Reasons

It seemed innocent enough in the beginning. Rose had mentioned that she'd never been hiking before and, of course me being me, I was convinced that it was my duty to rectify that.

So I brought her here- to Omega VII- a planet with one continent completely shrouded in trees and valleys and the perfect hiking trails. No people, no dangerous wild animals, just trees, plants, small lakes, and us. We'd been hiking for about a half an hour- sometimes climbing because she claimed that it was part of the experience, but mostly strolling hand in hand along the naturally carved out paths.

It was when we were a good twenty minutes from the TARDIS that she asked to stop and rest for a minute. There was an old, fallen tree just off the path and she led me over there. The diameter of the trunk was massive and I couldn't help but laugh when she had trouble hoisting herself up. But she managed- wobbly at first before she managed to steady herself. I hopped up next to her- my trainers weren't exactly designed for hiking.

And that was the stupid move that led us here. We were just sitting there, talking about everything and nothing and the woods and hiking and her mum and the places we had been and the places we were going. And, of course, I let slip a funny anecdote about the time I had been on Larotus and her face broke out into that beaming smile that always manages to warm my hearts. And I'm finding that this regeneration's Achilles' heal is her laugh, because once I've managed to make her laugh, I can't stop. And so I detailed to her every funny story about any planet that came to mind and I had her in stitches as she laughed and bumped my shoulder and claimed that I was pulling her leg. And I knew that the minute I turned and gave her the cheeky smile this body is so good at, she was going to smack me. And she did, hard enough in fact that I lost my balance on the tree trunk; the only thing that I could do was hop to the ground. She laughed harder at that and so I retaliated. Immediately my hands were at her sides because I know that that is where she is unbearably ticklish.

And that's when it happened, I think. Sometime between tickling her and her hands batting mine away, her smile had faltered and she was leaning forward. And that's how I know now that her lips are much softer than I ever imagined. They're warm and subtle, and right now they're teasing my lips with their presence.

Like I said, I'm really not sure how this happened. I said that it wasn't going to. That it couldn't. I have rules about such things.

But now her hands are roaming up my back and I almost regret that the true sensation is lost somewhere between all the layers of clothing. She's becoming bolder, growing past the shyness when I didn't pull away. She's pulling me closer, pressing me more firmly between her legs. I'm not touching her- I can't. My hands are resting on top of the decaying bark.

Maybe this should happen- it was almost inevitable. Maybe we came here for a reason. And maybe I'm just going insane, confused by the magnificent pressure of her lips against mine.

She shifts against me and I can't control the sigh that escapes my lips. So I reach for her hops, holding her body where it is. Her tongue is darting out, tasting me, caressing my lip but I don't let her in.

Because I know better. I know why I've always said that this won't happen with any of them. Because it can't. Because it shouldn't. Because I don't want them like that. Because it will just make it harder to say no.

Her hands are in my hair, tossing it, roaming through it, massaging the tense muscles. And then they're roaming across my jaw, cupping my cheek, and angling my face lower so she can switch her attention from my lower lip to my top.

And maybe this isn't so bad. Maybe I could learn to understand and even want Human intimacy. Maybe she could understand-

Suddenly she's grinding against me again, ignoring the strength of my grip, and I can't do anything but moan into the kiss. She's smiling against my lips as her tongue snakes passed. Then she's taking her time, driving me crazy as she explores and tastes very inch, every bit of flesh and teeth. And I find myself returning the attention, letting my tongue dance against hers and peak into her mouth.

And I want to hate myself, because I know better than to encourage her. I know that I'm toying with her feeling and leading her on. I know that this is wrong.

But I can't stop my hands from running up the sides of her body. I could feel her sigh against my lips as my hands grazed her breasts. And then my fingers were tangling themselves into her hair and pulling her to me, deepening the kiss.

And yet it feels so good. So much better than I ever imagined it would.

It's been a long time since I've reacted physically to a woman- a long time. And it's only taken a kiss and Rose's hands roaming over me to make me start feeling hard.

I should pull away. I should stop this before she notices, before she tries to push this further. I should, because I know that if she did, I wouldn't stop her.

And that's when her hands move lower, sliding over the lapels of my jacket and dipping under it. I can't help but suck in a breath as I realize what she's about to do.

And maybe I should let her do it. Maybe I'm blowing the consequences out of proportion. Maybe…

Logic finally wins out and I cup her cheek, letting myself suck on her lower lip for just a moment longer before I force myself to pull away from her. She's breathless as she bits her lip, eyes looking up at me beneath her long lashes. Her look's seductive and she's even a bit shy about it and I need to scold myself to keep from leaning in and kissing her again and letting her push this further.

I do know better. There's a reason why I said I would never become intimate with my companions. Just because I can't think of a single reason on the entire list doesn't mean I should just ignore them all.

She's resting her head against the crook of my neck. I almost missed the soft pressure of her lips brushing against my pulse. I rub her back, holding her to me, helping to keep her balance on the tree trunk.

I can only hope that she understands. That she knows that I don't do this with anyone, that I have reasons that I'll never tell her about. I hope she knows that this was a one time thing. It was an inevitability of time mixed with a delicate bit of friendly atmosphere.

That's all.

I step back, letting her hop off the tree trunk. We don't say anything as she slips her hand into mine. I squeeze it lightly. She'll want to talk as soon as we're back in the TARDIS or a couple of hours later while we're in the vortex. She's Human and if we don't "talk about it", it'll drive her mad.

That's reason number thirty-seven: Snogging and shagging inevitably lead to a very awkward conversation about all the reasons.

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This was basically a re-write of my creative writing final. Hope you all liked it! Cheers, JD