When Mungojerrie met Rumpleteazer.
Mungojerrie was scaling up the side of the big white house. He looked up and felt the wind on his face, just a few more inches. There, he was on top of the huge house. Looking around he saw quite a few possible means of entry, first the chimneys then there was a sky light leading straight into a bedroom and to his left a boarded up attic window. Surveying the scene with his expert eye Jerrie decided one of the chimneys would be his best option. He chose the largest and pulling his satchel further onto his shoulder got ready to jump.
What Jerrie didn't know was that another cat was shimmying up the drain pipe on the other side of the house. Rumpleteazer gripped the thin pipe with her paws and eventually leapt onto the flat roof. She gave a satisfied sigh and retracted her claws.
Jerrie turned in surprise, he was sure he heard a noise. Sniffing the air cautiously he crept closer to the other side of the roof. He routinely surveyed the area, looking for window cleaners and the likes. His eyes hit something half hidden by a chimney, Jerrie shook his head, it couldn't be, but he was sure that behind that Chimney he could see a tail. Closer he crept keeping low to the ground, he saw the tail swish and then it disappeared. Startled the tom ran round to the chimney; nothing the spot was completely empty. Sighing Jerrie sat down, this was his big job, he'd been working up to it for weeks and nothing was going to ruin it now!
Meanwhile Rumpleteazer had been picking flaky green paint off her paws when her sensitive nose caught a scent. Quickly she looked around, thinking it must be some fat house cat the queen ran from behind the chimney and hid. She did see another cat, quickly running to the spot she had just vanished from. But it was no fat house cat; actually it was quite a handsome tom. She saw him sit down and he appeared to be doing some deep thinking, when he had apparently come to a decision he suddenly got up and walked towards the biggest chimney on the roof ready to jump.
Rumpleteazer quickly emerged from her hiding place, "Oh no you don't!" She shouted, startled Jerrie looked round; he smirked when he saw her,
"Move along love, this is my spot."
Rumpleteazer hissed,
"Oh really, and who was here first?"
"Me!" Both the cats shouted. Jerrie rolled his eyes and peered down the chimney,
"I really don't have time for this." He sighed and got ready to jump.
Rumpleteazer gathered her thoughts, it just so happened that coming up from the other side of the building she had seen something that this tom had not. As she had carefully made her way up the house, she'd noticed through one of the windows that a man had been about to light a fire, the fire at the bottom of the chimney that the tom was about to jump down. She watched him take a deep breath, she could either let him jump in to the waiting inferno and be burnt to a crisp, or warn him and save his life. It wasn't a hard decision for Teazer who was by nature a caring cat.
"Wait!" She shouted, the tom barely looked up, "I wouldn't do that if I were you!"
Jerrie scowled this queen was beginning to be a real pain in the bum.
"What you going to do, stab me with your tail?" He regarded the queen with mounting dislike and after one last evil glare he jumped. Rumpleteazer let out a screech, in a sudden reaction she grabbed the fast retreating ginger tail and fell with Jerrie down the chimney, screaming all the way.
"Ssh! They'll hear you." Jerrie swiped at the queen who had attached herself to his tail.
"That's the point!" Rumpleteazer yelled and began to scream even louder.
Luckily the family did hear the two cats. The man was knelt by the fire match lit in hand when he heard the racket from the cats. His two little girls presently stopped fighting and paused to listen. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer arrived in the grate in a flurry of soot. Rumple gave a cheesy smile which was greeted by a stunned silence. Jerrie noticing the match still lit hastily blew it out. The two cats looked at each other, "Run!" Jerrie shouted, he grabbed Teazer by the paw and pulled her along with him out of the living room. Once in the hall they headed towards the door, but it was locked. Jerrie took a frantic look round, the humans having come to their senses ran after them into the hall. "Quick." He said pulling Rumpleteazer behind a large potted plant.
The two cats looked out from behind the leaves as the three humans got closer, "They must have gone dad." Said a young girl as she peered through a window, their dad shook his head,
"No they can't have." He opened the door to look out.
"Quick this is our chance." Jerrie whispered, he pulled Rumpleteazer's paw again but she didn't move. Surprised Jerrie looked franticly at her; the door was beginning to close.
"I'm not going till I get what I came for." Rumpleteazer said quietly, she motioned towards the door with her head, "You go." But the tom merely shook his head and gazed at her.
Jerrie stared in shocked silence, what was this? A cat more dedicated to thievery than him! He had thought it impossible, but this pretty and headstrong queen had just proved him wrong. The door shut with a loud bang. Jerrie looked at the queen who nodded. Silently the made their way up the staircase at the end of the hall.
Jerrie kept himself low, silently reaching the top. But there waiting for them, were too house cats pressed up against the wall, Rumpleteazer jumped in surprise. The burglars walked forward as did the two house cats; a queen and a tom. The four cats stared at each other, no one moved, suddenly Jerrie pounced at exactly the same time as the other tom, and they smacked heads with a loud thud. Jerrie rubbed his head in agony; Teazer on the other hand was rolling about on the floor laughing. "Shut it!" Jerrie howled at Teazer, "And you." He added to the other queen. Teazer struggled to her feet, holding back giggles,
"But... there's only one of us laughing," She smirked at the confused look on the toms face, "It's a mirror!" With that she convulsed in laughter again. Jerrie ignored her; he put up his paws and felt the cold glass, then surveyed his reflection.
