Chapter one

Present day

Malcolm ran a hard hand through his disheveled hair. It had been one hell of week and half, and he had had literally no sleep. In the first place he had been at the hospital as soon as visiting hours started, and only left well after the nurses came in to tell him visiting hours were up. He had actually taken to sleeping there. An awkward situation if there ever was one, his six foot four body trapped into a tiny, hard chair that could barely accommodate an anorexic bird. Not to mention the tension between the very person he was there for and himself.

Mina…beautiful Mina, his skin crawled when the thought of the state they'd brought her in. Broken bones, destroyed blood vessels, and two torn arteries, she'd almost bled to death. Not to mention the array of scars they found all over her smooth skin. Malcolm had felt downright sick to his stomach when the doctors had told him in no short order that she'd had at least two surgeries before, and that there was no doubt to their mind that she had been abused. The worst part was the accusatory looks he had gotten, as if he would ever have laid a hand on her. It had taken some time to explain that he had not seen her in years, and that they were not lovers, but merely old friends.

Nobody seemed to believe that story, and in honesty Malcolm could not blame them. He refused to leave her side except once in a while to shower, and or to pick up her young son. (Whom it seemed everyone just blankly assumed was his son) It seemed that the situation could not get any more complicated.

To make matters worse was the endless parade of detectives and law enforcement types that came in too; constantly harassing him about his relationship to Mina and the boy, it had taken a rather angry call on his part to his brother to end that line of questioning. Yaten had looked to take over the case which would have at least made things easier for both brothers, but it had been deemed that Yaten was simply too close to the case. Not that, that had stopped Yaten from conducting a bit of detective work on his own.

Mina had been going in and out of consciousness, between the multiple surgeries that she was being subjected to, to fix some of the damage. The first prognosis had been wrong, and he had been informed very early on by her surgeon, that she would need to remain in the hospital longer than the expected week they had told him originally. It was general consensus that Mina would always walk with a limp after. The attacker had broken her leg in three places, and part of the bone had almost been ground to dust, reconstructive bone surgeries had fixed most of the damage, but it was still touch and go. She would have pins in that leg for the rest of her life, and in the cold it would hurt. Her shoulder was healing rather nicely they told him, but the attack had done her rotator cuff some serious damage, and it remained to be seen wither she would need another surgery later on to repair it. Another major concern they had was the torn artery in her shoulder, they had done their best they said, but as with most tears, there was always a risk of internal bleeding, and when she was discharged she'd have to be constantly vigilant about it.

When he'd talked to her last they'd had only briefly discussed her coming home to the ranch, but she had been out of it then, and he was sure she'd not remember. Mostly Malcolm had sat silent vigil beside her bed, holding her undamaged hand in his, and watching her breathing to insure she was still alive. It was the worst sort of hell for the man; he had never felt as helpless in all his life as he did now. Part of him wanted to go trolling the streets looking for the man who had done this to her, and kill him. Malcolm had already seriously considered hiring private detectives to find the bastard, and had more than once placed a call to L. J, only to get her voice mail.

Yaten had warned him against such action, saying that it would be considered tampering with the case. That had sobered him quick; he did not want to do anything that might result in the bastard getting away with his crime. He had however hired his own body guards to guard her room twenty four seven, as well as her son. For the last little while Zack had been staying at Nathan's house, but that had ended. Nathan had headed down to Texas a few days ago for Darien and Serena's wedding. So now the little boy was sleeping on Malcolm's couch, when he wasn't at school or at the hospital with Malcolm.

Zack and he had spent a total of three days together since this nightmare had started, and if Malcolm was being honest he would admit it was because the sight of the sweet little boy broke his heart. To see Mina's son with another man, was like a constant blow to the gut. Partially it irked him that while he had never been able to get over her long enough to be with another woman, Mina had shrugged off the memory of him and had a child with another man. Mostly though it reminded him how much he had lost when he had let her go. The worst part was how similar the boy looked to him, a constant ache that his boy could have been his. In fact when he had first laid eyes on the boy he that thought that he was his! That combined with the birth certificate they had found in Mina's purse that stated he was the father had almost made him choke. His son…his son!

But alas that had been proven false, a happy state that had last all of a day was destroyed. Yaten had told him the certificate was a fake, and what was more the detectives had found that she had a valid marriage license in Albany. Mina had been married a mere three months after she had left the ranch, and had, had her son seven months later. Zachary Micah Miller had been born in Kentucky at a women's shelter. She had given the boy Malcolm's last name, but had not named the father on the birth certificate. But Malcolm was no idiot he did the math, the time didn't add up, Zack was not his son.

That was driven home when Yaten had presented him with photo graphs of the wedding, which showed the happy couple. Malcolm had nearly fainted when he'd seen the man she'd married, he was tall, almost as tall as himself, with piercing blue eyes that were much like his own, and platinum blond hair cut short. The man could have been his brother!

The worst part was the thinking; his thoughts were killing him. He had known Mina, or at least he thought he had, she was sweet and wonderful and so beautiful. He had taken her virginity, he closed his eyes on that thought it was so painful, he remembered vividly the bloody sheets her scream, and her delicate white hands running down his back, her sweet gentle voice assuring him it was okay, that it would stop hurting…. He flinched as he thought of it. She had had tears in her eyes as she told him not to stop, and he had realized a moment too late that he had been wrong about her, that he had been too rough. She had cradled his head between her hands and told him she loved him, that it was okay that he could keep going, that she would be okay… his skin crawled as he thought of it, he hated himself then, because he could not stop, he had wanted her so badly and she had been teasing him for too long…He had not realized how badly he had hurt her until after, when he had seen the sheets, when she had looked up at him with those soft beautiful puppy love eyes and he had wanted to jump of a bridge. He had lashed out at her in anger…in disgust…at himself.

He had though he had ruined her for life after that…but apparently not, because a mere month later she had gone to bed with another man. Part of him wondered if it had been this man she had been thinking off when they'd been together, when she'd so boldly told him she loved him…it made him hurt so badly. But knowing what he knew about Mina now it made sense to him, Mina must have known the man before she'd known him…loved him. Perhaps in the sorrow of her parent's death she had simply transferred her love to Malcolm, used him in a way, and then…then she'd gone back to her lover…

The grief of it was so raw that sometimes Malcolm wanted to collapse into his own sorrow. But he could not afford to forget that she needed him, and whatever else had happened between them Malcolm knew that he could not turn his back on her. The last month had been torture for him, a slow agonizing torture that had shown him that he would always care for her, no matter the cost to himself. And it had been costly to be sure, Malcolm had flown in the best surgeons, he had paid her rent for six months, and her meager car payments, not to mention the actually hospital bills. But none of it mattered to him; he needed for her to be safe, to be well…to live.

He growled roughly as he headed to the shower, it was 5:30 in the morning, soon he'd have to wake up Zack, take him to school, and then head down to the hospital to find out if he could move her out to his ranch sometime this month. It was going to be a long, long day.

0000

It is night….the night before…? She saw the monster outside the grocery story…flinty eyes boring into her…strong cold hands wrapping around her forearms like vise grips…he is pulling her toward his filthy truck…no…NO! She fought…yes she fought…she won this fight…she knows that…her arm goes through the window, it hurts, it bleeds but she gets away…yes she got away from him that night….she should have left forever she should have packed up and ran away…why didn't she?

And then he was there again…he'd cut her off slamming his massive truck into her tiny rental. At first she had though it was an accident, but then his boot had come through the window! She had screamed then, tried her best to get away, but he was stronger than her…so strong…how had she forgotten that? He's pulling her out of the car, throwing her full against the pavement…her back still aches… His fists and steel toed feet are coming down on her; in a rain of blows that has knocked the wind fully out of her. She couldn't even scream...she is so scared, all she can do is watch with wild eyed fear as he beats her to death…she knows she's going to die, nobody could survive such pain! Her leg…oh god her leg, he had smashed it with his fist and then…and then…something so hard…the pain had shot right through her leg and into her stomach, she must have screamed… she wasn't sure… no…it wasn't her voice…oh god Zack… ZACK!

