A/N - this is the ff-dot-net version posted under a mule account so that my actual account will not be banned. Enjoy and please review. If you question my identity, that's fine, as I have this posted under a different username on another site. Simply e-mail that author and reference this story. She is me, so there will be no problems. -mhmuletini

--

Kurama picked up his keys and headed for the door to his mother's house. "Goodnight, Mother. I'll see you next weekend," he said softly as his mother approached for a hug. Every week he visited Shiori for dinner. It was one of the few times she ever saw him alone. Usually her son could only be found in the company of his mate, the diminutive demon, Hiei. But these weekly lunches were the quality time that mother and son spent together, and Shiori loved every minute of it.

This week, as she released her son, he did not let go right away. "Mother," he began. "If anything...happens, please do not blame Hiei."

"What?" Shiori responded, confused.

"There is something all demons experience. Whatever you may think of it, please know that it is normal and I understand and welcome it," Kurama replied enigmatically.

Narrowing her eyes, Shiori regarded her son for a moment. "I trust you, Shuuichi, but you have me concerned. If you or Hiei need anything, please let me know."

"I will, Mother. Good night." With that, the kitsune turned to walk the short distance to the house he shared with his mate.

When Kurama arrived home, Hiei was still out. Although they enjoyed every minute they shared, sometimes each demon needed time to himself. While the fox was visiting his human family, Hiei would flit about the human world. The nimble demon practically flew over the housetops, alighting on treetops, telephone poles, and the like. Often he would find a secluded glade and practice kata with his sword. Always he returned to the house late, sweaty, and hot (in more ways than one).

Kurama had only been home a few minutes when he heard movements upstairs in the master bedroom. Hiei preferred to come and go through the large, sliding glass doors that opened from their bedroom to their terrace overlooking the backyard. Sure enough, after only a few more minutes the master bathroom shower turned on. Smiling, Kurama headed up the stairs.

Hiei was washing the shampoo from his hair when he felt his mate enter the room. Smiling, the hiyoukai slowed down and started massaging his head luxuriously. When the suds finally ran out, he took some body wash and began lathering up the bath pouf Kurama had gotten him. Slowly, he ran the soapy puff over his arms and chest, careful to keep his back to the small slit between the shower curtain and the wall. He could feel green eyes devouring the sight of his slippery, naked body.

Kurama had paused to peek in through the side of the shower. He knew Hiei was putting on a show for him, and he watched eagerly. Although aloof and distant in public, Hiei was actually a very sensual creature. He loved to be touched and cuddled, and his favorite pastime was "pleasuring" his fox. The show was part of that.

Finally, Kurama couldn't take it anymore. Divesting himself of his clothing, he quickly entered the shower with Hiei and began to wash the fire demon's back.

"Took you long enough," Hiei commented dryly, leaning back into his lover's touch.

"You were too fun to watch, Love," Kurama replied, pouring more of the soap into his hands and working his way down to Hiei's rump. As usual, Hiei leaned forward to give the fox better access. They had discovered fairly quickly that the body wash made a very nice lubricant, what with all the moisturizers added to it. But tonight, Kurama did not start to prepare his lover.

"Not tonight. I want to try something new," the kitsune whispered into Hiei's ear. They finished washing each other without their typical shower-play and likewise dried each other. Curious, Hiei sat on the bed while Kurama brushed out his still-damp, red hair.

When the fox finally approached, Hiei slid backwards, waiting for his fox to pounce on him. Instead, Kurama sat on the edge of the bed. "Hiei," he began. "Would you like to try something new?" Hiei looked at the kitsune, waiting for him to continue.

"Would you like to be seme tonight?" Kurama asked. Hiei just stared at him for a moment.

"Why?" the hiyoukai finally responded.

"I thought perhaps you would like to try it. I don't mind. I would like you to make love to me," Kurama said, not quite making eye contact with his lover.

"I don't know, um, well, I don't know how," Hiei responded.

Swallowing heavily, Kurama raised his eyes to meet Hiei's. "Your instinct will guide you, Love."

Hiei knew Kurama was not shy around him. The fox's behavior tonight was unusual. Hiei considered a moment before he asked, "Have you been uke before, Fox?"

That caught Kurama off guard. He bit his lip for a moment before he replied, "Only once." The distant look in his eyes told far more than that.

