WARNING: This series contains extreme anguish. The subject of which I was a little nervous about giving away but you'll most likely figure it out immediately anyhow. If you are offended by acts of sexual violence then this is not a story you will want to read. Keeping in mind however that there is no actual description of such an act being committed, only mention of it. In the unlikely event that changes in later chapters then I will give you warning.  Please do not flame me if you don't like the subject matter of this story. You've been warned.

STORY NOTE: This series takes place in the year 2004. Abby and Luka are married.  Abby is still a nurse in the ER.

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B e t w e e n   T h e   S h a d o w s

B y   A b i l e n e   K e e g a n

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Chapter One

Darkness Descending

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THE DARKNESS was everywhere now. An unfathomable emptiness. A void. Something nobody could live with, but had no choice to live without. He could remember such darkness from a time before. From a life before. A life that had been filled with the happiness of three people he loved. Yet filled with the sadness of a war he would never forget. A war that would take away his happiness, leaving him to fend for himself in a world where misery was his only companion. His only friend.

That life had left him a long time ago. And somehow he'd caught up with an old friend. Happiness. He'd thought back then that he would never know true happiness again. For the past four years he'd thought that he would never know misery again. He'd been wrong both times.

Nobody had seen it coming. Nobody could have guessed that it'd be her. A call had come in over the radio. A woman had been attacked just down the road from the hospital. The ambulance was bringing her in. They'd be there shortly. How could they have known? How could he have known? It had been only an hour ago that his wife had departed the hospital and headed home. Telling him she wasn't feeling good and was going to leave early. It was late but he'd let her go. Alone. She said she'd take the El home. She said she'd be okay. He should never have let her go.

When the ambulance pulled up Luka had been there to greet them, a nurse by his side. Kerry had been outside as well getting some fresh air. Looking back at it Luka knew how lucky it was that she had been there. They'd rushed over to the ambulance just as the doors were swinging open. Two paramedics stepped out dragging a gurney with them. They were saying something, Luka was sure it had to do with the status of the patient. But he wasn't hearing them. Because she wasn't a patient. She was his wife.

"Abby." He wasn't sure who'd made the confirmation out loud. Him or the nurse. All he knew was at that same moment his world came crashing down around him. He heard the paramedics yelling something. Something about a BP? He wasn't sure. Their voices were there but their words had no meaning.

"Luka!" His name came through loud and clear. He looked over at the nurse. What was her name? He couldn't remember it and oddly enough that seemed to irritate him. He was in a state of shock. She was saying something else but he didn't know what. He just stared at her blankly. She turned away from him and he heard her calling for Dr. Weaver. Next thing he knew Kerry was standing beside them pushing Luka out of the way. He stumbled backwards watching as they took his wife into the hospital... and away from him.

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May 06, 2004

1:00 am

Luka sat in the lounge waiting for his heart to stop beating. He was sure it would. They'd insisted he stay away from the trauma room Abby had been brought into. He knew something was terribly wrong. He knew she was terribly hurt. That she was dying. It wasn't just the fact that they had gone so far as to sit a security guard outside her door to keep him away, as it was a deep feeling he had. The feeling of a husband that knew, through an intense bond he shared with his wife, that she was going to die. Or that she was dead.

Luka jumped up from his seat when he heard the door open. Kerry walked in holding a chart in her hands. Luka gave her no time to speak. He spoke first. He had to know. Was Abby still alive?

"How is she?" He rushed strait to the question. Kerry looked at him sadly and he felt his heart drop. God. No. He couldn't lose her. He couldn't lose another wife. Why had he let her go? Why hadn't he insisted on taking her home?

"She's alive." Luka's heart rose but only slightly.

"What happened?" His burning question finally came out. Who had done this to his wife? Who'd hurt her? Why would somebody have even wanted to hurt her? Abby had never been anything but kind to others. Why would somebody attack her?

"I don't have time to explain everything right now Luka. We do have to discuss something though." Luka looked at her intently, telling her to go on. "Luka I don't know if you're aware or not but Abby is pregnant." He looked at her dumbfounded, he had had no idea. He stepped back and sank down on the couch behind him. Kerry sat next to him and continued explaining things gently.

"We don't know how far along she is. Probably not very far. Whoever attacked her stabbed her in the abdomen." Luka shut his eyes tightly against her words. He didn't want to hear them. Didn't want to believe them. "He missed the fetus but unfortunately Abby has internal bleeding and we need to operate." Luka opened his eyes and looked over at her. He knew what was coming next.

"But you'll have to take the baby in order to do that." Kerry nodded her head confirming his assumption was correct.

