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Category-Romance/Scenario-Peanut Butter-Harp, Buzz, Snorkel/ Rating Grown-Up

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Remus Lupin was a dejected, lonely werewolf. He was so good at it, that some people thought he actually liked it. ( Being lonely and dejected that it is. Not being a werewolf...which he hated. )

He didn't really have a good excuse to be lonely anymore...except that three of his best friends and his mentor had all died horrific deaths; his fourth best friend had turned out to be a nasty little traitor that liked being bullied about by You-Know-Who.

Other than that he should have been chipper.

On one particular Tuesday, ( it's always Tuesday, he thought mournfully.) he was strolling along Diagon Alley with his head hung down and his ears perked up. His clothes were shabby and patched, he was cold, hungry, and tired. He looked and felt like a beggar. He wasn't really a beggar, it was just that no one wanted to give him work.

He thought woefully about his lost teaching position at Hogwarts. That had been many years ago, and so many things had happened since. None of them were very pleasant to think about, therefore he dwelt on them constantly just to punish himself. He was certain that he deserved to be punished for something.

With a great sigh, he looked around him at the milling people, all colorfully dressed and unaware of just how rotten things could be on Tuesdays. Many of them were children, eagerly entering and exiting a colorful shop across the street. Ah, Weasley Wizarding Wheezes. The best place to go when the when the world was a grey, hopeless affair.

With that thought, he gave a small shrug, and crossed the street. It had been awhile since he had seen Fred and George, and maybe he had just enough change for a Singing Slug Bar or maybe a drink with them at the pub.

The sidewalk outside was covered with a light sprinkling of green dust, and Fred was sweeping it away from the door. He grinned broadly when he saw Remus.

" Oh, Hello, Remus! Just the man we want to see! Oi, George! Look who it is!" Fred jerked his thumb toward Remus.

George came out of the shop, dusting more of the green powder off of his sleeves. He grinned like a quarter moon, and slapped Remus enthusiastically on the back.

" The man indeed! Come on inside!"

" What's with all the dust? " Remus asked, even as his mood lightened against his will.

" Oh...nothing. One of the kids blew up some prank wands." Fred said quickly, and pushed Lupin inside.

George produced a box of candy bars.

" We just finished a batch of our newest invention. Take one. They're chocolate."

Remus raised a hand then paused, a look of distrust on his face.

" No seriously. " Fred urged." These are 'Feel Good Bars'. Just chocolate, but with all the good stuff 'enhanced' . One bar should have the power of five! Go on, eat!"

Besides, Fred thought to himself, It looks as though you could use it.

Remus grinned and unwrapped one.

" Well, I hold you boys responsible for whatever happens!" he joked. Some of the green dust had settled on the chocolate, and he brushed it ff halfheartedly.

" You are going to love us for it!" George insisted proudly.

" You'll be a new man!"

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The girl in the bed was sleeping sweetly, and serenely. In fact, she looked dead. The person beside her was very relieved to hear her breathing change to a series of soft sighs as she began to wake up.

Even though she had never, in all of her twenty-four years of life, found herself in a strange bed...she didn't seem to be the least bit startled. In fact her expression was so mild as to suggest that even an Abominable Snow Monster in a miniskirt wouldn't surprise her.

She knew right away of course that this wasn't her room, because her room was pearly blue, and had shelves full of interesting junk and old books. This room was brown.

It was a very small room too, with a small charmed fireplace burning at one end. In front of the fire, an inviting sofa, the perfect size for two people, seemed to be waiting with arms outstretched. There was a small table as well, complete with a vase of orange flowers, and a bowl of expensive chocolates.

She gave a half smile at the flowers, admiring the pert blossoms even as she tried to remember why she might be sharing a room with them.

It might be a hospital room, she thought idly. But she didn't feel sick. Or injured.

She turned her head slightly to the right, wondering if that side of the room might contain anything more exciting. Only the very minimal widening of her eyes gave away her surprise that the other half of the bed was occupied.