"My, my you are a handsome tom." He told his reflection.
"Well I could have told you that." Said Teazer recovering from her laughing fit. Jerrie looked at her out of the corner of his eye, maybe she wasn't such a pain in the bum after all. "Come on then." Said the queen, "Did we come her to steal or what?"
Rumpleteazer was in the first bedroom, regarding a delicious set of ruby earrings. Jerrie had jumped onto a dresser and was taking his pick of gold watches to stuff in his satchel. "I can't believe that in all your time as a cat burglar you've never seen a mirror!" Teazer laughed as she admired her reflection, holding the earrings to her ears. Jerrie rolled his eyes,
"I have seen a mirror, just never one so big that's all. Anyway you're one to talk you jumped out of your skin when you saw those two cats."
"You mean... us?"
"Yeah, us."
Teazer placed the earrings in her satchel and closed the now empty jewellery box. She rattled her bag.
"I don't think I can carry much more." She sighed. Jerrie looked over, his bag only half full. "Oh and I so want that pearl necklace." She moaned running the white stones through her hand lovingly.
"Give them here then." Jerrie took the pearls and stuffed them in his bag.
"Careful!" Screeched Rumpleteazer. Jerrie scowled,
"I won't carry them at all if you're not careful." He said playfully. "My bags full too now."
Rumpleteazer took a last swift glance around the room, just checking if there was anything else she desperately wanted.
"Come on then." She said and they left the room.
On their way down the two cats paused at the mirror and looked at their reflections, "We look quite similar really." Jerrie pointed out.
"We're both calico if that's what you mean." Rumpleteazer looked Jerrie up and down. "But your way darker than me, and your tails not as neat as mine, yours is kind of straggly where as mine is smooth and neat. My whiskers are straighter too." She would have gone if Jerrie had not put on an affronted face.
"Make me feel good about myself why don't you."
Back at the door the two cats were unable to go any further. "Well what do you usually do to get out?" Jerrie asked the queen as he eyed up the solid door,
"I usually go out the way I came in." Rumpleteazer said exasperated.
"Oh yeah and that's real helpful." Jerrie slouched against the door.
Rumpleteazer bit her lip,
"Well there must be another door, or an open window or something."
The tom closed his eyes and put on his 'thinking' face, "The window in the living room was open." He finally said.
Rumpleteazer shook her head, "Aren't that lot in there?" She pointed her thumb to the living room.
"Life's full of risks." Jerrie got up.
"The question is, are you stupid enough to take them?" Rumpleteazer grabbed his arm as he walked towards the room.
"I live on the edge." The tom said in what he hoped was a suave way.
"I'm surprised someone hasn't pushed you off." Muttered Teazer as she followed him.
The window was open just wide enough for the cats to jump out separately. The man of the house was asleep on a high backed arm chair; his daughters were engrossed in the TV.
"Ladies first." Jerrie said stepping back a little. Rumpleteazer smirked
"Is the big risk taker losing his nerve?" She chided. Jerrie scowled at her.
"Fine I'll go, but I hope you realise that if I end up dead it's your entire fault!"
"Rather you than me." The queen smiled.
Jerrie took a deep breath and ran for the window. He could hear the various trinkets in his satchel rattling loudly. With a great leap he landed on the sill as yet unnoticed. He looked around with a smug grin. But where was that queen? She had gone from the hiding place by the door. Jerrie looked around frantically. Finally he saw her creeping slowly near.
"Run!" He mouthed. "Run!" Rumpleteazer shook her head, convinced that her way was best. She saw the tom getting agitated on the window sill.
"The cats!" Came a screech. And Rumpleteazer felt a strong arm around her waist. She scratched and bit to get free and was quickly dropped. "It bit me." The girl shouted, holding her bleeding hand.
Rumpleteazer ran as fast as she could with the heavy satchel thumping on her back. She got to the sill and watched the tom jump through the window, she quickly followed him. Not a moment too soon, with a dull thud the window was shut. Rumpleteazer collapsed on the grass, "They were aiming for my tail." She whimpered and cradled her prided tail.
"That was a close one!" Jerrie sighed recovering his breath,
"Well, life is full of risks." Rumpleteazer said savagely as she got up.
The tom stuck out his paw,
"MungoJerrie."
"Rumpleteazer." She shook his paw. There was an awkward silence.
"Well..." Said Jerrie.
"Well..." Repeated Rumpleteazer.
"I guess I'd better get going."
"Yeah me too."
Jerrie looked at his paws,
"Erm... Rumpleteazer." He looked up but the queen was gone. Jerrie looked around but he couldn't see her anywhere. So he made his slow way back to the junkyard.
Tugger was lying behind the ford. Finally some peace, it wasn't that he didn't appreciate his Tugger fan club, but every now and then he just needed some 'Tugger time.' He rolled over and opened one green eye. Tugger got up; he'd spotted Mungojerrie walking down the street with a full satchel on his back.
Jerrie slinked through the bars of the gate. "Hay Jez." Jerrie looked up Tugger was smiling down on him.
