Take

Part Two

Remember this name, never forget... The name of the god was Malpercio...
Malpercio sucked up the entire ocean, but choked and drowned in the very water he swallowed.
The whale, however, will always be with us...
It lives on in our hearts.
Close your eyes, and listen...
You can hear the whale's songs.
Even today...
The ocean will return someday...
Until then, the whale will be waiting. Waiting patiently.

The net strained under her bulk. Xelha eyed the men above her, watching their teamed efforts as closely as if their hands were coated with oil. But they did their job well, and lowered her safely into the tank, shouting to each other with each practiced movements. She shivered as warm water surged up over her skin; soon the nets loosened and she could maneuver in the tank on her own. Cheers sounded above her, tinny in the water. From the corner of her eyes she saw the workers climb down their ladders to gather and watch her. She floated and stared back at them, flicking her flippers occasionally. A variety of faces surrounded her, but his didn't seem to be in their ranks...

No, wait, there he was—? Ah, yes. He stood off to one side, slightly detached from the group. Solemn and alone.

It was almost strange, considering that he was the one who was sponsoring the aquarium. He wouldn't join in the camaraderie, and probably wouldn't thank them, either. He seemed too caught up in his own thoughts to remember to be polite. It was a pity; she saw him looking stormier than he had ever been before.

Oh, but what a joy when he had come to the sea that day, a team of men grouped behind him, scowling out across the lapping waves. She had been drifting aimlessly through the water when he arrived, waiting for someone to visit her lonely beach. Almost three years had passed since the ocean had returned.

Ever since people had found themselves floating in sea instead of sky, they had been developing new technology that would allow them to travel, and now the seas were littered with passenger ships and sail boats. Xelha, self-conscious of her new marine body, had been forced to hide in one of the less populated areas, a small cove off the coast of Mira.

Kalas often went there, too. Usually alone.

Yet he came to the shoreline one day with a group of men who were shouting something about finding the whale. Xelha had heard this, floating nearby. Her eyes had widened. Was Kalas there to finally get her?

She felt stiff at first, but she slowly paddled towards them. As she cut through the waves her heart beat deep in the cavern of her chest. She felt a shudder course through her body.

Xelha reached the shore with a shaky flip of her tail. What would Kalas think? Would he recognize her, after all that time? Did he realize what had happened to her? ...Did he even care?

Kalas had spotted her quickly; he was used to seeing her large body and shapeless black eyes after all his trips to the coastline. He called for the team of men, pointing at her. That's her. That's the one.

The men whistled and began untangling the threaded material that they had brought with them. Xelha watched the humans on shore, her gaze drifting between Kalas and the gang of men with their net.

Their net, which had brought her to the aquarium.

She stared up wistfully.

Their net, which shook in the water and was soon sliding up the side of the tank. Men stood around on the outside, shaking hands and clapping backs.

The job was done, and they had every right to congratulate each other. The tank — simply labeled "The Whale" — was the largest in the aquarium. Nearby smaller glasses brimming with colorful fish were displayed, and beside her was an empty tank that glowed with the light of yellow bulbs. The workers moved in the deep and dark aquarium, admiring their work. They would leave soon.

When the cheering died down and the crowds began to thin and disperse, he finally approached from the shadows. He stopped before her tank, his head down. He seemed to be studying "The Whale" name plate, but then he looked up, and she would have blushed if she could.He pulled out a rag that was tucked into his belt and wiped the sign in front of her tank. He gave her a look and began to slowly retreat into the shadows. The echo of a door shutting sounded through the room.

There were no lights in the aquarium, just the beams that lit up the tanks. Children ran by, staring in wonder, laughing, pointing at the smaller fish that whipped back and forth. Older people passed by shaking their heads in wonder, smiling vaguely. Occasionally some would linger in front of the tank of "The Whale" and look into her tired eyes.

She wanted to smile, to tell them, Yes, this was my sacrifice. The day passed slowly and all the lights went out.

The next day her water was lit up again with its warm white light and she swam lazy laps around the edges. The people came in to watch her, crowding around exclaiming at her tremendous size and blue-green color until outside the sun went down and the lights of her tank were snapped off. Xelha watched them woodenly. She closed her eyes and waited for the next day to come.

Night turned to day turned to night again and Xelha drifted along the bottom of her tank.

Each day felt like a dot of mold growing on her skin, growing slowly but surely. She felt strongly the passage of time. Each day dribbled and collected and grew into a week, the weeks piled and formed months, eventually there were enough heavy months to make up years. She drifted in time, marking her life only by the points of light when she saw Kalas.

