Derek was standing at the door of the hospital looking out over the parking lot. He had heard that Meredith was dating Jake now, not that she had spoken to him since he had accused her of sleeping her way to the top. Why had he done that? He was just so mad at her, even though he knew in theory he shouldn't be mad at her. He was married, she was free to do anything she wanted. But she was Meredith and the thought of any other man touching her made Derek sick to his stomach. But it got worse than that, it wasn't just Jake touching her it was the way he looked at her, like he was falling in love with her, and…Derek didn't think he could handle Meredith falling in love with someone.

"Derek…are you listening to me?" suddenly Addison's hand was waving in front of his face.

"Huh…what? How long have you been there?"

"Long enough to know who you're thinking about," sighed Addison. "Seriously Derek, this has to stop."

"I don't know what you're talking about," said Derek completely unconvincingly.

"I'm talking about Meredith Grey," said Addison then she added quietly. "I can't keep turning a blind eye to this, you have to at least try to get over her and give this a try."

Then he spotted them. Meredith getting out of Jake's car, both of them laughing about something. Meredith was wearing a Yankee's shirt, about four sizes too big for her. Jake was also wearing the same shirt, they had clearly been to the game before coming to work. Then Jake just reached out and took Meredith's hand and they just walked towards the hospital, holding hands!

"I'm serious Derek. Get it together or I'm walking," snapped Addison who saw exactly what Derek was staring at and just how furious he was. She could never get a reaction like that from him.

"Whatever," muttered Derek as Meredith and Jake passed him.

----------------------------------------

"Meredith," Derek called to her later that day.

"Dr. Shepherd," said Meredith professionally.

"Meredith," he repeated.

"It's Dr. Grey," she sniped at him.

"I'm sorry," he said ignoring her request to call her Dr. Grey. "I'm so sorry for what I said to you. I didn't mean it, I was just…just…"

"Just what?" snapped Meredith. "An asshole…a selfish bastard…what?"

"I was going to say an ass but yours work too," said Derek pathetically attempting to lighten the mood. "I didn't mean it."

"You didn't mean what?" she said. "That I'm sleeping my way to the top, looking for some twisted sort of father relationship with older men or you didn't mean it when you said I could scrub in on your surgery this afternoon?"

"The first two," said Derek, hanging his head. She had every right to be mad at him, but he just wanted things to be okay between them again, more than okay but he would take what he could get. "You're a wonderful person and a great doctor and I had no right to suggest that your morals were anything less than respectable."

"Fine apology accepted, Dr. Shepherd."

"Meredith it's Derek, it's always been Derek," said Derek feeling helpless.

"You're my boss," said Meredith flatly.

"So is Dr. Henderson," as soon as Derek said it he wished he could take it back.

"Dr. Henderson is my boss," snapped Meredith. "And while at work I refer to him as Dr. Henderson…and at least he isn't married."

"Meredith I'm sorry," Derek called after Meredith as she stormed away from him. "I love you."

"What?" said Meredith twirling round on her heel. "What did you just say?"

"I said I love you," said Derek not caring that anyone could overhear.

"No you love your wife," said Meredith struggling to stay calm.

"I love you," said Derek as if it was only just hitting him. "I love you."

"Stop saying that," hissed Meredith pulling him by the arm into an empty exam room.

"I just…I didn't know until…"

"Until I moved on. You weren't interested when I was miserable and pining for you…"

"You're pining for me?"

"Shut up! I've moved on, I'm dating Jake and he's perfect for me. He's smart, sweet, funny…he's a surgeon too…he gets me. He makes me feel…he doesn't make me love him then leave me for his wife!"

"You don't love him?" said Derek with a goofy smile on his face.

"That is none of your business."

"I'll get a divorce."

"Do whatever the hell you want, I don't care anymore," said Meredith sounding a little half heartedly. In reality she really wasn't over Derek and she hated it, she so desperately wanted to stop loving him and stop all the pain she was in. The thought of his divorcing Addison and telling her he loved her made her heart race and a feeling of hope rise in her throat and she hated it.

"Are you sure?" Derek murmured as he ran his index finger down her cheek.

Meredith gasped as his skin made contact with her. "Derek, please don't do this."

"I have to."

"No you don't," she whispered. "We were fine."

"I wasn't fine."

"You were jealous, that's all," she said.

"That's not all."

"Ah so you were jealous," Meredith couldn't resist teasing him, almost as if that meant that this conversation wasn't happening.

"Perhaps."

"I thought you didn't get jealous."

"I don't," Derek insisted. "I think this is the first time. You seem to do something to me no' one else ever has."

"Derek be serious," sighed Meredith. "We can't do this. You have to go back to your wife…you choose her you don't get to tell me you love me."

"I chose wrong."

"Too bad."

"Don't say that," said Derek cradling her head in his hand. "Don't tell me I don't even have a chance anymore. Don't tell me you don't love me."

Meredith looked away praying he couldn't tell what she was feeling.

"Meredith…"

"Love doesn't disappear overnight," she said.

"Do you still love me?"

"I don't know."

"I'm getting a divorce," he said firmly. "At least I know you're not completely opposed to giving me another shot."

"I am actually," said Meredith but even she didn't believe it.

"I'll make it up to you, I swear," Derek whispered kissing her cheek. "I have to go and end my marriage now." He said leaving Meredith wondering what the hell had just happened.