A thin man, with a haggard face, and greying brown hair, was sitting rigidly upright, holding the blanket to his waist as though releasing his grip would kill him. His amberish eyes were as large as bludgers, and looked as though he hadn't blinked in ages.

She raked a soothing gaze over him, sparing a little pity for his embarrassed expression, and interest in the pale scars that peppered his chest.

" Oh...I guess this isn't a hospital room after all. " she smiled.

The wild caged look faded slightly, but his voice was a bit shaky.

" No...I don't think it is." he peered closely at her." It's...Miss Lovegood, am I right?"

She smiled wider, flattered.

" It was. Now it's Whitewood."

His face paled. He was in bed with another man's wife.He had broken the ultimate Wizarding law...and he couldn't even remember whether or not the she had been worth it.

" He's dead, you know. " she offered nonchalantly.

" Who is dead?"

" My husband...Ingle Whitewood."

" Oh. I am sorry." but not guilty of adultery, he thought, relieved.

" I wish I could be, but I told him often enough not to go putting his hand into Flundermole burrows."

Her companion regarded her for a moment, blinking at last.

" Well..." he began carefully. " I guess it wouldn't be wise."

" Definitely not. But then, he wasn't exactly wise." she nodded sagely. " He used to tease Gidderbugs too."

He bit the inside of his cheek.

" I know who you are." she stated. " You're Professor Lupin ."

He smiled slightly. " Well, it's no longer ' Professor' ."

" I know. But you were so perfect for the job.I always liked you best. "

" Thank you."

" The only bad part was that Snape used to take over your classes. "

" Yes..well..."

" I don't think Professor Snape liked me very much. " she stated, frowning slightly.

" Well, Severus kept a very minimal social circle." he reassured her.

" I wouldn't have minded. Only he was so stubborn. He never would answer my questions about the Frindberg Fire Fairy. "

Remus was about to tell her that the Frindberg Fairy had been a legend invented to scare away Muggles; but then decided against it.

" It was probably just his rheumatism acting up." he said instead.

An awkward silence fell on the room. They had both visually scanned the room, and each had ascertained privately that the room had no doors, no windows...and there was no sign of their clothes or wands. The mattress sat on the floor, and had only one brown blanket for cover.

" Do you think we are prisoners, professor?" she asked.

" Please, call me Remus. I honestly have no clue. It...really doesn't feel like a prison."

" It's like we've fallen into a secret room, like the Room of Requirement."

" Any ideas how we might fall back out?" he asked dryly, then instantly regretted it. The girl's face fell, and it was as though a cloud had veiled the moon.

" I wouldn't know." she answered, and sat up. She drew up her knees and rested her cheek on them, and he turned his head so as not to look at the long expanse of back that her new position revealed.

" There might be a switch or lever that opens a hidden door..." he said.

" You could look." she replied, and he almost did. But at the last moment, he remembered that he wore no clothes.

" What's the matter?" she asked.

" I seem to have on no clothes." he stated.

Her face blushed lightly. " I'll lend you the blanket, if you promise not to peek at me. " she whispered.

" I swear." he closed his eyes, and Luna flipped the blanket over him entirely. He wrapped it about his waist, and without a glance at her, he stood, and began searching the room.

The adventure was brief. He found nothing except the chocolates and the flowers...there was not even a proper chimney in the fireplace.

He even ran his hands under the sofa cushions, because if he were a wand, that's where he'd be hiding.

There was nothing, so he sat down, exasperated. Thus preoccupied, he didn't hear her approach. She startled him when she touched his shoulder and he looked up, only to redden, and look away, just as quickly. Without a word, she seated herself beside him, and he loosened the edge of the blanket to allow her some cover. The sat side by side, staring at the fire.

" It's like a very strange dream, isn't it?" he asked after awhile.

Luna shrugged her left shoulder.

" I dreamed I was an air fern once." she stated." It was lovely, but then a very fat little boy came along and tried to choke me by strangling my roots."

Remus nodded, as if she had said something profound. As a matter of fact, he wasn't too certain she hadn't said something profound, as everything she said, and didn't say, was uttered with such earnest conviction.