Mina shot out of bed, a cold sweat covering her body, her wild eyes searching the room around her frantically, this wasn't her apartment…this wasn't anywhere she knew. The door was three paces behind her, there was a chair to the left of the bed, it wasn't heavy but looked to be made of metal, she could use that if she had too, around her the room was barren, except for the IV in her arm, she could remove that and wield the stand as a sort of cane if need be…she wasn't wearing anything…no wait she was wearing one of those thin blue hospital sheets… Mina assimilated all the information quickly in her head, as she had learned to do a long time ago, so that in a few minutes she knew where to escape through and what to use as a weapon…not that it had helped her much against him. She shuttered slightly. It all came back to her then, and she collapsed back in semi relief. She was in recovery no doubt…after the latest of god-knew-how-many surgeries. She hurt all over, in every part of her body in fact, even the juices of her eyeballs! She could barely move much less wield an IV stand…but she was alive and she was safe…

She repeated the word over in her mind, slowly cherishing both the sensation and the meaning of the word on her tongue…safe…she had not felt safe in so long, not since the day she had decided to surprise Malcolm in her one and only nice dress. Her life had changed so drastically in the space of those few precious hours. She had opened the door in her too tight, slightly transparent dress (that she'd had since she was fifteen, well before she had the curvaceous figure she possessed in her early twenties and even now.) not knowing what she was secretly asking of him. God she was so naïve then! Of course he had thought she was some sort of scarlet woman trying to seduce him…and then to find out she was a virgin, in a way she didn't blame him for thinking she had baited him, trying to force him into marrying her.

She had thought that night was the worst night of her life, Mina could almost scoff…what had happened between her and Malcolm was a walk in the park compared to what the Monster had done to her. All Malcolm had done was break her heart...H e had ruined her life…Four years…four years he had been trying to destroy her, to consume her like the poison he was. Four long years she'd had to be constantly vigilant, constantly alert…one slip up…once in FOUR DAMN YEARS! And he'd gotten her!

She should have been dead, she should have been easy prey…but like a knight in shining armor the last man she had ever expected to help her had arrived…Malcolm. Big hearted wonderful Malcolm, who had every reason to hate her, he had come to her rescue. And she could never as long as she live repay his kindness. He had protected her, he had held her hand when she was scared allowed her to weep on him, beyond that he had taken care of the finances, she would never have been able to afford herself. That at least she could repay, she kept a running tally in her mind as best she could of what he was spending…but it was difficult…most days she didn't even know where she was, much less what was going on around her. She knew she'd talked to detectives at least twice. They'd asked her about her first marriage a subject that had made her sick, literally; she had thrown up all over the nice officer's shoes for his troubles. They hadn't come back to speak to her since.

She remember Malcolm had pulled her hair out off her face after she had vomited, that he had cleaned her up, had laid her back in her bed and gotten her some ginger-ale, that he had brushed the stray tears from her eyes….that later when she was falling asleep her had swept his lips against her forehead, that he had delicately ran his thumb against her lips…that he'd…he'd kissed her so softly…like a butterfly's wings…No that didn't happen she reassured herself, how foolish of her! Her imagination was getting away with her, why would Malcolm steal kisses from her? Why would he steal kisses from anybody? The man was pure masculine sex in human form; he could have any woman he wanted without even trying! And age had only refined him; he was even more beautiful that she remembered. There was something about the slight crows' feet around his eyes that made him seem debonair and sensuous…

He wore his hair longer then he used to, but not shaggy, it grazed his face just right adding an edginess to his hard masculine face. His full seductive mouth was just as perfect as she remember, albeit surrounded by a goatee. This was new too; Malcolm very rarely had facial hair when they'd know each other…the occasional bit of stubble yes. It made him all the more sexy to her, she wanted to shave the damn this off him! Because the mere sight of it made her want to throw herself at him constantly, and she was so doped up most of the time she was afraid she just might do it.

Even at the office, (though she had tried to avoid him like the plague for her own sake) he never had facial hair…come to think of it, she remembered his hair being shorter then too…clipped and neat…very businesslike. Actually that had been a side she had previously never seen on him either…three piece Armani suits, and fancy Italian leather shoes…the Malcolm Mina knew, wore blue jeans, Stetsons, dusty boots and a tee-shirt (on occasion just the other three). Although his clothes fit him too well to be cheap department store clothes, she had never before seen him in a suit…the sight of it had almost knocked the wind out of her… who was she kidding the man could have worn a burlap sack and a pair of ladies high heels and she'd still think he was perfect looking.

Mina shook her head hard; she was going down dangerous roads thinking about Malcolm in that way. Right now he was just an old friend helping her out, and it was best for her to remember, this constant thought about him being sexy as sin was just adding fuel to a fire she had to keep low for her own good. Beside this was all lulling her into a false sense of security, as safe as she was right now in the hospital at some point she would have to leave, and then she'd best have her wits about her. That sobered her in a hurry; she had to run as soon as she could…but that in itself was the problem. She was a single mother with no family, who was very seriously injured, she had nowhere to go. And worse yet no way of getting anywhere even if she did, in a week or two the hospital would probably discharge her, and then she'd be right back in danger. She didn't expect Malcolm to help her past her stay at the hospital, he had his own life to go back to, and she was after all a grown woman. He'd probably expect her to move back into her apartment, and go back to work at the office, thinking that surely the police would take care of her once she left his care. He might even be so kind as to let her keep his body guards for a few weeks after she was discharged, but she doubted that.

Clearly he realized he was in danger too otherwise he would not have hired the guard to protect him in the first place. No all in all she was on her own once she was discharged she was sure. Even as she thought this though, some blurred memory pulled at the corner of her mind, a thought that she was going home…?

0000

Yaten ran the plates through the data bank again in frustration. He hadn't had a decent break since the attack, he was exhausted and angry beyond anything he had experiences in recent months. But then he was used to that, he worked a lot of cases that suddenly turned cold. But this was much more personal to him. Mina was like a sister to him, his best friend in college, she had changed his life; it was she who had pushed him into switching majors from business to criminal justice. She whom he had thought about constantly for five years, even going so far as to try to track her down more than once, but had never been able to make himself invade her privacy like that. He had waited patiently hoping that eventually she would look him up, or send him a letter, call him. But he had waited in vain for years, and then she swept back into his life like a thunderstorm. He had heard that she was working with Malcolm, hoped that they would at least talk; that she would pluck the courage to confront Malcolm…but that too had been in vain.

Now all he felt was deep seated guilt, he should have tracked her down, he should have tried to contact her, checked in on her, and he should have been there to protect her, to save her from the mad man who had hurt her so badly that she was still in hospital a month later. He knew in his heart that he had felt torn between her and Malcolm that he hadn't wanted to complicate matters more between them by staying in touch with her. He knew what Malcolm had thought was going on between them, knew that Malcolm would never truly forgive him the part he'd played in his heartbreak…But none of that helped, he had failed Mina, he had in a way allowed this terrible thing to happen to her, by not being the detective he was, by not tracking her down when he'd had the chance…well no more Yaten was through being passive, through being sensitive to her privacy. He was going to find out who did this to her, and he was going to put him behind bars, if it was the last thing he did.

All of that was fine and dandy, but he still had to do his real job, which was right now being a babysitter to a witness who was finally ready to talk about a rather seedy businessman that had been dirty for years. Some stupid bit of corporate intrigue that placed the witness in a great deal of trouble, right now Yaten was cooperating in part with a task force that involved the FBI and the corporate crimes sector of the NYPD, LAPD,BPD and Houston PD. It was frustrating to Yaten because he had been transferred to corporate crimes division, from his own SVU, precisely because the head of his department didn't want Yaten involved in Mina's case. Yaten couldn't possibly have cared less for the corporate division, it stank of high class bullshit that he had left behind in his early twenties. Yaten had long let go of the business world, leaving it to his brother, for him all he wanted to do was protect the innocent and bring sickoes to justice. It was just his misfortune that he had a minor in corporate justice.

