Chapter 6- it ends tonight

previously...

Sam scowled at his brother panting heavily "i wont let you hurt anyone else Dean..it ends tonight"

Dean screamed out at him charging towards him he felt himself being thrown to the opposite side of the room again " quit doing that" he exclaimed as he turned back round " you wont hurt me Sam im your brother, im all you've got" he widened his eyes " you really want your brother back, let it go accept Dean for who he is"

Sam held a gun to Dean widening his eyes aiming it directly at him not quite understanding what Dean was telling him " Im sorry Dean..but its ends tonight" without even thinking he pulled the trigger.

Minutes had past and Sam stared down frozen, he had killed his brother...Dean was dead.

7/11 Warehouse, Lousianna

The reality of the situation didnt hit Sam straight away, his head pounding, his heart thumping hard in his chest " Dean?" his lips quivered as he spoke " Dean?" he repeated his voice a little louder. Panic plastered over his face he felt his whole body turning into ash as he fell to floor besides Deans lifeless body, he knew that Dean didnt mean the things he had done, he was just troubled, confused and angry about theyre chosen path the hunters life.

" Dean"

He got no response, which was more than likely to happen he was dead there was nothing that was going to wake him up now...nothing..not a spark,worry taking over Sam as he rocked his brother back and forward " what have i done...oh my god..what have I done..Dean...wake up please wake up im sorry" he squinted his eyes, everything becoming blurry like he was falling into a big black hole and he was never going to stop falling, thats when it hit him, he found himself screaming Deans name in what looked like a hospital, he looked around him freaked out, unsure of what just happened.

The room was small, but spaceous enough to move " Dean?" he called out again but nothing..maybe he was dead maybe he actually had killed his brother and it wasnt a dream..what if he actually had killed him and this was the aftermath, he was found and rescued from the 7/11 and Deans body was lying in a morgue somewhere about the be cremated, he shivered at the thought of it but it was true, he had killed the one and only thing he had left in his family, the one person who regardless of his behavior,loved him.

as long as im around nothing bads going to happen to you.

He began to feel colder, a definate chill running down his spine, where the hell was everyone he thought to himself, did they not know he was concious, his thoughts were cut off when he heard his brothers voice echoing down the corridor, with another familar voice " Ellen" he smiled " so it was all just a dream..a very very bad dream". He rested his head on the pillow, suddenly getting hit by the worst, most excruiting pain in his head like one of those freaky ass visions he gets from time to time the memory of him shooting his own brother haunting him " NO...NO...no more...please no more..DEAN...im sorry"

Dean came crashing through the door " SAM?" he widened his eyes dropping his glass to the floor " OH my god your awake?" he watched his brother in awe confused at first as to what was happening to him.

"IM sorry...I didnt mean it...wake up...you cant be dead..Dean" he whimpered tossing and turning.

Dean hurried round him trying to restrain him from doing any damage to himself " shh Sammy its ok..im right here im not dead" he pull him towards him embracing him " Sam come on talk to me!"

Sam mumbled something, Dean was unable to understand it,it was all getting too much for him now " Sam...Sammy?" he called out to him slapping him in the face to try and wake him.

Sam shot up gasping and gagging for breath " Dea-" he panted heavily staring up coughing uncontrollable the pain in his lungs a little exhilerating for his body to handle " Dean...I killed..you..im-" he coughed again unable to string a single sentence together.

Dean pulled his brother into a hug " its ok Sammy I got you, im right here"

General Hopspital
a few hours later

Sam lay upright on the long metallic hospital bed the feeling of relief washing over him It was just a dream, thats all a horrible dream that made him believe his brother was a crazed lunatic kiling people.

Deans face was almost reminicent of his younger brother " so your saying I was a murderer, like for real? Like Freddy Krueger".he smirked finding it a little amusing at first until he saw the distressed look on his little brothers face.

Sam nodded.

Dean laughed awkwardly and nervously unsure of how to take it, him a murderer? There was just no way well not in reality anyways "wow ok thats just..i mean killing people for the sake of it, did I enjoy it?"