"Kuronue?" Hiei asked. Kurama nodded. Leaning forward, Hiei's lips found Kurama's, offering comfort and love. "Let me love you tonight," Hiei whispered as they parted slightly. With a nervous smile, Kurama lay back onto the bed and allowed Hiei to slide on top of him.

Hiei knew that Kurama had been with Kuronue many years ago. Although unsure of the exact date, the hiyoukai knew it had been a very, very long time since Kurama had been taken, and that the body Kurama now inhabited had never been taken. Hiei determined that he would be as gentle as Kurama had been with him his first time, and began to kiss his mate lovingly. Slowly, the fire demon's small hands began to wander across the kitsune's strong chest.

Kurama arched into Hiei's touch, both craving and fearing what would happen this night. Kurama had spoken truly when he said Hiei's instincts would guide him, but he had never specified to where. Many, if not all, male demons experienced a violent release of energy the first time they dominated another sexually. Kurama had never been on the receiving end of this outburst as Kuronue was not chaste prior to meeting him, but the fox had experienced it from the giving end during his own first encounter, over one thousand years earlier. But he knew if he told Hiei about this then the smaller demon would refuse to mount him, and he wanted, no, he needed to share himself with his mate this way at least once.

Hiei began kissing lower and lower down Kurama's jaw and neck, tracing a path to the tip of the fox's chin. He warmed his small hands enough to tease the fox's sensitive skin and slowly dragged a hand to Kurama's left nipple. The kitsune gasped as the heated fingers began rolling and pinching the pink skin, causing the bud to harden and increasing its sensitivity. Hiei began licking a path down Kurama's throat, stopping only to suckle on the soft flesh just under the fox's Adam's Apple. This spot was vulnerable, and both demons knew it. To have an enemy bite here was instant death. Between mates, however, it was trust. Kurama tilted his head back slightly and Hiei grazed his teeth lightly over the skin, hard enough for Kurama to feel them, but light enough to not leave a mark. It was the depth of their bond that they could share this sensation: one trusting the other to not bite, and the other choosing to be so gentle.

After a few more seconds of sucking the delicate flesh, Hiei continued his trek down Kurama's chest. Tracing the strong muscles hidden within the kitsune's delicate frame, Hiei slowly made his way to the pert nub he rolled between his fingers. His other hand caressed Kurama's right ribs, rubbing and stroking the redhead's side and keeping him from arching too far.

When the wet sensation of Hiei's lips replaced the warm tweaking of his fingers, Kurama could barely contain his moans. Immediately Hiei pulled his head back and blew onto the wet, sensitized skin. After the warm fingers and hot, moist mouth, the cool air across his nipple made Kurama groan aloud, pressing his head back into the pillow. Hiei looked up at his mate and stared for a moment. Never before had he seen such a wanton sight. Kurama was lying on his back, his neck muscles taut as they pressed his head deeper into the red halo of his hair, fanned out on the pillow beneath him. His green eyes were closed and his lips were parted to accommodate his harsh, heavy breathing. Small beads of sweat covered the fox's brow. His arms, that had begun wrapped around Hiei, were spread out to the sides, fists clenched in the sheets in response to the barrage of stimulation his mate was giving him. Taking in this beautiful picture, Hiei silently continued his ministrations to the body below him.

Starting at the same nipple, Hiei began to suckle in earnest, drawing another moan from his pinned mate. The youkai's left hand traced its way around Kurama's ribs to find his other nipple, and began to twirl and manipulate that bud until it was as red and erect as its twin.

Kurama began to recover from the sensations Hiei was giving him. He wrapped his arms around his mate, threading his fingers into Hiei's short, spiky hair. The fox also wrapped his legs around the smaller demon's body in a effort to bring contact to the place he craved it most. When he did this, he could feel Hiei's lips form a smile around his nipple. Not moving his mouth, Hiei asked, "Impatient, Fox?"

The sensation of Hiei's moving lips and the vibrations from his deep voice tickled and excited Kurama even more. "Yes," he gasped, trying to pull Hiei even closer. Deciding to play a little, Hiei resisted Kurama's tightening grip.

"Not yet, Fox," the hiyoukai breathed, releasing the kitsune's chest and continuing his downward journey. When he reached Kurama's navel he again paused, dipping his tongue into the divot, and dragging it outwards in spirals to cover the fox's tight stomach. Kurama kept his grip in Hiei's hair tight. His breathing became rougher, and his moans more frequent. The fox released his grip around Hiei with his legs, instead spreading them for fuller contact with his mate.