Right now he had a mere 20 minutes before he had to sit down with his liaison in the FBI, SSA Seiya K. Hart. Seiya was a pain the ass if ever there was one, a former air force pilot; the jackass was constantly trying to treat the team like a bunch of flyboys out on the town. It was infuriating to Yaten who wanted to smack the pretty-boy routine right off his smug little face. He was a know it all SOB who set Yaten on edge constantly. The worst part of it was that the asshole did actually know what he was talking about; he had two masters' degrees and a doctorate, and was currently writing his thesis on some economic bull crap that would theoretically stop inflation. What the genius was doing in the FBI was anybody's guess. He was profiler apparently, but was currently 'slumming it' as head of the task force.

The license plate numbers he was running was a composite of what four different witnesses to Mina's attack had claimed were the numbers of the truck. He had tried every combination he could think off with the 6 bloody numbers, and nothing had come up yet. He'd know it was a long shot but he'd been willing to try. He had skipped lunch to do it, and was starting to regret it as his time ran out, his stomach rumbled angrily, as he headed off to see the jackass about the witness. Some woman named Molly Frederica.

0000

He walked by her room casually, drinking in the sensation of control it brought him. He was winning, he always won, she was his! He absently fiddled with the too-tight scrubs he had stolen from the nurses' station earlier, trying in vain to create a bit more room for his broad shoulders. He was big, he knew that…not big like a football player, but tall and broad, he was thin though with a pinched look that most assumed meant he was weak. That was their first mistake, he was not weak!

They thought he was stupid too, just like she did. Thought that they could pull one over on him, they thought he was gullible. She thought she could just leave him? She thought he would just let her go? Never! Mina was his! He ran a hand over his collar bone rubbing the locket beneath his scrubs. It was a heart locked, inside was her picture, and a lock of her hair that he'd gotten from her the night she'd tried to run from him again. He smiled despite himself, she thought a wig and some contacts were going to fool him? He knew her in his soul, at the very pit of his being he knew her.

He walked by again, careful so as not to attract attention from the three burly men outside her room. Body guards, that were not her doing, she did not really want to be away from him, no she loved him, she always had. This was that man's doing, he had corrupted her, made her leave him, made her run. It was his fault! Malcolm Miller, millionaire playboy! He had taken his Mina, taken her away corrupted her mind, that had to be it. The only explanation, why else would she have left him? It was Miller!

And he would pay for it! Nobody took what was his and got away with it! Mina had to be punished too, she had to learn that she could not keep running away from him, that she could not leave him and still keep his devotion forever, no sacrifices had to be made, surely she knew that. He took care of her, and she served him that was all there was to it…that was how it was supposed to be…soon, soon, soon, soon that's how it would be again.

0000

"G'morning kiddo." Malcolm called out to the little mass asleep on his couch. "Time to get up, you have to go to school."

"Umm…five more minutes, I'm so sleepy." The boy mumbled back, pulling a face.

"Come on kid that's what you said five minutes ago, it's up time! Come on, we got to go." He said more forcefully this time.

"I want to see mommy," He replied after a minute. "I don't want to go to school, I wanna see my mommy!"

"You have to go to school," Malcolm said sternly, "I'll take you to go see her after."

"You promise?" He shot off suspiciously.

"Yes, I promise," Malcolm agreed with a wry smile.

"Right after school?" Zack probed.

"The minute you walk out those doors," Malcolm agreed. "But only if you get out of bed and ready for school."

"Okay, if you promise." Zack conceded, getting up and off the couch in one quick childishly graceful movement. "Can I wear runners?" He called back as he headed for the bathroom.

"Not on your life kid, if I get one more note from your teacher about you breaking uniform, your mom will have my head." Malcolm informed the boy.

"But those black shoes hurt my feet." Zack complained, through the bathroom door. "And mommy lets me wear runners to school sometimes."

"They do? Are they tight?" Malcolm asked, ignoring the last part.

"Uh-huh, thwey pinph mhy twoes." Zack said around a mouth full of toothpaste.

"Umm, you might have out grown those; we'll stop by a store on the way to school and buy you a new pair okay?" Malcolm responded.

"But shoes are expensive!" The little boy said, poking his head through the door, a dribble of frothy tooth paste at the corner of his mouth.

"Finish brushing your teeth," Malcolm said firmly. "Make sure you floss too."

"But they are expensive, mommy said next year I could have new ones, we couldn't afford them this year." He explained insistently. Malcolm's heart lurched, he had not realized how bad off they really were. The boy's sad little expression reminded him vividly of growing up with his own mother, having no money, wearing clothes until they literally would not go over his head anymore or the stitches were so worn the clothes would actually fall off. Wearing shoes until they pinched so bad they drew blood, or else until the soles had worn so thin he might as well have been walking bare foot. His mother had done everything she could to support them, but it was hard she had no education to speak off, and the only way she could make money was to strip, and that just barely paid the rent and for food, so extras like clothes and shoes were not really a priority.

Malcolm walked over to Zack, and kneeled down to him, careful not to touch him. (Zack did not like being touched) He looked the boy in the eye and in his steadiest most calming voice, he said;

"Listen don't worry about the money, I'll take care of it okay."

"But…" Zack began desperately.

"We can call it a birthday present if you'd like." He offered remembering what it was like to feel like the subject of charity.

"But my birthday isn't till March!" he exclaimed.

"Christmas then," Malcolm corrected with a smile. "It's only a few months away."

"…I…I…thank you." He said finally, looking down at his bare feet.

"No problem, I mean if you don't mind getting a lame present like shoes for Christmas." Malcolm smiled down at the boy, who looked up at him slowly, with a small smile on his own face.

"It isn't lame; mommy got me my runners for my birthday." Zack shot back.

"Well that's different runners are cool," Malcolm replied matter-of-factly. "Heck I wish someone would get me cool runners like yours."

"I'll ask mommy where she got them for you, but they might not make them in your size." Zack said excitedly looking down at the big man's feet.

"Probably not," Malcolm agreed. "Go on now kid, you better finish getting ready or we'll never get out of here."

"Okay...you're still going to take me to see mommy right?" Zack asked as he turned to return to the bathroom.

"Of course kid, I'll be there at 3 sharp I promise." Malcolm told him ushering the boy into the bathroom. "Now hurry it up or your teacher will write me another stupid note."

Malcolm was actually at Zack's school a whole 20 minutes early. He headed up to the admin office, to sign Zack out. Zack went to private school, a very ritzy private school that required the parents or guardians of the kid to sign their kids in when they dropped them off, and sign them out when they picked them up. It had struck Malcolm as odd that Mina would put her son into one of the most expensive schools in the country, when she could barely afford new shoes for the boy. But then maybe like so many other parents that scrimped and saved to put their children into private schools, she just wanted the best possible start for her son.

It made sense he supposed, Zack was a very bright boy, 'gifted' as more than one teacher had told him. He liked to read, and was already at a 2nd grade level, his teachers were sure that in a very short time, he would be completely beyond his own age group. But for right now, he simply had a special aid teacher that sat in with him three times a week to make sure he wasn't bored. There was even talk about skipping him ahead. But all those decisions were going to have to wait.

He'd been surprised by the level of education that was being pumped into the mind of a kindergartener, when he was in school he remembered coloring and napping. But not at this school, kids here were learning other languages and cultures, even learning how to play exotic new instruments. So for Zack to be considered gifted here…well he'd be bored out of his mind in regular school, Malcolm was sure.

