Disclaimer: I do not own Howl's Moving Castle.

Loves Burden

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Pain. That is all that was coursing through his body. Through every nerve, every blood vessel, in every cell in his being; pain was screaming at him. All the steps he took made him almost stop and curl into a ball in this always consuming pain; every breath, every exhale, every blink of an eye, made him want to scream in grief and agony.

Or that is what it felt like to him. Pain. But when he tried to explain it to Calcifer, he could not explain it. It was not a bad pain, but yet it did hurt. It coursed through his veins always pumping through him; he slowly learned to accept it but confusion came along with the acceptation. If only he could still not have a heart. If he did not he would not be in this predicament. He would not be able to feel anything again. No more pain, no more hatred, no more happiness, no more anything. But because of one person he did. She gave him a reason to be happy and also angry and all the other emotions. Because she gave him a will to live and a reason to be happy.

"Sophie…" Howl whispered. He closed his eyes and let the wind blow through his night sky hair. Or at least that is the color that Sophie said it was.

"The color of the sky at midnight." Sophie said dreamily as she rubbed her right thumb and forefinger on some of the hairs in front of Howl's face, the action made him want to sigh or moan in bliss but he kept them both at bay; in embarrassment of the impulse to do such a thing sprung on him and that he almost gave into the action. She had said that to him last week during their weekly picnic with The Witch of the Waste, or Wendy as Sophie called her, Markle, and Hein. 'Wendy' had fallen asleep and Hein and Markle were playing in the water, to cool off. That was also the day Howl started picking at Sophie, and dumped her into the lake, her new navy with ivory trimmed dress and all.

Howl chuckled to himself as he remembered his surprise when she had tackled him to the ground so hard she made him fall into the shallow water with her on top of him. They had started laughing at each other, but stopped once they fully realized how close they were. They gazed into each other's eyes, blue bore into brown as their faces became closer until they were just a breath away. Howl felt her breath upon his cheek, her chest against his, her legs against his; his own body singing in pleasure and shaking from wanting to be closer still.

But right at that moment Hein had run by splashing them and waking them from their almost lip lock.

"I-I-I n-need to go to the ba-bathroom." Sophie mumbled nervously as she got up quickly and ran to the castle door. Howl's gaze followed her and gasped to see that the ivory that went around her waist and sleeves were see through, the clothe hugging her as if a second skin.

Howl shook his head from his daydream and sighed. 'Now she will not even look at me.' He thought. He sighed again, coming from the very deepest part of his soul, and turned away from the lake to go back into his castle. But before he could take a step, he bumped into someone instead.

Howl reached out on reflex and caught them around the waist and brought the person up a little too fast to make a very feminine body come onto his. He looked down to see Sophie staring up at him, pink spread across her face in embarrassment.

"H-Howl…" Sophie gasped. Her hands had come up to his chest to try and catch herself. Their eyes atomically went towards each other. Howl could see in her eyes the same emotion that had shown when they had almost kissed, but did not know what it was but it made his body tingle, so his complaint was swallowed as he tried to regain his composure. But the feeling still spread from the pit of his stomach and went throughout his body, making his toes tingle, the hair on the back of his neck to stand on end and made him want to lean down and kiss her again, like that kiss they had shared on the balcony of his room almost a month ago. Howl mentally shook himself of such thoughts.

"Is there something the matter, my dear Sophie?" Howl asked as he reluctantly released her waist a little, a little slack between their bodies so he could think and she could escape if she wanted; which Howl hoped she would not do.

"No, I just came out here to tell you lunch is ready." Sophie mumbled as stepped back, to Howl's dismay, and averted her eyes. She dusted off her dress then looked back up to Howl. "Thank you for catching me. And I am sorry that I ran into you." Sophie said with a smile in an attempt to show him that she still wanted to be friends, even if they were both unsure of their feelings.

Howl smiled back in an answer and walked up next to her and extended his left arm. "Shall we?"

Sophie giggled quietly and put her right hand on his arm, and they made their way towards the castle. They stayed in perfect sync as they walked across the flower dotted field. His long legs did take two of her steps but she did not complain about him walking too fast, as most people did. Howl looked down at her form. She did not even make it up to his shoulder, even in her high heeled boots that she wore last week and have not been taking off since then; it seemed since she always wore them. Her silver air was pulled back into a braid again but it let her face gain attention with its soft baby skin, cute button nose, her little ears in front of her hair, and her pouty pink lips that probably still tasted-

Howl shook his head and made his attention go to the doorway. His mind clouded over with different thoughts, but within a couple seconds, they were focused again on the young woman next to him.

"Howl?" Sophie asked meekly.

Howl escaped from his thoughts and focused on her voice. "Yes?" he asked.

"What were you…" she started but then Howl heard her dress ruffle from movement. He looked down at her to see her shaking her head. "Never mind…" She mumbled to her left side, away from him.

This stung Howl in ways words could not describe. "What is it Sophie?" Howl asked as he stopped and turned towards her. He stood in front of her, his left hand on her right elbow and his right hand reached over to softly take her cheek in his hand to turn her head towards him. Her soft brown eyes were half swimming in tears, which made him feel even worse about something. Something that he could not quite place, all he knew is that it felt like someone had just started squeezing his heart. "Sophie, what is the matter dear?" He brought his left hand to put on her other cheek to force her to look at him but also to try and wipe the tears that were now running down her face freely.

"Nothing Howl…" She whispered as she tried to look down, but he tilted her face back up towards his.

"There is something wrong Sophie. You would not be crying if there was not." Howl said.

Sophie looked up at him in surprise. Her eyes went wide and shaky as her brown eyes kept on looking into his. Howl started back in surprise at how much emotions were in her eyes. He saw sadness, nervousness, hope and something else, that had been in her eyes lately when she saw him, Howl noticed. It was something that he had not seen in awhile now that he thought about it, only something that he saw from his mother when he did see her in the first couple years of his life. But before he could question Sophie, Markle decided to make his entrance.

"Sophie!" He whined from the doorway, "Is lunch ready yet?"

"Hold on Markle! I will be right there!" Sophie yelled toward the boy. She then turned towards the older man and looked into his eyes again.

Howl stared back, lost in the dark pools of brown that were swimming in his blue ones. Howl mentally shook his head, and reached into his pocket. He gave her his handkerchief than extended his left arm to her again. "Shall we go and not let the little monsters stay hungry anymore?"

Sophie's smile wavered as she brought the handkerchief to her eyes and dabbed them. "Only if you say so."

