Title: It's
Hard Knowing Your Own Strength When The Numbers Change From Week to
Week
Universe: One Piece
Theme/Topic: So Strong
It's Stupid
Rating: PG-13
Character/Pairing/s:
Zoro, Sanji, Nami, Luffy, Robin, Usopp, Franky,
Chopper
Warnings/Spoilers: Slight spoilers for post Enies
lobby, but EVERYONE IS ALREADY AHEAD OF ME ANYWAY.
Word Count:
866
Summary: Zoro, Sanji, and Luffy have all leveled-up.
Dedication: cheloya's request! This one was surprisingly
hard because ALL ONE PIECE STORIES have this theme regardless of
meaning to or not. LOL I dunno, did I make it stick out at all? And I
couldn't really think of a particularly shippy sort of situation to
put them into with this prompt that hadn't been done about six
billion times before so you get gen. Also for kotszok just 'cuz
it's been a while and STOP BEING CRAZY K?
A/N: I am so
lame it can't even be put into words. But I guess it's nice to
see if I can still write this universe after not having played in it
for a good few months. I AM FINALLY CAUGHT UP ON THE ANIME THOUGH so
hopefully there will be more to come soon.
Disclaimer: Not
mine, though I wish constantly.
Distribution: Just lemme
know.
"Everyone who has leveled up in the past few weeks has to stand over there and NOT MOVE," Nami fumed, the navigator pointing to a very forlorn corner of the ship in a very decisive manner as she did.
Usopp blinked and raised his hand. "Um, Nami…how would we know whether we've leveled up or n…OH MY GOD."
He promptly jumped into Robin's arms when he saw exactly what it was that Nami had been looking at.
"GO STAND OVER THERE!" the sniper echoed, pointing at Zoro in an accusatory fashion.
The swordsman grunted and looked down at the crushed doorknob in his hand. "Huh," he said. Brass crumbs fell from between the cracks of his fingers and fluttered like feathers onto the floorboards.
Chopper gaped. "It's squished!"
"Fuckin' hell," Franky muttered when he heard, and shoved the swordsman aside so he could assess the damage to the door. "Adjust for your own strength before you go around breaking my hard work, dumbass! Che. This is the third time today."
Zoro flexed his arm experimentally. "It's fine, I think I got it now."
"OVER THERE," Nami, Usopp, and Franky demanded.
"Zoro, over here!" Luffy cheered, and happily waved his friend over towards the corner, which he was currently sharing with an obedient Sanji. "We have our own secret base! The trick is you gotta break something to get in." The captain grinned. "I made an imprint! Twice!"
Zoro blinked. "A what?"
"He bumped into a couple of doors," Sanji explained. "They've got his face on them now."
"Huh." Zoro turned to the chef. "And what're you in for?"
"Nothing yet. He's preemptive," Nami announced, crossing her arms. "And he's definitely NOT getting out until he proves that he's not going to break anything. Fixing this stuff is expensive, you know!"
"Nami-swan is so wise!" Sanji crowed back. "I'll go or stay wherever you want me to, my love!"
Well that just figured. Zoro sighed and decided to ignore the idiot cook because that never failed to be a good idea. So he settled down cross-legged on the deck instead, watching as Nami added up all the amounts the three of them were going to need to pay her once everything they'd broken was fixed again. The swordsman scoffed. At this rate, he'd probably owe her money all the way into his next life.
"She's very efficient, ne?" Robin began coolly as she sidled towards the isolated threesome, looking horribly amused at the lot of them as they sat like disobedient children in their designated corner of the new ship.
"Tch. She just doesn't understand that getting stronger as fast as we have makes it hard for our bodies to adjust to the difference right away," the swordsman grunted, and might have been a bit grumpier than usual on the matter because he'd been planning to work out all day today. "Damned devil-woman, locking us up on our own ship."
"Maa, I wouldn't say that she doesn't understand completely," Robin told him, eyes laughing. "I explained to Navigator-san exactly what it is you three are going through, and this is the fairest solution she could come up with in the meantime."
Zoro grunted. "Making us sit in the corner all day is a compromise? Still seems unfair if you ask me."
Robin's smile only broadened. "Well, originally she was just going to throw you all overboard."
Sanji flailed at the news. "Nami-swan and Robin-chwan are so kind!"
Zoro sighed. "Would you just shut up and think about that for a second, aho-chef?"
Sanji turned towards him and glared, from giddy to growling in less than a single second. "Who're you telling to shut up, stupid marimo? You should be grateful Nami-swan hasn't already thrown your useless ass overboard by now!"
"Tch. Well at least I wouldn't be dumb enough to jump overboard myself if only she asked me to."
"You don't even need to ask. I'll throw you overboard right now."
"Try it."
"Don't mind if I do."
Sanji kicked first.
Zoro punched second.
Both managed to dodge, but the force of the kick ended up tearing a hole in the sail while the power behind Zoro's punch cracked one of the banisters behind Sanji, fifty feet off.
Nami fumed as bits of boat fell into the ocean below. "I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO MOVE."
The two combatants pointed at each other. "He started it!"
Then, Sanji added, "But I apologize for both of us, Nami-swan!"
She slapped a hand to her forehead. "I knew this wasn't going to work." Pause, deep breath, count backwards from ten. "ALRIGHT, ALL OF YOU. OVER THERE. NOW."
Luffy blinked at the new location that she was pointing to. Frowned. "But Nami, there's no more ship over there."
She smiled. "Exactly."
Five minutes later, Zoro, Sanji, and Luffy all found themselves squished together on a small lifeboat, towed behind the Sunny by a nice, safe distance of two hundred feet.
The boat bobbed pathetically in the waves.
"Wooo this is the coolest secret base ever!" Luffy declared, and punched another sea-king-that-was-trying-to-eat-them in the nose.
The other two watched him detachedly.
They glared at each other. "This is your fault."
END