" I dreamed I was a wolf once." he said , and grinned slyly at her smile of acknowledgment." But then, I grew octopus arms and tickled myself until I woke up."

" I read in a book by Quiver McMortus, the only source on exotic magical creatures, that a sort of were-eel had been hybridized. Do you think it is possible to have were-octopi?"

" If it is possible..." he said, taking a chocolate from the bowl." to wake up naked, and wand-less, in bed with an ex-student, in a strange prison that gives you champagne and chocolate...but no doors, then yes. A were-octopi could be right around the corner."

Luna smiled and took a chocolate for herself.

" Except we have no corners." she admitted.

" But we have a warm fire, a box of candies...and this bottle of champagne which I could swear was not here earlier. Maybe if we mix accordingly, we can work out how we came to be here. And who we should hex after escaping."

" Well...I should be insulted that you want to escape..." Luna said softly, " but if there is ever a time when a person asks themselves who is culprit, it is definitely either that person himself, or one of the Weasley twins. "

He realized that in all the time he had he had known her, this was the most she had ever spoken. He thought about the brief time she had joined the Order, and had shown a very special type of intuitive brilliance.

She was brave, and smart, but she and Hermione Granger, who was much more outspoken and caustic with her intelligence, had never quite 'mixed.' Hermione had never approved of Luna's willingness to embrace the absurd, and he wondered if Hermione's haughtiness had dissuaded Luna from speaking out more on important matters.

" Well...'' he mused after a moment " Let's go with the Weasley theory. Why would they have done this?"

" Prank present."

" It isn't my birthday." he joked.

" I know." she answered shyly.

He raised a brow.

" Really, Miss er...Ms...Umm..."

" Luna. Just call me Luna. "

" Like the moon."

" Oh...I didn't think of it that way. If it makes you uncomfortable, you can call me Alice."

" Why Alice?"

" No harm ever came from being an Alice." she indicated the chocolates and the wine bottle. " They might as well say ' eat-me' and 'drink me', for all the sense this makes."

" I like Luna. You're as close to the moon as I have gotten, without being burned."

For a moment her face glowed like the moon...and she leaned over and kissed his cheek.

" What was that for?" he asked, laughing.

" That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me."

What kind of idiot was Ingle Whitewood, then? Remus asked himself. If a man is idiotic enough to get his hand chewed off by a Flundermole, then he was probably fool enough to take Luna for granted.

Her simple smile made Remus smile...and as they sat smiling together for awhile, the way people do when they don't know what to say to each other.

He did realize, just as the smiles were beginning to fade a bit, that this was the most fun he had experienced in over five years, and if being locked in a room with no doors is more fun than your everyday life, it's time for you to re-examine your goals and priorities.

For example, he realized that he had completely forgotten to mope...and he had never been able to go more than a few minutes without feeling incredibly bad about something.

To test himself, he thought about Sirius. Instead of the usual pang of anguished sorrow and guilt, he felt only a soft sadness. The type of fond sadness that you feel when you remember that pet hamster that died years and years ago. He thought about James and Lily Potter, and it felt more like a pet goldfish. When he thought of Peter Pettigrew, he was momentarily irritated, but it flitted by.

He thought of Harry, and was able call to mind the boys good points, and ignore all off the irksome personality traits he had acquired over the years.

He took a deep breath and thought of being a werewolf. It wasn't so bad, really. Didn't he get to romp around under the moon three nights a month, without any regard to social standards? Couldn't he roll in the grass, eat undercooked venison,and track mud all over his own floors; and never feel bad about it?

He wondered what Luna would think of that? Well, there was only one way to find out what a woman would think about something.

" Luna?"

" Yes? " she was licking chocolate from her fingers, and he wished for a moment he wished he were covered in chocolate too.

" What do you think of werewolves?'

She wasn't taken aback.

" Well, I've only met two; and one was a bit of a sulky pig. The other was a sweet bloke, but rather clueless." she glanced up at him through her yellow lashes.

