DISCLAIMER: All proceeds and rights belong to JK Rowling and her affiliates.

WARNING: Very slashy interlude coming up.

Sirius's Problem

By

Romantic Idiot

Sirius Black sat enclosed in his bed curtains, concentrating very hard on not thinking about Remus, who was presently half dressed and thumping around the dorm room looking for his shirt. The problem was that Sirius Black wasn't very good at concentrating, and his thoughts kept traitorously floating back to the thought of Remus's toned chest, and arms, and the damp golden locks of his hair that fell into his eyes when it was wet.

This was why Sirius was having a bit of an – erm – problem at the moment. A problem that involved a very intense desire to tear open the curtains and throw Remus against the nearest bed (no matter that it was James's) with intentions of shagging him senseless.

And this –ahem- problem, was causing him no small amount of discomfort as he realised that he wasn't going to have time to deal with it, and he had to put in an appearance at Transfiguration in about five minutes. With a silent groan of frustration, he prayed to Merlin that Remus had found his shirt and was no longer running around playing at being a temptation, and cautiously opened his curtains, his eyes clenched closed just in case. He pried one open, and the other soon followed it as it found Remus calmly sitting on his bed rearranging his book bag.

"Oh, there you are, Sirius," he said mildly, looking up momentarily. "We better get going. You ready?"

Ready! Sirius's mind cried, of course I'm sodding ready.

Not that kind of ready, the logical part of Sirius interrupted, and he mentally hit himself over the head. He was not going to get through this day if he kept supplying himself with unhelpful comments like that.

"Nng, uh huh," he muttered out loud, and clumsily made a grab for his book bag. He managed to hook it over his forearm, and halfway down the stairs rearranged it so it was slung over his shoulder instead.

At least until he caught sight of Remus's arse clad tightly in jeans, making its casual way down the stairs in front of him, and his problem became even worse.

Dear Merlin and Sweet Nimue, he thought in anguish, just let me get through the day.

At last the stairs were over with, but then they were walking side by side down the hallway, with their hips bumping together and Sirius was very worried that he might come right there in the hallway. He gritted his teeth and thought very hard about McGonogal naked. That helped a little, until they got to class, and Remus sat down next to him, their arms brushing as they reached for their books.

Sirius gave a tiny yelp as Remus's leg brushed against his, and Remus looked at him in concern.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yes!" Sirius exclaimed, wishing Remus would remove his gaze, because all Sirius could think of was how those eyes would look staring up at him, dark with passion.

"All right," Remus said, looking unconvinced, and turned back to trying to turn his feather into a hat.

All right, Black, Sirius said to himself. You've got to stop this. You've just got to survive Transfiguration and Defence Against the Dark Arts, then you can skip lunch and go to the dorm.

With this mandate in mind, Sirius applied himself wholeheartedly to his feather, and felt his need lessening a little as McGonogall patrolled the room, leaning over him every so often to inspect his work.

He was doing well until Defence, where they were practising stunning charms, which included a lot of people falling on top of other people. Naturally, Merlin and Nimue both hated Sirius, because they paired him with Remus, who was naturally gifted at stunning, and had Sirius falling into Remus's arms every few minutes, which really did nothing to help his problem.

Finally it was Sirius's turn to try stunning Remus, and he felt quite relieved for once that Remus had such amazing reflexes, because there was very little chance of him stunning Remus. Well, he thought so, anyway, until Remus was laughing at James and Lily, and Sirius got in a lucky shot, and Remus pitched forward into him, a surprised look on his face.

Sirius was caught off guard and they stumbled back against a wall piled with pillows, and lay there for a moment, immobilised by shock.

"Er … good shot," Remus said finally, squirming to find a way up.

The feeling of Remus's body moving against his was almost too much for Sirius and he let out a low groan and arched his back, desperately eager for more friction. Remus pulled back, startled, and Sirius scrambled through the fog of his arousal, to pull his mind back together and stop the urgent signals his body was sending to thrust up hard against Remus.

"Er … ow, my back?" Sirius covered awkwardly, and Remus's face cleared.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Sirius, did I hurt you?" he climbed off Sirius, and knelt before him, chewing his lip in anxiousness.

Move, move, move, move, Sirius urged Remus, don't sit there like that or I'm going to ravish you.

Remus gave him a strange look, and Sirius bit his cheek, hard.

Please don't let me have said that out loud, he prayed.

"Can't you move, then, Sirius?" Remus asked, "Shall I get Madame Pomfrey?"

"Uh …" Sirius muttered, struck with inspiration, "Yeah. Yeah, you'd better. Damn trick back of mine …"

"You've never mentioned it before," Remus said in concern. "How often does it play up?"

