Disclaimer: I don't own them, I didn't create them, and I don't profit from them, but I do, however, find a great deal of amusement and enjoyment out of them.
Author's Note: This is a post-ep one-shot for "The Mummy in the Maze". This plot bunny took a hold of me and wouldn't let me go until I'd penned this. Enjoy.
"It completely defies logic, Bones, even a non-squint would agree with me," Booth had an expression on his face that was a mixture of curiosity and complete bewilderment; his fork had paused midway to his mouth and the bit of pie that perched on top of it was threatening to spill over back onto the plate. He had asked her to tell him where in the world she'd hidden her very large gun underneath her very snug and very sexy Wonder Woman costume; not that he'd mentioned the snug or sexy part, but he was well aware that there wasn't much room in that thing for her to breathe let alone hide a gun of that caliber without him noticing. Because he had definitely noticed every curve and nuance of her body and he would have definitely noticed a bulge that didn't belong to her.
"Well that's where I put it," There wouldn't really have been any other place to put it; clearly even Booth could see that. A smirk crossed Brennan's face; maybe that was the problem, the way he kept averting his gaze he probably wouldn't have noticed where she'd been hiding her gun. Clearly her Wonder Woman costume was sexually alluring; she was aware of that, but she hadn't completely anticipated what sort of effect that might have on her partner and she was surprisingly pleased about it.
"I'm just saying, Bones, the gun's pretty big, and that outfit...isn't," Booth wasn't sure if it was polite to gesture at her chest or not, but it was difficult to ignore the way her breasts were practically spilling out of her costume. And they're just begging to be touched by me. Booth mentally chastised himself; he knew if he fixated on just how sexy his partner was that his mind would start running off into places that it wasn't allowed to go; at least not while he was sitting across from her at the Royal Diner. Admit it Seeley, you've had fantasies about her that weren't this good. If he could have, he would have taken his mind out back and beaten the crap out of it just then.
"It's roomier than it looks," Brennan had finished off her pie and had her fingers curled around a cup of coffee as she studied her partner from across the table. He was clearly having trouble wrapping his mind around her claim that she'd simply put the gun down the front of her costume; she'd had the safety on so she hadn't been in any danger, but it was evident that the idea of it bothered him.
"Roomier than it looks," Booth's voice was laced with doubt and he nearly snorted out his words. Roomy, my ass; there's barely just enough room in there for you, how in the hell could you fit a giant gun in there too? Wouldn't you like to know, Seeley? Why in the hell did she have to go and dress up as one of the sexiest super heroes in super hero history?
"How does Clark Kent keep his Superman costume hidden underneath his clothes, wouldn't the cape get in the way?" Brennan had been pondering this little tidbit for a while; ever since she'd drawn the analogy about Wonder Woman and Clark Kent having a really bad date that is. And even though she'd backpedaled at the analogy, the idea of being on a date with Booth was certainly not a new one to her; it was just usually entertained when she was home alone and feeling particularly lonely. Liar. Ok, so she sometimes thought about it when she was working late at night alone in her office. Who are you kidding, Tempe? You've thought about more than just being on a simple date with Booth while you've been working a case. Ok, so she definitely appreciated the way his musculature was very well formed and it naturally caused her to consider how he might perform in a sexual encounter; especially since Angela had been planting the idea in her head since she'd met him.
"He doesn't," Booth let out a soft chuckle as he took the last bite of his pie, "Superman isn't real and neither is Clark Kent, so he doesn't need to hide it." He seemed pretty pleased with himself that he'd used squinty logic to prove his point. Maybe Bones was right; maybe he should wear a lab coat at all times.
"I know that, but if he was real, don't you think it would be pretty difficult to hide that costume underneath his regular clothes?" Brennan took another sip of her coffee and as she did she took the opportunity to study Booth's features, taking note of how brown his eyes were and how much his lips made her wonder what they might feel like against her own. Rational thoughts! I am a scientist; I need to remain detached and neutral. Thinking about how perfect Booth's lips are is not helping.