He wandered past the different exhibitions, stopping every now and then to catch a glimpse of the glimmering forms of fish sliding through the water. Xelha hung limply in the center of her tank, as usual. She stared at him now with no fear or embarrassment; she had long since realized that he no longer knew her. He was living without her, growing older, moving on and possibly forgetting. It killed her, but at least she saw him.

She watched as he stood before her tank. He certainly had grown older. His hair was light and tousled and his mouth was firm and bitter; dark lines encircled his eyes. He stared at her as helplessly as she did at him.

Kalas... Do you...?

Kalas leaned in to turn off the bulbs of light that illuminated her tank. He sighed in the dim, empty room, and stood with his shoulders slumped before the tank. He stood for a long time. Soon he started mumbling to himself.

"Wanted to do something for her..."

He shuffled his feet slightly and studied the sign; she swam up to the side of the glass, straining to hear.

"She had to die for this, so that some big dumb fish could come back to life. I hate that things had to end this way. The only reason why I made this place was so that her life wouldn't go to waste."

He sighed.

"It's not like I have anything to do here anymore..."

He put a hand up to the glass.

"I just wanted to remember Xelha."

She slowly bumped her nose along the side of it.

"I want her back."

Xelha waited for Kalas to come the next day. Normally, a hired worker would come to feed her and the other sea animals, but when the people of Mira stopped patronizing of the aquarium soon the sponsor himself had been the only one to come. But that day Kalas didn't show up.

She waited, ignoring the stillness of the room. It was dark but she waited through the day and night.

He didn't show up the next day, either. Or the one after that.

Soon the stench of rotting fish began to fill the aquarium. Xelha became sick with hunger and repulsion. Down the aisle Pauly the Pollywhale grew limp.

Xelha sank to the bottom of her tank. She slowly closed her eyes.

When she opened them she found herself floating in the ocean, the sunlight above dazzling and the clouds climbing across the sky. She froze, barely breathing, drowning in the feeling of real sunlight on her skin and clean water sweeping up against her sides. Xelha flapped her arms and floated through the water.

The water splashed over her skin as though over smooth rock. She delighted in it, pushing memories of the stinking, sagging days in the black aquarium away. She was free now, to go where she wanted and live where she felt like it.

Her mighty fins drove the water away and she shot deep into the ocean, spinning like a bullet, feeling the glorious water glide over her. Tiny bubbles streamed behind her and the glow of the sun lit up the water. Here was the gift of life, of a young, healthy body and freedom.

But as she flew through the sea she began to realize that she had been given this life only after having died.

At this thought her heart grew heavy. Kalas hadn't returned. He was an old man. He would be dying soon, if he hadn't already.

And here she was, immortal.

Xelha closed her eyes and pumped her fins, rushing to feel the burn of exertion in her body.

She would live forever and he would die.

Her muscles drove harder, clenched with pain.

She would keep going forever. Even if she tried to kill herself, she would keep coming back.

The horizon was so far away.

Her muscles began to ache, clenching with each stroke of her powerful arms. The water rocketed behind her; she didn't know where her nose was pointed but she was racing to get away, racing into infinity.

He would die.

The pain burnt the fibers of her body and slammed her bones. With one last push she flew in a white flash and was paralyzed. The ocean stretched all around her, and as she lay panting, pain shooting through her limbs, she stared at the horizon. She tried to move but was unable to. The waves splashed at her sides.

Kalas would die.

She blinked painfully at the sky.

Why?

The wind swept sprays of water over her face. She blinked as the droplets showered her. Clouds dance by above, and she noticed the sun moving slowly across the sky. She breathed out, feeling water creep over the top of her skin.

She sank down into the ocean, surrounded by the salty water that she had given her life for. She wondered if she was dead. If this was the afterlife.

Sunlight faded as she sank into the cool depths of the ocean. Her body drifted slowly, another cloud in another sky, trailing the endless depths, a wandering darkness.

Another millennium seemed to pass as she lurked beneath the waters. Xelha was numb; her fins wouldn't move and her snout felt cold. She wondered if she was dying again.

Even if she died, she would continue living.

So she drifted. Sand scooted slowly. A school of fish glided by and water pushed against her. Currents moved slowly, rocking back and forth.

She existed.

One day she lifted her head up and wondered what to do. She remembered that he was probably dead. Probably all of them were.

What to do?

She put her head back down and existed.

Eventually she moved her fins and pressed herself upward. She drifted slowly to the sky. It felt like it took years to reach the surface. When the water broke over her skin, she was amazed at the intensity of the sun. Looking around, she saw that she was nowhere.