"Hi Tugs." Jerrie replied smiling.
"Listen," The tom jumped down to him, "Do you think maybe next time you go out you could do me a favour?" Jerrie rolled his eyes.
"What are you after?"
The tom looked around cautiously, "I need a present for Bomb."
Mungojerrie widened his eyes.
"Isn't it usually the other way round? You're slipping Tugs."
Tugger bit his lip.
"Do you think? Okay forget it."
Jerrie wasn't in the mood for a debate so he just nodded and walked on.
Jellylorum and Jennyanydots were lying on the tyre when Jerrie walked past. His head was bowed and he appeared to be thinking. "I don't think," Remarked Jelly, "That I have ever seen that cat so deep in thought."
"I don't think," Smirked Jenny, "That that cat has ever been so deep in thought."
Jerrie looked up at the sound of giggling. Jenny and Jelly stopped laughing and smiled down at him. Jerrie smiled back, "Jenny could you send Skimble to my den as soon as possible? I've got that watch he wanted."
Jenny smiled kindly at him,
"Will do Jerrie." She turned to Jellylorum, "You know it will help him so much in keeping time when he's on the watch."
Jelly nodded.
In the safety of his den Jerrie let out a huge sigh. He was acting really out of character; it hurt his brain even more to think that a queen had spurned this unusual amount of thinking. He shook his head time to think of something else. With giddy anticipation he opened the satchel, in a flash of silver and gold his new processions tumbled out. It didn't matter how long it was since Jerry took them, he always got excited when he could look at them again in more detail. He had a selection of three watches for Skimble to choose from; the other two would come in handy. Some women's jewellery too, Jerrie put it aside in case Tugger changed his mind about a present for Bombalurina. He probably would. There were a few small trinkets near the bottom of the pile, as Jerrie was examining them a glimmer of white caught his eye. He tugged at the single pearl and pulled it out of the pile the rest of the necklace quickly followed. Jerrie let the pearls slide through his paws, this was what Rumpleteazer wanted, but he'd completely forgotten to give them back to her. He contemplated the irony of it, he'd spent ages trying to figure out an excuse to go and find her, and then out of the blue one appears on his door step.
Jerrie looked out of his den; it was getting dark maybe he should wait until morning. He paced backwards and forwards in the cabinet. Should he or shouldn't he?
"Hay lad, Jenny said you had a watch for me."
Jerrie jumped five foot into the air; he turned to see the cheerful face of Skimble peering into his den. "Are you alright laddy?" Skimble let him self in.
Jerrie smiled,
"Yup, come and see the watches." He presented the three watches to Skimble who surveyed them all carefully. Finally he chose a bronze one with a large face.
"Thank you laddy, this will come in very handy." He smiled and left the den.
Jerrie tutted, it was even darker now, trust him to put it off. He looked at the face of a gold watch and squinted. Carelessly he flicked it away with his paw, what's the point in that he couldn't even tell the time! Sighing Jerrie curled himself up in the corner of his cabinet, the steady ticking of the watches sending him to sleep.
When Jerrie woke up the next morning the rain was coming down at a steady drizzle. He yawned and wondered what he could do today. Then he caught sight of the pearls by his side. That's what he could do.
Trust me, thought Jerrie as he shielded his eyes against the beating rain. He couldn't have done this last night, when it was dark and mild. No he had to do it this morning, with the rain hammering down and the wind howling in his ears. Stupid, stupid tom. Pain in his eye forced him to drop the pearls he was clutching in his paw and the hail began to beat down on him. As Jerrie fished for the pearls in a suspiciously dark puddle he realised how stupid he really was, he didn't even know where to find this queen, but here he was allowing himself to get soaked to the bone all for her and her stupid pearls. He pulled the necklace out of the puddle they seemed to have significantly dulled in colour. So he went and washed them in a cleaner puddle.
Jerrie arrived at the white house he'd been in yesterday. He saw to his surprise a light calico cat sat on the porch sheltering from the rain. It was Rumpleteazer. She seemed to be looking for someone, Jerrie walked towards her. "Jerrie!" The queen squealed and ran to meet him. Jerrie smiled at her,
"What are you doing here?" He asked her.
"Oh, I was just passing and decided to shelter from the rain."
"The criminal always returns to the scene of the crime." Jerrie said knowingly. Rumpleteazer rolled her eyes.
"And you?"
Jerrie took the necklace from behind his back,
"Returning these."
Rumpleteazer shrieked in delight. And took the pearls from Jerrie she held them to her cheek lovingly.
"Fasten them for me please." She handed him the pearls and turned round. Jerrie fastened them around her neck; surprisingly they were the perfect fit.
"Must have shrunk in the puddle." He muttered.
Rumpleteazer gave him a confused look, Jerrie shrugged, "Look the rains stopping." He said quickly. Rumpleteazer smiled.
"Great, I guess I don't have to sit under that porch anymore."
Jerrie nodded, "Looks that way, so where were you headed?"
"Oh, no where in particular."
Jerrie sighed he shuffled about a bit, running his claws against the wet grass beneath his feet.
"Um, I guess I'd better carry on then, to you know... wherever I was going."
Jerrie nodded slowly and began to walk away.