Hiei spent a long time kissing and licking Kurama's stomach. The tight, fit muscles rippled with pleasure as his hot tongue and breath teased the skin over them lightly. Kurama's excitement was well displayed slightly further down his body. Feeling the pressure rising against his chest, Hiei decided it was time to move along.

Sliding downward, Hiei was careful to keep his body in full contact with that of his mate. The result was that Hiei's chest dragged over Kurama's already aroused groin with maddening slowness. The friction caused Kurama to call out hoarsely. "Hiei!" the fox blurted out, unable to control the bucking of his hips. Hiei moved his hands from Kurama's nipples to his hips, pinning them down and preventing them from moving.

"Already, Fox? We have not yet even begun," Hiei teased, halting his movement.

"Please!" Kurama begged. "How did you get...so good...at this?" The fox murmured between gasps, rocking back and forth slightly to try to regain the friction between Hiei and himself.

"It's nothing more than what you do to me, Fox," Hiei replied with a smirk, relieved that Kurama was receiving so much pleasure. He wanted more than anything to please his fox, and seeing Kurama's face in sweat-beaded ecstasy turned him on even more than the moans and gasps he heard. Slowly, torturously Hiei resumed his descent.

When his chin reached the apex of Kurama's thighs, Hiei again looked at Kurama's face. Green eyes watched him back, eagerly awaiting whatever pleasure he had to offer and silently begging him for more. Hiei readjusted his grip on Kurama's hips and very slowly, very deliberately took Kurama into his mouth.

Kurama's entire world existed of nothing more than the hot, wet feel of Hiei's mouth caressing him and swallowing him. Unable to buck his hips, Kurama had to settle for just moving his legs and curling his toes. His fingers, still threaded in Hiei's hair, clenched and unclenched in time with his moans of pleasure. Pressing his head deeper into the pillow, Kurama arched his back seeking more from Hiei, but the hiyoukai's firm grip on hips prevented him from rushing. Kurama could move every part of his body except the part that needed more, and try as he might he could not rush Hiei's agonizingly slow pace.

Hiei knew he was driving his fox insane. The flailing and flexing of the rest of Kurama's body told him how much his fox needed this. But since he was on top tonight, he chose the pace, and he chose slow. After swallowing only the tip of his fox's length, Hiei pulled back and released it to blow cooler air across the wet flesh.

"Uuunghh!" Kurama cried out. "Gods, Hiei, PLEASE!" The fox's whole body was writhing and shaking, with the exception of his pinned hips. They were stationary, held firmly in place.

Kurama's lusty, desperate plea resounded through Hiei's ears and shot straight to his groin. Almost viciously, he claimed Kurama's entire length with his hungry mouth, bobbing and sucking at a pace too fast to comprehend. The sensations of friction and suction blended in Kurama's lust-soaked mind, and he screamed his pleasure, arching his back like a bow. Before he could release, however, the hiyoukai stopped and pulled away.

Kurama's sweaty body relaxed into the sheets, shaking and shivering with pleasure. His arousal was almost painful, and he wanted his mate to join with him to relieve that pain. Suddenly he became aware of an intrusion into his body.

Hiei had gotten the lotion from the nightstand and had coated the fingers on his right hand. Slowly he pressed the first into his mate. Before, as he sucked and caressed Kurama's body, his intention had been to tease and arouse his fox. Now his intentions were gentle. He knew his fox's body was about to experience something completely new, and he was careful to gently and fully prepare his mate. His own body had felt considerable discomfort the first time he was violated, and he knew Kurama's human body, even though it was energized by the fox spirit's youki, would feel the pain much more acutely than Hiei's demon body did. Carefully he added a second, slick finger.

Kurama felt the intrusion grow and began scissoring. His excitement grew, as did his fears. But he trusted his mate. He just hoped Hiei remained at least somewhat in control of himself. Kurama could not ponder this for long as he was distracted by the addition of a third finger, spreading him wider and stretching him to an almost painful extent. His discomfort must have been apparent on his face because the movement stopped.

"Are you sure about this, Fox?" Hiei asked when he saw Kurama's expression.