He signed out the boy, and waited patiently for the bell to chime. His mind was a swirling mass of thought. Malcolm had already looked at enrolling the boy in a private school just outside of Red brook, in the city Paris. Actually it was his alma mater. Malcolm had spent 6 years in that school, and he met one of his closest friends there. It would be good for the boy, he was sure. It had been good for him when he was a boy, and he had certainly not been as gifted as Zack. But it was exceptionally expensive, not that Malcolm minded the cost, but he had a feeling that Mina might not like it. The fact was he knew that as soon as she was in a better position, more lucid, she would definitely be uncomfortable with the situation.

The truth of the matter was she had no choice, it was either accept his help or go to a shelter, and Malcolm and Yaten would never let her do that. It didn't help his case that he had once accused of her of being a gold digger; he was sure she hadn't forgotten that. No, once she was ready to be discharged, Malcolm was sure he'd be dealing with an uphill fight trying to take care of her. He knew that the only reason she was accepting his help right now was that she had literally no say in the matter, she was drugged up and exhausted from all the surgeries, she couldn't have put up a fight even if she had wanted to. But it was only a matter of time before she was stable again, and then she would probably do everything in her power to get away from him, to go back to avoiding him, to treating him like something disgusting she had found on the bottom of her shoe. It hurt him deeply to think about it.

Though he supposed he should have been used to it, after all while she had been at the office it had been as if they had never met, she had done all that she could to put distance between then. He remembered the first and last time she had called him to book an appointment, the severity of her voice, the formality; it had ripped him to shreds. After that she had never called to book again. She had gone so far as to contacting Nathan to book appointments between Malcolm and Darien. It would have been hilarious if it wasn't so heart breaking.

He sighed darkly, hating the way things where between them. But then things between them had never been smooth. When Yaten had first brought her home he had resented her presence. Malcolm had felt sorry for her loss, but had been annoyed that his brother had brought her to their home to shack up with her. He had thought so poorly of her, even though he had hardly known her, or anything about her. All he had seen was a leggy blonde, hanging off his brother. She was so beautiful, lovely even in her sorrowful visage. But he hadn't really looked at her then; he had felt too much contempt for her.

Then he'd seen her at his piano, sliding her hands over the keys, singing in her pure rich mezzo soprano voice. Malcolm had been filled with so much emotion at the image she made, of her delicate hands playing the piano that he had never let another soul touch. He had made a split second decision, he had no idea why he'd done it then, at the time all he knew was that he had to be close to her. And now here he was, because of that decision. 5 years later and he was still captivated by her, still pulsating with the need to be close to her. He wondered if it would ever end, if there would ever come a time when he wouldn't think about her, when he wouldn't ache for her…

"Malcolm, you came on time!" The delighted voice of Zack startled him out of his reverie; he smiled down at the boy.

"I told you I would," He replied easily. "Come on lets go." He said leading the boy out to of the school and toward the parking lot.

"We're going straight to the hospital right?" Zack asked once they were sitting in the car.

"Yes, unless you'd like to go home and freshen up first?" Malcolm offered.

"No! I want to see mommy!" Zack responded immediately.

"Alright kiddo, but that means hospital food for dinner again." He pointed out. Malcolm could see the Zack's disgust in his rearview mirror but the boy didn't complain. "We could stop off and pick up something, maybe get something for your mom, I'm sure she hates the hospital food too."

"Well," the boy said contemplating, "mommy really likes tacos," he said.

"They don't have those at the hospital." Malcolm pointed out.

"Okay," The boy conceded. "But right after we pick it up, we have to go see mommy." He said firmly.

"We'll go through the drive through," Malcolm agreed. He was just as anxious to get to the hospital as Zack was, but he felt guilty for feeding the boy nothing but cold sandwiches and disgusting hospital food for the last couple of days. Not that fast food was any better, he thought, but at least it was warm.

0000

Yaten lay back in the uncomfortable chair in his office, feeling his years. Today had been the day from hell, and he had nobody to blame for it but himself. He had been so focused on Mina that he hadn't taken the time to read the briefing SSA Hart had sent over to him. As a result he had spent the whole meeting trying to play catch up. It was just his luck that a few days before that, he'd agreed to heading up the investigation pertaining to Ms. Frederica, which meant that he, would basically be coddling some spoiled rich heiress, which was exactly what he was supposed to be doing this evening.

Seiya had so kindly added to that by suggesting that he; how did the bastard put it? "Wine and Dine her into spilling the whole thing." Yaten had almost punched the son of a bitch, but he'd managed to restrain himself, just barely, thinking of how it would look if he decked an FBI agent. When he had finally gotten back to his desk and read the briefing he had wanted to strangle Hart. As it turned out their key witness, one Ms. Frederica was completely unwilling to testify. In fact all the information that they had was pure speculation, covered thinly with a bit of weak witness testimony that would never hold up in court. The report even went so far as to say, that Ms. Molly Frederica had gone into hiding 5 years ago, and nobody had seen her since, though they did have an address in Boston for an apartment that they thought might be where she lived.

He could have screamed, what should have been no more than a few hours work had turned into something that was liable to take him months. Months! He didn't have months to waste on this insignificant piece of garbage case! Not when there were real victims that needed his help. Instead he was stuck in this quagmire of corporate ethics, thinking of a way to coax an unwilling witness into coming out.

Yaten sighed, reaching forward and turning on his computer. He had to figure something out, the task force had assigned him two other members to be under him, and if he didn't come up with something he was going to look like an idiot. His two underlings were smart capable people, so at least Seiya hadn't screwed him on that front. He'd given him a Houston detective named Taiki Ryan, and a cybercrime specialist based out of the FBI named Elizabeth Hansforth. Lizzie was a genius who seemed to know the answers to everything, he sighed darkly that was probably because she had read the brief. He knew Taiki from another case they'd been on together, before he'd moved out to Houston.

But capability and intelligence only mattered if they were used effectively. And that was Yaten's job, he had to make sure that he gave them meaningful work to do, and that was going to be the hard part. He knew that the first thing he had to do was confirm the address, then…then he had no idea. He exhaled hard; this was just going to be terrible he just knew it.

What was worse was that the detectives that were handling Mina's case hadn't returned any of his calls, and he was sure that if he called them again he was likely going to be fired. He wanted very badly to hit something; this was certainly the worst mess that had ever been landed his lap in a long, long time.

0000

Mina's door swung in sharply, as a little blur of white flashed in. Mina looked over smiling knowingly, her son was here. She looked up as he rushed up onto the bed, and all but knocking the wind out of her as he threw himself on her in a half hug- half collapse.

"Zack get off your mom's bed, you're going to hurt her." A deep very masculine voice said from her left. She heart pounded at the sound of his voice, Malcolm's presence still made her weak kneed.

"Oh right sorry mommy," Zack replied shamefaced, as he got off the bed. Mina wasn't really listening; she was much too busy looking at Malcolm. She searched his handsome face, absorbing every line of it, as if she were memorizing it, from his hard chin, to his chiseled lips, with the full lower one, to his long, dark lash encased piercing eyes. His platinum facial hair crowned his hard jaw line perfectly, emphasizing the angularity of his features. He was just gorgeous; there was no other word for it. She realized she was staring, a moment before it became obscene and looked away. Mina cursed herself internally for the lack of control, but she simply couldn't help herself, she was so starved for him, so torturously enthralled by him. It was all she could to not to throw herself at his feet and beg him. Mina purposefully forced herself to turn her thoughts from him toward her son.

"It's okay Zack, I missed you baby." She said to her boy.

"Oh mommy, I missed you sooo very much." Zack informed her, and then went off filling her in on all the things she'd missed.

Malcolm hadn't noticed her looking at him; he'd been watching Zack to make sure he got off the bed without hurting her. He didn't dare look at her, least she see his longing. He ached for her, ached to touch her, to hold her in his arms, to be around her…it was just torture looking at her and knowing he couldn't have her. Even so, he helplessly stole glances at her now and again. Her face was still bruised, but to him there was nobody more beautiful than her, with her elfin features and her big stunning blue eyes. She smiled suddenly at her son, and his heart wrenched. He remembered when she used to smile at him like that…

"Malcolm?" Mina called; he looked up at her confused.

