A/N: "My God, someone stop me, I started another story! Anyway so background on this, supposedly when I was camping with Strata we got to talking about weird crossovers and this one came out, but only as a fleeting thought, about a week and a half later I wrote this without even remembering that I had mentioned this crossover before, it wasn't until I told Strata about it she reminded me.

Anyway, this will be more focused on humor, or as much as I can get of it. Some of the jokes will be cliche, stupid, or just leave you thinking, "What the fuck?" but that's usually how my mind works when I try to get something humorous out.

I honestly don't know how long this will last, considering I promised myself that I WILL finish Wingz Corp.

I haven't decided if there will be any pairings in this, if there are it will only be very light, doesn't matter if its m/m or m/f. Suggestions always help. But to be safe I will rate this T, probably because of later language...

So here's your Gundam Wing crossover with ?."


Roses, Guns, and Boys

Chapter 1: Maxwell House Coffee

The screen flickered alive in the dark room, sounding out a faint repetitive beep. A teenager was sitting in front of the computer in the matter of seconds, eyes quickly scanning through the parameters of the next mission.

Another teenager appeared at his shoulder. "Ne, Hee-chan, what is it?" He asked as he wiped the sleep from his eyes. "A new mission already?" The two had just returned from their previous mission two hours ago; a mission that had lasted over 48 hours of nothing but reconnaissance and a stakeout of an OZ base. Trowa and Wufei were taking care of the other half of that mission as the two stared at the computer screen. "So, what're we up to this time?"

Heero read through the orders a fourth time making sure he hadn't missed any underlying code or hidden message and just to make sure that he had actually read it correctly. "Dr. J has lost his mind." He mumbled.

"Well, what?"

"We're being sent to a school to monitor the children of high ranking OZ officers and companies that have a direct connection with the war." Heero was definitely not pleased with this new mission, but it wasn't him to complain or just decline, he would go through with it to the best of his abilities. Failure was not an option. "Duo, secure the safe house. We're going to be leaving the Gundams behind this time."

"What about the others?" Duo asked. No trace of exhaustion or sleepiness could be seen on him once he heard the explanation of the new order.

"They will be joining us as soon as they finish their missions and secure their Gundams." Heero closed his laptop with a click. "Damn…"

"Man, this might be harder than you think." Duo groaned. He straightened and pointed an accusing finger at Heero. "You suck at blending in with a group your own age of normal non-Perfect Soldier types." He shrugged with his hands up and shook his head helplessly, causing his meter long braid to flick back and forth. "I trust that Dr. J has already sent in transcripts with our identities and such."

"We should be receiving copies of those records as soon as we're on a plane back to Japan." Heero answered.

"Just how long is this mission supposed to last?" Duo asked. "I mean we're supposed to be fightin' for the colonies and the Mad Five has us scurrying around and going to school to spy on kids!"

"Many of these civilians are associated with companies that are dealing in the manufacturing of Mobile Suits and other weaponry. I guessing that Dr. J and the others want us to get close to these kids so get a better idea of what dealings their parents are up to. It shouldn't be too hard since a lot of these students are direct heirs to the companies."

"Yeah, the only hard part will be blending in when all you've known is a soldier's life." Duo scoffed crossing his arms over his chest. "So what school are we talking about here?"

Heero actually let out a sigh. "I'll brief you on the plane."

"God…" Duo ran a hand through his unruly bangs. "That plane's leaving soon isn't it?" He didn't wait for Heero to reply. "Guess I should get packing if I want to get my toys passed security. What a drag," he mumbled to himself, "just got back from a 48 hour mission, barely got an hour of sleep, and here they send us to another mission, where we're to be stuck on a public plane for God only knows how many hours from London back to Japan, but I probably can't sleep during that time since most of it will be spent be briefed and trying to establish a persona to slip into all the while teaching Hee-chan how to act like a normal teenager…" His rambling continued even as he handled the explosives and his trusty High-Powered Browning, packing them carefully into his duffel bag.

Heero was once again inwardly surprised at how long Duo can ramble without breathing as he did his own packing.


"What the hell!" Duo yelled causing a quite a few of those around him to stare. He winced when Heero's elbow discreetly connected with his side. "Sorry." He said to those around him putting on the sweet, innocent teenager mask. Turning back to Heero, he glowered. "What do you mean I'm supposed to be the son of the Maxwell House Coffee Corporation's chief executive?"

"Exactly what I mean." Heero answered. "Apparently Dr. J found it amusing and since it's more of an American company no one will be able to see that the identity is a fake. Plus, this way Wufei will still be able to yell at you when you provoke him without worrying too much about slipping up."

