Author: Furyan Goddess
Title: Because of You, inspired by the song from Kelly Clarkson and Amanda by Boston
Rating: Let's just be safe w/ NC17 for sexual content and language.
Fandom: KAG/AU
Disclaimer: Don't own Taylor or Matty or Scarpa or anyone/thing from KAG

Summary: A woman learns to love and trust through Taylor's gentle hand
Pairing: Taylor/OC
Archive: Yes
Feedback: Yes please but be easy, my first ever KAG fic
Author's Notes:

Her name is Amanda, Mandy for short, that's what they've always called her regardless if that's what she wanted or not. It didn't matter what she wanted, she didn't matter, not to anyone.

Her mother was ill, in the mental sense. She was depressed, never getting out of bed for what seemed like weeks at a time. Sometimes Mandy had to force her to bathe, to eat, she was eleven.

Amanda was left to raise her little sister, she was a good kid but Mandy wasn't a mother, not at eleven, and not at seventeen when she emancipated myself and became her legal guardian. But she shut up and did was she was told, what she thought was right, it was better than a beating when she was younger and better than leaving her sister to a life of hell, one which she had lived.

Her Father was never around much; she really doesn't remember much about him. He shortly after Lissa was born; her Mom sank into Postpartum Depression and it took a while for her to come out of it, when she did, Dad kept throwing it back up into her face, calling her useless and that she wasn't fit to be a Mom. Good things, nice things to say to the clinically depressed… so he packed up and left and guess what happened to her… you got it, right back down hill into her own world of pain and tears.

She'd pull it together for doctor's appointments or welfare appointments, made it look like she was doing a good job, but it was Mandy doing the job.

When her mother did speak to her, she always talked down to her. Mandy, you're stupid, you're lazy. You can't do anything right. Don't ever get married Mandy, men are pigs. They will leave you broken and pour and with babies to rise. You can't trust anyone but yourself Mandy.

In the eyes of her Mother, Mandy was useless, never pulling her weight and would never amount to anything but a broken down, bitter woman. Mandy knew different, she knew she would never let herself be like her Mom, she would make something out of her self, no matter what.

Every night she would hear her mother cry over her father, as far as she was concerned, he was a loser too. He just walked away from them, his kids and left them there, left her there to take care of a baby. He never sent money and never bothered to visit them, he never cared, no one did.

Mandy didn't have time for boys, hardly had time for school work. She worked, studied and took care of her sister and her mother. A lot to handle for a teenager, for anyone really. She decided at seventeen she had had enough and divorced her mother.

She was pissed and called Mandy every name in the book. Said she was a whore and that she worked the streets. She said she had lost control of Mandy when she was only eleven, that's when it started, when her beautiful daughter turned into the slut she was.

The court saw though the woman's lies because the neighbor's stood up for Mandy. They told the court how she raised Lissa, with their help, while she worked part time and went to school. The courts awarded her full custody of the girl and declared her an adult.

Later that day, she packed up her and Lissa's meager belongings and moved into a tiny, two room apartment and never looked back.

That was three years ago. Amanda was now twenty and Lizza was nine. They still lived in that tiny little apartment, sharing a bedroom. No dating, no real friends, nothing but each other.

Amanda knew it was pathetic but what was someone to do when they had a nine year old to watch after? So she worked and took classes when she could. She longed to go to school full time but it would never happen, at least not for a few years.

Amanda worked in a diner down the street, she made decent money and she could work the late breakfast and lunch shift when Lissa was at school and still try to be home for her to help with her homework and take her to dance class.

Lissa loved to dance and it was the one thing Mandy insisted on doing for her. She would find a way to pay for it so she worked twice as hard, picked up a few extra shifts and when that wasn't cutting it, she decided to get a second job at a local Italian restaurant called Scarpa's. She knew she could do the work; she had been waiting tables since she was sixteen and she was good at what she did.

A young man came out and greeted her. He was dressed in a dark suit and looked smooth and charming but there was something about him that made Mandy think he liked the ladies and she wasn't interested in him or anyone else for that matter.

"Hi, my name is Chris Scarpa, how can I help you today?"

Mandy went to shake his hand and found him kissing her knuckles instead. She resisted the urge to wipe them off on her pants but only barely. "Hello Mr. Scarpa, my name is Mandy and I'm looking for a job."

"Really, doing what?"

"Waiting tables."

"Can you read or speak Italian?" He asked her.

"No,"

"Well the menu is in Italian,"

"I can learn, I'm a fast learner. I've been waiting tables for four years now, I'm good. I could really use the job Mr. Scarpa."

"Please, call me Chris."

"Ok, Chris."

"What shift are you looking for?"

"I was thinking Tuesday and Wednesday lunch and Thursday night and maybe every other Saturday?"

"Just every other? Saturday's a big money night."

"Yes, I can only do every other one. Please, I can start tomorrow."

"Tomorrow you say? Well it just so happens I'm down a waitress tomorrow so you can give it a shot.

There's a dress code, black skirt, white shirt and tie. Your hair has to be up off your face and out of the food. No long, hideous nails and easy on the make up. We're running a restaurant not a brothel."

He began to walk and gestured her to follow him. "Pay is six bucks an hour plus tips and I'm sure you know that is a lot more than the average place pays their wait staff. After you've been here a while, and if you're good, you can get a chance to work parties and that's where the big money comes in. I don't tolerate call off's or you being late. You get one shot and that's it, after that, you're gone. Any questions?"

"Only two. What kind of shoes and what time do I start?"

He smiled at her, "Shoes, well you can wear what your comfortable in, but I've always been partial to heels myself especially with a skirt. As for the time to start how about you get here at ten thirty and we can get you ready. Deal?"

"Yes." She said shaking his hand. "Thank you so much Mr. I mean, Chris. I won't let you down."