What are you doing Jerrie? He shouted at himself mentally. That queen's about to go again and this time they'll be no excuse to go and find her. "Er, Rumpleteazer." He said turning around. Rumpleteazer stopped walking.
"Yes?" She said eagerly.
Jerrie smiled, "Where about do you live?" He walked up to her.
The queen sighed, "Oh no where in particular wherever my paws take me, though I think I may have found a permanent home. But I'm not too sure about it."
Jerrie got interested, "What do you mean?" He asked. Rumpleteazer bit her lip,
"It's a bit strange really. About a week ago, this fella came up to me and offered me a... job." Jerrie nodded indicating for her to go on, this story seemed familiar.
"Not just a job either," The queen continued, "But a job complete with a place to stay."
Jerrie felt his heartbeat quicken, yes this story was very familiar.
"This fella, what was his name?"
"Macavity."
Jerrie nodded it was just as he thought,
"I wouldn't take this job if I were you; trust me it's something you'd regret."
The queen looked up with interest, "How do you know?"
"Talking from experience." Jerrie sighed and gave a slight shudder, "Put one paw wrong and... that's it!" He drew his claw across his neck in a sinister way.
Rumpleteazer smirked. "I'm serious!" Jerrie said grabbing her arm, something in the tone of his voice convinced Rumpleteazer that he was. The queen sat down on the wet pavement. Truthfully she had thought that fella was a bit of a creep, but the temptation of a comfortable home had over-ridden all her instincts.
"Well," She sighed, "Your warnings come to late, I've agreed."
Jerrie gaped. "You haven't!"
"I have!"
Jerrie shook his head in amazement that was suicide pure and simple. No cat that entered Macavity's pad came out unscathed. He self consciously put his paw to his neck and felt the long jagged scar that his fur had grown over. He shivered it was a reminder of Macavity's utter disregard for the pain of others. He wasn't a normal cat, he didn't care what he had to do, who he had to hurt to get his way. Jerrie heard Rumpleteazer whimper stirring him from his thoughts. "Are you saying that if I do anything wrong, he'll just kill me. Just like that?"
Jerrie nodded solemnly. Rumpleteazer stared at her paws, "Then I'll quit!" She said suddenly, "I just won't turn up."
Jerrie shook his head, "You don't get it, you can't 'quit' Macavity's place. It's service for life, no exceptions." He watched Rumpleteazer's face fall.
"You're not there now though." She said quietly. Jerrie traced the scar on his neck with his paw again.
"That's different." He murmured, Rumpleteazer decided not to question him any further.
"Then what am I going to do?" she moaned Jerrie shrugged and stared at the ground.
Rumpleteazer looked up with a mischievous glint in her eye. "You don't think-"
"No!" Jerrie cut her off. But he was smiling slightly.
"Aw come on Jerrie!"
The tom shook his head. Teazer sighed dramatically, "Then, I guess this is the end for poor Rumpleteazer. If I should die Jerrie I hope you realise that it will be entirely your fault." Jerrie smirked but continued to ignore her, Rumpleteazer gave up on the sympathy act. "Just think of yesterday Jerrie, we made a great team, imagine if we worked together all the time we'd become the most formidable cat burglars in all England!"
Jerrie looked up a spark in his eye. "We'd be famous because of our extensive reputation!" Rumpleteazer continued seeing the tom take interest. "What do you think?"
Jerrie opened his mouth eagerly ready to agree, but a sudden thought made him change his mind.
"I'd agree straight away Teazer, but it's not just my choice it's my tribe. I mean what will they say if I just waltz home with you in tow."
Teazer smiled, "Well Jerrie, life's full of risks." The tom winked at her,
"You're catching on!" He said, "C'mon then follow me, and this better be a risk worth taking."
Bombalurina was lying on the old ford, trying to dry her fur in the weak sun. She spotted Mungojerrie coming round the corner but didn't think much of it, until she noticed the queen walking by his side. "Cassandra, come up here!" Bombalurina shouted to the black queen who was just passing. "Is my eye sight failing or has Jerrie brought a queen back with him?" Cassandra jumped beside Bombalurina on the car. She squinted through hazel eyes at the approaching cats.
"He's defiantly brought someone with him."
At that statement Jellylorum decided to join the party,
"Well, first Munk now Jerrie, who's going to bring someone home next I wonder?"
Cassandra sniffed, "If he expects her to stay, she'd better be a Jellicle."
"Fundamentally all cats are Jellicles; we just split into separate tribes." Bombalurina said, the other queens turned to her in surprise. "What? I can have beauty and brains you know."
Cassandra chose to ignore this comment, in her eyes that was an unfair advantage.
"Well," Jellylorum said, brightening, "Maybe this queen can grind some common sense into him."
The two cats got nearer and Bombalurina found she could hear their conversation. It seemed they were arguing about the correct way to 'case a joint.'
"No, I'm telling you if you stay near the front and just stare at the house they think your just another cute kitty, there's always a saucer of cream in it for you and you get to gather information at the same time." The queen was saying.
Bombalurina shook her head.
"Or not."
Mungojerrie led Rumpleteazer through the wrought iron gates. He gulped as he saw the three queens staring down at him. "Who's your friend Jerrie?" asked Bombalurina jumping down from the car.
