A/N: This is a pure piece of fictional funniness and is not meant to be taken seriously in any way. I will warn you that this was done under a lack of sleep, early in the morning and excess amount of caffeine as well as other beverages. As always, R&R please, just to tell me how stupid it is if you like. I don't own anything FFVII and blame boredom for the production of this story. Enjoy.

Tea for Two

By MakoRain

"I'm telling you, she was checking you out."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Strife's right, man. That red head was totally looking you over in a serious way."

Vincent waved off the other two men's comments, preferring to stay in his albeit single existence. It made things easier with fewer complications such that these two had before him. They were tied down and he didn't want that…did he?

"Will you three stop gossiping like a bunch of pansies?! Yer worse than women."

Cid waved over at the three to shut up and they did, for all of about a minute before Zack opened his trap again.

"You would not believe some positions she can-"

"I don't want to know, Zack."

"Oh come on, Cloud, it's not like you and Tifa don't-"

"That is none of your business. Can we just have lunch and go already?"

"I agree."

Vincent put in his two cents before the other two went back to their mild bickering, which he gladly chose to ignore, instead spacing out at the wall across the way. It just so happened that across the room was the same red head Cloud and Zack had suggested was watching him intently before. Indeed, the woman's emerald eyes looked up from her menu to him and quickly back down, her cheeks blushing when she saw that he noticed this. His lips twitched in a smile. He never entertained the ideas of finding someone, but it was nice to be noticed every now and then.

Cid's booming steps were felt before his voice hit the three with the force of the pissed off pilot, forced to serve in Tifa's absence per her request.

"Shut up and drink yer goddamn tea!"

The cups rattled on their saucers with the force of the serving tray hitting the hard wood table. Thankfully, Zack's reflexes were as good as ever and he was able to catch the teapot while Vincent and Cloud settled the cups to not spill their contents all over the place.

Vincent watched as his two companions spooned sugar and poured cream into their tea and blinked, unable to form words to describe the scene before him. Here were these two ex-SOLDIERS, buffed out in their old uniforms and buster swords strapped to their backs, lifting dainty china tea cups to their lips. Cloud even kept his pinky out and everything. If Vincent had a sense of humor to show, he would have probably laughed out loud. As it was, he crossed his arms over his chest, sat back, and enjoyed the show.

Footfalls were heard a few feet away and Vincent didn't feel the need to look up, the man's cologne announcing his presence.

"Yo, how goes the heroes' tea party?"

Reno smirked in that annoying way he always did when he thought he was right, even if he was furthest away from the truth.

"Hey Rude, isn't it odd that all of these so called heroes were working with the bad guys at one point in time?"

Rude only stood silent by his partner, not feeling the need to respond.

"Reno." Cloud said in a low yet calm voice, hinting his disapproval at seeing the red head there.

Taking no heed to Cloud's tone, Reno continued.

"Look, here's Zack Fair, SOLDIER First Class extraordinaire, or should I say ex SOLDIER, sipping tea with his buddy who almost made it to SOLDIER and then there's the reject wannabe vampire who started out as a once proud Turk."

"Reno, just turn around and walk away." Zack was joking but there was a hint of an edge under the laughter, something Reno really should have listened to but of course, ignored. Rude even had the decency to nudge his hot headed partner to the point of knocking him over, getting a shove in return.

"This has got to be the saddest bunch of heroes to ever sit together. But seeing that we Turks helped with saving the world last time, why don't we join you?"

Reno accompanied these last lines by slinging his arms across Cloud's and Vincent's shoulders, bringing them much closer together to make it uncomfortable. Hadn't this guy ever heard of personal space?

"I'd let go now if I were you." Vincent said in his deep, smooth voice, never hiding the hate he had for the past this man represented under the organization he had once had the misfortune to work for.

"Ah, come on, buddy. We're friends, aren't we?"

The red head Turk squeezed his arms tighter together, bringing Vincent and Cloud almost cheek to cheek with Reno and there was dead silence in the rather empty Seventh Heaven since lunch was not the greatest time to be in a bar unless you preferred starting your drinking sessions early.

The whole table and area surrounding it radiated tension, anger and frayed nerves when Cid looked up and did something smart before someone else did something stupid. He couldn't have anything broken on his watch, Tifa would kill him.

"If I were you, I'd shut the hell up and walk away, tomato head. One of them could kick your ass but all three, damn, you're as good as dead."

Reno blinked a few times at the blond pilot, actually thinking things through for once. To prove Cid's words true, Zack sat up and leaned over the table, both hands on the surface. Just when he was in front of Reno's face and in a very uncomfortable position, he snarled like a dog and the red head flinched, earning a round of laughs from the table and even a chuckle from Rude, who did seem to have a personality after all.

With an uneasy chuckle, Reno removed his arms from Cloud and Vincent's shoulders and walked toward the door where his partner was waiting.

"Until next time then, spikeys…and blood sucker."

The three ignored the Turks departure and turned back to their tea, laughing about the whole situation. Well, Cloud and Zack laughed, Vincent grinned which was as much of a joyful facial expression as you could get out of the moody man. He even looked back to where the woman still sat across the room, auburn hair wavy with the movement of her head and her eyes shining in laughter at the afternoon's entertainment. At least he made someone's day.

Cid, however, was not laughing.

"Shut the hell up and drink yer tea goddamn it. Drink cold tea if you want cus I am not heating it up again, idiots."

The three quieted down and heard Cid's grumbling about 'not getting paid enough for this bull shit' while smiling the whole time.

All in all, it was a good afternoon.

The End.