Summary: The media won't leave his love life alone, so Kaiba embarks on a plan to shut them up once and for all. But when what seemed to be an escape plan turns into a quest on finding true love, what is a CEO to do? Puppyshipping. Shounen Ai. R&R.

A/N: Haha, been typing this baby up since the 7th chapter of "Find Me". I'm so evil.

This story came to me when I heard my brother was courting a new girl. Haha. You know how weird that is? My brother is somehow like Kaiba (because he is a cruel prodigy)… and the girl is somehow like Jou with her being bubbly and happy (which basically makes her the only girl I approve of)… so I was like: "WHAT IF KAIBA COURTED JOU?!" XDDD!

So yeah, I think I'm gonna have fun writing this story.

YGO Characters: -stare-
Blank: What?
YGO Characters: o.o; Nothing…

Warning: Shounen Ai, OOC, Mild Cursing. Wee little bit of character bashing (early apologies 'bout that. Lol.)

Disclaimer: You'd think the two would've been making out in Kaiba's Jet by now.

Pairing(s): Seto/Jou, Mentions of Yami/Hikari

Story Notes:

1) -.-.-Page Break-.-.-

Courting the Dog

Pick the Breed

Kaiba Corp.'s, Kaiba Seto is BISEXUAL?!

Those words were the only ones that repeated on the headlines of every newspaper and TV station on Earth. So what if the CEO was bi? His sales didn't even go down. Hell, it went up since the male fans knew they had at least one percent chance on getting his heart.

What was the fuss over it?

Well, for one, almost everyone Kaiba meets goes all grabby on him. Fan girls and boys bow down on his every whim. But—what was so bad about that?

Ironically, he gets linked to every person he's caught with. And this is the final straw the Kaiba Seto takes. But how does he get the media to shut up?

Of course, he had a plan…

…And that was to get into a relationship.

A fake one.

With who? That's what the young prodigy didn't know. Lucky enough for him, he has a conniving little brother before hand. Kaiba Mokuba.

"So, let's see…" The raven child said as he paced back and forth in front of his brother's desk. "You need to be paired with someone who you can absolutely not fall in love with."

The older Kaiba only nodded. God knows the guy never really believed in romance—waste of time, he believed.

"Uhm… Yami and Yugi…" Mokuba said thoughtfully. "No, it's possible you'd like them cause of the thing with the jealousy."

The brunet only kept quiet.

"Plus, they're together." The younger one huffed. "So are Marik and Malik, Bakura and Ryou…"

"Please, Mokuba." Seto finally spoke. "I'd rather be caught dead than date those lunatics."

"Kujaku Mai?"

Then there was silence.

"Nah…"

"No."

Mai was… Mai… and Kaiba never really liked women with… well developed bodies. Not to mention the age gap. Kaiba was what? Seventeen? And Mai was… twenty-four? Twenty-five?

So, that'd be a 'no'.

"Anzu?" Blink.

"…You think?" Arched eyebrow.

"Not really."

Who ever thought finding the perfect person for the CEO was hard?

"How about Jou's sister?" Mokuba blushed. "Shizuka!"

"Mokie," Seto sighed. "Don't you have a crush on her?"

"Worth a shot!" Grin. 'Thank you, God!'

Shizuka might've worked. She was young, nice, smart and respectable. Okay, maybe Kaiba could fall in love or grow attached with her. Plus, he knew Mokuba liked the young lass. So why take her away? Not to mention a certain blond puppy would never let it down.

"Otogi?"

"…Too vain."

It's true.

"How 'bout that Amelda guy?"

If Kaiba was a normal teenager, he would've fallen off the chair. But since he had to be the CEO, all he could do was look at his younger brother strangely.

"That's a 'no'." Mokuba sighed. "Pegasus?"

Kaiba twitched—was he still alive?

"Ishizu?"

"I don't think so, kiddo."

It wasn't that Kaiba didn't like the woman; he just didn't like to be with someone who can randomly see the future (not that he believed or anything) and talk in riddles—just like that strange Shadi-fellow.

"Big brother…" Mokuba said in a sing-song tone. "How 'bout me?"

Kaiba just had to hear this as he sipped his coffee, which, in the end, made him spit it out and gape at his younger brother.

"I was kidding!" Mokuba laughed at his brother's reaction.

"Don't joke like that."

"Hehe…" The younger one went back to thinking. "Uhm… how about… man! Looking for the right person for you sure is tougher than it originally looked!"

Yeah, well… that's what you get for being a coldhearted bastard.

"Dartz? Sugoroku?"

"Why would you think I'd go for those two?"

"I don't knooooowwww!!" Mokuba whined. He didn't know who or what anymore. "Uh…"

The CEO sighed. He knew his brother was tired.

"It's alright, Mokie…" Pause. "You can stop now."

"No!"

"But—"

"No! I wanna help, and I will!"

Well, Mokuba really did take after his brother now, didn't he? This only made Seto smile. Mokuba reminded him of his self in a happier way. Always determined and will never give up no matter how many times you'd persuade the kid.

And it scared him at times.

"How about…"

Mokuba's voice soon trailed off as Kaiba decided to think thing through. He knew very well that his little brother would not stay with him after a span of time. The kid needs to learn to independent. And he also knows that he'd need a companion anytime soon. Something a certain Kaiba Seto would seize to admit.

"Big brother!"

"Huh?"

"You aren't listening to me!"

"Sorry, Mokie."

The raven child, then, placed his palms on the table top. He has a serious face on. And a very cunning smirk—one that only a Kaiba can carry out.

"Siegfried."

Silence.

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Well, he's overly jealous… so I thought… " Mokuba grinned. "There must be sexual tension somewhere!"

"Where do you get these?"

"School!"

Kaiba could only stare at his, once, innocent little brother.

And Mokuba only batted his eyelashes.

"Fine, all that's left are… Honda and Jou!" Mokuba pouted. "That's the last two!"

"…Those two goons?"

"Yes."

'A fish and a dog…!' Curse. "Jou, then." More cursing. "If I have to date an animal, then it must be mammal."

The raven haired teen grinned. Finally, his brother goes on a real date! Fake as it is, you never know! Seto might just like this person.

"Yey!" He, then, went around the desk to hug his older brother. "I'm happy for you!"

"It's a fake one, Mokie."

"So…?"

Man, Jou so doesn't know what's coming to him.

To Be Continued

A/N: Review, please! Like it? Hate it? Tell me!!! Haha, sorry if you're offended with the minor character bashing...! n.n;;;