Sam nodded feeling it all coming back to him " yea you did, you took pleasure in causing others pain...especially me" he looked right into his brothers eyes a look of hate and pain in his own. "you even accused mom of abusing you as a child, saying that she was the cause o your illing spree..you were messed up Dean, more worse than the shapeshiter in St Louis"

Dean shook his head " yea but that wasnt me remember, that was just someone who stole my pretty face, anyways thats beside the point" he let out a heavy sigh " it was just dream, im not really like that and you know it"

Sam felt himself losing control of his own emotions again the barriers holding up the walls to his thoughts were slowly crashing down " Do I? I mean think about Dean you've always been a little on edge since mom and dad die-"

" I wouldnt kill anyone just for the pleasure of it Sam, only to those who are asking for it, theres a difference" he interjected " I mean im not a murderer Sam" he raised his voice a little.

Sam glared slightly at his older brother " I never said you were Dean, but in my head while I was asleep, thats all I saw, the freddy kruger version of you and I dont know Dean,you do take pleasure in killing dont deny it, ive seen what your like while we're hunting"

"oh come on you cant be serious...we're hunting its what I have to do, you know be brutal make tough painful choices, you know saving people,hunting things family business, hell you do it too, shall I go round calling you a murderer?" he shot back.

Sam again gave his brother an angry look " dont try turn this round on me Dean, please, I just dont understand why your the way you are, I mean sure when I was locked up in that insane nightmare you were off your rocker but parts of you were still there, I could see it" he paused rubbing his lips together rattling his brain trying to rememeber back. " I mean I think I did,I just dont understand you, I mean you dont open up to anything, you pretend everything is alright when it clearly is not, you put your heart and soul on the line just to protect me, well let me tell you something Dean your not god,you dont get to make those choices for me, im old enough to take care of myself" he leaned in closer wanting to continue, there was so much he wanted to tell his brother but somehow couldnt find the words to say it.

" you know what Dean...just go away...leave me alone" he turned away from his brother " I cant even look at you right now"

" Sam I-"

Sam glared up at his older brother " just go" he demanded giving his brother a threatening glare. " accept your brother for who he really is"

Dean fixed his eyes upon Sam seeing the pain and discomfort in his eyes, he had seen this look before many times when he was pissed off or upset. He laughed fakely " Fine" he retorted hurt that he was shutting him out. " i'll just leave you to your thoughts" he hesitated to leave at first but eventually forced himself to get out of there. He slammed the door after him looking up seeing Ellen " we're getting out of here...or well I am"

Ellen stared at Dean cluelessly a little confused as to why all of a sudden Dean just wanted to ditch his brother who had been in a deep coma for what 3 months or so "But Sam-" she turned back to the room before getting interuppted by Dean.

"Sam can look after himself"

Ellen stared at Dean cluelessly " you honestly think so, come on be reasonable Sam's just lost,confsued, he's just come out form a deep sleep how else do you want him to be ,he's been without his brother for so long, he just doenst know what do or say, so he pushes you away, he means nothing by it, he's adjusting back into reality"

Dean glared putting his foot down on the peddle speeding up hcaging hte subject a little " we never should've gone on that hunt, its just jacked everything up" he felt a moment of rage, he wanted to scream at the top of his lungs until the windows smashed but seemed the wrong place and wrong time, he needed to keep it together and show Ellen that he wasnt beyond breaking point "I would never of crashed the car, I wouldnt of nearly got Sam killed,Sam told me we should stay another night...but no I wouldnt listen and now look whats happened"

Ellen raised an eyebrow " is this the part where you blame yourself for what happened?".

Dean responded by just staring at her, he bit his bottom lip turning away as fast as he could " it is my fault, why else would he dream that im some pyscho killer, you know I killed Jo dont you...your one and only daughter... Sam doesnt trust me..dont think he ever will now, everytime he looks at me he's just going to see the killer in me and not the loving caring brother he's always known...one job...look out for Sammy,keep him safe" he weakly smiled throwing Ellen the keys to her car, since his was in some salvage yard.

Ellen caught the keys unlocking the door getting in not bothering to reply back.

" maybe I am just a killer"

END OF PART ONE!