Howl smiled back and they started their walk towards the house.

But Howl did not eat hardly anything that day, for some reason, all he could do was stare at her. How her hips slightly moved back and forth when she walked, making a heat spread from his stomach out to fan through his whole body to finally leave him breathless, how when she smiled there was a small dimple in her right cheek and it was just the right size for his tongue to slide on and fit perfectly, how her silver hair was falling out of her tight braid again today and it looked as soft as the flower petals that they were just walking through, and her skin looked as soft as the clouds that Howl was watching only a little bit before and probably tasted like-

Howl made himself stop there or else he was not going to get any sleep again tonight. He sighed and looked down at the soup that was given to him for lunch today. The vegetables floated on the top and swirled when he spun his spoon around in a circle in the broth for what seemed the hundredth time.

"Howl?" Sophie asked. Howl quickly brought his head up to look at her. Concern was in her eyes. "Are you feeling all right?"

"Yes of course why?" Howl said forcing on a smile.

"Because vegetable soup is your favorite and you have not eaten or said anything the whole time you have been sitting there." Sophie said as she stood up. Howl looked around the table and noticed that Markle and Wendy were done and gone from the table.

Howl just shrugged, guess I am really out of it, he thought.

"I am sorry Sophie," Howl said sincerely, "It is nothing against your cooking because your cooking is excellent; I am just not too hungry today."

"Howl you have not been hungry all week, are you sure you are feeling okay?" Sophie asked as she turned around to take his bowl from him. She dumped the soup in the pot to be eaten perhaps later and put the bowl on the counter. She turned back around to look at him.

"I really do not know Sophie." Howl said truthfully as he stood up to stand at the counter near her. He closed his eyes and sighed, leaning against the counter. After about a moment of silence he felt something press against him. Something very soft, and very familiar. He opened his eyes to see an arm, then the feeling of someone's hand on his forehead almost made him jump, but Sophie's voice soothed him.

"You don't have a fever, but why don't you go and sleep for a little bit? I will come up and check on you as soon as I am done with a couple chores all right?" Sophie said as she brought her hand back down.

Howl nodded and started for the stairs. As his footsteps disappeared from the steps and his bedroom door closed, Sophie busied herself to get the chores done quickly. The dishes were washed, the floors swept, Calcifer with more firewood, and the laundry put out to dry in a matter of an hour. She got a glass of water and started up the stairs herself.

As she stood outside of Howl's room, hand poised in the air about to knock, a moan from inside made her stop. She stopped and leaned her ear against the door, and a moan came out again, but not in pain like how she thought she first heard it as, but in frustration and fear. She strained her ears even more to hear the ruffling of clothe and creaks of a bed, as if someone was flaying their arms and moving in their bed.

Sophie reached for the doorknob then froze when she heard a shout from within the room she was about to enter.

Sophie quickly opened the door, her eyes trying to adjust to the sudden darkness that she had walked into. Another moan from Howl's bed made her feet move towards the sound. She set the glass on the table next to her as she sat down on his bed.

She reached over to grab his shoulder, "Howl?" she whispered.

But he only started to breath heavy in response.

The dream always started the same. Howl was sitting at the table, a young boy again. He was smiling as he scooped a spoonful of his mother's soup into his waiting mouth. He looked at his mother, a smile forming as he took the spoon out of his closed lips. His mother smiled back and went back to reading her book. But then a blast made the house shake around the two people. Mother grabbed for child as child grabbed for mother. They hid under the table.

Pottery, silverware, lamps, mirrors, anything not nailed to the floor all sailed to the ground or against the wall. Howl curled into his mother for protection then it was silence once again.

Howl peered around, and then smiled. "Mother! It's over!" He went onto his hands and knees and looked down at his mother.

But his mother's face was replaced by someone else's. Another woman. A woman with big beautiful brown eyes now dulled over in death. Her paled face was covered in her own blood, her mouth and eyes open in a forever silenced scream. Her body was limp in his arms as he tried to grasp the fact that he could not do anything else for her. He would not see her smile anymore…or hear her laughter…or taste her cooking…or be able to talk to her.

Howl stared down at her, a tear drop landed on her cheek and he did not care. He then buried his face into her hair as he started to sob.

"Sophie…no…my poor Sophie…please...no…" he whispered.

"Howl! Howl please! Wake up!"

Howl heard her voice! But his nightmare started to disappear as he started to gain consciences…

Howl awoke with a start. He looked around then saw that Sophie was leaning over him, her hair around her as a halo, the light making her look even more like an angel to him. He sat up and wrapped his arms around her as he buried his face in her hair.

"Sophie…oh my dear Sophie…" He whispered.

"I'm here…don't worry…" Sophie soothed. She rubbed his back, trying to make him stop shuddering in fear. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked softly after a couple moments. Markle having those nightmares are not such a bad thing I guess, Sophie said to herself trying not to smile in glee that the man she loved was gripping onto her as if she was his only anchor to keep him there.

"Bombs started to fall…and you died…because I could not protect you…" Howl whispered after a couple moments of intense silence.

Sophie's eyes shot open in alarm, he cared if she died? She pulled away from him to look into his eyes. She almost started to cry with him as she saw the intense sadness and regret in his eyes.

"You can not get rid of me that easily, Howl." Sophie said with a sincere smile. He smiled back as she said, "I am always going to be with you, Howl, no matter what."

Howl sighed as he leaned forward and nuzzled his nose into her neck once again. "Thank you Sophie." He whispered. He opened his eyes to look onto her creamy neck and gave into his impulse for the first time in a week.

Sophie stiffened as she felt Howl's lips upon her pulse point on her neck but it then turned into a shudder as he did it again. She brought her left hand up from his back to his right shoulder.

Howl smiled as he felt her shudder again when he breathed on the sensitive flesh. He slowly kissed, nibbled, and licked a path up to her cheek but suddenly started to go for her ear not her mouth, as she expected. Sophie gasped in shock at the rush of sensations that flowed from her ear and made her tremble down to her toes. Howl slowly traced the shell of her ear with his tongue making her grasp onto the front of his nightshirt in complete bliss.

Howl then traced her hairline with kisses, going across her forehead to then trace across her right cheek and nose to her other cheek, then went up to kiss her closed eyelids. Sophie was slowly slipping into a realm that only her and Howl only existed…it did not matter that he was in his nightgown…it did not matter that she was in Howl's room…it did not matter that the door was open…

Sophie suddenly stiffened and looked at the open door. And there stood her worst nightmare; a witness to what she was letting Howl do to her.