"No more difficult that you hiding a gun in your..." Booth helplessly gestured at her chest again trying very hard to not stare at how the perfect roundness of her breasts was emphasized by the form-fitting top of her costume; almost beckoning him to come over and get better acquainted. He blinked. Hard. Get a grip Seeley, you cannot think about your partner like this no matter how much of her that damn costume shows off, and please don't think about the fact that you touched her thighs earlier. Shit. I told you not to think about that because bad things are going to happen if you do that here.
"I told you where I put it," She'd clearly explained it to Booth and she wasn't sure why he didn't believe her, "Do I need to give you a demonstration?" She was prepared to do so to prove her point; scientifically of course.
Booth felt his throat constrict, "No." He answered too quickly and perhaps too forcefully; if she were to give a demonstration there was no telling what his reaction might be. Oh, you know what your reaction would be and then she would just use that gun on you.
Brennan narrowed her gaze at him, "Are you feeling ok?" The evening had been difficult; Booth had killed a man and that never got easy, and she had accidentally shot him. True it was only a flesh wound, but still, it had to hurt. I think I'd be a whole lot more upset if Booth had accidentally shot me; wounded or not, the man is absolutely sexy.
"Yeah, I think I just probably ate my burger too fast," Booth knew he was a liar, he just hoped Bones didn't pick up on that. A burger followed by a pie for desert wasn't out of the ordinary for him at the Royal Diner, but then again, this wasn't exactly a typical night. And Bones most definitely didn't look typical. How could she sit there acting as if she didn't look like a sex kitten? Whoa, hold on there Seeley. Wait, don't think about horse y terms. Shit. Ok, we are definitely in the gutter now, no hope for getting out anytime soon.
"I still think you should look at the merits of becoming a vegetarian, Booth, there aren't as many digestive issues," Brennan had done her research and she was definitely pleased with her own choice. Of course finding out how pigs were slaughtered was a very compelling reason to become one. Maybe it's not the burger he has the problem with; the man has been looking at you like he's starving, Tempe.
Thankfully, Booth had enough to cover the bill in his wallet and as he dropped the bills on the table, he glanced over at Bones hoping to hell that he did not have a single indication of the lust he was feeling on his face, "Let me give you a lift home," His smile felt genuine, "That is of course unless your invisible plane is parked outside."
Brennan rolled her eyes at him and let out a soft giggle, "Her invisible plane isn't real." She appreciated the offer to let him drive he home; at other times she might not, but it had been a long night and as much as she loved dressing up as Wonder Woman, all Dr. Brennan wanted was to get out of this costume and take a shower to get rid of some of the grit of the case. Are you sure it's not because you want to be alone with your fantasies about Booth being Superman to your Wonder Woman?
"How do you know it's not real; it's invisible?" Booth winked at her just then and let out a chuckle of his own as he stood up and gestured for her to follow. Despite being shot by her; or as she claimed – winged because of the ricochet off of her 'Amazonian' bracelets, he'd had a really good time fighting crime with her and in the back of his mind he almost felt like this was an episode of the Super Friends and they were on their way back to the Justice League.
As she walked out onto the sidewalk in front of the diner, she glanced over her shoulder at Booth, "They are just comic book heroes." She wasn't about to say that Wonder Woman in particular had provided her a measure of inspiration and courage to grow up and be proud of being a strong intelligent woman who could take care of herself. Or say anything about the fact that you want to use your Lasso of Truth to make Booth tell you how he feels about you; biologically or otherwise.
Booth casually slung his arm over her shoulder as they walked towards his SUV, "Comic book heroes or not, everyone has a favorite." Ok, Seeley, do not think about just how soft and smooth her skin feels and whatever you do, do not look down the front of her... You did it, didn't you; you just stole a look at your partners very perfectly formed breasts didn't you?