"Yes, Hiei. I want you to love me. And Hiei?" Kurama paused to make sure he had the fire demon's undivided attention. "I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, Fox," Hiei replied, removing his fingers from Kurama's body and aligning himself with the fox's entrance. Slowly Hiei moved upwards, entering the form beneath him.

Kurama closed his eyes and took deep breaths. This hurt! He wanted to join with Hiei and to share himself in ways he had denied others. Hiei was his mate, and he felt that his body was Hiei's as well. The fire demon felt likewise, and they shared themselves freely with each other. This was a new and exciting dimension to their love. But the underlying fear of what was about to happen tainted Kurama's pleasure and heightened his discomfort.

Hiei continued to advance slowly and steadily, knowing that anything else would prolong his fox's pain. Finally he was fully sheathed within Kurama's body. The heat and pressure were unlike anything he had ever experienced before. Deeply buried under the physical pleasure and emotional attachment a feeling of power and dominance began to awaken. Hiei ignored these, worrying only about the comfort of his lover. When Kurama finally opened his eyes, Hiei looked into the green orbs for a response.

When Kurama opened his eyes and looked at his lover, he saw only concern reflected in the crimson depths of Hiei's gaze. With a gentle smile, he nodded for Hiei to continue.

Taking his cue from Kurama, Hiei began to slowly rock his hips, alternately pressing deeper into and then rolling back from Kurama's body. The pace was slow and the movements small. After a few moments, Kurama became acclimated to the sensations and wrapped his legs around Hiei again, moving in sync with Hiei, and relaxing. Hiei's motions became larger, penetrating deeper into Kurama. Any discomfort faded quickly as pleasure claimed its place.

Hiei slipped his hand down between their bodies and gripped Kurama's most intimate area. Moving his hand to match his body, he began to pump Kurama. The fox tilted his head back and released a long, lusty moan laden with pleasure. Hiei's body jerked at the sound, driving him much further into Kurama, his hand squeezing the fox much more roughly. Kurama gasped at the sudden discomfort, but it was only momentary. Hiei reigned in his zeal and recovered the pleasurable rhythm quickly. The fire demon did not even notice his brief lapse in control.

Lost again in pleasure, Kurama shifted slightly and put his feet down on the bed to either side of Hiei. Pushing with his legs, he tilted his pelvis slightly to allow better access for Hiei's thrusts. Feeling this, Hiei thrust harder again, pushing deeper into his mate. The feelings of power and dominance resurfaced, and Hiei began to thrust harder, removing his hand from Kurama and using both arms to brace himself up.

Kurama felt the change in the rhythm of their lovemaking and knew Hiei's instincts were taking over. Keeping his eyes closed, he just tried to relax and let them run their course.

Lust and power warred in Hiei's mind as he felt his control slipping. Without realizing it, his need for more contact and more gratification took hold of him. Shifting, he grabbed Kurama's legs and threw them over his shoulders, pounding relentlessly into the fox. Kurama felt a stab of pain shoot up his back as his body received the thrusts, threatening to give if the pace and depth did not decrease.

"Hiei?" Kurama gasped out, opening his eyes, afraid of what he would see. When he looked at his mate, his fears were confirmed.

Hiei's eyes were glassed over. The depth and concern were hidden beneath a sheen of lust driven domination. In response to Kurama's inquiry and the tightening of the body beneath him, Hiei pressed the fox's legs closer to his chest. The hiyoukai was like an animal now, unable to control his reactions and only doing what felt good to him. When Kurama tried to shift slightly to alleviate some of the pain, Hiei drove his claws into the fox's hips, gripping tightly enough to bruise. Kurama's cry of pain only drove him higher, as did the smell of fresh blood. Practically folding the kitsune in half, Hiei pressed the entire weight of his body onto Kurama's legs and began thrusting harder and faster into the fox's tight entrance.

Kurama could barely breathe. He felt pressure building in his body, but it was not the sweet pressure of impending release. Instead, it was the pressure of muscles and tissues straining to keep their form under a flood of torment. The pain in his lower back was radiating out, and he felt that something had to give soon or he would explode. The pain suddenly shot out through his body with a rending, tearing sensation that began at his entrance. Unable to stop himself, he cried out in pain.

Hiei felt the tear, felt his thrusts become less impeded, and felt the warm liquid that now lubricated his penetration. Kurama's cry enraged him, and moved his hand to the fox's upper arms, pinning the kitsune and drawing more blood.