" I hope I'm not the sulky pig!" he blurted out before he could stop himself.

Luna winked at him; a rather disarming gesture that he couldn't fathom.

" Why do you ask?" she prompted.

" I was just thinking that being a werewolf isn't so bad, but sometimes I track mud in the house. Should I feel guilty about?"

" Mud sweeps out."

" Sometimes I eat wild game. Deer...Raw."

" Better than eating raw children, or yuck, cats.""

" Who was the other werewolf you knew?"

" Axicles Norstead...I interviewed him for an article in the Quibbler."

" Ahh...yes. I read that article."

" You did?" he finally found something to say that pleased her.

" Yes. There is a scarcity of werewolf literature. I was very intrigued."

" Most people see my magazine as rubbish."

" I see the Daily Prophet as rubbish." he said, grinning. " Painful garbage.The Quibbler though, is entertaining. I enjoy the articles...and the accompanying crosswords. "

" Those were my idea."

" You're brilliant."

" Don't tease me." she flipped her hair, suddenly defensive.

He lifted her hand and brought it to his lips. He planted a soft kiss between the knuckles, before taking a taste of her fingers. She jumped a bit. That was something that Ingle had never done.

" I never give compliments that aren't sincere." he said sternly, not releasing her hand.

" I think perhaps that I interviewed the wrong werewolf. "

" You can interview me anytime."

" Could I ask you a few questions now, to pass the time?'

" Only three. "

" Three. Okay. " she pretended to think for a moment." What is your favorite colour?"

" Blue." he smiled.

" What are your hobbies?"

" Reading. And when possible, collecting old wands."

" Really? That's a strange hobby, but interesting!"

" It began as an accident, my great-great-grandfather's wand came down to me. I didn't want it to be lonely."

" I would love to see your collection!"

" I can't think of anyone else I would trust to see them. What's your third question?"

" If a fairly intelligent but clueless man, such as yourself, were to find himself locked in a room with a naked woman, and a bottle of champagne...what would you do?"

It was his turn to pretend to think.

" I believe, that that would depend on the woman. If the woman were a colleague, I would chat about the weather, the predicament, and the possibility of escape. If the woman were a relative, I would be horribly embarrassed, and if the woman were you I would ask myself just what I had done to please the gods lately...and try to kiss you."

And with that he coiled forward rapidly,and struck her lips a little too hard with his own. She winced and pulled away. He looked sheepish before trying again, a bit softer.

After what seemed like an eternal kiss; soft, and caressing, Luna pulled away and touched his nose.

" I have a secret." she whispered.

" Please don't tell me that you are a figment of my imagination."

" No...or well, " she looked around, " I don't think so. No, I just wanted you to know that I have fancied you for years."

" Fancied me?" he asked, startled.

" Of course!" Luna sounded as though he should have known this. " I only agreed to marry Ingle because he looked like you. He married me because I was single. Never do that."

" Do what, marry you?"

" No, marry someone because they look like someone else. He was nothing like you. He never read a book, can you believe that?"

" Er...well."

" If he had, he might be alive to today. I was very disappointed."

" That he died?"

" Well, yes. No. Mostly that he was not you. You would never have put your hand in a Flundermole burrow. I fancied you quite dearly. That's why I left the Order you know."

He didn't' know.

" It broke my heart to be around you all the time."

" You should have said something."

She shot him a reprimanding look.

" We both know that you wouldn't have gone this far by yourself! You would have given me a sweet little lecture on your age, my future, and the miseries of the world."

Remus colored.

That was exactly what he would have done...under normal circumstances.

" You can still lecture me if that makes you feel better...but I'll still fancy you tomorrow." she reached up and ran her fingers gently through his hair. In the past few years, it had turned nearly all grey; the brown was just a suggestion.

" I think I will save my breath for another day." he smiled.

" Save it for kisses, Remus."

" Kisses." he repeated, leaning closer to her. She reached out and took his face between her hands, and pulled him to her. A small doubt lingered in his mind about the wisdom of such a venture. Where were they? What was going on?