"I'm sorry did you ask me something?" He asked her.

"I said, you really didn't have to get Zack new shoes, I was going to buy them for him next month," she repeated slightly embarrassed. She didn't like him knowing how bad off they were.

"It was a Christmas present." He said easily.

"Malcolm…" She began, anxious about his gift giving.

"Mina it was just a pair of shoes, it's not like I bought him a car." He pointed out; cutting off the argument he knew was coming. Mina frowned at him, it wasn't just a pair of shoes; those pair of shoes represented something much darker. Mina didn't have much, just her son, and she did the best she could for him. But whatever she could do for Zack, Malcolm could do much, much more, and it upset her thinking about it. The truth was she didn't want her son to get too used to Malcolm buying them things. And she definitely didn't want Malcolm thinking she was some charity case that needed bailing out. They needed to talk, and now that she was more or less through the woods, was as good a time as any.

"Zack baby, why don't you ask one of those nice bodyguards outside to go with you to the cafeteria and pick up some jello for me?" She asked softly, turning her gaze back to her son.

"Mommy, we got you tacos!" The boy exclaimed excitedly. She smiled weakly .

"That's great, thank you so much for doing that for me. Can you grab mommy some jello to go with it? She persisted; she wanted to talk to Malcolm alone.

"Okay mommy, what color do you want this time?" Zack asked her slightly exasperated; he knew his mother wanted to talk to Malcolm by herself. She didn't even like jello!

"Red sounds good." She told him. "Thank you darling." He left the room rather reluctantly resenting her sending him away. Never the less he grabbed the hand of his favorite guard a burly man named Elvis. The room went instantly quiet, and the undercurrent of awkward tension began to grow. They looked anywhere but at each other for a long time; Mina trying to compose her thoughts, Malcolm waiting patiently for her to speak.

"He sure likes Elvis." Malcolm commented finally, cutting the silence.

"He does," She replied. "I think it's because he showed Zack his dancing tattoo."

"Well that would do it." Malcolm agreed, nodding. Mina cleared her throat uncomfortably, steeling herself.

"Malcolm, we have to talk," She said at last, internally gritting her teeth, she didn't like confrontation at all, least of all with men.

"You're right we do," He said, waiting for her to continue. He knew that this was coming; they were going to have it out about her coming back to the ranch he was sure about it. Well Mina could argue with him until she went blue in the face, he was not taking no for an answer.

"Listen, I know you think you're doing Zack a kindness by buying him things, and I appreciate your generosity, but the truth is your just making it harder for him, once I'm discharged and you leave, we're going to be in for some tough times financially, I don't want him thinking we can just buy things without thinking about the money," She blurted out quickly, her face flaming even as she forced herself to look him in the eye as she admitted her poverty. "Malcolm, we don't have much." She whispered ashamed.

Malcolm was lost for words; that was the very last thing he'd expected from her. He stared at her for a moment trying to process what she was saying.

"Mina, I…I just bought him some shoes," He said, his voice coming out more husky than he meant it. "I had no idea things were so bad for you,"

"Malcolm it may have just been some shoes for you, but for me, that's months of scrimping and saving and lack, and Zack knows it. He knows he doesn't just get things because he wants them…" she began trying to explain.

"He didn't want them Mina, he needed them; his old shoes were hurting his feet. I didn't realize that shoes are a luxury these days, my mistake I'll make sure his things are falling apart next time I think to buy him anything!" Malcolm said angrily, he didn't like that she thought he was somehow spoiling the boy by buying him a pair of shoes!

She felt sick, positively sick, she knew his shoes were getting tight, but she hadn't known they were hurting him. What was worse she had actually insinuated that it was somehow too good for her son to have things that fit. She was certain that she must look like the worst sort of mother right then.

"I didn't know they didn't fit him." She replied honestly. "It isn't easy keeping up with a growing boy on a temp's salary."

"Why don't you teach Mina?" He asked her abruptly, she looked up at him surprised. "That's what your degree was in; you were so good with kids, why don't you do it?" He persisted when she didn't respond.

"You remember?" She said staring at him shocked, it had been five years ago, and she had only vaguely mentioned it.

"Why?" He asked again, unrelenting, it had been nagging him since he'd first seen her at his office. Mina had graduated with top marks in all her classes, and had been a very talented student teacher. In fact she had a brief stint as a substitute teacher in the local elementary back in Red brook, she had been so good that she'd been offered a full time position, but she had been still dealing with her grief at the time and so had turned it down.

"I couldn't find a job." She improvised quickly. The truth was much more complicated, much more horrible. She never stayed in one place long enough to be seriously considered for a teaching position, plus teachers were on a data base, which made them much easier to track. It was just too risky.

"I don't believe that," He said after a minute, scanning her eyes as if he could read her mind. It made Mina uneasy, Malcolm was extremely shrewd; it was why he was so good at what he did.

"It's hard finding a teaching position." She pressed on stubbornly; she refused to let him know the truth.

"It wasn't that hard in Red brook, they loved you at the elementary. I got phone calls from them for months asking if you'd still be interested in a teaching position there." He pointed out, shutting out the hurt that came with the memory of that time. He remembered the horrifying experience of having to relive the loss of her, of having to explain to perfect strangers that she would never be coming back.

"Well I can't very well go back there now can I?" She snapped angrily, hating the memories that statement brought up, hating how much she truly missed home, and hating him for bring it up. She knew she could never go back there, never, he had as much as said that she was not welcome there anymore.

"Yes you can, in fact you are." Malcolm said easily.

"What?" She asked surprised, unsure of what he was getting at.

"Your coming back to the ranch with me." He offered.

"No I am not!" She cried out, appalled by the idea.

"Oh yes you are," He replied calmly. "You couldn't seriously have thought I'd leave you and Zack here by yourselves after everything that's happened did you? Besides which you've already agreed to it."

"I have done no such thing!" She said outraged that the lie; there was no way she would ever have agreed to such a ludicrous proposition. It was plain foolishness , it would put both Malcolm and his brother in danger, not to mention the other thing…she flinched as she considered the catastrophe that would befall her if Malcolm ever figured out…no she pushed that thought out of her mind quickly, he would never find out, because she was not going to allow him to!

"You did," He informed her; still in that damnably calm voice of his. "It's too late to back out of it now Mina, I've already arranged everything."

"How could you!" She gasped out alarmed, he was serious! "How could you do this to me Malcolm? How could you just take the decision right out of my hands?"

"I didn't take anything out of your hands; you agreed to come back to the ranch, a week ago in fact!" He told her vaguely irritated by her outrage, and her accusation. It wasn't his fault that she couldn't remember the conversation after all.

"A week ago, Malcolm a week ago I was so hopped up on painkillers and anesthesia I had no idea what was going on," She said desperately, her eyes wide with fear trying to make him understand. "I can't go back to the ranch with you, I can't!"

"You can't stay here! That man…he wanted to kill you!" He said anguished by the thought of what could have happened to her.

"Exactly, Malcolm he…he could…he could hurt you…" She managed finally stammering out the sentence. Malcolm stared at her for a moment, utterly lost for words; he could not believe that she had said that. He wondered then if she knew what she was admitting to him, with more than her words. Her wide eyes and the tremor in her hands told him something profound…she was afraid…afraid for him!

"Mina…baby," He whispered out softly, reaching toward her, she flinched away instinctively, stopping him before he touched her. His hand froze, surprised, she had never reached to him like that. Not even the first night they'd brought her in after the accident, in fact she had practically thrown herself into his arms then. But now fully aware and conscious she didn't want him too close, and that hurt him deeply. He pulled his hand back and placed it on his lap, frowning.