"So who was your favorite?" Brennan stopped in front of the passenger door of the SUV and turned around to face him. She wasn't completely oblivious to the fact that he'd been alternately staring and averting his glance from her and she suspected that Wonder Woman might just be an idealized iconic fantasy. Be honest with yourself, Tempe, you just want to know if he finds you to be an idealized fantasy; iconic costume or not.
"Wonder Woman," The words were out before Booth could stop them long enough to process any implications they might have and he found his eyes locking with hers in that moment and tangible or not he could feel electricity surging between them. Well if she didn't know you were turned on before, she sure as hell is going to know you are now.
Brennan swallowed hard and felt a fluttering sensation deep I the pit of her stomach that no amount of rational thought could disperse, "I always sort of had a thing for Superman." Why did you just tell him that? Booth is your partner, Tempe; this is definitely not one of those times to give in to those biological urges. Shut up! Maybe it is, maybe I want to! Rational thoughts. You are a scientist. You can be objective. Ok, you'd be far more objective if Booth was standing about three miles away.
Booth did not know what possessed him, but he leaned in and his lips seemed to find hers of their own accord. Oh, hell, I'm kissing Bones...and Hallelujah she's kissing me back.
What the hell are you doing, Tempe? I'm kissing Booth, what do you think I'm doing? And those lips of his are far better than I'd imagined. I just need to encourage him so he knows that I really do want this; that I really do want him. Brennan hooked his leg with her boot, pulling him closer and eliciting a soft groan against her mouth.
I'm touching her thigh, those soft silky smooth thighs. I want her; I want her right now, right here. Wake up, Seeley, think about where here is. You might just want to rethink that. Booth managed to pull himself out of his reverie, "We should get out of here." Oh, how he wanted to get out of here so he could get her out of that.
"Ok," There was not a single rational thought filtering through Brennan's mind just then and even as she managed to climb into the passenger seat and fasten her seatbelt, she still couldn't form a rational or logical argument to not resume what she and Booth had started, although she was trying because the lack of control she exhibited on a public sidewalk was very disturbing somewhere deep down. Admit it, Tempe, just for once in your life, you want to toss reason and logic out the window and let wanton and lusty take over. What perfect opportunity to do to your partner what you've been fantasizing about for months; years really.
Booth was sure that was the fastest he'd ever gotten to Bones' apartment without turning on the siren and lights; he'd briefly considered utilizing them, but for some reason he was sure it would break whatever spell or mood had descended upon them back there in front of the Royal Diner. Don't say anything, she might change her mind, she might still kick your ass, and don't forget about that giant gun of hers.
There was the briefest of hesitations as Brennan unlocked the door to her apartment. What if Booth thinks that was a mistake? What if he's changed his mind? Have a made a complete fool out of myself?
She needn't have worried because as soon as the door was closed they seemed to be pulled together with such a force that neither one of them could deny the attraction if they wanted to.
It was quite a while later and a haphazard trail of clothing led a path from the front door down the hallway to Brennan's bedroom. A very sated pair lay tangled up underneath the comforter on Brennan's bed.
Brennan traced an invisible pattern against Booth's chest, "I think it was rather fitting that you were wearing a Superman t-shirt underneath that costume of yours." He really was her Superman; as much as she claimed to be self-sufficient, he'd saved her life on a number of occasions and she was grateful.
Booth's fingers toyed with the crown still fixed in Bones' hair; it was the only part of her costume that hadn't been flung or yanked off in their haste to come together and for some reason he found it endearing, "Wonder Woman doesn't have anything on you."
Brennan smiled and tugged the crown out of her hair, taking a brief look at it before tossing it aimlessly to the floor, "She's just a comic book character, Booth." Of course, she was a fun character to dress up as and she was sure she would probably don her costume again next year.
Booth grinned at her, sliding his fingers into her hair and leaning in for a soft kiss before pulling away and whispering, "Yeah, but you're real, and the real thing is far better than any fantasy, Bones."
The End