Xelha began to swim in a random direction because somewhere, there had to be an end. The ocean couldn't go on forever there had to be a beach to rest on. She traveled for miles, and days passed, and she fed on small fish and plankton; she felt like a whale, she felt as though she fit into the role, and she swam toward land. Eventually a spot appeared on the horizon; the waves and her weak limbs carried her there. The spot grew into an island.

She coasted along the shoreline, watching the run of mountains go up and down as she sailed by. They were shrouded in mist, distant. A faint rainbow arched over the tops of them, fading in and out of the clouds.

Xelha realized that it was Anuenue. She knew that if she looked to the east she would find Diadem. To the north was Alfard. The last time she had visited the islands was years ago... Many years... perhaps forty or fifty. All those familiar landmarks and places would still exist, but the people would have all died. Everybody she knew, except Queen Corellia, would be gone. Xelha gazed out again at the cool peaks of the mountains of Anuenue. Somewhere beyond them lived another woman who had lived past her allotted lifespan. She wondered why anyone would ever make the choice to live forever.

I wouldn't care if I disappeared from this world. There's nothing for me here. What can I do, besides swimming and soaking in my memories?

I'm beginning to wonder at this exchange. I gave my human life to free the ocean and take on the form of the whale. Was it worth it?

Did I make the right choice? The people of Anuenue and Mira and Wazn can finally have something they long ago learned to live without, but is it fair?

Is it fair that I'm alive? Is it fair that I continue existing?

She drifted idly by the beach.

Xelha let the waves carry her across the sea. She hadn't moved a limb in weeks, and the tides had carried her away from Anuenue. She watched as the occasional sail boat skidded by, or as an ocean liner charged through the waves. She rolled on the ripples created.

She refused to eat and her body shriveled in the bright sun. Color drained from her world; the ocean that was once so fresh and blue took on a pale quality. Her skin was sinking into the crevices between her bones and she hardly cared. Soon she died.

Later on she died again.

Xelha despaired. Her world was her body. There was no escape, no matter where she swam or what she did. Alone, she could accomplish nothing. There was no happiness in idle exploration, no enthusiasm in the sighting of an island landscape.

On a silent drift past Diadem, she recalled a story told by an old woman there. How Malpercio, the evil god, had swallowed the ocean and left the earth barren. For a moment she reflected that it would have been nice if he really had.

Xelha wondered what would happen if she tried to take the ocean back. Would it also take her immortality?

Swallowing something as vast as the ocean was impossible. There was no way to do it, she was sure.

...Unless she used her infinite lifetimes. She would swallow the sea until she burst, and then recycle her body and continue her task. She could use forever taking back the right to die.

Xelha stared out at the ocean before her. The breaking waves that stretched to the bottom of the sky. It would take forever.

But if there were no ocean, there would be no way or reason for her to ever come back.

She sucked in an experimental stream through her teeth.

Another stream. She steeled her mind and sucked harder until the water began to whirlpool into her mouth. She opened her jaws and the water poured in.

Soon the sip had turned into an inundation of seawater. The fish around her were swept in and floating seaweed flailed as it passed by her teeth. She started choking. Her belly felt full, but she gasped and forced herself to drink more.

She was drowning — drowning, drowning, drowning — and she couldn't breathe. She was beginning to get dizzy. Water pushed against her belly, pooled in her lungs, pressed against her cavernous mouth. She kept drinking, swallowing deliriously.

Soon the water fought back and her throat swelled and she began to gag. She paused, fighting to keep it down. When the rush of fear and distress had passed, she parted her lips and drank more.

She felt sick. She felt more than sick; she felt as though her body would explode. Every organ was flooded with water. She drank until her eyes and nose and mouth burned. Her throat felt sore and raw. She gagged; it passed, and she continued. Water flowed into every part of her body.

There came a point where she couldn't force the muscles in her mouth to push the water down. Her body floated awkwardly in the Ocean and she gasped to fill her lungs with breath. She rolled in the sea, bloated, leaking water from her mouth and nose. She sloshed when she closed her mouth.

Drowning. This is what it felt like. This loose, cold, separated feeling. Like filling a pouch until it was ready to pop. Until her eyes were ready to bug out. Her whole body, going numb, losing feeling. She was dying.

She was bitter.

Xelha thought how cruel it was, in the game of give and take, to always take and never to give.

A/N: I finished! I don't remember why I wrote this, but I finished, and that's all that matters, right? I can at least say that writing this story was a wonderful experience.

By the way, don't you think that Sagi's experience with Greythornes in BKO sort of supports this story? Switching hearts and all that jazz? Don't you think? Lemme know... and lemme know what you think about the ending of this story. Thank you so very much for reading.