But just like his failed attempt at being mopey, his attempt at being practical only extended as far as hoping no one was spying on them or planning to interrupt at any time in the next...hour. Or maybe, four hours. Luna had just slipped her tongue through his willingly parted lips.

" Chocolate." she said. " I've wanted to do that for so long."

He couldn't help but wish he had spent more time with this young woman. Well, she was right, at that time, even if she had declared her undying love for him, he would have chided her gently, pointed her toward the nearest Boy-Her-Own-Age, and sent her off with a lecture about her future and his unworthiness ringing in his ears. Despite whatever feelings he had been harboring himself.

But that was then. She had been a student. Now she was widow. Owner of a magazine that had at last surpassed the stage of cheap rag, but had matured into an expensive rag. A magazine that everyone claimed to loathe, yet it was hidden under every arm-chair and bed in the country. Hadn't he even seen Hermione Granger, née Weasley, reading one when he visited them at Christmas? That made Luna more successful that even Dumbledore.

Surely it wasn't taking advantage of her now. And who else would have the least aversion to someone of his particular species? And besides...hadn't he always thought she was cute? Hadn't he always liked to think if her in reference the moon?

A sudden flash of future came to him, of himself at the time of the approaching full moon. A cozy cottage somewhere near a forest, with a sturdy safe-room built to keep her safe. he would tell her to go in and she would, without complaint, after leaving out a bowl of water, and some ground beef in case he couldn't catch a deer.

The thought of her sitting in her little room knitting a baby sweater while he frolicked in the yard should have made him nervous, but right now, with her tracing the shape of the scars and tendons across his torso, he felt that she was the only woman in the world who would actually listen to him, and not try something really stupid to prove her valor.

" Luna?"

" Yes?"

Her hand paused over his heart, her thumb, with it's short, rather bitten nail caressing his nipple.

" I...I should ask you some questions now."

" Only three." she smiled.

" Only three. Er..." he stilled her hand so that he could think. For some reason the most ridiculous question had popped into his mind, whether or not she had done this before. He had to remind himself she was not the seventeen year old schoolgirl of yesterday, but an honest a grown woman. She just seemed so vulnerable and innocent.

" If it were the full moon..and I was about to change, what would you do?"

Her thick, pale brows rose inquisitively.

" Do you mean, under everyday circumstances, or these?"

" Everyday. As in...if we shared close quarters."

" Oh, I see. Well, I would assume we had taken precautions before hand, and had either a cage for you, or a place for me. I would stay as far away as possible until it was over, then come out afterwards to help you with whatever you might need."

" No matter what?"

" Of course. A smart person does not let sentimentality weaken their logic, not when safety is an issue. I don't want to be hurt, and I would feel dreadful for you if soemthing happened, because you would feel all guilty even though it was my fault..." she frowned a little as if making sure she had said that the right way.

He sighed with relief.

''' And?" she prompted.

" And what?"

" Two more questions?"

" Oh...What are your hobbies? "

" Reading, writing my magazine of course. I collect things too, mostly the same things Daddy collected; rare insects, magical objects, the sort. And I study the dark arts and their defenses in my spare time, duel a little still, as well. And I paint, go fishing, build little things. Grow a garden...lots of things. One more question."

He searched around in his mind for a third question that was not too serious, and not too silly. The one that slipped out was neither, but it made her laugh.

" D'you want to get in the bed?"

" Of course. But not...without this." she pulled the blanket free, and wrapped it about her body before he could catch it.

" Now what am I supposed to do?" he asked.

" Come to me." she beckoned from the edge of the bed. He blushed.

" I don't think that is such a good idea, not at first. I haven't had a pretty life."

" Here, perhaps this will help." she stood in the middle of the mattress, and with a shy look toward him, let the blanket fall away. The first glimpse he had taken of her, he had not paused to gaze, and had only taken in the generality of her nakedness Now she was all but posing before him.