"Hiei!" Kurama called out, still feeling the agony from his lower back spread throughout his body. This only enraged the fire demon further, and he began to tear at the kitsune's flesh, alternately striking with fists, open hands, and claws.

Kurama tried to relax as the blows rained down on him. He knew Hiei was no longer conscious, nor was the demon in control of his body. An occasional cry did escape the fox, but Kurama knew that to remain quiet and still would end the agony sooner.

Hiei had stopped striking the fox and was concentrating on thrusting, on slaking the lust that had claimed his conscious mind. Lifting Kurama's hips and torso off the bed, putting all of the fox's body weight on his neck, Hiei rose to his knees and continued forcing his way deeper into the fox's body. One particularly vicious thrust caused Kurama to cry out again. In retaliation, Hiei dropped Kurama's torso, grabbed the fox's bangs in his right hand and forced the fox's head back into the pillow hard. Leaning front, still joined to the kitsune, Hiei sank his sharp teeth into the fox's chest only an inch above the nipple he had so lovingly caressed earlier. When Kurama cried out again, Hiei released his hold in the fox's hair, dragging his claws down and rending the soft flesh. He clawed four deep lines down Kurama's forehead and left eye, down his cheek, over his jaw and down his chest, ending at the deep teeth marks. Kurama shrieked as he felt this, keeping his eye closed, afraid the scratches may have destroyed it.

The keening wail seemed to spur Hiei on even further. Leaning back, pulling out of and away from his mauled lover, he again grabbed hold of the fox's hips. Instead of pinning him, he rotated them; forcing Kurama's damaged body to turn face down. Kurama flailed, trying to stop, trying to lift his chest from the bed. He knew it would be unpleasant while he and Hiei endured this rite of passage, but the fox was close to panic. He had never been taken from behind before, and he knew Hiei had the power to kill him or worse. He did not have time to consider what may be worse, as a searing pain again shot forth from his lower back as Hiei penetrated him again with no preparation. Crying out, Kurama felt Hiei's' claws tear into his flesh and Hiei's sharp teeth sink into the center of his back, nearly crushing his spine. By this time Kurama's previous arousal had fled, and now he felt no pleasure, only searing pain.

The fox tried to contain himself as his body was again ravaged, but found it harder and harder not to scream. He could not see Hiei behind him, but he clearly felt every thrust, gauge, and tear the demon inflicted upon him. Kurama tried to lay still, thankful his head was turned enough so he could breathe. Kurama lost all control, however, when Hiei's hand slammed into the pillow before his face. The hand and arm showed a distinct green tinge. Kurama tried to get up, to shake off his mate, but he was too weak. Sharp claws digging into his ribs at his side and teeth rending his flesh on his back were the last sensations he remembered.

--

When Kurama awoke his head swam in a haze of pain. It was dark, and he felt a heavy weight on his back. He tried to move, but several pains assaulted his senses at once. The split-open, full feeling informed him that his mate was still joined to him, and the claws sinking deeper in between his ribs indicated that Hiei's lust-haze had not worn off yet; even in sleep the hiyoukai dominated him totally. Giving up, Kurama allowed oblivion to claim him once more.

--

When Hiei awoke the sun was shining in the window. The hiyoukai did not open his eyes. He was comfortable. The bed was much warmer than usual and seemed to almost form fit his body. All around him the scent of his beloved fox embraced him. Hiei snuggled deeper into the bed, licking his lips. A warm, coppery taste greeted him. Licking more, he tested the taste, trying to place it. Hiei was not, by nature a blood-drinking demon, nor did he eat human flesh, but this taste seemed familiar. It tasted like, like...

Hiei's eyes flew open. The taste was Kurama's blood. With a start the demon sat up. He was quite surprised when he realized what he was laying on was not his mattress. Looking down, he gasped and drew back. A sticky, pulling feeling greeted him as he withdrew from the unconscious fox beneath him. Turning to the right, he slipped off the kitsune and onto the mattress. Horrified, he surveyed the form in the bed with him.