"The fetus would never survive the operation. The knife missed it but not by much. We want to perform a normal abortion before we send her up for surgery." Luka felt a few tears fall from his eyes. He couldn't believe this was happening.

"So what's there do discuss?" He looked at her numbly. It wasn't everyday you knew your child was about to be taken out of the world before it was even truly in the world. Kerry seemed very hesitant to answer him. She sighed deeply before finally responding.

"There is a slight chance, a very slight chance, that they both can survive the operation. But Luka," She looked him in the eyes shaking her head. "The chance is so small."

"But if there's a chance..." Luka's words trailed off. He suddenly got a very bad feeling about this.

"By taking that chance and allowing the surgery while Abby is still pregnant, you could be further endangering her life." His bad feeling hadn't come without its reasons. He looked away from Kerry and down at his hands. A silent tear falling down his cheek. How was he supposed to make this decision? Was there even a decision to make? "We don't have much time."

Luka stood up and walked over to the window. He realized quickly that there was nothing to see. Only darkness. A perfect likeness to his soul. He closed his eyes. More darkness. Suddenly an image of his wife flashed through his memory. Not Abby but another wife. One from another life. A time long ago. He saw her lying on the floor of what was left of their apartment. She was bleeding. She was dying. Should he leave her there and continue trying to save his daughter? Or should he pick her up and save her? Luka shook his head, the memory vanishing.

"Take the baby." He turned back to Kerry his face filled with anguish. "Just don't let my wife die." Kerry nodded her head and stood up. Walking over to Luka she handed him the chart.

"You have to sign this." Luka signed with only slight hesitation. He was signing away the life of his child. Allowing them to kill it. But he had to save his wife.

"How is she? Can I see her?" Kerry's look answered his question.

"I'm sorry Luka. Things are still touch and go. We really have to hurry with her." His expression must have changed her mind. She sighed. "I'll get you before they take her up to surgery." Luka nodded in agreement and turned back to the window. To the darkness.

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1:23 am

Luka was standing in the hallway just outside the trauma room when Abby's gurney was wheeled out. He didn't miss the security guard eyeing him as he rushed over to her side. She had slight bruising on her face but not as bad as he'd expected. She almost looked like she was just sleeping. He wished that were true. The IV bags and portable monitors attached to her confirmed otherwise. He saw that her arms had bruising on them as well. He was certain some of those bruises had the outline of a person's hand. Like she'd been held down. He tried to ignore what the reason for that might be. He looked back up at her sweet face.

"Abby?" He whispered her name. Her eyes remained closed and he looked up at Kerry. "Has she regained consciousness?" Kerry shook her head and his heart nearly stopped at the realization of what that could mean.

"She had some head trauma. CT shows negative though. No bleeding or even apparent bruising. I think she'll be okay but we need to get her up to surgery now." Luka didn't want to leave her side but he knew he had no choice. He leaned down and kissed her on the lips lightly then whispered three meaningful words to her.

"I love you." A part of him knew she would hear him. That no matter what happened she'd always have those words. Reluctantly, and with the assistance of Kerry pulling at him, Luka stepped away from the gurney and watched as they rushed his wife down the hallway. The thought that Luka may never see her again weighed heavily on his mind. All it would take was one slight mess up. A surgeon who had been working far too long. God knows he had heard of it happening many times before in this very hospital. It could also come in the form of bleeding that just wouldn't stop. An injury more serious then they'd thought. Luka found himself still staring down the hallway minutes after they'd left his sight. She had to be okay. He needed her.

"Excuse me?" He looked over vaguely at the two men walking up to him. That's also when he noticed that Kerry was still standing there. "I'm detective Randy Thompson, this is my partner George Hays. Was that the woman that was just attacked?" This was the last thing Luka wanted to deal with now. He just wanted to go upstairs to the OR and wait on word about Abby's surgery.

"Yes," Kerry spoke up. "If you'll just give us a minute I need to speak with Dr. Kovac, her husband, and then you can ask your questions." The detectives looked at each other then nodded their heads.

"Yeah, sure, fine with us." Kerry placed her hand on Luka's arm lightly and led him back towards the lounge.

"How did the..." He couldn't bring himself to say it. They'd just taken his baby out of its mother's womb. It was dead with no chance of ever having a life. He and Abby would never get to meet their first child.

"It went fine Luka. Everything went normally." There was nothing normal about it. Nothing normal about a woman having an abortion forced on her without any prior knowledge of it. Nothing normal about a man having to make a decision between his wife and the child she was carrying, knowing that one of the decisions could leave him without either. This wasn't normal. This was just cruel. They approached the lounge and Kerry began walking in. Luka stopped.

