Greetings, anyone who cares to read these sentences. To celebrate the release of the final game in the .hack/GU series, I thought I'd stick the main characters on a deserted island and watch as they compete to see who the ultimate player is. Then again, I could just eat some cake…but if things go well, this will certainly be more entertaining to watch!
Disclaimer: The .hack series currently belongs to Namco Bandai. Since the chances of me winning the lottery are quite unlikely, don't expect that to change any time soon.
Prologue: Great minds think alike. Not-so-great minds come up with reality show ideas.
"This…is terribly, terribly bad," a man told himself as he paced up and down the streets of Mac Anu. But, this man was not just any ordinary man that you'd usually find saying something so vague! No, this man was Kazubolo, whose identity in real life was the famous Salvador Aihara! He had fame, money, women…well, he at least he has fame and money. So it might be surprising that he's in a bit of a funk right now.
Sure, he had a bunch of devoted fans all over the country of Japan. And since there was the occasional girl that didn't try to slap him at first sight, things should be much better than they are. But ever since that single incident with that Toru kid, even though he was the best journalist this half of the world has ever known, his popularity had been dwindling. After all, once you've seen telekinesis, a near-death experience, and a voluptuous female assistant all at once, it's kinda hard to top.
As the star was walking back and forth, trying to think of an excellent idea, he failed to realize that a female player by the name of –COOH was approaching him from behind. As soon as Kazubolo turned around to pace in the other direction, he received a swift smack right in the forehead.
"You pompous jerk!" the Harvest Cleric yelled at him. "You tell me how lovely I look, ask to meet me in Dol Dana at three o'clock sharp so we could quest together!"
"Hey, it's only two! What's with the anger?" Kazubolo inquired. Even when sulking, he had always tried to keep a date.
"You told me that FOUR DAYS AGO!" the other player screeched back. Just because Kazubolo tried, it doesn't mean he's too successful. "Do you have ANY idea how angry I am right now?! I wish you'd just get on a ship, crash on an island, and I'll never have to see your face AGAIN!"
"…EUREKA!" Kazubolo burst in excitement, somewhat startling the other player. He remembered that, in America, there had been a famous reality show called Survivor. A bunch of people were put into teams, stranded on an island, voted somebody off each week, and the last contestant on the island won some kinda prize. It had it been surprisingly popular; tons of sequels and spoofs had been released afterwards. This was just the kind of event that could save his career!
One single call to his manager later was all it took to get the ball rolling. 18 famous players from The World would be brought to an area specially designed by C.C. Corp for this exciting event. Kazubolo would be the host, of course, and people would e-mail his business associates every week to dish out compliments and, occasionally, vote for one of their favourites to stay on. Challenges and the props needed to perform them had already been downloaded. Now, all that was left to do was pick out the 'lucky' contestants…
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"Hey, guys!" the green-clothed Blade Brandier called to his two friends. Silabus, leader of Canard before Haseo had taken over, had planned to go training with Gaspard and Kuhn today. However, an e-mail he had received seconds earlier changed all of that entirely. "You'll never guess what I just got sent to me!"
"An invitation to that 'Survivor: World 2' event? Sorry to ruin it, but we got some invites ourselves," Kuhn, epitaph wielder and ladies man, told the eager player. "I guess there's nobody more famous than a friend of Haseo…unless you're a rival, of course."
"A Rival? Are you hiding something? How could you possibly know who the other contestants are?!" Silabus badgered.
"Relax; I'm just speculating. Still, I've heard a few rumours…"
Gaspard silently stood to the side as Kuhn and Silabus continued to converse between themselves, thinking about whom he'd be teamed up with when the time comes. I'd probably be cool to hang out with Piros some more, the Shadow Warlock thought. But I wouldn't mind having to share a room with somebody like Matsu. Then again, if the grand prize is something like a one-of-a-kind card that you can only get once, being with Haseo and Pi would certainly help my chances. Too bad we won't know what sides we're on until the day actually comes…
The rest of that day, for the three of them at least, was nothing more than discussion about the big event. Who would REALLY be on the show? What was the mysterious grand prize? Would Salvador mess up big time in front of a gigantic audience? Sadly, their answers had to wait; the event would not begin until a date that was not today.
So, are you interested yet? The teams are already decided, but feel free to leave a comment or two.