"Good night, Master Howl…" Markle yawned as he went by, not even looking in. Sophie blinked in surprise.

"Markle," Howl called slowly lifting his head from the corner of Sophie's left eyes, "can you shut the door for me please? I need to talk to Sophie privately."

"Sure, good night Sophie." Markle said half asleep.

The door softly closed, but seemed like it thundered throughout the house to Sophie's acute nerves, that could feel everything around her. She could smell the potion that Howl used on his hair, the light smell of flowers still lingering on his skin, his lips that were slowly going down her cheek their destination obvious, his hands searing through her thin dress, and of the feeling deep in her that this felt so right! But it can not be right, he does not love me! Sophie said to herself.

Sophie started to struggle in Howl's arms, her hands that were gripping onto his making him come closer to her were now pushing him away and her head was swiveling back and forth.

"Sophie, what is the matter?" Howl asked concerned.

"Let…me…go!" Sophie said as she struggled to get away from him. For a lean man, Sophie was surprised to be as weak as a kitten to him.

"Why?" Howl asked confused.

Sophie stopped only for a moment to remember why she had came into the room in the first place, and then her eyes laid on the glass of water. "B-B-Because I only ca-came in here to give you that glass of water. But then you were having nightmare so I wanted to make sure you were okay…but then you started to…" Sophie's face started to flame in red embarrassment again. She hid her face in her curtain of hair in an attempt to hide. But Howl's hand came underneath her chin once again that day to make her look into his shining blue eyes that were swimming in…love? No it could not be…could it? Sophie said to herself.

"What? This?" asked Howl. He bent his head and his lips tenderly went to Sophie's surprised ones.

Sophie stiffened but then the wall of her resistance started to crumble, she did not care that he did not say that he loved her; she wanted to show him that she did.

Sophie wrapped her arms around his neck and up turned her face to his, giving herself willingly to him. Howl's hands could not keep still along her back; they traveled from her shoulder down her spine, across her tiny waist, down the flare of her hips.

Howl then gently ran his tongue along her bottom lip. Sophie gasped slightly, and Howl flicked his tongue to her top lip, scraping part of her two front teeth. The touch heated its way through every nerve ending in her mouth, making her gasp again. She tilted her head back in enjoyment.

"Oh Sophie…" Howl moaned against her lips. Sophie gave him her answer by placing her lips against his. She started to lean against him making him lay down upon his bed once again.

Howl slid his tongue against her lips once again and into her mouth. Again Sophie gasped at the feelings that ran across her lips to shiver through her body, her lips opening more for Howl. He wanted a taste and once he did he could not stop. His tongue went across her lips, into her mouth to taste and explore every corner.

He started to rotate his body so Sophie was under him. His body pinned hers onto the bed. Fire scorched their mouths with every caress of each other, their hands branding their own trails down the other's body. Howl's hands were slowly tracing the sides of the woman beneath him while she was tracing his back in lazy wide circles.

The need for air made the two couple pull back reluctantly from each other. Howl's blue eyes looked down into Sophie's brown, desire ablaze in both sets.

Howl brought in a shaky breath in an attempt to gather his wits, but found it impossible considering that every part of him that was in contact with Sophie was making him want to-

"Oh God…" Howl moaned. "Sophie…please…you have to go…before I do something we both will regret…"

Sophie pulled back, her head now completely dependent on the pillow beneath her shoulders. Her brown eyes were now swimming in hurt, making Howl regret that he said anything. "Did I do something wrong?" She asked meekly.

"No!" He said a little too quickly. She blinked in surprise, and Howl breathed in deeply to try and collect his thoughts once again. But it was extremely hard to do when the temptress that has been haunting in his every thought…every breath…every moment of his day, was lying beneath him! "No…you didn't do anything wrong Sophie…" He tried again as he started to rub her shoulders, "I did, I shouldn't be kissing you and touching you and…just it could lead to something that we could both regret, and I don't want you to get hurt. I'd feel terrible if I hurt you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did and I-" Howl's ramblings were cut off by a pair of lips covering his own.

Sophie slowly let go of his lips and smiled when she leaned back down into the pillow to see Howl still trying to collect his thoughts. "The only way you'll hurt me is if you send me away." Sophie whispered truthfully.

Howl blinked in surprise. She could not mean that could she? Howl thought.

"Yes I'm telling the truth Howl." Sophie said smiling.

Howl's face went into confusion.

"Your face expressions say a lot Howl." Sophie said sarcastically scolding him.

Howl smiled and lowered his head onto hers again. His lips barely touched hers then he slowly made his way across her cheek, to travel down her neck and tease her collar bone. Then he started to drag his teeth under her dress collar to begin to try and drag it down. He managed to slowly bring the barrier between her skin and his curious mouth down, the dress getting caught for only a moment on her straining nipples. The sensation of Howl's breath and her dress being pulled off of her so very slowly, made her writhe in irritation and anticipation.

Howl smiled and then released her dress; the material fell willingly across the bottom of her breasts. He stared down at the cream colored tempting mounds of flesh that were tipped with raspberry colored aroused nipples.

Sophie was floating on a cloud and refused to descend. Then she felt as if a cold bucket of water was splashed in her when Howl quickly got off and stood up and started to walk away from the bed. "Howl?" Sophie asked.

Howl looked at her and nearly gave into the temptation to just go back onto the bed and let his body kiss away her blush and taste what her heaving chest tasted-

"Sophie please…go…I'll just hurt you more…" Howl whispered as he turned away from her.

Sophie's jaw clicked shut and her eyes flashed dangerously. She quickly stood up, ripped her dress up to her collar bone, and walked towards the door. She looked back at Howl as she brought her hand onto the doorknob. Howl had regret swimming in his blue eyes. "Don't even try and pretend that this hurts you Howl! Because I know it doesn't!" She yelled. She ripped open the door and slammed the door shut. Howl heard her run down the hallway then slam her own door.

Howl shook his head as tears started to well in his eyes again. "It hurts more than you'll ever know Sophie…" He whispered, wishing he could say it to the one woman who ever held her heart.

(break)

A year. A year she had waited for him to tell her something; anything; something to make her stay. But he never did. Calcifer was right; he was never going to change; just because he had a heart did not mean that he would mature; since he did get rid of it when he was a child, a child's heart, that is all it is; and a child is all he will ever act like.

