I have no excuse.

Doesn't keep me from blaming Dolphin River, however. She wanted Bya/fem!Ichi, I apparently wanted insanity, and so you get this... semicrack thing, that's definitely not Bya/fem!Ichi.

Disclaimer: Bleach isn't mine. The insanity is.

Stockholm Syndrome

-

The second time they met was on Sokyoku Hill.

Ichigo hadn't actually noticed Aizen's companions in her rush to keep Renji and Rukia from dying messily.

After the initial rush, she still hadn't noticed them, sick with the effort it took to listen to what the madman said and not fall into unconsciousness like her body so dearly wanted to.

The only think she noticed was "Gin's" blade as it sped through the air, aiming to skewer the friend she had faced death several times to save.

-

The second time they spoke was in Las Noches.

"Fucking bitch."

Ichigo stilled, halting her struggles against the reishi bonds that held her, hardly allowing her room to breathe. She wasn't sure why they hadn't just killed her.

Her head snapped around as Grimmjow's fist impacted upon her cheek, and she tasted blood.

"What's wrong, Grimmjow?" she hissed, smiling despite the pain, which was nothing to what had become routine. "Sour? Can the kitty not take getting his ass kicked by a girl?"

The second punch would have knocked her to the ground had it not been for Ulquiorra holding her upright, and Ichigo thought she felt bone crack. She spat out a mouthful of blood and saliva, still smirking, but was interrupted before she could taunt the Sexta Espada further.

"Now, now, Grimmjow," a voice broke in, falsely cheerful and mocking. "Ya're hurting her. That ain't nice, ya know."

Twisting to take full advantage of what mobility was left to her, Ichigo turned to see who was speaking and saw silver hair and that wide, shallow smile that reminded her uncomfortably of a snake.

"Ichimaru…"

The former captain turned the false smile on her, and she felt her skin crawl.

"Aizen-sama said for the prisoner ta be given inta my custody, so lay off her, Grimmjow."

Ulquiorra handed over control of the reishi rope after a short exchange, and Ichimaru tugged on it sharply, making her jerk like a dog on a too-short leash. The captain patted her on the head, completing the picture.

"Shit head." Ichigo tried to get her head away from his hand, but he only laughed.

"Ichi-chan, that's mean." Ichimaru somehow manipulated the bonds so that he was half carrying her before trotting off, not even bothering with shunpo. Ichigo wished she could duck her head in embarrassment at the picture they must have made, but doing so would probably have her head in his armpit. "Don' call me shit head. Call me Gin. Rangiku-chan always did."

-

The second time she tried to escape, he didn't quite sulk.

"Ichi-chan! How could you!"

Gin had gone far past the petting stage and was outright wallowing on top of her. Shamelessly, at that. It was annoying (which he knew) and embarrassing (the same). She felt her face heating at Aizen's amused smile.

"Ichimaru, get off of me," she muttered, twitching before she swatted away a hand that was getting for too close to her breasts for comfort, only to squeak as the other one evaded her notice long enough to smack soundly on her ass. "Ow!"

The silver-haired ex-captain snickered, pinning her down with his weight and grinning down at her.

"Gin, as amusing as you are to watch, I would think you should take your affections into your room."

Who would have thought she would ever think of Aizen Sosuke as her savior? Gin pouted but got off, whining, "I warn't going ta do anything, Aizen-sama…"

It hadn't seemed that way to Ichigo. Her father would have died if he had known anything of what happened when Gin got into one of his more 'playful' moods. Nothing too untoward, thankfully, but the ex-captain got more and more daring every day.

"Be that as it may, Gin," Aizen countered candidly, "there will be a meeting of the Espada in an hour, and I would prefer not to have to explain the smell."

Mortified, she closed her eyes as Gin began to laugh.

Damn him.

Ichigo finally had a personal reason to kill Aizen Sosuke.

-

The second time they kissed, she didn't immediately pull away.

Granted, she really didn't have much of a choice in the matter.

At her back was the cold hard wall, to her front a not-so cold or hard man. Not to mention she was a little dazed, since Gin had decided to play Dancer Girl with her as the girl and she was still dizzy.

The fucktard was probably screwing with her head with the intention of screwing with her body.

But Ichigo was just a little out of it, and she couldn't muster the strength to push him away.

One of her arms dropped limply to her side as he let go of it, pulling away himself and tracing her jaw, still with that ever-present demented grin. "Ya know, Ichi-chan?" He poked her breasts, bringing her to a firmer awareness, though intentionally or not she couldn't guess. "Ya ain't got nearly the rack Rangiku-chan did."

Her face flushed, and Gin was lucky he caught her hand again, because she was going to bitch-slap the hell out of him.

"But ya know," he continued, pouting at her glare. "I think ya're prettier than Rangiku-chan."

Ichigo's jaw dropped in surprise, and Gin took advantage of the opening to make their third a French kiss.

-

The second time Las Noches was invaded, no one was left behind.

Of course, that didn't mean no one followed.

"Ichi-chan, ya abandoned me!"

She jumped so badly she dropped her books and wheeled around. "Ichimaru?"

Gin crossed his arms, pouting at her and not even offering to help gather her books. "That's not fair, Ichi-chan. I came all this way an' ya still won't call me Gin." He kicked aimlessly at the concrete.

Twitching, Ichigo ducked down to pick up her books, seized the sleeve of his shihakusho and dragged him out of the street.

"An alley, Ichi-chan? Are ya going to rape me?"

She moved to smack him, but he was faster than her human body could manage, catching it and slipping her into the sort of embrace that would have her killed, if not by the Gotei 13 for treason then by her father. The arm around her waist was strong enough that she couldn't wiggle free, so she head-butted his chest, garnering no response but a chuckle.

"I'm going to kill you," corrected Ichigo darkly, ignoring how the ex-captain's smile took on an even greater amusement. "What do you think you're doing, coming after me?"

"Aw…" He sounded hurt, and she almost felt guilty, before the hand on her back began to slip southward. To preempt the grope she knew was coming, Ichigo twisted around and bit down hard on the ex-captain's shoulder. He yelped. "Ichi-chan, I didn't know ya loved me so much!"

Ichigo blanched, and a second later fell tumbling to the ground with Gin on top of her.

Of course a freak like Ichimaru Gin would think of biting as a sign of affection.

Damn, but the impact of hitting the ground so hard must have jarred her brain, because - because -

Because there was no way she was liking Gin kissing her like this.

-

The second time Gin visited her in Karakura, Ichigo cursed to herself for not stopping him as he got more and more 'playful.'

Stockholm Syndrome was a bitch.

And so am I. Heh. Gin/fem!Ichi. I need to lay off the coffee before bed...