Disclaimer: I don't own Ranma
Preferred Shampoo of Choice
By bigbabidi
The Kiss of Death sucked.
Saotome Ranma wouldn't deny that even if such a claim healed his curse.
Why, oh why, did Genma and he have to be on the verge of starving to death when they entered Joketsuzoku? In addition, why didn't he just run away when the foreign blue haired girl challenged him? So much could've been easily avoided if father and son would've thought with their brains instead their stomachs, followed by Ranma's pride; which effectively added fuel to the already gargantuan flames.
The few months that followed the incident to his arrival in Japan were easily considered hell on earth during the time spent as a girl. Traveling in his cursed form, Ranma quickly discovered the Kiss of Death wasn't just a clever title. Walking down the road translated to running for dear life from incoming arrows, swords and various other weapons in Shampoo's arsenal. Any relaxation or comfort while eating out was also shattered; as they had to remain vigilant in case Shampoo decided to destroy another wall from her immense feminine fury. Hell, Ranma and Genma probably would've arrived at the Tendo household much earlier if the majority of their time wasn't spent hiding from the cute Amazon's wrath.
Ranma blinked. 'Why exactly am I remembering this again?'
His answer came in the sound of a broken war club slipping off someone's head onto the floor. Ranma's eyes widened when the reality of the past few minutes came crashing down. Unless his mind decided to play the trick of the century, Ranma clearly remembered knocking Shampoo out cold while defending Akane from the Amazon's war club barrage.
While that in itself wasn't so bad, the penalty came from defeating Shampoo as a male; undeniably ensuring another Kiss of Death with his name on it. If he were a lesser man, Saotome Ranma would've cried on the spot.
He had no desire in imagining a life that included twenty four hour evasion from a vengeful Shampoo. Ranma's times spent in China as a male were golden moments. Occasions meant to be savored as he traveled throughout the country, unchecked and unchallenged by powerful Chinese Amazons. Having that freedom stripped away would've been akin to stealing food from a starving child and leaving it to die.
Okay, maybe not that far, but it came close.
Ranma was cut off from his inner musing/whining upon noticing Shampoo's arousal back into the living. When the girl stood, he noticed her bleary state of awareness. With that in mind, he began conjuring up an escape plan. Once she locked eyes with his, however; all scheming flew out the window as Ranma's anxiety went into overdrive.
For every instant her small bare feet stepped towards him, the martial artist felt his doom approaching closer and closer. Maintaining distance between them, Ranma stepped back, followed by a quick sidestep to the left. As he frantically tried to convince Shampoo of her superiority, the pigtailed boy failed to notice a smug Ryoga standing behind him.
With a smile glued to his face, Ryoga pushed his rival towards certain disaster while he exclaimed, "Take your Kiss of Death like a man!"
As he fell onto Shampoo, Ramna couldn't do a thing as she… hugged him? That certainly wasn't what he expected. Even so, the martial artist couldn't deny the way he felt himself heating up from her touch.
'What's… happenin' to me?' He thought nervously. The feeling he experienced was much stronger than the slight attraction he felt when holding Akane during one of their encounters with Kuno. As Ranma felt her hands gently encircling his neck, he noticed Shampoo's eyes gazing deeply into his own. The pigtailed boy found himself mesmerized as he stared into her beautiful brown orbs. 'I never noticed it before… but Shampoo's REALLY cute.'
Enthralled, Ranma barely heard the girl softly whispering something that sounded like 'wo-ai-ni'. Before any chance of questioning arose, Shampoo turned her head sideways and quickly shoved her lips into his.
To this day, Ranma wasn't sure if his brains cells kicked it into high gear at that moment or if he'd received the epiphany of a lifetime as he contemplated his next course of action. While he was definitely attracted to the Chinese Amazon and was most certainly turned on by the kiss, already being engaged made things a bit difficult. On one hand, Ranma's safest route came from continuing his arrangement with Akane. On the other hand, he'd never wanted said engagement to begin with.
Ever since he'd arrived at the Tendo household, Ranma and Akane didn't get along from the start. It was literally guaranteed daily that the martial artist received a plethora of severe beat-downs from the youngest Tendo. Sometimes he deserved it, while others were obvious overreactions on her part even when conflicting evidence glared her in the face before it happened. Although their relationship had slightly improved since the beginning, so many negatives vastly overshadowed the few positives.