"Please…please Malcolm….I can't…" She stammered out weakly, dismayed that he had seen her helpless reaction. Malcolm was much too sharp, too sharp not to notice….She pushed that thought to the back of her mind…if he ever found out about her past…

"Mina…I can't!" He replied, "I can't let you stay here knowing you're in danger." He said huskily, looking at her with tormented eyes.

"Yes you can, it won't be so bad…" She began trying to reassure him.

"The hell it won't! Next time Mina he'll actually kill you!" He hissed out at her, frustrated by her illogical behavior. "Listen to me, how can you possibly justify staying here? Your putting both yourself and Zack in danger don't you understand?"

"Of course I understand, I'm not an idiot," She shot back fighting back tears; he had no idea how terrified she really was about this. Mina had to stay strong though, she couldn't allow herself to crumble not with so much at stake. "We'd be leaving Boston of course."

His heart froze, it actually froze! He was absolutely petrified at the thought of her leaving…again! He couldn't lose her, not so soon after everything that had happened. She couldn't just leave into the night; he knew that he would never see her again if she did. He had to make her understand, had to make her realize she had to come back with him, there was simply no other alternative.

"Well if your already planning to leave you should have no trouble coming back to the ranch with me," He said simply, taking the matter entirely out of her hands. "We're leaving as soon as you're discharged," He continued, holding up a hand to silence her sputtered argument, "Don't bother, you're going, even if I have to carry you kicking and screaming onto the plane." He meant it too, she could tell. Wither or not she wanted to go was of little consequence to him, he'd tried reasoning with her, now he was just going to take over, that was how he was, and she already knew it. She wanted to scream, the idiot didn't even understand that she was staying away for his own good!

"Malcolm…he'll…" She began truly desperate now, he had to understand; he just had to!

"Mina I can take care of myself," He cut her off, not allowing her to use him as an excuse.

"So can I!" She roared at him angrily, the first time she had raised her voice to him in months.

"You can't even move!" He shot back at her, "What exactly are you going to do Mina? Have your son play nurse maid and body guard?"

"Damn you!" She whispered back, agonized. He was right! The man was right, there was no way she could take care of herself, no way that she could make ends meet, and there was nobody else that could help her. Tears ran down her cheeks as she realized she was going to have to go home with him. There simply was nothing else for it. She was going to spend months maybe more, alone with him at his ranch, watching him, loving him silently, knowing that she could never have him…it was going to be a bit of heaven mixed up with a ton of hell! Malcolm was a good looking man, and he had money, there was no doubt in her mind that he had women, lots of them. How was she going to bear it? She was dying inside at the thought. Worse still was the fear she felt for him, what if he found her again, he would not hesitate to…she closed her eyes on the wave of terror that seized her heart.

"Go ahead, hate me," He said icily, trying to hide the hurt at her expression, she looked as if she'd been sentenced to life in prison. "You don't have to like me Mina, you don't even have to thank me, all you have to do is get better," With that he got up and walked out of the room, not daring to turn back least she see his face. He was lying, flat out, it was killing him that she hated him, and now he was sure that she did. Her face had said it all, Mina was too kind hearted to let him be hurt on her behalf, but she didn't want to be anywhere near him at all.

0000

Yaten walked into the hospital with a big bouquet of orchids, and a small container of Mexican food. He was absolutely excited to see his best friend again! He was a bundle of nervous energy and butterflies. Yaten had seen her many times in the hospital, but mostly she had been passed out or, too doped up to really talk to him. Now she was fully aware and if Malcolm was to be believed absolutely furious about being forced to come back to the ranch. He sighed as he walked up to the appropriate room, surrounded by body guards, he hoped he could relieve some of the tension, and convince Mina that it simply was the best course of action.

"Well hello there gorgeous," He said with a huge grin on his face. Mina looked up at him and smiled back, holding out her arms to be hugged. He went into them without pause.

"Oh my who are these for?" She asked, smiling from ear to ear, finally someone reasonable to talk to!

"Why you of course, little lady," He said placing the items down on a side table beside her.

"Oh well I guess I'll forgive you then," She said easily flashing her perfect teeth at him. He frowned though not understanding the remark.

"Forgive me for what?" he asked confused.

"Why you terrible man, for not seeing me sooner of course," She replied not unkindly.

"What are you talking about?" He asked completely bewildered. "Mina I've been here every other day,"

"Oh," She said shamefaced. "I…I guess I've really been out of it." She mumbled.

"Well darling, don't you worry yourself over it, you sure didn't miss much." He told her, smiling broad.

"Yah except agreeing to go back to the ranch," She sighed disgusted with herself.

"Now, now it won't be that bad." Yaten said patting her hand, "It'll be like a vacation,"

"Vacation my eye!" She said irritated, "are you going to be there too?"

"I wish darling, but I've got to work," He said. "Not to worry though, I'll come and visit," he promised.

"I guess saving the world comes first." She agreed. "How is being a police officer anyways?"

"It's deeply satisfying, even if it's endless hours and little respect. I made detective you know." He informed her.

"Did you really? That's amazing Yaten, I am so happy for you!" Mina gushed truly excited for her best friend.

"Why thank you, what have you been up to then?" Yaten asked pointedly.

"So I guess you're working on a big case then?" She asked smoothly ignoring his question; Mina didn't want to talk about her recent past, as she imagined that Yaten would be so disappointed in her for what had happened.

"Something like that," He replied evenly, he understood what she was trying to do, and decided to let it drop. She would talk to him when she was ready to. He hoped that she had at least talked to the detectives working her case; it was usually easier to talk about this kind of thing with people you didn't know personally. It was strange but true. He'd look into that when he got back to the station.

"What area are you working in now?" She pressed, wanting to fully steer the conversation toward him.

"Corporate crime, right now anyways," He told her making a face; he truly hated working for that division. "Usually thought I work for SVU,"

"SVU?" She asked confused.

"Special victims unit, I guess you don't watch a lot of TV." He commented, thinking of the 'Law and order' spin off.

"I don't like watching police shows," She said off handed, "It's kind of depressing, I much prefer…"

"Comedies, and kiddy shows." Yaten finished for her with a smile. "I remember," She smiled at him then, remembering how close they used to be. He was her best friend all through university, the only person who didn't seem to care that she wouldn't sleep around, or go drinking every night. Most of her peers had found her boring and commented on it regularly. She had met him rather suddenly, at a frat party a classmate had talked her into going to, and then promptly ditched her at. He had been dating a sorority inductee at the time, and had left her completely high and dry to spend the night talking to Mina. He'd lost the girl, but gained a lifelong friendship for the deal.

"I missed you," She said huskily, hurting for her loss. For five years she had ached for her friendship, five long painful years, where she had avoided contact with the best friend she'd ever had. All because of him, all because of one bad decision she'd made.

"I missed you too," He told her softly, brushing back a tear that had slip from her eyes, "Why didn't you ever call me Mina?" He asked her finally.

"I…I couldn't…" She whispered achingly, hating the hurt she heard in his voice.

"Why? Surely not because of Malcolm," He asked her pushing her now, "Tell me Mina."

"No…not because…I…I just couldn't…" She managed, hating herself for not being stronger, for not having fought more.

"Mina, the doctors told us about your…previous accidents." He offered, watching her face closely, her eyes dilated in fear, and she paled. "Tell me about them,"

"NO!" She said quickly, shaking her head vigorously, "I can't…I won't talk about that." She said in a rush.

"Not with me," he accepted easily, "Mina, I would never…" He began trying to ease her into the conversation.

"Please Yaten…." She whimpered, tears flowing freely now, "I can't…"

"Alright Mina, I won't push," He agreed softly, "But someday I hope you'll be able to talk to me,"

"Yaten," She began trying to find the words to explain, "It…it was horrible, I just…it's just too much to talk to anybody about." She managed at the end.