"This is Rumpleteazer." Jerrie smiled indicating to the queen.
"You know Jerrie; you can't just bring your friends back willy-nilly." Jellylorum said dryly, staying on the ford where she towered above the other cats.
Jerrie shrugged, "Well Munkustrap did." He said impulsively.
"Yes, but that's Munkustrap." Cassandra sighed and walked away.
Rumpleteazer didn't look at any of them; she stared at her paws which had suddenly become very interesting.
"Look, Teazer won't be any trouble, she just needs a place to stay for a while." Jerrie pleaded.
Bombalurina sighed, "It's not up to us Jerrie, you'd better go and find Munkustrap."
Jerrie led Rumpleteazer to his den, "Will you just stay here?" He asked, "Make yourself at home while I go talk to Munk okay?"
Rumpleteazer nodded. "No problem."
Rumpleteazer went through the lopsided door into Jerrie's cabinet. It was big and airy. "Room for two in here." Rumpleteazer thought, then giggled at herself. She walked around tutting at the patches of dust on the floor, when something caught her eye. Another door at the back of the den. Well it looked like a door, Rumpleteazer went closer to investigate. She ran her paw over the solid oak and gave a little knock. The familiar sound of a hollow ring signalling a hidden area delighted her ears. She noticed a hole on the corner of the door, she stuck one of her claws into the hole and pulled. "Ow!" Rumpleteazer whimpered, she'd broken a nail. As she cradled her paw the door swung open. Rumpleteazer gasped, that Jerrie was such a horder! Inside the secret compartment year's worth of thievery greeted her excited eyes. She walked into the small room, everything had a place. There was a pile of jewellery, a pile of watches a pile of small ornaments and trinkets.
"I know I said make yourself at home but I didn't mean it so literally!"
Rumpleteazer spun round, Jerrie was in the doorway smirking.
"Sorry!" She squeaked, "I just got curious I guess."
Jerrie smiled,
"No problem, you're going to be staying here for a while anyway." He said leading Rumpleteazer out of the secret room.
"Really? You mean that Munkustrap said I could?" Jerrie nodded and closed the door behind her.
"But not a word about this to anyone."
Rumpleteazer did a zipping motion across her mouth.
Jerrie smiled, "Are you hungry? There's an open tin of tuna around here somewhere." He waved his arm around vaguely.
Teazer shook her head,
"No I'm not hungry but I am really tired, would you mind if I just went to sleep?" She yawned as if to back up her point.
Jerrie shook his head,
"Of course not!"
Rumpleteazer smiled gratefully, she walked to the pile of blankets in the corner of the den and collapsed happily onto them.
Rumpleteazer opened one bleary eye, ready for another day on the streets. She gasped when her eyes met the solid oak of the cabinet, then it all came flooding back to her. She sighed contentedly; MungoJerrie's arm was around her waist, Teazer giggled silently. With much effort she tried to get up without waking Jerrie.
Rumpleteazer breathed in the fresh morning air. The junkyard was still, covered in a layer of mist. She leant back against the cabinet taking everything in. Jellylorum walked past the den when she noticed Rumpleteazer she tutted disapprovingly and scowled at the queen. As soon as her back was turned Rumpleteazer erupted into giggles.
"What's all this racket?" Jerrie stepped out of the den yawning.
"Jellylorum disapproves of me sleeping in your den." Teazer giggled.
Jerrie raised his eyebrows and smiled. "That was a great night Teazer." He said loudly, putting his arm around her shoulders.
"Jerrie!" Rumpleteazer hissed smacking him on the stomach. Jelly stopped walking for a minute she looked like she was about to say something, then shook her head and walked away faster. Teazer laughed loudly, "You'll be the talk of the tribe at this rate!" She giggled. Jerrie winked,
"When aren't I?"
"I like potatoes."
"Teazer you're a cat! You can't have a choice between meat and spuds and choose spuds!"
"Well I do, aw c'mon Jerrie, I am your guest, and I should be able to eat whatever I like."
"You can carry them."
"Fine I will, but only if you carry the pork."
MungoJerrie and Rumpleteazer were sat on a window sill. They had come to Kensington square to do some 'shopping.' Jerrie had his eye on a huge piece of pork, presented on a silver plate in the centre of someone's dinner table. Rumpleteazer of the other hand was far more interested in the bowl full of potatoes.
"Okay," Jerrie said, "After three." He got into a position ready to jump onto the table, "One, two."
"Go!" Cried Rumpleteazer and she leapt of the sill straight onto the table. Teazer stuck her claws out, she felt herself skidding along the table out of control getting closer and closer to those potatoes. Rumpleteazer shut her eyes and held her breath. Jerrie, almost lazily stuck out his paw and grabbed her back leg anchoring her just before she collided with her beloved spuds.
"You see, this is why we do things on three." Jerrie rolled his eyes, "Amateurs."
Rumpleteazer chose to ignore him, just because she got a little excited and skidded on the table cloth. He'd never let her live it down. Rumpleteazer sighed. "How are you going to carry them?" Asked Mungo looking at the large bowl.
"In my satchel obviously." Rumpleteazer smirked, pulling her makeshift satchel off her shoulder, "Amateurs."
