So i got really bored tonight and decided to procrastinate on the rest of my stories and write a one shot. I dunno, one shots seem to cure me of my writing blocks, so here ya go!
Pairing: kai/rei (doi)
Summary: Kai's p.o.v on an argument he and Rei are having. Angst/fluff at the end. Rated because of Kai's potty-mouth. Pairing: kai/rei. Enjoy.
Warning: This fic contains yaoi (boy/boy lovin') by my two fav. characters evah. Lot's o cussing as well. Oh yah, and typos...be aware of those suckers.
Remember this is in kais p.o.v
Have fun!!!
I have no fucking idea how it came to this.
I have no clue why your eyes are soft and dreary like that.
I still havent figured out why there are tears running down your face, and why you're looking at me like that. Like im some sort of fucking psycho, or that i've lost my mind, which seems to be happening.
Maybe it could be the broken plate by your feet, or maybe its the fact that i'm glaring you into a hole in the fucking ground.
I dont know, and i'm damn tired of feeling confused right now. Why can't you just answer me correctly? Its not that hard Rei, if I ask you a simple question, I expect a simple answer. Use those neurons in that pretty little head of yours Rei, and tell me what the hell you want. Otherwise your wasting my time, and right now, with me being as angry as I am, I couldnt give a shit at what your mad about.
Come to think of it, how the hell did we come around to this argument? Could it be the fact that youve been talking to Tala alot lately...has the red-head gone and fucked something else up for me? I know it's not fair to him, im just angry...but honestly, he could have let me told you instead of blabbing that big fucking mouth of his. Right now, I hate every fucking thing about him, and I couldnt give a shit.
Iv'e been saying that alot. I really dont fucking care as to why your shaking right now, or why you've stopped looking at me with those torturous pools of gold. And for some damned reason, I want your eyes on me again. Perhaps its because I can read you like an open book when you're like this, and it fucking helps because i'm not a mind reader Rei. I dont know what youre thinking or feeling, or why the hell you're trying to hold back a wave of sobs. Dont even try Rei, I know you're trying not to break down infront of me right now. You dont hide it that well, don't give yourself that much credit. Like I said, youre like an open book Rei, and the pain written across your face is more than I need to know that youre upset or pissed off at me. Then again you'd think the violent yelling and smashing of kitchen dishes would give away that were upset with one another right now.
What the hell is pissing me off so much right now? Is it because of the argument, or the fact that you wont give me a fucking straight answer. Newsflash Rei, you fucking suck at arguing if all you do is cry. Be a man damnit and give me a fucking straight answer so I can pack up and get the hell out of here.
Then finally, your trembling lips part, and I finally get a damn answer. That's right tiger, move your mouth and give me some fucking words to work with.
"Because...because I d-dont want you to ...l-leave..."
Well what the fuck am I supposed to do with that? Elaborate kitten, im not a fucking genius over here.
"N-never mind Kai...you wont listen to me anyway so whats the point..."
Wont listen to you? Why the fuck do you think im standing here in the first place?! Stand your ground damnit! Why wont you ever fucking fight me like Tyson does? Sometimes I wish you would, just so we dont have to beat around the fucking bush like we do in so many of our arguments.
I growl suddenly, my famous temper getting the best of me, "Just tell me what the fuck you want Rei..."
I watch as you slowly bend down, hands still shaking, and pick up the shards of what was once a plate. God you piss me off. Stand up and tell me what you want, dont just ignore me and act like im not here. Now I feel like a five year old, just a couple a minutes ago you were staring at me and now you wont even take a glance at me. Do something Rei, you have to give me something to work with in this argument. You really are starting to piss me off, and I mean really piss me off. How come you're the only one that does this? Why can't I just fucking yell and scream at you like I do with everyone else. Correction, I do yell and scream at you, just not to this extent. It's never gotten this bad between you and I. What in the hell happened?
God damnit just fucking answer me for once!
I storm over to you and push you roughly against the cabinets. Gracefully, you land on that cute little tush and your back arches slightly in shock against the wooden doors. As much as I love to see that delightful body of yours bend at my will, its not really the reaction I wanted.
"Just fucking answer me Rei..."
Come on, put it into to words tiger. Just tell me how much you hate it when we fight like this so I can ignore it and leave this damn house. My fingers dig into your shoulders painfully, but you dont seem to really care. You're looking at the broken plate in your hand and not at me again. Just fucking look at me Rei, throw me a bone here im trying my best to read your mind. Give me some attention or something, at least let me know that your alive.
I'm hovering over you, practically pining you to the ground and glaring at you intently. Then suddenly your head swings up and youre eyes connect with mine.
You glare at me with everything you have, youre eyes clearly glazed over with tears.
...Now I feel like im in another dimension. When did your eyes become full of hate and betrayl? Why are your lips parted and heavy sobs shaking your entire frame? Did I really make you that mad...did I really upset you to this point?