"Oh … oh, not … not often. Once before. When I was little. Fighting with Regulus. Um … so … Pomfrey?"

"Oh, of course!" Remus exclaimed, and leapt away, hastily explaining to the professor what had happened, and speeding out of the room.

Minutes later, Sirius was ensconced in a bed in the infirmary, Madame Pomfrey glaring sternly down at him.

"Sirius Black," she said imperiously. "You faked a back injury to get out of class, didn't you? There is absolutely nothing wrong with you besides laziness."

"Yes, Madame Pomfrey," Sirius said automatically, his mind busy figuring out whether she would think there was enough time left in the lesson to send him back or not.

"So – so he's all right?" Remus asked, sticking his head inside the curtains.

"Yes, Mr Lupin, your friend is perfectly fine," she told him, smiling at him, and then glaring back at Sirius. "I don't suppose there's any point sending you back to class, but I will be telling the headmaster, so you may expect a detention any day."

"Yes, Madame Pomfrey," he repeated, and thanked Merlin for his first stroke of luck today. "I'll – I'll just go now, shall I?"

"Yes," said Pomfrey, sighing heavily.

Sirius left the bed as sedately as he could, avoiding exhibiting his healthy back any more than was possible, and also favouring his still throbbing privates. He and Remus walked to the dorm in silence, stopping before they reached the portrait hole.

"Why'd you fake a back injury to get out of Defence, Sirius?" Remus asked him, eyes troubled and confused, and Sirius felt a real prat. He'd scared Remus.

"I'm sorry, Moony," he said quietly. "I just … couldn't stay there any more."

"Why?" Remus asked, stepping closer to him, and looking into his eyes. Sirius swallowed, and opened his mouth to speak, but Remus's book bag fell off his shoulder with a bang, and Remus bent to retrieve it. On his way back up, his elbow pushed hard against Sirius's crotch and he sucked in a deep breath before he could help it.

"I've got to go," he blurted out, and sped past Remus, through the portrait hole, up the stairs and deep under the covers of his bed, where his hand found the zip of his jeans and yanked it desperately down, undoing the button as an afterthought.

He bit his lip as his hand brushed against his painful erection, and slipped his fingers inside his boxers, sighing in relief as he finally found contact for his need. With a few quick, strong strokes, he was so close he could almost see stars, and almost didn't hear the dorm room door creak open, or hear the footsteps approaching his bed.

With a frustrated growl, and a quick yank that almost brought tears to his eyes, he threw the covers back and squeezed his eyes shut, hoping the thickness of the blanket would hide him.

A moment later, the curtains flew open and Remus stood there livid and confused.

"What the hell is the matter, Sirius?" he demanded.

"Nothing," Sirius muttered into his pillow, trying not to think how much he'd love to shag Remus while he was angry.

"It's not nothing, Sirius! You skipped your favourite class, and ran out on me, that's something."

"No, it's not," Sirius said desperately and curled himself into a ball. "Please, please, just go away."

"I won't," Remus said, sitting down squarely on the bed, so that Sirius rolled involuntarily towards him. As though Merlin and Nimue were having a particularly malicious day, Remus's hip was pressing hard against Sirius's definite problem, and Sirius was beginning to see stars again.

"Moony," Sirius gasped through gritted teeth. "Please, get off my fucking bed right this second or I swear you'll regret it."

"Sirius!" Remus exclaimed, "What -?" He leant further towards Sirius, his hip pressing harder than ever, and Sirius groaned involuntarily, convulsing at the contact. Suddenly a look of comprehension dawned on Remus's face and he gave a curious little thrust of his hip against Sirius's hardness. Sirius almost bit through his lip at the feeling, and Remus did it again.

"Oh, god, Remus, don't stop, for Merlin's sake, don't stop," he panted, lost now to thoughts of anything but how close he was.

Remus leant forward, braced himself against the bed, and gave a harder, more confident thrust of his hip, which brought him almost on top of Sirius. Sirius thrust up automatically, and the friction was enough.

He came hard, wide eyed and gasping, while Remus looked down at him, amber eyes intent and deep. Sirius collapsed against his pillow, trying to regain his breath and his sanity, while he felt light headed and marshmallowey.

"I'm sorry, Remus," he said finally, turning his head away.

"So am I, Sirius," Remus replied softly, and Sirius felt his world tremble. "Sorry that you didn't tell me earlier." He finished, and kissed Sirius hard, pressing himself down on top of him, so Sirius could feel the beginnings of Remus's own problem.

"Oh dear," Sirius said, suddenly light hearted. "You seem to have a problem there."

"Yeah," Remus said. "Quite."

AUTHOR'S NOTE

So is it really bad I came up with this while in my boyfriend's arms?

Hope you like it, anyway.

Liz.