Sophie sighed. She did not want to believe her thoughts, or her friends, or her family, all she wanted to believe is that he was going to change; that maybe, just maybe, his heart would mature to the age that his body was at. But a year. A year had passed!

"And he still hasn't changed!" Sophie's mother argued with her. "Do you want to waste your life here? I know that it hurts that he'll never come around and-" But Sophie cut her off.

"Mother, I love him. I know you may call me crazy, I even call myself it, but I can't change it; I've tried! I know it isn't fair to me; all I've ever wanted is for him to show a little bit of love to me! All he does is kiss me on the cheek now about once a week, ever since that little episode after his nightmare a year ago! I just want him to love me that same way that I love him! But he never can! Because his heart is telling him no since it's still a child!" It was then that Sophie's wall broke. Her tears that she had held at bay for days; weeks; months; a year, no more than a year she had waited and she could not wait anymore. She had to get out of there, or she was going to go insane!

She could smell him everywhere here; taste him; feel him; but she could never just see him. He was always too busy for her; never allowing himself out of his room unless she was not home or was asleep. And when he did leave he did not come back for days, sometimes weeks, and then when he returned he would either be angry or not be able to stand up right he was so tired.

"I can not take this!" Sophie screamed into her closed hands that were over her face.

Sophie's mother walked around the kitchen table to take her daughter into her arms. She sat down on the stool next to her and started to rock Sophie as she let her tears freely flow down her face. "Shh…baby it is okay. He'll come around. He does love you sweetie."

"B-But mother…you-you're the one tha-that has been tell-tell-telling me to leave him!" Sophie sobbed.

"Because I thought…that's what would be best, but honey, if I took you away from here…you'd be miserable. Never being able to see him, or know that he was okay, or be able to cook and clean and be there for him, even if he doesn't come to you. At least he does have you here if he does need to talk. Even if he doesn't want to, but sometimes, Sophie," she hooked her left index finger under her daughter's chin to make her look up into her eyes, "you have to take matters into your own hands. Sometimes you have to show that the boys need to be men if they want a woman with them for the rest of their lives. And I know he wants you to stay here."

"How mother? How do you know?" Sophie asked in doubt searching into her mother's eyes still for support and to have a little hope that someone still loved her.

Her mother smiled down onto her. "Call it a woman's intuition, sweetie, and a mother's intuition that you love him still even with all the pain he gives you."

Sophie nodded in defeated agreement as she brought her gaze down to her hands, now clasped tightly in her lap. She did love him, with her whole heart and soul. Nothing that anyone could say or do could ever change that, and that's what was so hard. Another tear slid down Sophie's cheek in the realization that even if he picked another woman over her, she would still be here; always hoping that he would come to his senses to realize that he loved her too.

Sophie sniffed to try and stop her tears. Her mother was right; she had to take matters into her own hands if she wanted him to love her. Sophie then blinked in surprise.

"Is that what you did with father?" Sophie asked looking back up at her mother.

Sophie's mother's eyes lit up in amusement. "Of course I did you really think you're father just fell in love with me? I made him." Sophie and her mother laughed in a mother-daughter moment but it was interrupted by the click of the door dial changing.

Sophie looked at her mother. "Well I guess Markle's home from the market, I'll help him bring in the things I asked him to bring. I'll be right back." As she stood, Sophie brought her mother close again and gave her a hug as a thank you. She walked towards the stairs as she wiped her eyes and started to make her way down the first step as the door opened. "Markle did you remember to get the-" Sophie stopped with her right foot on the second step as she saw who walked through the door.

His midnight blue hair shone with the sun streaming in behind him, the jacket doing little to cover the lean body that was now towering in the doorway. His clothes were dusty from the week he had not been home, but Sophie thought he could not have looked any better even if he just stepped out of the bath.

"Howl…" Sophie breathed on a gasp.

Howl brought his ocean blue eyes onto her, but Sophie's own eyes widened in surprise in what she saw. Nothing; nothing was in his eyes, as if he did not even recognize her. The glazed look he gave chilled her from the very center of her heart to all corners of her soul. The one man that she loved was destroying himself, but over what?

"Howl! What happened?" Sophie said getting herself out of her trance, she nearly ran down the last five steps to make her way towards him. She stood in front of him and looked up into his face, his eyes bore into her own looking onto her as if just seeing her for the first time. Sophie slowly brought her right hand up to his face. Lightly placing it on his left cheek, she looked at him sympathetically.

The touch must have awakened him though, for his eyes blinked and he looked at her as if he recognized her then fear pooled into her favorite blue eyes. "Hello Sophie." Howl's voice said in sadness. "Excuse me." He closed the door and brushed past her, almost gliding over the floor, hardly making any noise as he walked across the room, up the stairs, and to quietly close his door behind him.

Sophie stared after him with a blank look of confusion. What did I do? Sophie asked herself. The door dial clicking again behind Sophie made her come back into reality, as Markle came through the door with the food that Sophie had asked him to get for dinner and the next week.

"I got extra apples and potatoes like you asked Sophie. Where do you-Sophie? Are you okay?" Markle said quickly as he walked through the door, the fruits and vegetables and other items now scattered across the doorstep.

"Yes I'm sorry Markle let me help you." Sophie said mentally shaking her head in how stupid she could be to stare after the floor that Howl just walked on. Lord help me and all women that have this love sickness, Sophie thought as she sighed.

"Oh dear!" Sophie heard her mother say, as she also heard a clank of her teacup. Footsteps came across the floor to stand on top of the steps. Sophie looked up to her mother. "I must go! I forgot I told Robert I'd be back by six and it is quarter to seven! Oh dear! I hope he doesn't get mad!" She walked briskly down the steps and, avoiding the spilt food, made her way out onto the street. "I'll come and talk to you soon dear! Take my advice please!" She waved as she started down the street.

Sophie lifter her skirts and made her way through the maze of food also and stood in the doorway. "I will mother! Tell Robert I say hello!" Sophie waved after her mother as she stepped into her Robert's car.

"I will dear! Good bye now!" Her mother waved again out the window as the car made its way down the crowded street.

Sophie stared after the car dragging her mother away from her, for the second time this week. Every time she tried to talk to her, she wouldn't open up until her mother had to leave. And usually she was late, and Sophie knew her new step father was probably getting a little agitated at Sophie's mother. But Sophie knew her mother had her ways of persuasion, she knew that trait too well; she got that trait from her mother and she used it as much as she could. Usually, she was able to get her way by just pushing her way until the person just gave in. Always worked; and it was going to become a very good tool soon. Sophie smiled to herself as a planned formed in her mind as she turned back into the house, and started to pick up the items for dinner that now needed a little more cleaning.

