"Stupid, fraggin', pit-spawned, glitchy…"

Wheeljack paused outside the door and listened to the string of foul language drifting out of the human quarters. What in Cybertron's name was causing Carly so much grief? He opened the door and peeked inside.

Carly looked up from her position on the floor and scowled at the engineer and Wheeljack stared down at the young woman sprawled amidst what appeared to be the remains of a large chair.

"What?" Carly growled.

"Did the chair explode?"

"No, it didn't explode," she responded sarcastically. "I'm trying to put it together. Stupid instructions leave out half the steps and the other half are unintelligible. I'm about ready to throw the whole mess into the volcano." Then she sighed and ran a hand through her blonde hair. "But then I wouldn't have a gift for Spike. What a mess."

Wheeljack eyed the bits and pieces of the unassembled chair. "Perhaps I could help. What do you say?"

"Um, now that would be real nice of you but are you sure you can work with something so small? Not that you couldn't, I'm sure but well, I can do this, I think." She grimaced apologetically at the mech not wanting to imply that she was afraid or anything. Wheeljack's projects didn't always blow up. And there wasn't anything remotely explosive about the chair.

The engineer's ear panels flashed brightly. "There's nothing to worry about, Carly. I have all the necessary micro tools to do intricate work like this. See?" He held out his hand and his fingertips retracted to reveal all sorts of tools.

"I, uh, I see. Well, okay."

"Wonderful," he responded, rubbing his hands together as he stepped into the room.

Carly held out the instructions but Wheeljack scoffed and brushed them aside gently. "Don't need those, Carly. This is a very simple job. Just attach this piece here…uh, right here…hmmmmm, maybe here…"

Carly watched for a few minutes before stepping back into the fray. "Are you sure you don't need the instructions?"

Wheeljack looked at her, his panels a pale blue, his frustration under tight control. "No, no, I'm good. Yes, this is just a simple thing. This part lines up with that part and the screws go in here…" Suddenly the little screws and parts of chair flew apart in several different directions. Carly scurried to grab the tiny screws before they could roll under the couch. "Slag," Wheeljack whispered before gaining control. "Shall we try that again," he managed to say cheerfully.

"I guess, but I think I can do this myself…"

"No, no, I said I'd help and I will. Let me see those screws again."

She handed them over and he held them up to his optics. "Tiny little scraplets, aren't they?"

"Um, yes, they are," Carly answered.

"Perhaps we don't need them."

The woman frowned. "Now, 'Jack, I think we should use the parts provided. Warrantee an all."

Wheeljack waved his hand in dismissal. "I have this all figured out. Just watch."

Carly frowned slightly but didn't argue. Wheeljack carefully lined up the chair pieces, holding them in one hand. His other hand retracted and a small, nozzle appeared.

Carly's eyes widened. "Waitaminute…"

A small flame escaped from the nozzle and licked at the chair cushion. "Wheeljack!" Carly yelled but she was too late. With a fwoomp, the chair burst into flames. Wheeljack jumped back and tried to shake the melting plastic from his hand.

Carly buried her head in her hands and her shoulders shook while Wheeljack stared helplessly at the wad of goo adhered to the palm of his hand.

"I'm sorry, Carly."

Laughing helplessly, Carly could only wave her hands at the engineer. Finally, she got control and said, "You didn't use the screws. I won't be able to get that replaced now."

"Couldn't we say the screws were faulty?"

"You know, I'm almost sure the warrantee doesn't cover giant robots whether or not they use the screws." She paused and giggled. "I think we're definitely screwed."