"Mina, please, please tell me you've at least talked to the detectives working your case about what happened?" Yaten asked frantic now, refusing to believe what she was implying.

"I told them everything I remembered about the…accident." She agreed.

"Mina! You know what I mean," He admonished horror struck "You have to tell them everything, everything!"

"It…it has nothing to do with this…" She said weakly, averting her eyes, she couldn't bear to talk about what he had done to her.

"Oh you little fool," Yaten moaned out angrily, putting his face in his hands, trying to find a way to explain that she was sabotaging her own case. "Mina, they need to know everything about this guy, don't you understand…everything he's ever done to you." He said watching her face closely, he nodded his head at her reaction he'd been on the money and he knew it now.

"But that has...." She began desperately.

"Everything to do with this case, Mina, he's hurt you before…they have to know about it." He explained to her, frustration written across every line of his face, he wanted to hunt the bastard down, and murder him with his own bare hands for what he'd done to Mina.

"I…I can't talk about it…" She managed, terror clouding her eyes, as she pulled back from Yaten, the look in his eyes frightening her. Yaten saw it and instantly calmed himself; he would not have his best friend afraid of him.

"Alright, you don't have to tell them exactly what he did to you," he agreed softly, calming the tone and pitch of his voice to sooth her, "But you might at least tell them what he looks like, and what his name is."

"I can't," She told him alarmed. "He…he'll…" she tried feebly.

"Mina honey, your safe now, you're going to be miles away by the end of the week, at the ranch, surrounded by guards, and my brother, we won't let anything happen to you…ever again." He promised her, watching her, taking in her expression.

"I can't go to the ranch Yaten," she said exhaustedly, tired of arguing the point with Malcolm, and now sensing she'd have to do the same with Yaten, so much for talking to someone reasonable.

"You have to go to the ranch," He told her simply. "You can't think that we'd let you stay here." He said reasonably.

"No, I guess you won't let me." She said resignedly, "No matter what I say." She agreed.

"No we won't, honey-child." He agreed, easily calling her the nick name her mother had given her as a child. The nick name he'd taken to calling her once he'd met her parents.

"They loved you, you know, they thought I should marry you," She told him weakly, remembering her beloved parents. They really had loved the blond man; he'd charmed both of them, even her preacher father. They'd thought his old world manners and wonderful sense of humor perfectly complemented Mina's calm demeanor and kindly heart. But Mina had never felt anything like that for Yaten; he was like a brother to her.

"That's only because they didn't know about my reputation," He said blandly, remembering those days vividly, "they wouldn't have wanted me anywhere near you if they'd known you were spending time with the university player." He reminded her, coldly.

"You were hardly a player…" She began defensively, she hated remembering the nick names, and horrible things the other girls in her dorm had used to refer to Yaten, imply he was the school trophy boy.

"I hardly am anymore, not with this on my face." He interrupted easily, running a finger against the scar on his cheek; he didn't like remembering the reputation he'd garnered for himself in those days. It was both embarrassing and painful, he'd hardly wanted…but it didn't matter now, that had been years ago.

"Oh please, your still sinfully sexy," She said easily brushing aside his comment, "In fact you look rather…roguish with it." She offered smiling wide.

"Well thank you darling," He said smiling back, "Nice to know some women still think I'm pretty."

"Pretty, hell you're handsome you smug devil and you know it." She told him easily, "Refined good looks that you should get down on bended knee and thank your mother for every single day!"

"Me? What about you little lady, you ought to be offering burnt sacrifices for your spectacular looks." He teased back, enjoying the game that they'd been playing for years. They flirted with each other easily, but it had always been a gigantic joke, Yaten had never thought of Mina in that way, in fact they had always been more like brother and sister than anything else. She burst out laughing, her first time in months that she'd laughed.

Malcolm's heart twisted as he heard it; of course his brother would be able to bring the joy back into her clouded eyes, when all he could do was make her cringe and back away. Malcolm almost swore, at the sight of her, she would never laugh with him the way she was laughing with his brother. He'd come by the hospital with her favorite flowers, and some books, because she'd mentioned she had nothing to do with herself, only to find his brother had beat him to the punch. Malcolm turned away from the door jam, and walked back to the nurse's station, dumping the newly purchased flowers in the trash, and placing the books down on desk, with a hurriedly scribbled note that they were for Mina.

He could just imagine that his charming brother was exactly what a disheartened Mina needed now, someone to comfort her and kiss away all her hurts. Something Malcolm had never been able to be for her, try as he might all he could seem to do was hurt her, and scare her. He roughly ran a hand through his hair as he walked out of the hospital, and toward his car, he knew he had no right to be jealous at all, Mina wasn't his. So what if his brother and her ended up together, surely they should have years ago, even if his brother had sworn up and down that he didn't think of Mina that way. Malcolm knew better, his brother was the "Cherry-popper" the man who had loved women by the droves, especially virgins. So what if Malcolm had beaten him to chase with Mina, surely he'd ruined intimacy with her, something no doubt his brother would be more than happy to change her mind on.

He almost choked on the thought, it would of course serve Malcolm right for what he'd done to Mina, but the idea was crushing. Though he pushed it out of his mind hurriedly, she deserved happiness, even if it was with his stupid brother, he really felt that, but a part of him wanted to walk right back into the hospital and lay his brother out. He cringed at the thought, he wasn't anything to Mina, and he had best remember that.

He'd take care of her, he decided in the end, take a back seat to her feelings for Yaten if need be. He'd be kind and companionate, but keep his distance; he wouldn't stand in the way of Yaten and Mina. He wouldn't allow himself to grow attached to her again either; he'd make sure of it. Malcolm owed her that much at least.

0000

Malcolm's private jet was warm and comfortable Mina thought absently as she lay back on the fully reclined leather chair. It screamed of the difference between them, he had money to spare, and Mina had barely enough to pay her rent most months. It was another wedge between them, which Mina had naively ignored when she'd first met him. She had never thought about money then, because she'd never really had to worry about it.

Her Parents' hadn't been wealthy by any means, but they'd never allowed her to want for anything. Her parents had been wanders by nature, much before they'd ultimately given themselves to the church, and so they too had never thought much about money or possessions. It had been a nasty shock for Mina to find out, month's after they'd died, that they'd borrowed heavily against their insurance policy, essentially leaving her with nothing. It had been the worst kind of horror to realize that she had nothing and nobody to call her own, it had almost destroyed her. But she was strong now; she knew how to survive, even if her existence was meager.

All she had in her life was her son, and if truth be told, he was the only reason she was going to the ranch. She knew she couldn't protect him right now, but Malcolm could. It irked her to need him again; it irked her to need anybody. She had learned the hard way that in life, one could only count on themselves, it was a lesson that she had learned over and over again over the last five years.

Mina rubbed the sore muscles on the side of her calve, soothing away the nagging pain from the last surgery she'd had to endure. At least all of that was over, she thought with a sigh, if she never saw another hospital it would be too soon.

"Mommy, isn't it pretty?" Her son called out to her, from across the plane, she looked up and smiled at him, his nose pressed against the window.

"Yes darling it sure is." She agreed, looking out the window onto what was surely Texas, judging by the sheer size and beauty of the landscape.

"I think those are horses!" Her son exclaimed pointing out the wandering ant like dots he was seeing,

"No baby those are cars," She said with an indulgent smile, "Horses don't go that fast."

"Oh…" He said, "Do horse come in white mommy?" He asked curiously.

"Oh yes sweet heart, I think they call those appaloosas, or Arabians," She replied, "I don't know all that much about horse sweetie."

"Malcolm does!" Zack informed her with a wide happy grin, "He told me all about cowboys and rodeos, when I grow up I want to be a rodeo cowboy!" He told him mother.

"Just like Malcolm was," She agreed with a smile.

"I only did a little barrel racing," Came a voice from the speakers, Mina jumped not realizing how close the cockpit was to where they were, and how good Malcolm's hearing was.