After Sophie and Markle picked up the fruits and vegetables, and took the meat, eggs and bread out of the basket, which Markle was able to keep from getting too dirty, then cleaned them and put them away, Sophie shooed Markle out of the kitchen so she could start dinner. Hein followed close behind at Markle's heels as he walked out the door into the field. Sophie shook her head in amusement. Those two were more connected then Siamese twins, but they were so cute together; Markle always laughing and Hein seemed to be smiling also as he ran and kept up with the little boy's energy. Sophie watched as Markle pretended to trip and Hein landed on him stomach. Markle started to laugh that rang through all the opened windows of the castle to bring a sweeter air to the already happy castle.

Except for that one room…the room that was always closed off from the rest of the world. The windows shut and the door always shut also. Never letting anyone in and never letting anyone out.

And it broke Sophie's heart. She sighed as she peeled the potatoes that she was going to make into mashed potatoes. But her attention did not stay on the almost skinless vegetable in her hand, so in her daze the knife slipped and sliced her left thumb. A drop of blood dripped off her thumb onto her palm to slowly slide its way down her arm, a trail of others following its example until drops of blood were dripping into the sink.

Sophie did not even notice. She kept skinning the potato that is until she realized the now skinless 'apple of the earth' was turning pink.

Sophie looked at her left hand. Her finger tips were slightly pink but her thumb was bright red as was the trail of it pooling down her arm, to end at her elbow then fall into the sink to land on her pile of not peeled potatoes.

"Oh darn…" Sophie sighed. She set down the knife on the right side of the counter. She turned to her right to get a bandage. But a lean body made her stop short and fall against the sink ledge again. Sophie looked up startled then almost swallowed her tongue in awe.

"What did you do?" Howl asked.

"I-I-I…" Sophie stuttered stupidly then she collected herself and straightened her back then said in a monotone, "I cut myself. I'm fine though I'll bring your dinner up to you in about an hour." Sophie went around him to reach up for the medical box on the second highest shelf. Sophie stood on her tip toes reaching; her right hand fingers getting a little closer as she strained then an arm shot from behind her and grabbed it.

Sophie followed the arm as it coiled back to its owner. Howl handed her the box. "Here you might want to cover that soon, or you might stain your dress."

Sophie looked down to see that it indeed was dripping the skirt of her work dress.

"Oh darn…" Sophie repeated. She took the box and sat down at the kitchen table. Taking out a piece of cloth and antibiotics, she rubbed it against the cut then started to put the things back in.

"What are you doing?" Howl asked in disbelief.

Sophie looked at him startled. He said as many words to her today as he did for the whole year that had passed. "I cleaned it. It's fine. I have to do dinner. Excuse me." Sophie said quickly as she stood on the stool to put the medical box away.

But Howl's arm came back up to grab the box from her. She looked at him, confusion etched on her face. Howl then surprised her by grabbing her around the thighs, which were chest level with him at that moment, and carried her a couple steps to slowly slide her down his body. Her soft, small frame sliding against his lithe one, made her breath catch. Their clothing only added to the friction that was igniting the spark within them. The fire started to grow a little bigger when their eyes met, her brown shining with gold flecks caught in lust while his sea blue were glazed with passion.

Sophie noticed that his own breath was just as shallow and short as hers, but then again it could be that his face was just inches from hers and was slowly closing in; his target her lips, his eyes darting there as if in approval. In an answer, Sophie stood on her the tips if her toes to close the space between them, their lips crashing into each other in a bruising kiss, but neither of them complaining. Or even caring where they were; Sophie wrapped her arms around his neck as he leaned down into her frame even more as his own arms circled around her waist. Howl tilted his head to his right as did Sophie, making the kiss even deeper. Howl gently started to run his tongue along her bottom lip, making Sophie moan into his mouth, but then she almost fell when she was pushed suddenly away from her anchor to the world. She looked sharply at Howl. His eyes were shut tight, his eyelids creasing from the pressure and his teeth were clenched in his closed mouth, a muscle working in his jaw.

"Howl?" Sophie asked meekly.

Howl's eyes slowly opened to her. His eyes held sorrow and pain. He looked her over, her silver hair slightly out of her now mid-back level braid, her eyes still filled with passion and her lips still wet and bruised from his kiss. A hot feeling shot throughout Howl's body to slowly tingle to his manhood and he could feel it tighten in response to the woman standing before him.

"I must go. Be careful in the kitchen please, I don't want to see you hurt." Howl, against his will, leaned into her again and gave her a small peck on the lips. As he pulled away he watched Sophie's eyes flutter back open, to focus on him. She smiled at him in that sweet smile that he loved so much, and nodded in answer. "That's my girl." Howl said as he lightly smiled too and made his way up to his room again, picking up a book on his way up.

Sophie followed his actions up the stairs for the second time that day, but this time a plan started to take seed in her mind and made her smile in what was going to happen tonight.

"Why are you smiling?" Calcifer asked with irony.

Sophie blushed as she answered, "Sorry you had to see that."

"I'm not." Calcifer answered truthfully. "I just wish it hadn't of taken him that long to do something like that to you."

Sophie blushed even harder. "Calcifer, can I ask a favor from you?"

"Yes of course anything you wish I'll do, as long as I don't leave the hearth." Calcifer said chuckling.

"Yes well…" Sophie cleared her throat as she pulled her dress down a little farther and she blushed crimson red, "can you keep Markle and Wendy busy tonight? I don't think they would want to be upstairs."

It was Calcifer's turn to become embarrassed. "Y-Yes…" he stuttered out.

Sophie nodded towards him, her face still red as she said meekly, "Thank you" She went back over to the sink to finish her task of peeling the potatoes.

After dinner, Sophie did her usual chores. Cleaned the dishes, put the dishes away, and swept the floor. Once these were done Sophie started to get Howl's dinner plate together; she put a piece of chicken, a spoonful of mashed potatoes, another spoonful of peas, and a slice of bread onto the plate in her hands. Sophie took the now full plate and the silverware that were wrapped in the napkin, and started towards the stairs. When she went passed Calcifer, she looked over and gave him a wink.

Calcifer backed into his hearth a little in embarrassment, making Sophie smile even more; and put another splash of red on her cheeks. She put the silverware in her pocket as she took a handful of her skirt to go up the stairs.