Kurama was out cold. His shallow breathing showed him to be alive. His body was bruised and cut all over. The soft, white skin was discolored and swollen. Teeth marks and claw marks littered his back and shoulders above the blankets, which draped over his body from the waist down. He faced away from Hiei. The fire demon reached out to his mate, but stopped when he saw his own hands. Blood, Kurama's blood, coated his hands and crusted under his claws. Sitting up on his knees, Hiei stared at his hands in disbelief. Could he have hurt his fox like this? Dropping his gaze, Hiei was nauseated at the sight that greeted him. His entire genital area was also covered in blood. With a shaking hand, he drew back the covers to expose the rest of Kurama body.

Kurama's rear and the sheets all around it were red with the kitsune's blood. It was obvious to Hiei what had happened: he had torn his mate badly and had not stopped when the damage was inflicted. Shaking even more, Hiei reached for Kurama's arm to turn him over slightly, to see his face. Hiei's stomach lurched when he saw it.

Four long, deep gashes marred the fox's face, crossing completely over one eye that was now crusted shut with blood and tears. Hiei reached up to smooth back Kurama's hair, but stopped when his hand was positioned over the gashes. They matched his claws. He had disfigured his mate like this. All the wounds on Kurama, the teeth marks, claw marks, bruises, everything, was his doing. Releasing Kurama, Hiei jumped up and sprinted to the bathroom just in time to be violently sick. When he was done, he quickly washed to fox's blood off himself and drew a warm bath.

Returning to the bedroom, he gathered the still slumbering fox in his arms and carefully took him to the waiting bath. He set Kurama gently into tub of water, careful not to put any pressure on the base of the kitsune's spine. Taking Kurama's bath pouf, he slowly began to clean the blood from his mate. As he cleaned Kurama's abdomen, he realized that there was no evidence of Kurama's completion. The fox had not climaxed the night before.

Kurama began to stir as Hiei continued to cleanse his body. Shifting his head slightly, Kurama tried to look at his mate. "Hiei?" he whispered softly, slurring the word through his uncooperative lips.

"I'm here, Fox. Relax," Hiei replied, continuing his washing. When Kurama tried to sit up further Hiei restrained his gently. "Don't move, Kurama," he said softly.

Kurama tried to look at Hiei, but his left eye refused to open. When his right eye finally found the hiyoukai, the demon was out of focus. When he saw Kurama looking at him, Hiei stopped for a moment. Putting down the pouf, Hiei picked up a clean washcloth and dipped it into the warm water.

"Stay still, and do not open your left eye," Hiei instructed as he carefully laid the wet cloth over the gashes on Kurama's face. The fox hissed in discomfort. "I'm sorry," Hiei whispered, gently repositioning the cloth. Slowly, he continued to clean Kurama's wounds until each was done but one. Hiei did not want to clean that one; the one he had inflicted so cruelly. His hand shaking, Hiei just sat there, holding Kurama in the water.

"It's okay," Kurama murmured, sensing Hiei's reluctance. Wordlessly, Hiei submerged the cloth and began to clean Kurama's backside. When the fox was finally clean, Hiei drained the water and gathered the fox in a towel. Holding his mate close, the fire demon passed through their bedroom and went to a guest room, to a bed that was not soaked in blood. Carefully he arranged Kurama on his right side and covered him up to his neck. Kurama sighed deeply and relaxed into the soft mattress.

Seeing Kurama resting, Hiei rose to leave. He had gotten to the door when Kurama's thin voice reached him. "Hiei?" the fox asked.

Standing naked in the doorway, his back to his injured mate, Hiei only turned his head to speak, unable to look at the one he had betrayed so cruelly. "You need to rest and I need to leave," he said softly.

"What?" Kurama asked, trying to shift to sit up, but unable to do so without much pain.

"I don't recall what happened but it is unforgivable. It will never happen again. Goodbye, Fo, Kurama," Hiei said with a sickening finality.

"Hiei, wait! Come back," Kurama asked, knowing with a sickening certainty what Hiei planned to do to himself. When Hiei started to walk away without looking back, Kurama forced himself to sit upright despite the agony. "Hiei! Don't leave me like this!" he called out desperately. Hiei paused.

"I did this to you," Hiei said softly, still not turning to meet Kurama's gaze.

"I know," Kurama admitted.

"And it will never happen again," Hiei concluded.

"It won't," Kurama agreed. "It only ever happens once. Please come back."

At this, Hiei turned partially to look at his mate, a look of confusion on his face. "I betrayed you, Kurama. I took your love from you against your will and hurt you. I turned something beautiful into something horrible. I defiled you. I am a monster."