Back at the den Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer were digging into their ready made Sunday roast. Rumpleteazer looked longingly over at Jerrie who was devouring his pork with relish. "Jerrie can I have some of that pork please?" Rumpleteazer whined, trying to make her eyes as big as possible. Jerrie shook his head,
"I thought my pork was inferior to your precious spuds."
"Did I ever say that? Please, if you give me some pork then you can have a potato."
Jerrie smirked, "I don't want a measly potato."
"Jerrie!" Rumpleteazer said in surprise, "These aren't just your average potato; they are roast potatoes, roasted in the finest goose fat and topped with succulent herbs and spices."
Jerrie licked his lips, "Okay send one this way."
Rumpleteazer never really settled into tribe life, but then again neither had Jerrie. They would go out in the day and come back with hoards of stolen goods. The burglars were always scowled on disapprovingly; that was until someone actually needed something then it was a different matter. But with the Jellicle ball drawing closer the two cats went out less and less as the fear of being caught and missing the ball over-rode the need to steal.
MungoJerrie and Rumpleteazer were sat out on the tyre pile discussing excitedly the ball ahead. Teazer scratched her ear thoughtfully, "I think, Jerrie we should have our own song." Mungojerrie rolled over onto his back and smiled at the queen.
"Yeah Teaz, that's a great idea, we could make a real entrance singing, dancing the lot!"
Teazer squealed in excitement,
"We could tell the story of our crimes, broadcast our reputation."
Jerrie sat up quickly, his eyes dancing with excitement, then he had a thought and his face dropped. "What is it?" Teazer said grabbing his paws.
Jerrie sighed, "We have to ask Munkustrap." The queen scowled,
"Do we have to?"
"Yes."
Rumpleteazer stretched, what a shame she had all the choreography planned, but Munkustrap would never agree. Jerrie smiled sympathetically, "It's worth a try though I'll go ask him."
The tom jumped from the tyres and looked up at Teazer; she did a thumbs up sign. He looked around, no sign of Munkustrap. As Jerrie walked around the junkyard looking for the familiar silver and black tom he was thinking. For a while now he'd been having the same thoughts all about Rumpleteazer. He liked her a lot, she was so playful and quirky and the second best cat burglar around, (The first being himself of course.) He smiled to himself but they weren't the only reasons he liked her. There was something special about Rumpleteazer, it could be the way her eyes sparkled when she laughed, or how she giggled in anticipation when she was excited. Then again it could just be because she was Rumpleteazer, and that in itself was why she was special. Jerrie looked up he'd almost walked straight past Munkustrap. "Munk!" He shouted, the silver tom turned and his face fell a little.
"Jerrie."
Jerrie grinned, "Don't look too pleased to see me."
Munk smiled back, the sarcasm went whoosh over his head.
"Listen," Jerrie began he walked closer to Munk and took a cautious look around, he couldn't let too many people hear or it would ruin the surprise. "Teazer and me were wondering... could we have a song?" He looked up hopefully, using Teazer's trick of 'puppy dog' eyes. Munk looked confused,
"A song?"
"Yeah like Jenny and Skimble."
The tabby looked suddenly alarmed, "You and Teazer want a song?" Jerrie nodded just as Munk shook his head, "The schedule's a bit full this year so I don't think we have any room." Jerrie looked crestfallen, "Sorry." Munk said as an afterthought. He didn't look it. Munk sighed Jerrie looked so disappointed, "But if you want you two can be the first peke and pollicle in my play." Jerrie nodded and pretended to be pleased. He'd much rather has his own song than pretend to be a dog, understandably.
"Well?" Asked Rumple as Jerrie sat next to her,
"He said no." The tom was solemn. Teazer bit her lip,
"That's a shame, I'd already thought of the first lines." Jerrie sighed and collapsed on the tyre's,
"I don't want to hear it." He moaned, but Rumple wasn't listening.
"MungoJerrie and Rumpleteazer we're a notorious couple of cats.
As knock-about clowns, quick-change comedians-" She faltered and stopped, "I couldn't think of anything else after that." Jerrie got up humming the tune,
"Tight-rope walkers and acrobats." He sung. Teazer's face lit up,
"Perfect!" A smile spread across Jerrie's face,
"I think that maybe we could just manage this, if we pick a time where no one will suspect it and then blast out in the middle of everything." He leapt up in the air to accentuate his point. Teazer clapped her paws,
"Come on then let's finish this song."
"On argentine joint-" Jerrie scratched his head, "beef and pork. Nah. Chicken and ham?" Rumpleteazer groaned,
"No way!" Jerrie sighed dramatically,
"Well you think of the next line then. On argentine joint-"
"Potatoes and greens." Teazer sung. Jerrie tutted,
"What is it with you and spuds?"
Finally after a considerable amount of time the song was complete and the dancing rehearsed. Everything was ready for the Jellicle ball.