Right now I feel low...probably lower then I've felt in a while. I claim to be able to read you like an open book...so why am I just now seeing these feelings when I know you've had them since the moment I walked through the door? Why am I shaking right now just seeing you like this?
Why? I fucking know why...because as much as I like it when we fight...it fucking kills me to see you cry like this. Especially when I know i'm the one that caused it. Fuck...I never thought I could do something like this to you. I never thought my words and my actions could cause you to sob and shake against the cabinets like this. Im such a fucking hyposcrite. I always promised you that if someone had ever hurt you like this, they would suffer horribly. Well...here's my fucking payback, because its killing me to sit here and watch you fall apart like this. As much as I wanted an answer from you...I dont want one now. I just want you to stop crying, but for my own selfish reasons. You think youre falling apart right now Rei? You have no clue what your doing to me at this moment.
For some reason my hand moves on it's own and makes it's way to your face. You look up at me...and flinch. You flinched Rei...I never, ever in my years of knowing you wanted to hurt you. But here you are, shrinking back at the thought of my hand even gracing that lovely tan skin of yours. You were never supposed to be scared of me...not you. Hell, I dont care if Tyson or Max are scared of me, but never you, I could never hurt you like that.
Hn...once again i'm being a hypocrite. If I never wanted to hurt you like that, then why in the hell is there glass on the floor? Why the fuck did I ever throw that plate in the first place? I don't blame you Rei, i'd be upset at me too.
Then it hits me as I stare wide eyed at you. I finally figured out the reason you've been crying and why you won't answer me. It's not because of the fact taht I might potentially be leaving this house...its because youre scared isnt it?
You're scared of being alone arent you...
I know you are, you've told me so yourself. You don't want me to go without you...is that right? Is that the reason why were having this argument? Because you want to leave with me...or because you just dont want to miss me. I know Rei...your terrified of being alone. Hell, we're both scared of it. Isn't that why we "betrayed" our teams? We seem to be really good at leaving people behind, my tiger. When really, we're scared that they'll just ignore us...or leave us. So, it's just easier for us to leave isn't it? Isn't that why were here now? Because im leaving...again. Is that why your crying now? Because I've ignored you for the last week?
Well fuck...
Guess who feels like an ass now...
I dont know what to do. Just by looking into your eyes I know you don't want me to leave. You don't want to feel alone again, and I know you're tired of moving around.
I'm sorry...
I'm sorry that this is the only form of apology I can think of right now. I'm sorry that i've hurt you so badly tonight and im so god damned sorry for making you cry like this.
I'm sorry that im just sitting here gawking at you right now.
For some reason, that thought triggers my arms into wrapping around your slim frame, and I can feel your body raise off of the floor and mold into mine. I can feel you stiffen against me immediatly.
Don't...just don't. I can barely stand the fact that you've flinched away from me, don't stiffen up when I touch you like this. Your killing me Rei...
"K-kai..."
Stop saying my name like that...stop saying it like your shocked that i'm holding you right now. Because right now...I dont want you to think about anything, I just want you to feel me, like I can feel your heart beating against my chest right now.
You must be reading my mind right now kitten, because you relax and rest your head on my shoulder. I plant my arrogant little ass down on the floor, lifting you off of it and into my lap, where I can crush your body against mine in apology.
That's the great thing about you and I, Rei...theres no need for words between us, we can tell what the others thinking just by actions.
As time goes by, your sobs subside and im sitting here rocking you in my arms. Youve completly curled into me, your gentle hands against my chest and your head at my neck. I can feel your hot breath against my skin, and its driving me insane. As much as i'd like to lay you on the floor and take you right now...i know that's just my fantasy, and you'd probably be frightened slightly at me.
I hear you snifle as your crying stops.
"Kai..."
"Hmm..?" I mumble, running my fingers through your long hair.
I can feel you frown against my the skin of my neck, "Don't go anywhere where I cant go with you..."
And then I feel wetness of my neck again. Oh no you dont...don't start crying agian, not when I just got you to stop.
"Don't worry...i'm not going anywhere for a while...atleast not without you.." I say kissing your forehead. I'm suprised that you take comfort in the little kisses I give you, the very...un Kai-like kisses. No wonder people think were in a relationship, we act like it all the damn time. Why the hell aren't we? As much as i'd like us to be something more...and I know you know we are...now isn't really the time to discuss a relationship. But if you dont stop wiggling that pretty little ass of yours on my crotch, were gonna have some problems kitten.
"Kai..."
"Yes kitten..." I ask, still rocking you back and forth.
"You must be really excited that im sitting on your lap..." I can feel that evil smirk against my skin. My skin heats up in a blaze, a heavy blush settles across the bridge of my nose.