Each step that went under Sophie's feet, made her want to dash up the stairs and forget her whole plan. But if she did not then Howl probably would not ever talk to her again. But then again, he might not talk to her ever again after tonight either.

"Stop it Sophie." Sophie told herself. "You never know until you try."

Sophie made it up the stairs, a little too quickly for her frayed nerves, and made her way towards Howl's door. As she stood in front of it she took a deep breath then lifted her right hand and knocked on the door.

"Just leave it on the floor please." Howl said tensely from the other side of the wood.

Sophie was taken back. He never asked her to do that. Did she do something wrong? She hardly talked to him what could she have…oh the kiss. Sophie felt a lump form in the back of her throat. Maybe he was not the right one after all.

Sophie placed the plate on the floor, and then dashed towards her room, the tears already streaming down her face; her plan forgotten as she slammed her door shut.

Howl looked at the door confused. Why did she run to her room? He was getting dressed; did she really want to see him like that?

Well then again, she did walk into the bathroom when he was getting out of his bath. At the time he did not know whose face was more red, his or hers.

Howl shook his head. He did not like this. He did not like not being able to talk to Sophie. He wanted to talk to her, see her smile again, hear her laughter, and be able to look into her eyes and drown in her deep brown eyes; never wanting to surface again.

But she ever tried to talk to him; she was never around when he was home. He would come downstairs and she would only look at him, never really talking to him. Or did she? Every time he came out of his room or came home he made sure she was not around. And now that he thought about it, it was not a mad look that she was giving him, it was a longing look. A look that she wanted nothing more than to talk to him, to have their friendship take off where it was supposed to.

Howl wanted to smash his head through the wall. How can I be so stupid?! Howl asked himself.

"I've been avoiding her…" Howl whispered to himself.

I guess I did not really grow up now did I? Howl asked himself. I'm being a child by just avoiding the problem and in the process I'm hurting Sophie worse than I could ever dream. Howl ripped on his night wear pants, and briskly walked to his door. He slowly turned the handle and poked his head out of his door. He looked down the hallway to his right and his left. No one was there and he was glad, he snuck his half dressed body out of his room, after picking up his dinner plate and putting it in his room, he started towards Sophie's room. Her room came up to his right side very quick, her room only three doors down. But, just as he was about to knock, reality hit him in a cold splash.

"What am I doing?" Howl whispered to himself. "She probably never wants to talk to me again." Howl shook his head at himself at how drastic he was about to be. Then a creek of a door opening made him almost jump out of his skin. He looked up to see Sophie's door opening, and a body frame blocking the light, the shadow of the body only casting a shadow up to the bottom of his rib cage, the angle of the light changing the height of the person.

"Howl? What are you doing her?" A female voice said.

Howl's eyes almost came out of his head when the voice registered into his mind. "Sophie?" He asked in disbelief.

Sophie stood before him in an outfit that Howl thought he'd never see with her. She was wearing a white nightgown. Her silver hair was down to swing around the low cut V in her nightgown that was outlined by the light, the fabric left hardly anything to the imagination as Howl slowly made his eyes look down her. Howl felt all the blood rush to his cheeks and then a hot swelling feeling went straight to his loins, which only made him blush even more.

Sophie started to blush, she thought that he was not going not see this but guess she was wrong.

"Won't you come in and keep me company?" Sophie asked as she gathered the last of her courage and hooked her index fingers into the band of his night trousers and began to drag him into her room.

Dimly, Howl followed her; his body reacting quicker than his mind could. Sophie gave him a smile as she stood on her tip toes and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

"Don't move." Sophie said seductively, a blush forming on her cheeks. Memories flashed before her eyes but she pushed them aside. Howl would not do that to her again.

She took her fingers off of the band, making Howl almost moan in protest. Howl followed her with a twist of his head to see that she was shutting her door. As the door clicked shut, Howl started to play Sophie's little game. Before she could turn around, Howl pressed his body into her back; making her thud into the door, as he started to push her hair off of her neck to start giving it his attention. Sophie tilted her head to the right to give Howl more skin to work with. He smiled then slowly raked his teeth along her collar bone to the indent of her neck. Sophie gasped in pleasure her back arching; her buttocks went into his legs, the small of her back hitting something that was very sensitive. Howl's hips then bucked into her, making her moan again and the door creak in protest.

Sophie's skin was aflame on her back, her nightgown only intensifying the heat radiating off of Howl's bare chest, but the front of her that was against the cool wood, made her body tighten to try and stat warm; the contrast between cold and hot made her shudder in pure delight.

"Oh Sophie…" Howl moaned into her ear. Howl slowly dragged his hands down the side of her torso. Sophie gasped then let it out in a shuddering sigh. She quickly turned in his arms, taking him by surprise and took the moment to her advantage.

She jumped, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his middle, as her lips crashed onto his. Howl wrapped his own arms around her middle and leaned against the door. Sophie's back went against the door in a loud thud but she paid no mind.

The two kissed each other passionately, their tongues dueling in a battle for dominance. Then Howl took Sophie off of the door and started to walk towards her bed. Slowly he lowered her onto the linens, and then gave her a sweet kiss on her lips as he stood again.

Sophie opened her eyes, and he wanted to cry in pure happiness. Here she was, the woman that had haunted his dreams for a year, and now she was giving herself willingly to him. Her nightgown was bunched around the highest part of her thighs, and the V had slid over now revealing a freckle on her left breast. This had to the best night of his life. He leisurely crawled his way towards her, his legs went between hers and his arms went on either side of her body. Sophie looked up at him, her eyes filled now with uncertainty, confusion and fear.

Howl smiled, "It'll be okay, you're with me."

Sophie smiled back, "I know and that makes me so happy I can't put it in words." She brought up her right hand and pushed his hair behind his ear, trying to fight off the urge to push him off, and the memories of the last time they were like this reeling before her eyes. In response to her action he grabbed her hand and started to kiss her palm and was slowly making his way up her arm when she said, "But I've never done anything." Her face turned even more bright red.

"It's okay." Howl said not stopping from his actins of trailing up her arm. "I think that will make this more memorable."

Sophie blushed more but could not for that long for Howl reached the indent of her elbow and darted his tongue out to taste her skin. Sophie moaned and closed her eyes; her breathing starting to become heavy again.

Howl forced himself to slow down when his lips reached her sleeve which was a couple inches above her elbow. He brought his right hand over as he grabbed Sophie's wrist with his left and slowly dragged the white material up her arm and he followed his hand with his lips until he reached her shoulder then stopped.