Duo huffed and assumed a defiant position as he continued to read through the rest of his identity. 'Reason for attending is to make friends with the children of other companies to expand the coffee trade to Japan as a part of training for taking over the job as chief executive.' Hm… shouldn't be too hard. I'll actually have an excuse as to why I act hyper all the time! I can just blame it on the coffee and annoy the hell out of Wufei even more. Wait a second… Duo turned to Heero with a questioning gaze. "Do you know what the others' stories are?"

Heero nodded. "Quatre can just go as himself since none know him as a Gundam pilot. Wufei will also be going under his own name since he is the heir to the Dragon Clan of L5. Trowa will be keeping his regular codename and entering the school as a special scholar student, he will be acting as a scholar student from the L3 colony. I'll be the son of a dead engineer who came up with the design of the Aries Mobile Suit, who has come back home to earth from the colonies to be with family and to go to school."

"Won't we be arriving late? So we'll be missing the opening ceremonies and such, what's our cover for that?" Duo inquired as he looked over the parameters again, studying some of the pictures of students that Dr. J provided as potential targets.

"Yours is that you were taking care of last minute agreements with union workers that couldn't wait."

"And?" Duo pressed.

"I was tending the funeral of my late mother and moved in with my uncle who is conveniently never at home due to his job as a archeologist."

"That's almost too convenient. In fact, I think it's borderline suspicious if anyone looked to closely." Duo remarked.

"It's an elite school. The students won't bother with those of a lower class. It's almost stupid at how naïve they are."

"Let's just hope that they're naïve enough to ignore your little soldier quirks." Duo leaned back in his chair; having already read through the parameters twice, and analyzed the map of the school with all possible escape routes until he had it memorized, and studied the provided students a few times. He gave the data back to Heero who placed it in a portfolio, which would be either burned or shredded at the earliest moment and stuffed it into his carry on bag. Looking at it, the guards would just regard it as some type of homework or related research.

Heero shut his eyes as he folded his arms over his broad chest, his head tilted back slightly against the headrest of the chair. He fell into a light sleep, where he was still mostly aware of what was going on around him, but it was enough to rest him up for the upcoming mission.

Duo watched as his only source of some amusement went to sleep. He knew that Heero could sense what he was doing and he knew that Heero would probably kill him if he tried to pull a prank. Sighing, Duo rested his cheek on his fist, leaning on the armrest to watch the other people on the aircraft. He noted the small details about them, a nervous habit, an annoyed gesture, or something that might give them away as OZ spies or off duty soldiers. The funny thing was, he had already located six.


"This can't be right." Wufei growled. "It's an injustice, the five of us in the same school? It's a disaster waiting to happen."

Trowa watched the Chinese pilot as he grumbled, all the while remaining impassive. He turned to look at Quatre to his left when he spoke up.

"It's obvious that Dr. J and the others want us to infiltrate and try to get as much information as we can about the militaristic dealings and transactions. It might give us an idea what OZ might be up to and what kind of new weapons we can expect them have when we go up against them again."

"The women there will probably be insufferable." Wufei mumbled.

"Try not to offend any of the ladies while we're there, Wufei." Quatre warned lightly. "Since you're going under your title as heir to the Dragon Clan it might bring shame to your clan and also the ladies might be daughters of some of the food providers and transportation to the L5 colony. Imagine if they managed to get their parents to boycott-"

"Enough already!" Wufei exhaled sharply through his nose. "I get it already."

"We should get moving." Trowa spoke up. "We'll have to rendezvous Heero and Duo before heading to the school."

"Right." Quatre nodded and stood up. "Well, shall we get going?"


The five made the rendezvous at the house where Heero's supposed uncle was supposed to be living. It was nothing but a rundown old apartment that looked like it hadn't been used in a least five years. At least it was close to a small market. There were two bedrooms, a bathroom, living room and kitchen. The kitchen and living room were practically one room, separated only by a counter and some cabinets.

Heero was not going to go anywhere until he had the place completely secured. Micro cameras directed at every possible entrance, locks and back-up locks that required certain codes, every crack and hole covered, computers set up that had safety locks for their safety locks, and anything else Heero thought of while his brain went into paranoid soldier mode. He made the second bedroom the computer room, setting up his laptop and running system checks on all programs and even checking up on OZ.

Trowa helped Heero set up his security, the tall brunette commenting where he, as an infiltrator, might find a weakness in the system.

Wufei was checking the cupboards, seeing if the previous owner had left anything of use or anything that might suggest there was some sort of infestation. He did find some utensils that were in good shape, just needed a good washing a disinfesting, a couple of plastic cups, a few bowls of various sizes, which only two had matching lids, and a couple of decent plates.

