S P O I L E D

As a teenager I always felt I had it a bit easier than my brothers during mating season. I suspected that my desires might not be as strong as theirs, and my two younger brothers especially seemed to suffer every time spring came. I've been able to access the internet in some form for almost as long as I could remember, and I was quick to realize what a useful resource the net could be during that time of year… Sure, I didn't have a credit card number to get access to any of the pay sites, but even just a Google image search with the SafeSurf feature turned off provided me with a plethora of outlets where I might easily vent my, uh – let's just say 'my frustrations'.

I remember how Leonardo and I used to laugh at the other two behind their backs – Raph especially – for being so cobbled by the season. Mikey was just loud and shameless, which was funny sometimes but more often it was just obnoxious. Raph, on the other hand, was an endless source of entertainment. He just spent the whole time so obviously anxious, humiliated, twitching, unable to sit still, and… just completely furious at the world in general! He would tear off into the sewers for 'alone time' at such regular intervals that we started making up games that could be timed by his disappearances. One year we even started following him, making this – well, it was sort of a documentary.

Looking back, it was a pretty awful thing to do to him.

We thought our younger brothers just weren't trying. They weren't focusing, or something… We assumed we were doing something right, and they just weren't getting it. But now, I can't help thinking that we didn't know anything at all. Now I wonder if this misery I am feeling is anything like what Raph must have felt, year after year. Now I feel like shit for every ignorant word I ever spoke against him in my youth.

I've got a theory. This just might be cosmic justice at work. It's my karmic payback for the large role I played in producing and co-directing "Hotheads in Heat".

Somehow I just assumed I could go back to my usual methods of coping with the season. It didn't even OCCUR to me that this mating season might be any more difficult for me than all the times I'd gone into heat before…

But it was difficult. Much, much more difficult, this time. More difficult than I have ever known - ever would have IMAGINED! And do you want to know why? I've got a pretty solid theory…

It's because now I know what it's like to have a girlfriend during mating season.

In other words, I'm really fucking spoiled.

Now I know what it's like. Now I need to be inside someone. And all these JPGs and video clips just weren't CUTTING IT ANYMORE, OKAY?

I needed someone. I needed someone real.

And I needed them now.

Oh God, it was getting bad. I mean, curled at the edge of my bed, slowly rocking and biting down on one of my knuckles bad. Man, it was a good thing I was locked in my room. If my brothers, or my sensei, or anyone ever saw me like this I'm pretty sure I would drop dead from a terminal case of embarrassment.

I'm pretty sure that at this moment I look a bit like a crazy-eyed drug fiend. Or maybe some frantic, caged animal.

Come to think of it, I may even look like Raph.

Not even armed with that grim and steel-faced stoicism he can muster these days, but the way Raph looked huddled on the edge of our couch at age fourteen, right before he had to bolt from the lair.

Inevitably, my gaze went back to the nightstand. In the top drawer there, near the back, was the charm she had given me. I kept looking towards it. But I couldn't use it. I couldn't, I couldn't, I couldn't...

Not now. Not for this. I would not be that base or that selfish. I would not be ruled by my instincts like a mindless animal! It had not been a wrong move to break up with her, I kept telling myself furiously. I didn't love her. So I couldn't be with her. I couldn't be with her because I didn't love her.

I couldn't help it, though… I kept thinking about last year. Last year, oh, and how sweet she had been. She had been so good to me. So fucking generous. The girl scheduled time off for me, can you imagine? Just so I could spend a bit more time between her thighs during what she cutely referred to as my 'time of need'!

"Ren..." I moaned, throwing myself plastron-down onto my bed and tugging at the linens with my fists. "Why, why, why did I let you go, Ren? Oh God, sweetheart. I need you. I need you so much, I can't fucking stand it…"

This was, of course, just me being a total baby. Please understand that I was whining all this to myself, in the privacy of my own bedroom. I was having a sad little fit of self pity and rampant, unsatisfied arousal or something. And I can assure you, it was not meant to be heard by anyone. At all.

Particularly not by her.

She didn't come right away. Oh no. At first she only teased me with her presence. The flowery smell of her perfume suddenly filled the room, and naturally I assumed I was imagining it. I got up and went to the restroom to splash some cold water on my face, and was surprised when the smell did not seem to follow me… Then it was back! And the water was now running hot instead of cold, without my ever having touched the left faucet.

So yeah. All that was a little weird, but there were logical explanations for any one of those occurrences… At least, there was until she started drawing little hearts for me in the steamed up mirrors.

By that point I was on to her. I was also a little bit spooked by her theatrics, to be honest, but I tried to hide this. Storming out of the bathroom, I moved to stand in the middle of my room and looked around, foot tapping impatiently. "Ren? You can come out now. I know you're there."

And just like that, she was. "Hi, Pumpkin!"

Renet looked beautiful, of course. She always had.

I took a deep, steadying breath. I could do this. I was strong enough to send her away again. I am Hamato Donatello and I will not be ruled by my instincts!

Stepping forward, I rushed to assure her that I hadn't meant any of what I'd just said. I apologized. Profusely. I explained how very much I did, in fact, respect her. Both as a friend and as a young woman. I told her how glad I was that we had been able to stay friends even after having parted ways romantically, and how horrible I would feel if I somehow took advantage of her, just because of the unavoidable state I was in. And did I mention that could possibly jeopardize our friendship? Because it could! It absolutely could. And that… would be terribly awful. Because of how much I respected her! And…

And… yeah. Okay, look. I think it was a pretty good speech, considering the duress I was under at the time.

She just smiled at me, twirling a golden lock of hair. "Uh-huh!"

My honorable but less than eloquent monologue pretty much fell apart at that point, "So, yeah. That's. Um. Those are. Pretty much my thoughts on the whole idea of, you know. Stuff." Eyes on her face, man! Keep your eyes on her FACE! "Happening. Between the two of us, just now. So, uh, did you have anything. You, uh. You wanted to say, I guess?

"Yep!" she chirped, bouncing once on her toes.

"Right, well," I continued to fumble my words left and right like a total moron. "Um, by all means. Please, uh. Go ahead."

"Wanna see a trick?"

I stared at her. "I did sort of mean… you know. In response. To, uh." She bounced some more, as if eagerly waiting in suspense. This had a very interesting effect on her ample cleavage. I gave up the whole 'eyes on her face' thing as a hopeless lost cause. "Okay," I groaned. "Whatever. Fine, show me your trick."

Renet's delicate hands lifted and fluttered in a pretty gesture meant to indicate herself. "Now you seeeee me..." she announced, with slow and dramatic flair.

I blinked once in surprise. Well, if her trick was disappearing – that speech worked even better than I thought.

Then she suddenly jumped into the air, throwing her arms and legs wide like a cheerleader and squealing, "…now you see me NAKED!"

Just like that… she was. Poof!

Every glorious inch of her.

After that, come on. Can you really blame me for the rest?

I hope you'll at least believe me when I say that I tried.