Remus saw the truth of a body with no glamor charms. slightly heavy thighs, short calves, and the faint marks of all manner of skin blemishes no human is completely without. Her stomach was flat, but her waist was wide, with no hour-glass dip to accentuate her hips. The effect was not bad, but it fell miles short of the standard of beauty set forth by witch Weekly, and Glim-Glam magazines.

She bit her lip, unable to read his expression. She knew her faults honestly, not like some women, who either over-glorified themselves, or over criticized. She was glad enough with the flat stomach, irritated with the stubborn thighs and ambivalent about the breasts that chose to be pendulous and dark-tipped instead of high and pink. She had lovely arms though, long and slender; ending in graceful white hands. Her hair too, was not bad, even though it sometimes reminded her of the inside of a banana peel.

" Are you still breathing?" she asked at last. His face had turned rather pink.

" Oh...I'm sorry. Breathing. yes. I..."

" I really don't want you to say anything." she said. " I mean, even if you're sincere, it always sounds as though it's buying favors. You don't have to buy favors from me...Remus. You don't."

She smiled shyly at him.

With a nod, he stood from the sofa, and summoning his long-forgotten courage, he made the long trip across the tiny room, under her unblinking blue gaze. She was perfectly frank. Her eyes took all of him in at once, then settled right on what she was most curious about without the slightest embarrassment.

He could have been a bloody, pulpy mess for all she cared of his scars. She continued to stare unabashed at his growing erection, her cheeks finally growing slightly pink, the closer he drew.

" Isn't it big?" she asked, concerned, after he had joined her in the bed.

" Umm...I don't think so." he replied, not sure if she blamed him or not. He was drawing some rather interesting conclusions about the late, great Ingle Whitewood.

" Have you ever had Wigmumps? I read in Fern Rudgilly's Magical Medical Encyclopedia that men who have Wigmumps swell up--" she held her hands up to indicate a preposterous size," and the swelling never goes completely away."

" No...I think everything is normal." he said uncomfortably.

" Oh good! Because if you've had them, you can carry them for thirty years, and I could catch them too...that happens a lot. Do you know what happens to women who have them? They get very fat and break out in purple stripes."

" Stripes?" he was losing his enthusiasm.

" Yes. Vertical stripes. But that's nothing like catching Miffles. I read that Miffles are actually little worms with teeth all along their body, and they eat right into the---"

He lay a hand over her mouth, gently.

" Do you have Miffles?" he asked.

She shook her head.

" Me either. So let's not think of them.Or Wigmumps. Or anything else of that nature." he removed his hand and replaced it with his lips.

" I like your legs." she said instantly.

" My legs. "

" Ahum. Long and thin." her hand suddenly appeared on one, a little too high up, and he couldn't help but throw her backwards onto the bed.

" And your arms!" she said, in gasping surprise. Luna's hands were as busy as her thoughts, now on his hip, his side, his back, around his neck, into his hair, then back at his waist. She ran them upwards through the rather thick, still brown hair that carpeted his chest.

Remus suddenly realized that he himself had been idle, and tentatively reached out to touch her. It had been a long time, he realized, as he dared to cup one breast. It was soft and the nippled pricked his palm teasingly.

He decided on a taste, and found it sweet. She watched with a almost angelic adoration her face as he placed kisses at random, nuzzling into the soft skin as he explored. Her fingers, in turn were still roaming, and had traveled below the safety zone. Cautiously she touched him, and he tore his mouth from her breast to gaze at her, his grey eyes wide and rather feral.

" If you want to stop, say so now." he croaked.

" If I had wanted to stop, I would have said so then." she pointed to the couch with one hand, and continued her ministrations with the other.

Something like a growl sounded in his throat as he began to kiss her stomach pausing in his southward migration only long enough to jab his tongue into her naval. She convulsed on the bed.

" Remus! I...please?" she wasn't certain for what she was begging, but he grinned maliciously at her, before pressing his face to the blond triangle of hair tucked between her round thighs.

" Let me in...or I'll huff, and I'll puff..." he blew a little on her dampened skin," and blow your house down."

She giggled throatily, her legs opening for him. Well, obviously, here was yet another thing Ingle Whitewood had never tried, judging by how stiff she became, her hands clenching the covers.

