For AGENT JAZZ (aka allurement)
Pairing: BWAHAHA READ IT
Word count: 889
Prompts: musical on drugs, Star Wars
Notes: I promise I don't always write like this. Don't take it seriously, it is crack! Worse, Annie-crack. So it makes no sense.
Also, with the potential to be continued. Y/Y?
Music is not mine. I disclaim!

-x-

"We're soaring, flying. There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach," Sakura sang, her melodic voice very melodic.

Naruto was in awe. Beside him, Sasuke was similarly dumbfounded.

"I didn't know you could sing," he said, gaze smoldering. Sakura smiled prettily, gaze dropping to her hands modestly. Hinata would have been proud.

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me, Sasuke-kun. Such as…" Sakura spun suddenly, ripping off her training outfit to reveal something black, leather, and vaguely cat-suit-like. Sasuke's eyes bugged out. Naruto fell over.

Out of nowhere, a beat struck up, and Sakura started to tap her foot, tossing her head from side to side, before she opened her suddenly lip-lined mouth:

"I'm Sakuralicious (so delicious)
My body stayin' vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my witness
I put yo' boy on rock, rock
And he be lining down the block just to watch what I got."

When she was finished, arms and legs spread in an awkward pose, all of Konoha had gathered and started clapping. Lee in particular, was very enthusiastic. Indeed, a waterfall of tears was cascading down his face.

"My youthful blossom! I did not know you were so talented. And with that, he took a breath.

"I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away."

"Oh, Lee," Sakura breathed, struck by the pure, raw emotion in his voice. She wavered, lips quivering in anticipation of the bitter rejection she would have to bestow. But what could she do? Lee was not the one she wanted, she despaired, turning away to press one hand to her heart and the other to her mouth, closing her eyes against the crystalline tears threatening to fall.

She began to walk away, and all twenty villagers of Konoha looked on, feeling for the poor girl who could not love. Naruto was starting to sit up, nudging Sasuke out of his very long stupor, and they made to follow her – when a masked figure appeared!

And no, it wasn't Kakashi.

This figure was tall, with serious blue eyes and when he spoke, he spoke with a rich baritone that made the girls – i.e., Tenten, Hinata, and Ino – swoon. Sakura didn't, because she couldn't hear him when he said, "Let me go."

And also because she couldn't bear to love again.

"Wise men say only fools rush in
but I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you"

Sakura gasped, the sound catching in her throat, as she turned to face the nameless stranger with the faceless voice. She couldn't see him, but she knew that she was already in love. This was what she had been waiting for. Music that sent her nerves tingling, her heart thrumming, her blood rushing.

"Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you," she sang tentatively, voice rising and falling as she took a tentative step forward. The singing stranger did the same, the two of them moving to a tune only they could hear until they were mere feet away.

The stranger reached up to his mask, inching it down as he sang. "Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you
for I can't help falling in love with you"

when his mask was down, Sakura was struck by the familiarity of his gentle smile, serene eyes, vibrant hair. "Who are you?" she breathed.

The village of Konoha – minus Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura – gasped in unison.

"You!" Tsunade screeched. "Aren't you dead?"

But the new blond ignored her, instead staring down at Sakura so tenderly, so lovingly. He reached out a hand to cup her cheek, and she all but fell into the touch.

"I'm over my head," he hummed. And then he swooped down to catch her lips in such an electrifying kiss, she thought she might explode.

It was only when they pulled away – though reluctantly – after a seven-minute kiss that Naruto yelped, "Hey, creep! Get your hands off Sakura-chan and tell me who the hell you are!"

Sakura's heart broke further at Naruto's rejection of her love. But the stranger remained calm, turning slowly on the spot to say:

"Naruto. I am your father."

Naruto, shocked, dropped to his knees. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" he howled, believing a stranger's words.

And then a building exploded. Minato cursed, Sakura screamed, and ninja fled from fear.

Only Sasuke remained standing, watching Sakura, before he turned to walk into the sunset, whispering to himself, "What hurts the most, is being so close. And having so much to say…"

Except buildings were still exploding, and Sakura couldn't think about her once love right now, nor about Naruto, still sunk on the floor in the fetal position. Because she had to save the planet.

Oh, and Minato had discovered a way inside the tight black leather and—oh.

Oh.