Add Ryoga to the equation and giving into to Shampoo seemed even wiser. Pig or no pig, Akane had always treated his rival far greater than himself. He'd really rather not imagine whatever activities occur when Akane spends every night snuggled up with her precious P-chan. The thought of those two in bed made him sick to his stomach. With such a disturbing idea on his mind, Ranma nearly spewed out the contests of the parfait eaten prior to their arrival. If it wasn't for the immense pleasure he was receiving in waves from Shampoo, he probably would have.
While Shampoo displayed aggressive behavior as well, such violent tendencies were restricted to his female form. The way she touched him, the way she kissed him most certainly did not resemble the actions of her earlier 'kill Ranma' binges she displayed back in China. While he couldn't say with a hundred percent guarantee that Shampoo's personality surpassed Akane's, Ranma assumed that was the case and hoped for the best. There'd obviously be a great deal of work involved, such as teaching Shampoo proper Japanese and getting to know the girl better and vice versa, but Ranma saw this as a second chance that needed to be taken, no matter what.
In the end, he decided the pros of returning Shampoo's affection easily outweighed the cons. Sure, Genma and Soun will throw a sissy fit, but the younger Saotome had no intention of taking any crap lying down. With that in mind, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled the girl closer, inadvertently rubbing her bosom against his chest. As Shampoo's eyes widened and lightly gasped in surprise from Ranma's action, the pigtailed boy took the presented opportunity and eagerly returned the kiss. Hearing the Amazon's soft moan from such an intimate gesture excited the boy, and fueled him with the desire to continue.
Shampoo was pleasantly surprised to say the least. Growing up under Amazon tribal laws, the blue haired girl often wondered if she'd ever face defeat from a male outsider and if so, what kind of person he'd be? Even though she was one of the strongest fighters from her village, the thought still lingered in the back of her mind. She'd seen other Amazons lose to a male and some ended up as nothing more than baby-making machines, stripped away from their weapons and forced to serve an uncaring husband.
But Ranma… he was different. She could tell. Initially, Shampoo was a bit worried when the man who defeated her froze upon receiving her kiss. Ranma's gentle touch, however, quickly washed away her concerns. He held her like a treasure worth far more than a thousand diamonds instead of a worthless slab of meat discarded after its' use like an unwanted toy. That was enough to make Shampoo's happiness soar to colossal heights.
The two continued their make-out session totally oblivious to the ever-growing blazing inferno otherwise known as an infuriated Tendo Akane.
Although her initial impulse was chucking the broken war club she picked up off the floor towards Ranma's skull; seeing him reciprocating the Amazon's kiss diminished Akane's violent compulsion. She was seething with anger, so much so that one could've tasted it in the air. She felt so… cheated, so betrayed, but how could that be? It wasn't as if she'd ever wanted the pigtailed idiot's affection in the first place. So why was she feeling as though her heart had been chopped up into a thousand microscopic pieces?
'To hell with it', She thought angrily. If Ranma wanted to practice his perverted ways with that Amazon, who was she to stop them? Akane swung her arm in a backhand motion and smashed the war club into the wall. Her attack effectively gained everyone's attention.
The Saotome and the Amazon both stopped their epic tongue-battling and refocused their gazes towards the furious Tendo.
"My engagement with Ranma…" Her fights clenched tight enough to break the war club's handle even further, causing small splinters to become imbedded into her hand. Akane's eyes narrowed and glared at the couple with an intensity of rage the house's inhabitants had never seen before.
"…Never happened!!!"
As Akane marched off to beat the hell out of the nearest wooden dummy, Ryouga, Kasumi and Genma gaped at the youngest Tendo's declaration. Unknown to the others, Ranma couldn't stop the small smile that graced his lips. He was also powerless to prevent grasping her hand, his fingers entwined with her own.
The Amazon in question turned towards her newly acquired husband, flashing her cutest smile. Her cheeks were blazing red as she whispered once again, "Wo ai ni (I love you)".
Maybe, just maybe, this whole 'Kiss of Death' business was the best thing that could've ever happened to him.
A/N
I've only seen the first 18 episodes of the series so I apologize if there are any massive plot errors in this.
Questions, comments, C & C, don't hesitate to leave a review, PM or email and tell me what you think.
See ya
bigbabidi