" It won't hurt." he murmured.

" I...I know..." he could only barely hear her whisper.

" Here?" he asked, pressing his lips against the tender skin of her inner thigh.

" Yes."

" And here?"

" Oh...yes!"

" And perhaps...here?"

" Oh...oh...I.."

Satisfied, he began to lick at that spot, reminding himself of his canine side. The harder she whimpered, the more firmly and speedily he lapped until she came up off the bed,her muscles knotted, a tiny scream tearing from her throat.

He could feel the pleasure ripples as they subsided, and smiled smugly to himself, before traveling back to kiss her mouth. She let him, not in the least repulsed. In fact, she seemed quite eager, or maybe it was gratitude, he couldn't tell.

" That was amazing." she said.

" There's more..." he promised.

" Do you want me to...?

'' No. Not right now. I want you."

" I want you. For so long. Please?" her hand was back where it shouldn't be, urging him.

He took it, pressed a kiss to her palm, and then let it fall. His hands, so large and bony, fell to her hips, and explored them a moment, slipping underneath to cup her bottom before returning topside to fondle her more, making certain she was ready. She pressed her hips up towards him impatiently, and he took a great breath.

Luna herself expressed a breath, a ragged one, as he finally began to slide inside. She wouldn't have exaggerated and said it was better than she had imagined, but she would admit in relief that it was just as good as she had imagined. He was bigger than she had imagined, and after two years of widowhood, it was almost uncomfortable.

But he was gentle as a spring rain shower, and before she could believe what was happening they were completely joined, and he was grinning down at her cockily. The years seemed to have melted from his face with that grin, and she couldn't help but return it and grab his face for a kiss.

" Make love to me?" she asked.

" All night." he promised, and added softly to himself, " Every night, if you'll have me.

----

Afterwards, they lay mellow and jointless in the bed, and since neither of them was embarrassed or ashamed, and no one of their friends decided to burst in and say 'April Fools', they could now move onto considering a second try.

He fully intended to pull her back into his arms, and she fully intended to pretend to resist for a few seconds before giving in. He even went so far as to roll against her and press his lips to her ear, and she managed to drape one arm over his side and sigh before they both dozed off, never to wake in that room again.

----

Remus Lupin was a lonely, dejected werewolf. Some days he was quite good at it. But when he woke up that morning, it was from such a fantastic dream that he forgot to mope. He didn't even think to be abashed at himself for having dreamed of someone who was practically a stranger to himself; he was too busy being furious that it had been only a dream. In fact, that was so frustrating, that he balled up his fist and struck the bed beside him.

" Hey! OW!" a voice muffled by hair and covers yelped. Startled, he rolled out of the bed, catching his wand from the bedside table as he landed.

" Show yourself1" he demanded.

" I can't!" a voice protested.

" Why not?"

" Because...I'm naked and I really don't know where I am. Who is there?"

He swallowed.

" Re-Remus Lupin."

A blond head popped from under the covers faster than a snitch, and he was gazing into the wide, blue eyes of Luna Lovegood.

" Miss Lovegood!" he exclaimed, embarrassed.

" Mrs. Whitewood." she corrected automatically. " What are you doing here?"

" What are you doing here, you mean. This is my bedroom."

She blushed a pretty shade of rose pink.

" It is? How did I get here?"

" I...I don't recall. I was hoping you might remember something."

" Well, I was dreaming something. But...I don't believe it answers anything."

" Oh? And what were you dreaming?" he hoped that she would be as embarrassed as he, but she only tilted her head and smiled.

" I dreamed that you and I were locked in a room together, and made passionate love. What did you dream about?"

"Er..." he realized he was wearing just a pair of boxer shorts and she was staring at him with ill-disguised hunger. " I don't remember. Something about picnicking by the sea."

" Liar. " she said, gently. Her face was perfectly composed, but she plucked nervously at the sheets.

" All right, I dreamed the same thing."

" That's nice, isn't it?" she asked.

" Well...yes...but it doesn't explain how we got here, does it?"