"Way to ruin the moment, smart ass..."
You smile again...I like it when you do that.
"Well, it's hard to concentrate on calming down when theres something inevitably...hard...rubbing up against my rear end."
I smirk and look down at you, "Well stop wiggling that pretty ass of yours of my poor genitals and we wont have a problem..."
I can hear you giggle at me and snuggle into my neck again.
"Kai..."
I believe that's the third time you've called my name like that tonight kitten.
"Yes dear..."
I say that last word with an attitude, and it makes you laugh again.
You sigh deeply as if thinking.
"What is it Rei?...If it's about the fight we had, im so-"
"I love you..."
...What the hell? You love me?...Me? I think I resemble a fish right now. My body is completly paralyzed and my mouth is flapping open and shut. How can you say that with such certainty? Me? Me, Rei? I can't think...why cant I fucking think?!
I feel your breath catch in your throat, as you start to raise yourself from the warmth of my body. "S-sorry...just forget I said anything..."
Forget you said anything? I think not!
"Get your ass back down here..." I say harshly, yanking you back into my lap. You fall rather clumsily back into position on my lap. The funny thing is, as soon as you land on me, you cling to my body almost instantly. I can see your eyebrows knit in confusion.
"Kai?"
"Shut up..."
And my lips decend on yours. Damn it's the best feeling iv'e ever had in my life, I can finally tell you how amazing you are just by doing the one thing i've wanted to do ever since i've met you. Well...kissing and...other things. I can hear you wimper against my lips, and I can taste the saltiness of your tears. You're crying again, I know. It's my fault too...were never really clear with one another, have you noticed that?
I pull away and crush your to my body, rubbing your back.
"K-kai?" You say again weakly.
I pull you back and look at you. You're looking at me with pleading eyes...and for the first time in my life, I smile. A genuine smile, only for you my kitten... you heard me...my kitten.
"I love you too..."
Suddenly you look at me like im a moron.
I raise an eyebrow, "What, am i not allowed to love you back?"
You shake your head violently, and if possible, your tears flow even faster.
"N-no...i just thought...t-that-"
"That i would say no? Not on your fucking life..."
You look up at me and smile with those pretty little eyes of yours.
"You mean it Kai? You a-aren't trying t-to...trick me?"
My god you look so irresistible right now. Am I trying to trick you? I don't think so kitten...
"No, i'm not...I love you Rei..."
I'm sorry love, im not really good with words, as you know. The worry pratically melts off of your face and you lean in and sob into my shoulder.
This time I'll let you cry. It definitely has been an emotional night. I pull your face up to meet mine again, and kiss your tears away. You smile again and look at me.
"I knew you had to say yes..." you whisper.
"Mmmm...how so?" I ask planting kisses all over your face.
"Well...how many people can sit on your lap and give you an instant boner, but me?"
I stopped my kisses to raise an eyebrow at you.
"You sure have a sharp tounge tonight, love."
"Only for you...dear."
I smile and capture your lips in another kiss.
This night has been a crazy one. I go from loathing you, to loathing me, then confessing my love to you, and now were talking about my penis (which, ofcourse, only reacts to you). Though I don't care. I have you and i'm not letting you go for a long time.
I feel more than I hear you moan as my tounge slyly enters your mouth. You taste like herbs and tea, exactly how I imagined you. As my tounge slides over yours, I can feel your body shiver and rub against mine boldly. Suddenly your arms are around my neck as you put your full body into our second kiss. My arms seem to have mimicked yours as they wind their way around your waist even tighter. I feel your legs wrap around my waist as you rub us together, making me moan harshly into our kiss. Come to think of it, this is what Tala must have had in mind. Remind me to kiss the ground he walks on later. When we break apart because of lack of oxygen, i glare at you slightly.
"If you don't stop doing that, i'm not going to be responsible for what happens"
You giggle at my statement, "Oh...You mean this?" I grunt loudly as you rub that sinful bottom into me again.
"Rei...i'm warning you..."
You kiss me again, "Warn me all you want Mr.Hiwatari...it still wont make me stop wanting you..."
Oh now thats dirty...
"Rei...in all seriousness, you need to stop before I take your pretty little ass on this kitchen floor right now."
Silence falls between us for a second.
"...Why don't we move upstairs to the bed then?"
...I fucking love you.
yay, k/r sex is hawt. well i hope you enjoyed it, i think this is about the longest one shot ive ever written. i'll update my other fics as soon as i can, i just really wanted to wrtie this.
i think its so funny how i made kai an ass in the beginning. But once i started reading over it, he kinda went a little OCC there. sorry if it bothers you. i also realized that i made kai cuss ALOT in this. oh well, hes a cussing sailor. Rei's also a bit horny in this...silly kitty.
if you review i might do a sequel (full of hot man smex)
thanks for reading!