Howl then rolled off of Sophie and lay on his side, mischief in his eyes as he propped his head up with his left arm. "Well I don't think is fair."

Sophie's eyebrows went together in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Why am I just in my night pants while you're in a short sleeve ankle length white nightgown?" Howl asked raising an eyebrow.

Sophie blushed looking down. "Well it isn't exactly ankle length at the moment." Sophie said blushing even more. Howl followed her gaze to see that her nightgown was in fact in the middle of her thighs. Her creamy legs were more perfect than Howl could imagine. Her calves were perfectly toned, her feet small and dainty and her thighs were a creamy white and made Howl want to rip the nightgown off to see if the rest of her body was still that color.

With that image in his mind now, Howl could feel his manhood spring even more to life. He nearly groaned out loud, but instead he went onto his back and threw his left arm over his eyes; trying to regain control.

Sophie looked at him confused again. What did I do? Sophie asked herself. Well he can't run away from me I won't let him and neither can I. Sophie quietly slid her nightgown up over her head, her body now with without a stitch of clothing on. She quickly pounced on Howl so he could not go anywhere and so she would not change her mind.

Howl jumped in surprise and grabbed her hips as his eyes shot open in surprise then his pupils got very small and his breathe hitched in his throat as he saw her completely naked form for the first time. Her hips were so small he could span them with his hands, her breasts were the same creamy color of her thighs still, her nipples pointing at him in a raspberry color and her stomach flat, taunt, and perfect; then his eyes slowly slid to between her legs. Her hair on her head might have changed sliver but her feminine hairs were still a dark brown. Howl slowly looked back up to Sophie's eyes and saw her beautiful brown eyes swimming in fear and anticipation.

"Oh Sophie…" Howl moaned. He brought his right hand to go at the base of her head to bring her down to his chest. He nearly lost his mind when he felt her soft breasts on his own chest, and when her mouth touched his, fire spread from their lips to slowly tingle down them to slowly spread out to every nerve ending.

Sophie moaned in the back of her throat and felt something stiffen under her curls and jumped in surprise. She pulled away. "What was that?" She asked.

Howl looked at her. "You don't…" Howl started, but then stopped. Sophie told him before that she never knew her father and did not have a boy in her family so of course she would not know how his manhood would react to her. Howl smiled softly up at her. "Why don't you find out?"

Sophie looked him, her getting eyes big. "B-b-but…" she stammered. She started to draw back in fear and a blush forming on her cheeks. She shut her eyes and shook her head back and forth, her somewhat loose hair swinging around her in a blur of silver. She started to climb off of Howl but he caught her around the waist again.

"Sophie what's the matter?" Howl asked concerned.

Sophie tried to squirm away and started to push against him. He grabbed her wrists but she started to squirm again. Howl then took her wrists in his right hand and put his left hand on the small of her back. He then flipped them over, her back now on the bed sheets. Sophie started to squirm even more.

"Sophie. Sophie! Look at me! What's the matter?" Howl asked.

"No don't! Stop I-I-I-" Sophie started to stammer.

Howl did the only thing he could think of. He brought his head down and gently put his lips against hers. She stiffened but then slowly relaxed against him. When he rose his head back up, tears were running down her face.

"Sophie…" Howl started.

"I-I-I'm sorry…it's ju-just th-th-tha-that…I-I-" Sophie tried to explain but her tears were forcing her not to say what she needed to say come out the right way.

"Shh…it's okay…I'm here…" Howl said, his mind swimming in thoughts in what could have happened to make her be like this. He rolled them over to their sides and he brought her to rest her head on his shoulder, her hands coming up in front of her face as she cried into them. His left arm was under her body and pressing her close, while his right hand rubbed her back to try and calm her down. Thoughts bounced around in his head, trying to grasp one as to what could make her act like this. Then he stiffened as a thought came into his head.

"Sophie…" He started; he pulled her away slightly so he could make eye contact. He ducked his head a little so her brown eyes were looking into his blue. "Were you raped?" He asked. Hoping it wasn't true or else he'd kill the man who did.

Sophie's eyes got big and she let out a little sob. "No!" She said "But-" she started but then her eyes squeezed shut and bit her lip as her body started to shake as she started to sob even harder.

Howl wrapped his arms around her pulling her close and his right arm started to run through her hair. He sagged in relief, but his thoughts were still swimming in ideas of what could have happened.

"I'm sorry…" Sophie mumbled after a couple minutes.

"I'll let you sleep." Howl said as he started to roll out of bed.

"No! Please! I want to! I just…" Sophie said, now embarrassed of her lack of clothing, she grabbed her sheet and wrapped it around her chest; effectively covering the rest of her body also.

Howl smiled and leaned down to her, putting his left hand on her cheek as his right hand was on the bed keeping him balance. "It's okay, we will don't worry. I just don't want you to get scared of me; I want you to be ready for me." He leaned down and pecked his lips on hers.

But Sophie wanted it now she was ready and wanted to prove it to the one man she loved and wanted to make love to. So she made it more than a quick goodnight kiss that Howl wanted it to be. She ran her tongue along the line of his lips making him gasp in surprise and she took the advantage to swiftly explore his mouth. She dropped the sheet to wrap her arms around his neck and drag him down onto the bed.

Howl slowly came down onto her, his body fitting perfectly between her now open thighs. He did not press against her though; afraid she might get scared again.

Sophie wanted to scream in protest. Why was he pulling away? She made her thoughts come out with her actions when she arched up to his chest and her hips went into his. Howl sucked his breath through his teeth trying to keep himself in check.

"Sophie…stop…or else I won't be able to…" Howl forced through his teeth.

Sophie looked up at him. His eyes were clenched shut and his arms were shaking on either side of her.

"I don't want you to go Howl." Sophie pleaded. "I want to love you…please?"

Howl looked into her eyes and almost regretted it. He could see the pain that he was putting on her.

"Sophie…" Howl said trying to put his thoughts into words, "I don't want you to get scared again and run away screaming and never give me a chance again. But I do want to love you Sophie, God knows I do. But I don't want to hurt you." Howl said as he pushed her hair put of her face and pushed it behind her ear.

"You can't hurt me, Howl. You already did when you made me leave almost a year ago and plenty of times after that; I want to give this night to you, so you can remember me before I…" Sophie trailed off and tried to look away from Howl.

But he caught her chin with his finger. "Before you what?" Howl asked.

