AN:: All righty people Here ya go with a small bonus. Just something ridiculous, just like the rest of this fic has been :D I'll explain the happenings at the end of this...insanity. Have fun :3 .

Disclaimer:: Mai-HiME belongs to Sunrise. Not me [sadness

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All she wanted was a sandwich, was that too much to ask?

Apparently it was.

Natsuki had meant to go to the store sooner, but she had been running short on money, not to mention that whenever she left her house it seemed Shizuru was haunting her every move.

Or rather, Natsuki was just extremely paranoid from what had happened earlier that week.

So now here she was, armed with a spoon and a fork, prepared to remove every last drop. She shoved the fork in first, scraping as much of the edges as she could coming out triumphant in pulling out most of the mayonnaise. She smothered it onto the bread, a rather difficult task with the fork. Taking the spoon she wiped off the rest of the tasty fat and wiped it on the bread. After triple checking that the fork could get no more of her beloved substance, Natsuki shoved it in her mouth savoring the flavor.

She hummed in appreciation and tipped the bottle once more, shoving the spoon inside. Or at least attempted to shove it inside. She growled and threw the spoon into the sink. She opened the drawer to where her other utensils were and pulled out another spoon. She stared at if for a few moments before testing its size. She ground her teeth in frustration when it didn't fit either. She tossed this one into the sink as well and roughly opened the drawer again. She pulled out two different sized spoons and tried them in the bottle again.

When both did not go into the bottle Natsuki threw them roughly into the sink, almost breaking the glasses in it. She sorted through the rest of her silverware and pulled out the smallest spoon she had, but left the drawer a mess, too annoyed to fix it. Natsuki walked over to the opposite counter where she had left her partially covered bread. She put the spoon in the opening of the bottle, she added a small amount of force but nothing happened.

Growing more and more frustrated by the second, Natsuki gripped the spoon tightly and used all her strength to get it into the bottle. Natsuki's yell of triumph was cut short by the sharp sting on her forefinger.

She ignored it, her focus more on getting her mayonnaise out and onto her piece of bread. Not wanting her delicious substance to face the same horrible fate of her previous bottle, (she shuddered and blushed at the sudden flash of Shizuru in mayo) she slowly was able to pull the spoon out of the mouth of the bottle. This time she did cry out in triumph as she had most of the left over substance. She spread it on her bread and blinked when she noticed a pee sized scrape on her finger. She sighed to herself when she noticed the skin turn slightly pink.

"Great." Natsuki took a bite of her sandwich and walked over to her sink and turned on the cold water. She grumbled to herself while the water lifted up the small flap of skin, which was removed from the rest of its kind, and washed away the red liquid. Taking a few more bites of her mayolicious sandwich, Natsuki moved to one of her cabinets in search of a band-aid. She furrowed her brows when she found none, swearing she just saw the box they were in just a few days prior.

The high school girl searched endlessly, making an even greater mess in her apartment than before, but she paid no attention to that. She knew in any event it wasn't that bad but she knew it was best if it was kept clean, years of tending her own scrapes and bruises taught her that (as well as the fear that Shizuru might just take it upon herself to do the 'treatment' for Natsuki).

She pulled off the piece of access skin and tossed it in the trash, then went to the fridge and pulled out the carton of milk. Glancing around the kitchen, just in case the band-aids decided to appear before her, she growled and took a drink of the milk.

"Ara, did Natsuki run out of clean glasses? Does she need me to come by everyday and clean for her?" Shizuru clapped her hands together and rested them on her cheek, cocking her head just slightly. "Or perhaps I shall just live here and take care of Natsuki."

Natsuki's eyes widened and she spit out most of the milk in her mouth, the rest she started to choke on. "Shi-Shizuru!?" She wiped her mouth on her sweater sleeve before barely containing a slight hiss when the rush of air hit her wound.

"Shit," She muttered under her breath. She shoved the last of the sandwich in her mouth and put the carton back in the fridge. She quickly walked over to the sink and stuck her finger under the running water. "What are you doing here?"

"Does Natsuki not remember inviting me over today?"

Natsuki blinked in confusion before cursing again. "Right, tutoring. I forgot…" She walked into her living room and down the small hallway that lead to her room. "I'll be right out." Natsuki mumbled. She had no worries about saying anything else, Shizuru knew not to expect anything else, which was fine with the crimson eyed girl, and she wouldn't have her Natsuki any other way. Well except maybe underneath her and…

The owner of the apartment walked back into her living room, her annoyance clear. When she looked at her friend it faded into curiousness. "Shizuru?"

"Mmm Natsuki…" Natsuki could have sworn the older girl was drooling.

"Mou, Shizuru!" She yelled out frustrated, the cut on her finger aggravating her more than she realized. "Tch, where the hell are my band-aids."

Shizuru, finally out of her never-ending day dreams of Natsuki deliciousness, (which inevitably 'never-ending' really meant all she did was push it just slightly to the side so she could pay attention to the real Natsuki) walked to her friend and gently grabbed the girl's hand. Lifting it up, she inspected the wound. "Ara, is Natsuki alright?"

"I'm fine." She muttered a light blush on her face. "Stupid bottle, stupid missing band-aids."

Shizuru's eyes gleamed with mischief when she heard the aggravated voice of her dream lover. "Does Natsuki not have the bandages for her boo-boo?"

"Boo-boo? What?"

"Then perhaps I shall treat Natsuki."

Before Natsuki could reply Shizuru brought the finger to her mouth and kissed it softly. Loving the blush on her younger friend, and the speechlessness she seemed to be in, Shizuru went a step, or five, further. She slipped the finger into her mouth, letting her tongue run over it lightly.

Natsuki let out a small gasp from the pain and the shock. "Shi-Shizuru…" She was too stunned to think straight and only stared at the girl in front of her as her pink, moist lips removed themselves from her injured appendage. She swallowed nervously when the pink tongue peeked its way out before retracting back into the mouth of her supposed healer.

"I'm surprised Natsuki doesn't taste like mayonnaise." Shizuru teased.

Natsuki turned her head, her face heated from multiple emotions, and coughed out her embarrassment. "Shizuru…" She mumbled. She felt unsure as to why she hadn't yelled at the girl yet, but ignored it, trying to find a way out of the uncomfortable situation.

"Fufufu, Natsuki's so cute!" She stopped Natsuki's soon to be rage of 'shut up's' when she pulled a small band-aid out of her bag and wrapped it around Natsuki's finger. She kissed the now covered wound and then walked to the living room. "What subject did Natsuki need help with?" She asked as if nothing had happened.

The green eyed girl stood there, staring into the empty space, in confusion. Her whole body seemed to flush in the matter of seconds before yelling out, "SHIZURU!"

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And that would be your bonus :D In the expense of myself. Lol

This came about from an actual event that I encountered yesterday while making myself a tuna sandwich. Sadly I do not have a Shizuru D: nor did I have any band-aids! I tell you air is the devil with an open cut… lol. AND I have no more mayo [cries Well actually we have real mayo, but I can't stand the stuff… I could not stop laughing while I wrote this either.

On another note! I'm currently writing the next segment of this random Mayo Catastrophe. It is looks sadly, roughly two pages at the moment lol. Since I hadn't expected to continue it I'm not sure where I'm taking it. But that's ok! I'll think of something. Though the name for this next part, since I'll make it a different story, I cannot think of. Maybe when I'm done with the first part I'll have one… if not… well I can certainly pull one out of my ass(I hope).

I was going to say more but I can't think of it because I was distracted by Xena. Despite the oldness of said show it still makes me laugh my ass off cuz of its awesome ridiculousness. Take care :3