Author's note: I've been on kind of a HSM streak for the moment… so the obvious thing to do is create one of those ever-funny parodies of one of the songs, Warriors-style. Naturally, here's one of my favorite song, Stick to the Status Quo…

Stick to the Status Quo…

Warriors Style!

It was a relatively normal Gathering night, the warriors and apprentices talking quietly amongst themselves as the leaders prepared themselves to speak. As usual, the cats were split into their four Clans, rarely venturing outside to speak to members of other Clans. Some cats were sharing funny hunting stories, some were attempting to go to sleep after a whole day of activity, and one tom was even doing some kind of odd dance to entertain his Clanmates. But still, all was normal… until Leafpool started singing.

Opening her jaws wide, the medicine cat's voice was clear as crystal as every cat turned to look at her;

"You've all learned
I've only got eyes for my herbs
When my Clanmates are in need

But I've got a confession
My own secret obsession
And I'm confusing yarrow and poppy seeds"

Naturally, the other ThunderClan cats all responded, showing off their own voice:
"Everybody gather 'round"

The shy she-cat looked nervously around at all of the wide eyes, staring straight at her, before nervously saying;
"Well, you know, my sister has a boyfriend, so… I still love Crowfeather."

"What?" shrieked the other cats, and Jaypaw slapped her. Nightcloud, too, looked ready to claw her fur off.

She couldn't stop now, so she mewed, "But he's so cute! His fur, his eyes… even his crazy moodiness!"

Still shocked, the other cats managed to sing, "Not another sound"

Now completely forgetting the other cats and caught up in her fantasies, she mewed in a rather squeaky, fangirly voice, "Someday I'd like to have his kits!"

Some of the ThunderClan cats tut-tutted and most of them glared at her before singing;
"No, no, no, nooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
Now, don'cha know
To keep to the code
Don't mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo"

After that drama had finished, all eyes turned to the crowd of RiverClan cats as Mistyfoot started to sing;
"Look at me
And what do you see
Loyalty beyond compare
But inside I am stirring
Something strange is occuring
It's a secret I need to share"

Hey Clanmates eagerly replied;
"Open up, dig way down deep"

Proudly, Mistyfoot mewed, "I like to eat rabbits! I love their taste, their scent, everything!"

Minnowpaw frowned and whispered to Pebblepaw, "That's gotta be against the code somewhere…"

All together, the RiverClan cats sang;

"Not another peep"

Looking a bit annoyed, Mistyfoot replied, "It's just different prey! Sometimes I think it tastes better than fish…"

Sighing, the RiverClan cats sang, in an effort to get through to her;

"No, no, no, noooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
It is better by far
To eat minnows and carp
Don't mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo"

Meanwhile, in the darker ShadowClan section of the island, Tawnypelt spoke, or rather, sang up.
"Listen well
I'm ready to tell
Because I cannot live this lie
Cats, there's no explanation
For this oddly strange sensation
But I'm ready to let it fly"

Eagerly, the ShadowClan cats sang back, in remarkably well-practiced voices;
"Speak your mind and you'll be heard"

Quieter, Tawnypelt turned to her Clan and said, "All right, if RiverClanners are eating rabbits, then I want to come clean. I like to be nice!"

"Awesome!" cried Romanclaw, as Owlpaw asked, "Whazzat mean?"

Tawnypelt attempted to put on an overly-friendly grin in explanation, and Romanclaw exclaimed, "Creepy?! COOOL!!!"

Tawnypelt sighed and cried, "No, dude, it means, like… friendly! Peaceful!"

The ShadowClan cats sighed and hissed, still managing to have fairly good singing voices;
"Not another word"

Owlpaw, confused, asked, "Does that mean we can't attack people?"

Tawnypelt nodded vigorously, glad to see that the apprentice understood. "Stop battles too!"

Blackstar rolled his eyes. Rowanclaw stared at his mate, shocked. The whole Clan exploded into singing;
"No, no, no, nooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
Now you've gotta be rude
So get yourself a 'tude
Don't mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quoooooooo"

Now with one thing in common—all of them were weirded out by their Clanmates, every cat in every Clan sang;

"No, no, no
stick to the stuff you know
It is better by far
To keep things as they are
Don't mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status quo"

Nervously, Leopardstar paced in the center of the island, where she was standing with the other leaders.
"This is not what I want.
This is not what planned.
And I just gotta say, I do not understand.
Something is really..."

Blackstar cut in, hissing;
"Something's not right"

Leopardstar cut him off by swishing her tail in front of his face and sang;
"Really wrong"

Together, the two leaders sang;
"And we gotta get things
Back where they belong
We can do it"

Tawnypelt cried, "Sweet as heather!"

The ShadowClan cats hissed;
"Stick with what you know"

The two leaders, oblivious to the other cats, sang;
"We can do it"

Mistyfoot, preoccupied with her attempt to combine a rabbit and a fish, frustratedly cried, "Stick together!"

The RiverClan cats looked nervously at each other and sang;
"She has got to go"

Leopardstar and Blackstar sang;
"We can do it"

Leafpool grinned and shrieked, "Go Crowfeather!"

The ThunderClan cats grabbed her, and embarrassed to be seen with her, cried;
"Keep your voice down low"

All together, the Clans sang;
"Not another peep
No, not another word
No, not another sound
No"

Losing her temper, Leopardstar shrieked, "Everyone, SHUT UP!!!"

Just walking up to the center of the island, Firestar stopped and asked Brambleclaw, "Why is everybody looking at me?"

Brambleclaw rolled his eyes and hissed, "Not me! You!"

Firestar looked back at him, confused. "Because Leafpool's a stalker? Not my problem."

Again, the Clans sang altogether;
"Noooooooooooooo, no, no, no
Sick to the stuff you know
Now, don'cha know
To stick to the code
Don't mess with the flow, oh no
Stick to the status quooooooooooooo
No, no, no
Stick to the stuff you know
It is better by far
To eat minnows and carp

Don't mess with the flow, no no
Stick to the status
stick to the status
Stick to the status quo"

With that, they all began cheering wildly at their awesome singing voices, and Firestar, still confused, continued his march up to the center of the island. Leopardstar narrowed her eyes angrily, while Blackstar gazed blankly into nothingness. Onestar went over to congratulate his Clan on the fact that they had no weirdos, and Leafpool went the same way to find her Crowfeather and beat up Nightcloud.