" Nope."

" Don't you even care? I don't mind at all...don't think that." he knelt on the bed, and lowered the wand, which he had forgotten was still pointed at her. " But I don't like for things to happen without my knowledge."

Luna sat up and shook out her pale hair. He remembered last night, how it had felt brushing his skin. Or had it really brushed his skin?

" And I can't even remember if we really...well, you know." he rubbed his hair in agitation.

This was very strange.

" Well, I think I would know if we had." she commented at last.

" You do? I mean, did...?"

" No." she was so very nonchalant. " I think we just shared the bed."

" But how?"

" Well, I slept here, on this side, and you were sleeping there on that side. Then you hit me."

" No, I mean how did we come to be sharing the bed, and I did not hit you."

" Yes you did. See, I have a red place just here." before he could stop her, she flipped back the covers to reveal a fist sized red mark growing on her thigh. He swallowed, eyes bugged slightly outwards.

" Oh...er...I didn't mean to. It looks wonderful. I mean, no. The bruise looks awful. I...the leg. Your Leg...er..."

" What? My leg looks wonderful?"

" Yes." he croaked.

" Well, you know you can touch it anytime you like. I won't mind."

He almost reached for it, but stayed his hand just in time.

" I dreamed that you said you had always loved me."

" Did I say I left the order because of you?"

" Yes."

" Did you tell me your favorite colour was blue, and that you collect old wands?"

" Yes."

" I think we had the exact same dream."

" That's impossible."

" Oh, no it isn't!" she shook her head vehemently. " It happens all the time. Haven't you read Sir Yelton Byword's ''Predictica''? "

" No."

" Well, I have. And do you know what I think happened to us yesterday?"

" Er..no."

" It's rather obvious, we must have ingested some Veneficus Powder. It comes from the Magus Flower,a very rare plant that eats one of it's own young before erupting a spray of phosphorous powder. It causes people to translocate."

He smiled patiently. Maybe she was right. So what if the plant had been extinct for so long that it was now rumored to have been legend. He was about to concede that it was a possibility, and advance to the next step, which would be deciding what they wanted to do now, when he espied a yellow, floating sphere only inches behind her head.

" Look at that!" he exclaimed, pointing with his wand. She turned and took note of the bubble.

" What do you think?"

" Here, let me catch it." he motioned her to scoot over so that he could kneel in the warm place left by her body. He reached for the sphere, but as soon as his fingers touched it--

" Careful! It could be a Gelatinous Giramblenimp! " she warned.

--it exploded.

There was an enormous flash of light, accompanied by the small ' sqirnk' sound of a cork being removed from a bottle. A receipt fell into his hand.

Dear Customer,

We hope you enjoyed your Fuzzy Fantasy Frolic. You chose Category Romance/Scenario-romance/Rating Grown Up.

If you enjoyed this scenario, you might also enjoy Category-Romance/Scenario-Star-Crossed/ Rating-Very Grown-up.

Please visit us again,

Sincerely,

WWW

" What the...?"he peered closer at the words.

Luna was reading over his shoulder, and giggled.

" I know what those are! I saw them in The Weasely's shop! Romance Daydreams!" she fell back laughing. " I told you the Weasley's were involved! Oh, you bought a romance?"

" I did not buy it!"

" And you dreamed about me! I thought you never even notice me!"

He blushed.

" Well...I noticed you a little."

" Just a little?"

" More than a little. Like I said, you were the closest I could get to the moon..." he didn't finish. She had flung herself into his arms, and was kissing his face fervently.

Suddenly George and Fred's words came drifting back to him,

" These are Feel Good Bars."

" ...with all the good stuff 'enhanced'"

" You are going to love us for it!"

" You'll be a new man!"

They had no idea.

------

If you enjoyed this Frolic, you might also enjoy:

" Waking Lupin"

" The Good Die Young"

or

" Oogah-Boogah"

Or then again, you might not. But just remember, it might one day be you who wakes up in a strange locked room with the character of your dreams.

Sincerely,

Anonymous