"Hiei, I knew this would happen," Kurama interjected. "I allowed it to happen. I am the one who betrayed you by not sharing this knowledge ahead of time. Please, come back to me," Kurama said softly, almost begging. Hiei turned to fully face the kitsune, still confused.

"You knew?" the fire demon asked.

"Hiei, all male demons get lost in their lust the first time they sexually dominate another. I knew you would lose control. I also knew that if I told you this would happen you would never make love to me. I wanted to share myself with you, even at that expense. Please, come back here," Kurama explained.

"Why? You never lost your control with me," Hiei objected.

"While this body was virgin, it is human and does not lose control like a demon body would. When I was a demon..." Kurama shuddered. "I killed the first demon I rutted with, Hiei. She was young. So was I. I was too weak to claim a strong lover, so I took what I could find. When I came to, all there was a broken corpse and a lake of blood. The things I did scare me, even now."

"But I do not remember what I did," Hiei said softly, averting his gaze.

"You will. It will come back to you slowly. All male demons go through this. As for why, I can only surmise. Demons are promiscuous by nature. Most seek sexual fulfillment before they are fully mature. You were different because of your heritage and upbringing. Koorime reject sex in all its forms, and the bandits that raised you were probably not your first choice of lovers." At this Hiei snorted his assent. He had killed quite a few of the bandits because they tried to bed him. He had actually never had the urge to bed another until he met Kurama. That could be attributed to the frigid nature of his mother's people.

Kurama continued, "Male demons are usually very weak the first time they have intercourse, and so they can only tame a weak mate. This lust-haze is probably an evolved response to keep the population of demons in check and to kill the weaker demons before they can reproduce. Survival of the fittest, so to speak."

Hiei now looked up at Kurama. "You've been hanging around the humans too much to give it that much thought," he said.

"You may be right. But either way, what happened is not your fault, Hiei," Kurama said.

"But I still hurt you," Hiei insisted stubbornly.

"And I let you," Kurama replied. "I let you take me, Hiei. You did not force me; I consented, knowing what was to come. And it will never happen again because you have experienced it now." Kurama could tell from Hiei's expression that he was not convinced. "Fine. Then at least agree that it was as much my fault as it was yours and get over here," Kurama said.

Hiei stayed where he was. "I hurt you, though," he said.

"Yes, you did. And you inflicted the wounds using your youki. So only your energy can help me heal," Kurama said. "Unless you want me to scar like this?"

Hiei looked up at Kurama, fresh guilt and self-hatred flooding his features. "Don't start, Hiei. Because we are true mates we have shared our youki. That is the only reason yours will help me heal, because my body recognizes and accepts it. If we were not mates I would not be able to heal. If we were not mates, Hiei, you would have killed me. The fact that I am alive shows that you did restrain yourself."

One final question nagged at Hiei. "Why did I never know this? How did I grow to maturity with no idea this would happen? I should have known and I should have refused you, Kurama!" he spat out, beginning to shake slightly.

"Because, Hiei, your childhood was never a childhood, even by demon standards. Your mother's people were completely closed about sexual interactions, and you inherited a lot of their ways, even though they discarded you. Your own mother did seek a mate, which was against her instincts, so how could you, the product of a confused union, not be confused yourself? Hiei, it's over. I will heal with your help, and we can love each other freely from now on," Kurama explained. The fatigue and his injuries were starting to affect him, and his head began to swim. He wanted his mate's embrace, but Hiei was being stubborn. Kurama's head lolled to the side and he felt himself falling back onto the bed.

Strong arms caught him before he hit the pillow, and gently the arms guided him to a more comfortable laying position. The blankets were tucked up to his chin, but instead of being alone, Kurama felt another behind him.

"I don't understand why you let me hurt you, Kurama, but I will try to help you heal. I love you," Hiei whispered as he snuggled behind the injured fox.

"I love you, too," Kurama replied.

--

A/N-I DO NOT in ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM CONDONE NONCONSENTUAL SEX ACTS!!! If someone forces you or hurts you against your will, you need to get help, no matter how many times they apologize or promise it will never happen again!

That being said: these are fictional characters and they are demons. I believe that demon sex would not be as pretty as I usually write it, and I believe Kurama is a masochist, so this story evolved in my head and kept begging to be let out. So here it is. There will be a follow up chapter at some point, but for now I'm a little exhausted from writing this. Please review.