"Look Kerry I just want to go upstairs and wait for them to finish. I'd like to be there when she comes out." Luka seemed to notice for the first time the true sorrow that was the mask on Kerry's face. "What is it? She is okay, right?"

"We need to talk Luka. Unless you want to hear the full extent of you're wife's injuries from those detectives waiting to speak with us." Luka nodded and followed her into the lounge. He didn't like this. He knew he didn't really want to hear what was about to be told to him. The thought was already at the back of his head but he had forced it to stay there. Not letting it surface, not for a second. He didn't want to face the true reality of what had most likely happened to Abby.

"Have a seat." Luka agreed and sat down on the couch. Kerry sat down beside him. She didn't seem to know what to say. Or how to say it. Luka just wanted this all over with.  He didn't want to hear his suspicions confirmed but he knew it had to come out eventually.  Besides they'd just taken his wife up to surgery after having aborted her pregnancy, of which he hadn't even known about. Why not throw in a little more and make things worse? Make his world all the darker. God, why had he let her go?

"For the most part the extent of Abby's physical injuries was the head trauma and the stab wound. But this being the case of her having been attacked we had to check for something else. This hasn't been confirmed yet but from the damage I observed I'd say its safe to believe that she..." Her words trailed for a moment and Luka shut his eyes tightly trying to stop the tears from flowing. He knew what was coming next. "Luka she was raped. There's very little doubt about that."

He had known his heart would stop beating. What he hadn't expected was for it to shatter into a million pieces. He hadn't expected for his soul to grow cold. He wanted to leave. He wanted to hunt down the bastard who'd done this and kill him. He knew he could. He was more then capable, he'd proven that once before. He'd smashed a man's brains in while protecting Abby from an assailant that had barley touched her. He wondered what he'd do to an assailant that had violated her in the worst of all possible ways.

"We'll perform the rape kit after her surgery." Her voice was gentle but it gave no comfort. Luka had cold revenge running around in his head. "Luka, we're going to need to know the last time you and Abby..." She trailed off. Luka knew the question.

"This morning." He whispered the answer and Kerry nodded. His heart suddenly grew a little lighter, the coldness abating just slightly. He remembered this morning. It seemed so far away, yet so close. She'd been safe. In his arms as he made love to her gently, passionately. Not at all like the man that had raped her. He had taken her out of mere lust. But she hadn't been his to take.

"Dr. Weaver," Luka didn't bother to look up as he heard the door open. It was Randi, he knew her voice well enough. "Those detectives are looking for you and Dr. Kovac. I think they're getting a little antsy."

"Okay, thanks Randi." He heard the door shut and then felt Kerry lay her hand gently on his shoulder. "I'll try and distract them as long as I can. Why don't you go up and see what you can find out about the surgery? I'm sure they've started by now." Luka nodded his head but made no attempt to move. "She'll be okay Luka. She'll get through this. You both will." With that Kerry stood up and left.

Luka faced his head towards the window. Staring out at the darkness. He felt as it slowly crept into his soul, making him a part of it. He could feel himself growing completely numb. Just as he'd grown numb all those years earlier when his family had died. But this time he'd have to do something about it. Because Abby was still alive. And she needed him. He had to feel so that he could help her through this. Kerry was right, they'd get through it. They'd do it together. Somehow. But for now Luka let the darkness descend over his entire being. It was his only comfort. His only escape.

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THE END of Chapter 1

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Originally I had hoped to post at least one chapter for this story every week, since I already have the first chapters written.  I am going to try and stick to that but am not sure how likely it is.  It might end up being every two weeks.  I had hoped to have more chapters done before posting but I've had this story sitting around now for so long that I just finally had to submit it!  Anyhow, as long as you continue to review I will continue to write.

END NOTE: Okay, all the medical stuff in this story was totally written by whim. It sounded good and was necessary for the story to unfold as I wanted it to unfold. I am not a doctor and claim no knowledge of medicine whatsoever. Whether or not any of this could actually occur in real life is a mystery to me. But like I said it sounded good. :) Please do not flame me for medical and procedure inaccuracies. Whether they are in this chapter or future chapters.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS: Thanks! to track three on the album "The Visit" by Loreena McKennitt for the title of this story.  I tried forever to come up with a suitable title till one day I sat down to write and put "The Visit" into my CD player.  When that familiar instrumental song began to play I finally had my title!  As I thought about it more there really couldn't be a more suitable name for this all then "Between the Shadows".  I only hope my reader understands it as much as I do.

DISCLAIMER: The above was a story of fiction based on characters created and owned by Michael Crichton and NBC.