Chapter Twenty-
Edward was on top of me with his hands covering my ears but that didn't draw out the screaming coming from Celia. I tried to lift my head to look but could only see a burst of fire. I was overwhelmed with emotions.
Was Celia, a girl I considered my daughter, my betrayer, alive or dead?
"Let me go!" I shouted at Edward.
I pushed him off, which I knew was only easy because he wasn't holding me down with any force. When I was sitting up I saw ashes on the floor and felt my stomach twist into knots.
Michael's face was full of shock while Dillon and Jack were looking regretful.
Surprisingly, Edward let me run over to Michael to comfort him. But oddly enough, Michael comforted me as tears spilled from my eyes.
"It's my fault…"
He tightened his hug, "Don't think that. She betrayed us all and that's not our fault."
I closed my eyes remembering the first time I had seen her as a little girl. Her pink room filled with books and her little bed that Emmett and I sat on to read to her as she fell asleep…
"Let's go home," Michael whispered to me.
I opened my eyes and looked towards Edward who was standing beside Dillon and Jack. Slowly, I met each pair of eyes and returned to my son's knowing what I was doing.
I kissed his cheek and hugged him as tight as I could while I whispered, "It's the only way…"
Michael tensed. "Don't do this Mom… You don't need to be the hero. Those men can be free any time they want."
I pulled back a bit, "But will you?" I shook my head trying to be strong. "For once do what your mother says. Go home to your father. Explain what happened. Tell Jacob I'm happy he's got his daughter. Tell him the treaty will remain in tact." I sighed, "Tell them all I will miss them…" My throat felt like it was closing as I whispered, "Tell Emmett that I'm sorry but I guess he was right about being a whore and running off." Tears once again returned but I swatted them away quickly. "I will always love your father and you…" I bit my tongue to stop tears. "My son, I don't think I'll ever see you again." That sickening thought made me push away from him, a clean cut.
What could a mother say to her son… a final farewell that said what? "I may not have said it enough so maybe this final time will really mean something to you Michael, but I love you."
I focused on his face memorizing him. Memorizing his perfect features. I could see his father there too, and I quickly turned away from my past, realizing that this was my future.
"Release him," I softly spoke.
Jack and Dillon stared at me like I was crazy which just made it only harder. Maybe I was crazy after all…
"Jack," I paused searching for the words. "Go visit her… go visit your daughter Jane."
I closed my eyes and thought to Edward, This is the deal remember? Jack and Dillon and my son go free.
Edward nodded where he stood directly behind his two elements.
"Dillon you should go with him… The Volturi will be interested in two elements."
Dillon nodded, "Possibly…" he turned to Edward, "Do I need to blindfold the kid?"
Edward thought for a minute but shook his head, "No, we will be leaving presently so it doesn't matter."
Dillon walked over towards Michael and grabbed his arm, "Let's go."
"Mom!" Michael shouted.
I cautiously looked at him.
"I promise I will find you. I swear it!"
I closed my eyes, "Forget me Michael…"
"You once said nothing is forgotten, just misplaced… That's what you are, misplaced until we find you."
And when I opened my eyes, Michael and Dillon were gone but Jack was standing in front of me. He grabbed both of my elbows fiercely, "Do you know what you are doing?"
His eyes were mixed between angry and sad. I calmly replied, "Giving your daughter back."
He relaxed his grip at the thought of Jane. "Are you sure this is what you want?"
I could picture Michael and the remaining Cullen's in their home as a family; arguments here and there, but Jasper, Carlisle and Esme always settling matters.
"More then anything," I said but knew not to say more because my voice would betray me.
"Send Aro my regards for me, alright? And… and tell Caius that I'm sorry about his daughter. Tell him it was my fault… I don't want him to know about her plans."
"Bella-"
"No Jack… please."
"Aro will read my thoughts…"
"Let him because you can't stop that from happening… but let Aro be the judge of telling Caius."
Edward came from behind me, "We must be going. In less then an hour this place will be crawling with werewolves and other vampires."
Jack brought me into a hug and started to leave the room but as he reached the door I said, "Jack?"
He stopped.
"Spend every chance you can with your daughter… time's always short."
He nodded and left.
It starts with
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme
To explain due time
All I know
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down till the end of the day
Clock ticks life away
Its so unreal
You didn't look out below,
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on
Didn't even know, I wasted it all
Just to watch you go
I kept everything inside
And even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it's meant to be
Will eventually,
Be a memory, of a time
I stared after him for minutes until Edward stepped into view.
When I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
I had to fall, to loose it all
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme
To remind myself
It's funny that when I ran away from my past twenty years ago that it came crashing back to me. But this time with more force then I had ever imagined possible. This time, with a force that I was left with only one option… for the safety of my family I would do anything including being with Edward.
How I tried so hard
Despite the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised it got so far
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
Would I do everything again, I wondered as Edward took my hand and led me to my new life… I would because even though I don't have my happy ending anymore, everyone else will and that's all that matters. The one thing a sister, a mother, a wife, a daughter, and a friend wants for the people she knows, is happiness.
You kept everything inside
And even though I tried it all fell apart
What it meant to be, will
Eventually, be a memory of a time
When I tried so hard,
And got so far,
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
I had to fall, to loose it all
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far, as I can go
For all this
There's only one thing you should know
What shocks me the most, is that even Edward received his happy ending with me being right beside him. Maybe twenty years back I should have forgiven him… maybe two months ago I should have too… but we can't live our lives with maybe's and most certainly with what if's.
I've put my trust, in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There's only one thing you should know
I tried so hard,
And got so far,
But in the end, it doesn't even matter
I had to fall, to lose it all,
But in the end, it doesn't even matter.
My life was chosen for me. And maybe my family would come rescue me.. what if they did? Would Edward try again or would he just dwell in the shadows? Who can say for sure? But one thing I do know is that I have loved once and continue to love that person for the rest of my life. No matter how long or short that is, I will love Emmett Cullen.
Just knowing that I found love, is enough for forever because some people never even have that and for that reason, I'm willing to live out my sentence at being with Edward until his heart is content because he may love me, but he will never receive the love I have for another.
And so it ends... Thanks to all of my readers and reviewers. Without you I wouldn't have made it this far in writing this. I hope you have enjoyed Everything Changed and it's sequal, Self Sacrifice. As of now, I am planning on writing another story, but in a month or so. Hopefully I can have as much support with that as I did with this. Thanks again, Also, the song in this chapter is In The End by Linkin Park. Hope you enjoyed!
Christy//DivineRosey