On the night of the ball the cat-burglars were having the time of their lives. Jerrie was enjoying dressing up as a cockroach even when he did stab himself with his fork. It was later that his mood started to plummet. Jenny had just finished her song and then Tugger emerged with a bang. Jerrie led Teazer off and they climbed out of their costumes. "Trust Tugger to make such an entrance." Jerrie laughed, he turned around and saw to his disappointment that Teazer wasn't there. Instead she decided to join the other stupid queens all swooning around Tugger. Jerrie felt his breath catch in his throat, that wasn't fair! Rumpleteazer looked around and giggled when she saw Jerrie's face, Bombalurina had been right, if you want them to notice you, make them jealous!
Jerrie sat moodily on a pipe, Teazer came and sat beside him, she couldn't be bothered waiting around while Etcetera screamed at Tugger. "Oh come to join me have you?" Jerrie grunted. Teazer tried not to laugh,
"What's wrong with me dancing with Tugger? It's not my fault he's irresistibly sexy!" Jerrie turned his back to her,
"I mean what's with that tied round his leg, is that a piece of his own skin?"
"It's not his skin!" Teazer said indignantly.
"If you ask me that's taking his fetish with himself too far." Jerrie turned back round, but Teazer was gone again, screaming for Tugger. Jerrie sighed and stared at the ground solemnly,
"What's up laddy?" Jerrie looked up; Skimbleshanks was smiling down on him. He shrugged and looked longingly at Rumpleteazer; Skimble gave him an understanding pat on the shoulder. "Teazer by name Teazer by nature." He sighed then realising he'd probably just said the completely wrong thing he hurried away again.
Jerrie watched uninterested as Grizabella wandered in, old news. "Who's that?" Rumple hissed in his ear, regarding the old grey queen with a mixture of curiosity and disgust. "That's Grizabella; she left a long while ago. Big mistake by the looks of it." Teazer nodded in agreement.
It was while Bustopher Jones was giving away his rose that the perfect opportunity came for Jerrie and Teazer. Suddenly the nearby clap of thunder was heard and Demeter squealed, "Macavity!" Jerrie looked around a wide grin spread across his face; he grabbed Teazer by the arm,
"C'mon this is our chance!" He whispered. Rumpleteazer shook her head with a look on her face that said 'are you mad?' Jerrie smiled soothingly, "I promise you he's not here."
Rumpleteazer still looked unsure but she followed Jerrie out of the clearing towards their den.
"Quick!" Jerrie threw her satchel and Teazer caught it.
"What do we need these for?" Teazer moaned, getting agitated.
"Props, to set an atmosphere." Jerrie said thinking it was obvious. Rumpleteazer shrugged and the two cats ran back to the clearing.
Rumpleteazer snuck out into the clearing no one could be seen she was slightly disappointed, she'd pictured a huge audience cheering them on but then again they were Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. Teazer gave Jerrie the signal to follow, the coast was clear. She couldn't help laughing at what they were doing but it didn't take Jerrie long to shush her.
The two cats began to sing the well planned lyrics and dance through the frequently rehearsed choreography (most of the credit to Rumpleteazer for the latter.) Then near the end it was time for the big finale, the double windmill. It was the only bit of the dance routine that Jerrie had made up, and Teazer had never been too sure about it. She took a deep breath and looked into Jerrie's reassuring eyes, the thought of it made her nervous but no way was she going to let him down.
Jerrie held out his paw, he thought for a minute Rumple wasn't going to take it. She had always been nervous about this stunt. But finally he felt the warmth of her paw in his and they were off!
Jerrie gripped Rumple's legs as the yard went past them in a blur. All he could think was that if Rumple let go he'd crash to the ground and vice-versa. It was a good thing he wasn't the vindictive sort. Then they'd gone as far as they could go, he could let go of Rumple now and he watched proudly at the look of triumph on her face.
"And there's nothing at all to be done about that!" The cats sung and Teazer felt herself being lifted onto Jerrie's hip. She smiled happily and felt the buzz of adrenalin through her body. It had been well worth it! Jerrie suddenly dropped her and Teazer noticed the circle of cats around them, she felt her mind spin, exactly how much trouble could you get into for disobeying Munkustrap? Teazer felt Jerrie's paw tug her away. They ran towards to the gate but the circle of cats blocked them off, Jerrie pulled her again up towards the old car and they jumped on the roof. Teazer turned around just in time to see her satchel fly through the air she jumped to catch it but missed.
"And there's nothing at all to be done about that!" The cats chorused, Teazer gasped in shock and turned to Jerrie who was pouting,
"They're using our own lines against us!" She faced the other cats angrily but suddenly everything went quiet, Deuteronomy was coming.
Teazer listened happily to Munk and Tugger singing about their leader, and then she and Jerrie jumped off the car to greet him. She was looking forward to the play but realised that in all the rehearsing of their song Jerrie and her hadn't practiced their barking, unlike the other cats.
The lack of preparation showed to. Teazer giggled as she came face to face with Jerrie in pollicle form but he didn't look less handsome, just sillier. She didn't know whether to advance or retreat and neither did Jerrie. But the barking was the biggest mess up; it was going alright at first until Jerrie barked on her part! So they tried again with Munk directing them it still wasn't working and Munk was looking pretty ticked off by the end of it. Rumpleteazer giggled when Munk slapped Jerrie on the head and rubbed against his legs but the movement caused her already too big mask to fall over her eyes. Blindly Teazer stumbled around hoping that she was at least going in the right direction. She jumped when she felt two hands on her arm and heard Jenny yelling at her. Teazer pulled up her mask and squinted through the eye holes, she stared at Jenny who was pointing her back to Munkustrap. Teazer turned around and headed towards him, she was feeling pretty guilty for ruining the play and squeezed between his legs but he knocked her over and Teazer felt herself rolling away.
