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Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
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100
Ways to Get Rejected and One More
By:
Eternal Love LJ
Chapter
1: 1-20
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Summary: The first twenty lines from James's bleeding heart. Oh, woe is James.
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James:
"Miss Evans, you look absolutely ravenous today!"
Lily:
"What!
James:
"Ravenous. You know . . ."
Lily:
"Do you mean ravishing?"
James:
"Umm . . . maybe."
Lily:
"You better."
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James:
"Me. You. Hogsmeade. Now."
Lily:
"Potter, get a life."
James:
"Fine. Me. You. My dorm. Now."
Lily:
"Sheesh."
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James:
"Hey, Evans, feeling all right? Because I know that I'm not.
See, I have a fever."
Lily:
"That's wonderful."
James:
"And the only cure is you!"
Lily:
Walks away.
James:
"Wait!"
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James:
"Evans, I have my head in a cloud. I'm thinking of you."
Lily:
"I hope it rains today."
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James:
"Evans! Come here often?"
Lily:
"What's that supposed to mean?"
James:
"I have no idea, but some people think it's a good pick-up
line."
Lily:
"Black?"
James:
"Yeah . . ."
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James:
"Oh! Where are my sunglasses?"
Lily:
"We're in the common room. Why do you need sunglasses?"
James:
"Because you are so luminous today."
Lily:
"Give up, Potter."
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Lily:
"Don't even start today, Potter."
James:
"But . . . all the time is a good time to ask you out."
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James:
"The string around my heart gets tighter and tighter every day
without you, my beautiful Evans."
Lily:
"Maybe it'll kill you one day."
James:
"I love you too, darling."
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James:
"Hark! I have an idea!"
Lily:
"Amazing."
James:
"Let's pretend that it's opposite day."
Lily:
"Let's start with you not asking me out."
James:
"Damn."
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James:
"Every day without your love is like a day without air."
Lily:
"I guess you'll die of lack of oxygen soon, then."
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James:
"Evans, you're full of sugar and spice and everything nice."
Lily:
"You know why you have brown eyes? Because you're full of
shit!"
James:
"I have hazel eyes, thank you very much!"
Lily:
"Yeah, I know, but saying you're full of shit because you have
hazel eyes doesn't make all that much sense."
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James:
"You smell."
Lily:
"Oh my God, like what?" Checks
underarms.
James:
"Good! You smell good! Merlin, Evans."
Lily:
"Wow, you're really
getting better at this, Potter."
James:
"Why, thank you, Evans!."
Lily:
"Sarcasm!"
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James:
"If I could chose just one word to describe you, I would chose
'supercalafragalisticexbealodocious'."
Lily:
"Umm, and why would you chose that word?"
James:
"Because . . . well, it's long, and it sounds cool . . ."
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James:
"Evans? I'm running out of pick-up lines."
Lily:
"Already?"
James:
"No! I was kidding!"
Lily:
"Darn."
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James:
Five seconds later.
"Are you wearing space pants? Because you're ass is out of
this world!"
Lily:
"Oh God."
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James:
"Evans! Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?"
Lily:
"Are you saying that I'm a prostitute?"
James:
"Well, I hope not, but if that's how it is . . ."
Lily:
"Get lost."
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James:
"Hey, Evans! I can see you."
Lily:
"That's great, Potter."
James:
"Great! How about tomorrow?"
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James:
"Hey, Evans, hey! Come here!"
Lily:
Walks over slowly.
"Yeah?"
James:
"There are 265 bones in your body. Want one more?"
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James:
"Evans, I have changed my name to Milk!"
Lily:
"Why?"
James:
"Because I do the body good!"
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James:
"You know, Evans, I barely even ask you out anymore. I just . .
. say pick-up lines."
Lily:
"Wow. No way."
James:
"Do you wanna go out?"
Lily:
"Yeah."
James:
"OH MY GOD, REALLY?"
Lily:
"No."
James:
"Drat."
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A/n: There you go! The first 20! I hope you liked it! Tell me your favorite.