Oz
Look at her! She's fat!
Get her!
Elphaba
Make me thin!
People of Oz
No one mourns the fat!
So we've got to make her
Elphaba
Ahhh!!!
People of Oz
Thin!