She left Scarpa's with a new spring in her step and went to spend some of her tiny savings on new clothes for work. She cringed at the price but she knew she had to look good to earn any kind of money. She found a pair of heels that were sexy and comfortable at the same time. She may not be interested in dating but she knew men liked to look and looking got you tips.

The shoes had a pretty high heel on them compared to what she was use to wearing. She was tiny, only about five feet three inches and was one fifteen wet. She wasn't self conscious about her size, she liked being small, people tended to notice you less and the less you got noticed, the less chance you got in trouble.

-

She hardly slept that night; she was so excited about the new job. She got Lissa off to school and started to get ready for work. After she was all dressed she looked into the mirror and took a deep breath.

She pulled her red hair back and put it into a French Twist and she applied a little make up around her eyes and again wished they were blue or green instead of the dark brown she ended up with. She always thought that if you had red hair you should have the green eyes to go with it but not her, hers was so brown they were almost black.

Her mother always told her they were hard and cold and that she got her eyes from her daddy. Her mom had the blue eyes and so did Lissa.

Slipping her feet into her new heels she grabbed her keys and left.

Her heart may have been pounding and her knees just about knocking but you would never have known it. Her hands were rock steady, her face, though in her mind was plain, wore a friendly smile and she got every order right. Her tips were more than she made in two days at the diner and she was beside herself when her shift was over.

Chris told her what a good job she did and she thanked him again before slipping out the back door. She only glanced and muttered thank you at the man that held the door open for her as she hurried home.

That night she told Lissa about her new job and how if it worked out she would quit the diner and only have to work one job. She took Lissa to her dance class and could actually pay for the month instead of class to class. She felt her life was finally going to become a little bit easier.

-

"Who was that?" Taylor asked Scarpa.

"New waitress."

"Didn't know you needed another one."

"Don't but I couldn't turn her down. The eyes…"

"What about her eyes?"

"They broke my heart, sad." Taylor grunted at him. Scarpa was always falling for girls and their 'eyes'.

"How'd she do?"

"Probably the best damn waitress I got."

"Better than Candy?" Taylor asked with a grin. Everyone was better than Candy; they just kept her around cause she was fantastic to look at, like keeping art.

Taylor made a mental note to come and check her out some day, see what she was made outa'.

-

Mandy worked lunch again the next day. She was slammed and then Chris and two of his friends sat down in her section. She wanted to cry, and with her heart in her throat she went over to take their order.

"Hello Chris." She said then smiled and said hi to the other two men with him.

"Hi Mandy. This is my friend Matty and that's Taylor."

"Hello. What can I get for you today?"

"Your name tag says Amanda." Taylor said to her.

"Everyone calls me Mandy."

"Hi Mandy, it's nice to meet you." Matty said and held out a hand, "I'm Matty Demaret and that's Taylor Reese." She shook his hand and smiled. Taylor didn't offer her one of his and she was glad. He scared her. He was huge, she had never seen someone so large and muscular, and he had to weigh twice what she did, at least.

"It's nice to meet you Mr. Demaret, Mr. Reese."

"Mr. Demaret?" Matty laughed, "Please, you make me feel old. Mr. Demaret is my father, call me Matty, and he's Taylor."

Demaret, she had heard of that name before, you couldn't live in New York and not know it, but she had never heard of Reese. She had also heard of Scarpa and had a feeling she might be working for the mob but she needed the money and didn't care. That didn't mean she needed to become chummy with them so she would take their orders and keep her distance.

She took their orders and tried not to shake when she felt the weight of Taylor's eyes on her. She smiled and was polite and made a point to make eye contact with them, don't show them you're nervous, she thought.

They ate and she was clearing away their dishes and pouring coffee when Taylor spoke to her again, "Amanda," she stopped and looked at him trying hard not to spill coffee as she did so.

"Is there something else you need Taylor?"

"Why aren't you in school?" He asked her, completely confusing her.

"I graduated school."

"Why aren't you in college instead of working here?" he asked her, crossing his arms over his massive chest.

"Taylor." Matty snapped wondering what had gotten into his friend. Taylor was never one to pry.

"That's very personal Mr. Reese and I don't know you well enough to tell you." Mandy finished pouring the coffee and cleared the rest of the table and made a note to herself to stay away from Mr. Taylor Reese. He was nothing but trouble and he scared her senseless.

-

"What's wrong with you man? Why'd ya ask her something like that?" Matty hissed at Taylor when she was out of ear shot.

Taylor just shrugged his shoulders; he didn't really know why he had asked it, why it bothered him that someone her age, her size, worked so hard for a few bucks and hour.

After her shift was over, Chris told her she was doing a great job and he would see her Thursday night. She left out the back again and jumped when Taylor spoke to her again.

His deep voice rasped over her skin and she shivered, "See ya tomorrow, Amanda."

She didn't look at him just nodded and said goodbye.

She knew it was wrong and she scolded herself for it all the time, make eye contact when you talk to someone. Don't let them think you're weak, but she never could meet the eye of a man when she wasn't working; she never had the guts to. She felt so naked when she looked into peoples eyes and at lunch when her eyes met Taylor's she felt he could see right though her.

His eyes, so dark and watchful. They didn't miss anything. His voice was so deep it almost hurt to listen to but at the same time she knew it could be deadly or soothing depending on what he wanted it to be.

She was in way over her head working at Scarpa's. What was she thinking? She needed the money and that was the only reason she was staying but hoped that she could do so and keep her head above water. She didn't want to get tangled up into anything that would put Lissa at risk.

He called her Amanda, no one called her that. Though she preferred it, she never voiced her objection, what would be the point, no one listened to her. And the way he said it, he almost purred it and she felt her heart pound in alarm.