Duo and Quatre were working on removing the plastic covering from the furniture. The covering had done its job quite well; the couch and chair were almost completely dust-free. The small coffee table had seen better days with its scratches, small indents, a leg that looked like it had been glued back on numerous times, and a drawer which wouldn't close all the way.

While the two were making the house a little more livable, Quatre was explaining to Duo some of the etiquette that might be expected of him while they were at the school.

"They might let some things slide due to your American mannerism," Quatre explained. "But you might want to be careful with your habit of giving everyone nicknames. I'm sure Heero explained to you the honorifics that the Japanese use seeing as you made short work of picking that up and calling Heero 'Hee-chan'."

"It gives Heero a softer side." Duo defended himself.

"Still, I would advise against it." Quatre thought for a moment. "We all are going to have to act like we've never met before." He absently rubbed his chest above his heart. "I guess it makes me kind of sad." He gave a shrug and a small smile. "I'm being silly."

"I don't think so, Quat." Duo grinned. "Wufei, you luck out! I won't be able to search you out just for the fun of annoying you until we actually meet!"

"Looks like I'll be spending my time trying to avoid any such confrontation." Wufei answered, his voice slightly muffled by the cabinets he was currently sifting through.

"Confrontation?" Duo placed a hand to his forehead, acting faint. "You wound me with your words, Fei."

Heero and Trowa walked from the bedroom-turned-computer room. "Security has been set up." Heero announced. "It's not complete, but any normal person won't be able to get passed it, even a hacker. I'll finish it when I get back from the school this evening."

There was a scoff from behind the counter drawing the eyes of the four pilots. "It looks like Maxwell has already started his campaign of his company in this country." Wufei's head appeared and he placed three large tins of the Maxwell House coffee on the counter; two of them had yet to be opened. "And you have your own coffee maker as well." He placed the machine next to the tins.

Quatre covered his mouth with his hand to hide the growing smile.

Heero gave his head a small shake before turning to take his leave. He gave a curt farewell and walked out the door to the rental car they had for a few days until Duo's Sweeper friends come in a drop off their own vehicle that they had already paid half of. He climbed into the cheap American made Cavalier and followed the map he had memorized to the school.

The five had agreed to come to the school at different times to avoid suspicion, and since the school had only started the week before, they wouldn't miss much. Heero would be the one who would arrive first since his transcript made clear that he was already in around the area. Duo would follow him the day after tomorrow, then next week would be the arrival of Quatre, Trowa, and then Wufei due to the distance of the colonies.

Heero allowed himself to examine his surroundings more closely. The small suburb seemed to be a calm place; there were quite a few houses and apartments, with a few shops nestled around. He returned his full attention back to the road, but always wondering how this place seemed to escape the war.

After about a half-hour drive, Heero entered the grounds of the school. The campus was expanse and well cared for. A parking lot was placed just before to the entryway and the walkway led to the arch the acted as the entryway to the actual campus of the school. Past the entryway was a large pond that glittered with the light from the afternoon sun and acted as the center of the three different buildings with numerous wings each. Heero could only assume that they were the elementary school, the middle school, and the high school.

He walked to the center the building where the high school was and where he was supposed to meet with the Chairman and get his class schedule, room number, and the rundown of the school before he would no doubt get led off to his class to begin what he hoped would be the norm for the rest of the mission.

But with this particular high school he would not get what he wanted.

Welcome to Ouran High School.


A/N: "I hope I didn't make it too obvious what the school will be... I had all the DVDs of Gundam (until something happened to two of them so they are currently MIA) and I have up to volume 7 of Ouran High School Host Club and I have seen the whole anime once. I somewhat have an idea of what I'm doing, but I'm mostly pulling this out of my ass...

About the time line... Well, I have it that Haruhi broke the vase in the Host Club around the firs day of first week and now she's somewhat integrated into the Club, but I'm not sure of how many of the episodes/chapters from the manga/anime I want to incorporate in with this story. As for the Gundam Wing time line..." sighs "Well, that basically went AWOL. I can safely say its after the Edwards' base incident and before they went to space, but somehow they found the time to grow comfortable around each other and trust each other and all that shit..." slumps in chair "Yeah, Duo shot the time line and Heero trampled it with Wing.

So, suggestions will help and to tell me that I'm not completely insane for doing this crossover. (Hey I couldn't help it anyway... After hearing the Japanese voice actor of Tamaki and saying that it sounded familiar when he actually talked serious, which rarely happened, and later finding out that its the SAME Japanese voice actor of Heero)

Please tell me if there are any glaring mistakes, so I can fix them and not confuse the rest of the populace...

Yeah, thanks and please review.

Death