"Really? How do you race a barrel?" Zack called back fascinated.

"You don't race a barrel honey-child, you race horses around barrels." Mina explained to her son, with a smile. This was the first time in a long time that her son was acting his age, she hadn't seen him this excited in a long, long time. It hurt her to think about why her sweet little boy had been forced to grow up much before he should have.

"That sounds like fun!" Her son informed her smiling, "Will you teach me how?"

"I…" Mina began, about to explain she had no idea how to do it either,

"Of course I will kid." Malcolm said over the speaker amused, cutting her off.

"You don't have to do that, Mr. Miller," The boy called back, alarmed, he'd been talking to his mother. He had learned at a young age not to ask for anything, except from his mother. He looked quickly at his mother, who also looked surprised. He didn't want to make problems for his mommy, not like he used to...with the bad man. He flinched embarrassed by his outburst, frowning he looked away from the window.

"It'll be fun, I thought you're mommy how to ride you know," Malcolm called back blissfully unaware of the tension in his cabin, he was simply thinking about the joy riding had always brought him as child.

Tears ran down Mina's face as she remembered that day, and the days that followed it, it hurt her fiercely to think about how much she'd loved the big man, only to have him reject her. Zack jumped up from his seat and dashed over to his mother, he sat next to her, and using his small hands rubbed away her tears, and pulled himself into a hug around his mother's neck.

"I'm sorry mommy, I'm sorry! I don't want to be a rodeo cowboy honest, I don't want to learn how to barrel race, don't cry please mommy!" The little boy whimpered frantically to his mother, feeling terrible for making her cry, she didn't need any more worries, he knew that, and he was being a bad boy he knew it, just like the bad man used to say… Zack was forever causing his mommy problems.

"Oh Zack," She whispered pulling her son close with her good arm, "its okay baby, mommy's fine, you can be anything you want to be honey-child, you know that. Oh, I love you so much my little man."

"I love you too mommy," Zack told her, nuzzling his mother neck, "I don't need to know how to ride." He informed her.

"Sure you do kid, don't worry it's not scary at all." Malcolm's voice came over the speaker, unaware of the conversation between mother and son. Only catching the last thing the boy had said. "Are you okay with me teaching him Mina?" He asked belatedly, realizing that he couldn't very well take Mina's son riding without her permission.

"Oh yes its fine with me." Mina replied huskily, helplessly, she couldn't deny her son the opportunity. This might well be the only time her son would ever be around horses, and he'd given up so much for her already, she wouldn't allow him to give this up too. "As long as it's no trouble," She added, not wanting to impose on Malcolm either.

"Oh it's no trouble at all; he'll love it I think." Malcolm said, smiling. He'd very much enjoyed spending time with the sweet little boy, when they were together Malcolm could almost imagine that they were father and son; that Mina had never left. It was the sweetest form of torture that was for sure. Besides that Malcolm had never met a better behaved, less spoiled child in his life, and he rather enjoyed the treating the little boy to things. He supposed the long dormant paternal side of him was awoken by the boy, and he rather liked the feeling. He had wanted children once…but now he'd resigned himself to a life of quiet loneliness.

"I think he will too," she replied softly, looking out the window again hiding her longing. She would never stop loving him, she was sure. Her eyes wandered restlessly over the quickly ascending landscape, watching to see if she'd be able to pick out Duke Ranch, the Miller homestead. Her heart ached for it, like a flower reaching out for the sun, she had longed for the ranch.

"If you look out to your left Zack, you'll be able to see some cattle." Malcolm's voice called over the speakers again, Zack hurriedly gazed out over his mother's head, to the animals beneath them. "Those are black angus," he informed them. "We're almost home, now those are my neighbor's cows, if you look toward the fenced off region you'll be able to see his bulls, the big one is a Ramo Grande. Right there to the right."

"Wow he sure is pretty." Mina remarked, looking at the big beast.

"No he's not, that big monster is hideous compared to my purebred Texas long horns." Malcolm commented, amusement ringing in his tone. "And he's a pile of beef compared to my Red Angus."

"Everything is a pile of beef compared to old Diablo." Mina replied, remembering his beloved bull. "You hand feed that overgrown cow." She reminded him.

"Diablo doesn't like eating alone," Malcolm replied defensively, "He's still a baby, don't pick on him."

"A baby my foot! He's bigger than both of us, and he's ten years old if he's a day."She remarked. "Besides he's a grand daddy by now."

"He's sired a lot of price cattle," He agreed, "But he's still my baby." Mina had to laugh at that, she remembered vividly the beautiful bull following Malcolm around like a large puppy, nuzzling him like he was the bull's mommy. Malcolm had been completely devoted to the bull; make sure that he planned his own meals in such a way as to be free during feeding time. More than once Mina had caught him sitting with his beloved pet, cooing to it, as if he were with an infant.

Her laughter rang out in the cockpit; it sent a thrill down Malcolm's smile. He'd made her laugh! He'd actually made her laugh, for the first time since what had happened. Maybe it wouldn't be so terrible after all.

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He stretched out his legs as best he could in the overcrowded bus. His long spider like fingers, fiddling with the silken lock of hair he'd taken from Mina. He braided the hair easily, and then unwound in with casual flicks of his finger; he worked it over and over again, each time savoring the sensation of the golden softness against his roughened fingertips.

He imagined it was still attached to her, that she could feel his fingers invading the length of it. He smiled to himself, she was his for the taking, and did she really think she could get away from him? She could run as far away as she liked, he always found her; she belonged to him, just as this strand of her hair did. Every part of her was his, and she knew it, just as surely as he did.

He brought her hair to his face, brushing it against his rough cheek, imagining it was her full head of hair against him. He imagined pulling her long hair taut in his hands, pressing his face into her throat, her pulse jumping there. He imagined how happy she'd be once he destroyed that Miller bastard, once he made her watch his blood spill out against the floor, how thrilled she be to be back with him.

Then he'd take her home, back to where she belonged, back with him. This time she would never get away from him again, he'd made sure he'd gotten stronger locks this time; he remembered that she hadn't like the chains, he'd fix that too. He knew he hadn't treated her well, he'd ignored her, spent too much time working, and drinking, not this time though, he'd be around her all the time, he'd never let her leave, she wouldn't have to worry about the chains because this time he'd just break both her legs!

He smiled at the thought of being back with her, this time he'd make sure she had no excuse to ever leave him, this time she'd be his forever, the problem was all the other people that kept poisoning her mind, all of them telling her he was bad, like that boy! His crying and whining had put a wedge between them; it had ruined their perfect relationship. Well he had given that boy to her, and he could take him away, that was all there was to it.

And when she was good again, and had paid for what she'd done, then maybe he'd give her another baby, a better baby. One that didn't cry and whine! Zack was a bad seed; he was poison, dirty, disgusting, because he was a boy. Boys were bad, just like his mother had said. Boys were disgusting, he should have given Mina a girl; he should have listened to his mother, and killed both of them when they were in her…he'd killed his sister, he was a dirty, disgusting thing…

He shook himself hard, he had to have Mina; she made the bad things go away. This time he wouldn't let her go, not ever again. That Miller had taken her away, far away, like he thought he was an idiot! Miller thought he could take his Mina, and he'd just let her go? Never, not even if he had to follow her all the way to the ends of the earth…he would never let her go!

He relaxed back into his chair, smelling the lock of her hair; that man was actually taking her to Texas, to his Texas! He knew so many people all over that state; he would have her back before long. He almost laughed, she was going back to Texas, she really wanted him to find her, he was sure of it now. No way did she think to escape him in his home state!

It wouldn't be long now, and the ache inside him would be filled again, his Mina was coming home.

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A/n: okay what did you guys think? This is the end of chapter one, had decided to rewrite it because I basically hated the way it came across originally, so let me know how you feel about this rewrite. Let me know, love it, hate it? Review, people, review!