Summary: Sirius is bored waiting for James to come home from work one day. The only solution is to poke Lily.

Disclaimer: I don't own this.

Threatening a Wall

a Siriusly Klutzy story

A very pregnant Lily was sitting in her living room going through a box of pictures that she collected from her parents house a few months prior. Sirius was sitting in a chair on the other side of the room, waiting for James to come home from work. And he was bored.

After about three minutes of watching Lily sort through the pictures, he moved over to help her.

"Hey Lily," he said, plopping down next to her. "What are you doing?"

Lily smiled. "Looking through some old photos from when I was younger."

"Is that you? With the freckles?" he asked, holding up a photo of a small red-haired child who was poking a kitten in the stomach. Behind her was her mother and next to her, her sister.

"Yeah, that was our cat Pumpkin."

Sirius snorted. "Original."

"What about this one?" he asked a few minutes later.

In his hand was a picture of Lily. Her hair was a mess and she had lipstick trailing down from her lips to her chin. She was standing in her mother's high heels and a shirt that was too big.

"'Tunia did that one to me," she said with a crinkled nose.

"Didn't James do the same thing?" Sirius asked with a grin.

"What? Wear my mother's clothes?"

"No, make you look like that one night." She looked at him oddly. He rolled his eyes. "Messy hair, smeared lipstick. Come on, Lily, I know enough to know that this is a post-sex picture."

"SIRIUS! I was eight!"

"Sure you were."

Lily snatched the picture back from him and threw it in the box.

"No more pictures for you," she said and stuck out her tongue.

Lily continued looking through the pictures when she received a small poke in her stomach.

"Sirius, what was that for?" She dropped three pictures in the box, all of which were her and Petunia in the garden.

"Think he'll poke me back?" Sirius asked, hopeful.

"Probably not."

"I bet he will."

Sirius poked her again. When nothing happened except a dangerous fire lighting in Lily's eye, Sirius leaned in to speak to her tummy.

"Hi, Harry. It's Uncle Sirius here. Just letting you know that if you don't poke me back any time soon, your mother is going to knock me upside the head!"

Lily smiled but still shielded her stomach from the wrath of Sirius's index finger.

"Quit poking Harry!"

Sirius poked him again.

"I think it's just his elbow. He'll be fine."

Poke.

"How would you know if it's an elbow. It's probably his head!"

Sirius smiled and poked again.

"Sirius, I swear to God, if my child comes out with finger-sized indents in his head I'm going to make sure you have hammer-sized ones!"

Sirius looked at her curiously for a moment before, "What's a hammer?"

"A big heavy, metal, muggle object that we use for bashing in heads," Lily replied with a grin. What Lily conveniently forgot to mention that they were the heads of nails, but Sirius needn't know that.

Sirius semi-recoiled for a minute before...

Poke.

"SIRIUS!"

"WHAT? He likes it, Lils. Don't worry. He's laughing. Remember, Lily? I'm poking his funny bone."

"He most certainly is not! Stop poking my baby!"

The fireplace turned green for a moment and out walked James Potter.

Poke.

"Sirius, if I weren't pregnant right now I would rip out your hair!"

"No, no you wouldn't, Lily. I'd look ridiculous bald."

"Yeah you would," James commented. He dropped his cloak onto the chair and knelt down next to his wife. He kissed her on the cheek. "Why are you ripping out Sirius's hair?"

"He's poking Harry!"

"He'll be fine! He's tough, like a Potter man should be."

"Oh Merlin," Lily said.

She stood up and levitated her box of pictures to the kitchen, currently the sanest place in the house.

o

The next night at dinner, Sirius was over. James had water boiling on the stove top and Lily was sitting at the table reading the Daily Prophet when she felt a jab in her side. She looked down at her stomach. Nothing. A couple more jabs came before she realized that it was Harry kicking.

"Oh, Harry," Lily said with a laugh.

"What?" James and Sirius asked.

"Remember what you said about him poking back?"

Sirius grinned.

A/n: 28 down, 2 to go. So I'm guessing I'm going to reach my goal knock on wood by the end of the year as I only have two left. If I do, it'll be anti-climactic so I'll probably up it or something. I don't know.

Anyway, talking about the fanfic here, I hope you guys liked it. I love prego-Lily fics.

Thanks for reading!!! And reviews make the world of fanfiction go round! Or at least, they make me happy!

Much love and pie, or whatever you want. We like options!

Siriusly Klutzy