The rumpus cat wasn't too good either. You'd have thought for a superhero he'd at least know where he was going, but no. Then stupid Tugger had come back in showing off when he wasn't meant to, Teazer looked round and caught Jerrie's eye,
"Fetish with himself." He mouthed to her, Teazer just giggled.
It wasn't long until Macavity did his usual thunder clap trick; Teazer wasn't so nervous this time because to her it seemed that if old Deuteronomy was there then nothing could go wrong. And his soothing voice tempted all the cats that had scattered back into the clearing for the Jellicle ball.
Jerrie was enjoying the dancing but all the while something was praying on his mind. It was getting close to the mating dance and he'd sworn to himself that when it happened he would ask Teazer to dance with him. But as he felt the time getting closer he began to lose his nerve, it wasn't until Jerrie saw the way Plato danced with Victoria that he reminded himself of how important this was. "Teazer." Jerrie said his voice slightly shaky. The queen turned to him with a smile. Jerrie stared at the ground it was only a few seconds but to Rumpleteazer it seemed like an eternity, she waited with hopeful anticipation for the tom to speak again. "Do you want to dance with me?" He said quickly never taking his eyes of the floor. Teazer couldn't believe her ears,
"But... this is the mating dance." Jerrie looked up rolling his eyes,
"Yeah, I know."
Rumpleteazer squealed with excitement, "You mean it?" She asked, for her the world had frozen and it was just her and Jerrie alone having the conversation she'd dreamed of for so long.
Jerrie nodded, getting impatient most of the other cats were dancing by now. "Do it properly then." Teazer said her eyes glowing with excitement. Jerrie was about to protest but he looked into those eyes and couldn't.
"Rumpleteazer," He began getting onto one knee with much difficulty. "Will you be my mate?" Teazer squealed and clapped her paws in delight. She put her paw in his solemnly,
"Yes Mungojerrie I will." Jerrie smiled brightly then yanked her over to the main huddle of cats.
Rumpleteazer smiled contentedly lying in Jerrie's arms; she heard a voice in her ear, "Using me to make him jealous worked then." Teazer turned in surprise and saw Tugger lying there with a funny expression on his face; she wondered whether it was annoyance or amusement. Either way it didn't matter, Teazer smiled gratefully and gave him a quick kiss.
The rest of the night was just one big high, which was of course until Macavity decided to make his presence felt. It was right after Skimble's song when he did his trademark crashes. Teazer looked around wildly searching for Jerrie, she saw him and skidded through Skimble's legs to her mate feeling his comforting arms around her. And before Jerrie and Teazer knew it he was there hypnotizing them all and kidnapping old Deuteronomy. Teazer came out of the spell at the same time as Jerrie. "Stay here I'm going to find old D with the others." He said and then hurried away. Rumpleteazer hid behind an old bicycle tyre listening to Demeter and Bombalurina sing about Macavity.
Jerrie came back and Teazer ran to him but before she had time to speak Macavity was there! Rumpleteazer hid behind Jerrie and watched in confusion as Deuteronomy was returned unscathed. Teazer ran to greet him, but that mad queen Demeter suddenly jumped in her way; she hissed what was she doing? Then the same stupid queen jumped on his back, Teazer gasped as she watched their gentle leader throw Demeter off his back and suddenly he wasn't the gentle leader anymore, he was that fiend Macavity! She stared in shock as the hidden paw tried to kidnap Demeter and was fought off by Munkustrap.
The protector and the impostor fought throw for throw, scratch for scratch Teazer was sure Munkustrap would win but he was tossed aside and landed unconscious at her feet, Teazer carefully licked his wounds. She looked up to see Jerrie scratching Macavity he didn't last long. But finally Macavity was driven away making an over dramatic exit.
Jerrie held Teazer close as Mister Mistoffelees attempted to rescue Deuteronomy from the clutches of Macavity and his hench cats. They both gasped in surprise when their leader appeared and cheered for Mistoffelees.
Not long after the ball was over and Grizabella had surprisingly been the lucky cat chosen to Journey to the heavy side layer. Jerrie and Teazer were lying in their den talking. "I think we need to do something to celebrate." Teazer said to her new mate smiling happily. Jerrie nodded knowing what she meant.
"I can think of a couple of things..." He pulled her closer. Teazer giggled,
"Yeah but something else," She thought for a second, "Like a major big heist."
Jerrie considered the idea, "Like a job where we know we're going to come back with a lot!" Teazer encouraged him.
"Apartments." Jerrie muttered. Teazer sat up excitedly, "Yeah, how about the ones round the corner, and we can go from flat to flat."
Jerrie pulled a face, "Nah Rumps you've got to think big. Like the apartments at Cornwall gardens, real slap-up ones."
Teazer bit her lip, "Cornwall garden is huge, and it's a bit risky." Jerrie smiled cheekily and pulled her back down onto the bed,
"Life's full of risks."