Sophie looked at him and bit her lip. "Before I leave…" She mumbled.

Howl felt like she punched him in the stomach. The air in his lungs were forced out in a mighty hit to the heart. She was leaving him?

"Why?" He asked meekly.

"Because…" Sophie started then stopped. Then she brought her chin up and reminded Howl of that night almost a year ago, "I don't want to be hurt anymore by you."

Howl felt lower than dirt, no probably farther but he could not think of anything lower because his mind shut off. What would life be without her?

"Please Sophie…you can't leave…" He whispered, "What about Wendy and Markle and Hein and-"

"I'll come and visit them and make sure that you're not home." Sophie said tensely.

Howl looked into her eyes, a tear running along his cheek to fall upon her own. "What about me?" He asked meekly, "Will you really leave me Sophie?"

Sophie's eyes softened and she raised her right hand to rest on his left cheek, "You'll always hold a part of me, Howl. As much as I don't want to admit this to you right now like this…but you'll always hold my heart because…because I…I love you Howl."

Howl looked down at her in surprise then a smile formed on his face. Then he took both his hands and cupped her face to kiss her fully and thoroughly on her stunned lips.

"Howl? What are you-?" Sophie started to ask when he pulled away but then he kissed her lightly, effectively quieting her.

"I don't want you to leave Sophie. If it weren't for you this castle would still be a disaster and I would be running from the Witch of the- I mean Wendy-and I would still be a coward and a child for that matter. But you changed me Sophie. You saved me! You gave me back my heart and allowed me to see the world as an adult! I know I haven't acted like one and I'm sorry. I just wanted to be good enough for you. That's all I ever wanted from anyone, and when I saw you…I knew that I had to have you! But you were always so prim and proper and I wanted to be a gentleman for you. But now I see I always was good enough. But Sophie you saved my heart, but you never fully gave it to me because you have part of me also my dear Sophie. You have a part of my heart because…I love you too. And my heart would never be able to fully heal ever again without you in it…"

Sophie looked up at him in surprise then a smile of her own spread across her face. "That's all I ever wanted to hear from you Howl…" Sophie said when they pulled apart to look into each other's eyes.

Howl looked down at her in confusion but mischief was shining in his eyes, "What? That I wasn't a gentleman?" he asked.

"Well that," She answered smiling in amusement, "but also that you love me."

She smiled even broader as Howl's eyes lit up on happiness. But when his lips touched hers again, thoughts were scattered from her mind; only the sensations of the very male body now pressing her into the mattress were passing through her hazy mind.

This is what she wanted…for a year she had waited for these emotions and sensations to go through her…and the only one that could make her breathless and feel as if she was a queen was slowly kissing his way down her neck.

"Howl…" Sophie whispered. She arched her back making her breasts thrust towards the one man she loved.

Howl made himself slow down, even though she was naked beneath him…and moaning…and tempting him oh so much with her creamy skin arched towards him. But he still went slowly towards her enticing silken globes of flesh, knowing that the reward was worth the wait.

Sophie gasped beneath him as his teasing lips kissed their way in a spiral around her left breast. He took his sweet time, making her writhe below him in impatience and anticipation. Howl smiled in amusement then fulfilled her wish and took her awaiting straining nipple into his hot mouth. Sophie gasped in surprise as her eyes flew wide in astonishment as the emotions and shivers of delight shook her body. She grasped his shoulders to try and stay on the cloud that he had formed around her. He traced the aroused raspberry colored nipples with his tongue then dragged his teeth across the peak making it rise higher as she was aroused more.

She started to twist and squirm beneath him again as new feelings in her stomach; she wanted Howl to do something but she did not know what. Agitated, Sophie tried to tell Howl what she wanted by thrusting her body towards his again.

Howl groaned at the movement, it had made her hips thrust against his own and made his manhood grow more erect in response to her soft body. He pulled his mouth away from her breast to try and control his body.

Sophie's chest was heaving, her breasts tormenting him as they rose and fell before his eyes. He groaned in frustration and latched his mouth onto her other breast. Sophie gasped in surprise as her senses were assaulted again.

Howl gradually brought his hands down her torso to lay on her hips, then he brought them back up and as they reached the undersides of her breasts, Howl started to travel his lips up to her collar bone and trace it to her shoulder. He then slid up to her neck, her ear, her cheek, her eyelids, and then finally her anticipating lips. She returned his passion with her own; her tongue matching his caress for caress. She wrapped her arms around his neck, making his shirtless chest rub against hers. Howl groaned just as Sophie released a moan of her own.

The two pulled apart to gaze into each other's eyes; brown stared into blue as blue bore into brown. Emotions were surfaced in both, only making the other gaze even deeper into their lover's eyes.

Howl brought his left hand up to Sophie's face and brushed her hair out of her face. He sighed as a smile broke across his face.

"What's that devious smile for?" Sophie asked.

"I just feel lucky…" Howl answered truthfully, he brought her hair to his lips and lightly kissed the velvety strands.

Sophie looked up at him, a smile spread across her own face. She tightened her hold on the man that she loved, making him press against her once again. "Why?" She asked coyly.

"Because I love a woman that loves me back." Howl said, as his eyes bore into hers again.

"Yes," She murmured, "yes you do…"

Howl's smile broadened, and then he brought his head to hers again and lovingly kissed her lips.

Sophie nearly cried at how gentle he was being, but was getting impatient at how slow he was being also.

She pulled away and said, "Howl…I love you but I'm afraid that if you don't hurry up I might not have enough courage that much longer…"

Howl chuckled and answered, "Of course my dear…your wish is my command…"

Sophie opened her mouth to respond, but Howl's mouth captured her retort and made his job easier of exploring her mouth. Sophie moaned again in bliss, she brought her left hand to tangle in his midnight hair. Howl's own left hand went up and captured her breast in his hand.

Sophie was trying to keep herself in check but could not help a gasp escape her as his fingers skillfully made her nipple peak more in response. But she gasped even louder when she felt his fingers tangling in her curls that protected her secret core. She shied away trying to escape by easing more into the bed.

"Shhhhh…" Howl soothed, as she whimpered in response to his searching and curious fingers, "I won't hurt you…"

Howl, trying to take away some of her fright, turned them to his right to lie on their sides; so she could turn away if she wanted to. He brought his lips onto hers again to try and refocus her again. His hand abandoned her breast to slide up to her neck. His fingers traced small circles on the nape of head, making goose bumps form in response to the light touches.

Howl felt her body start to sag in response to his touches and he unhurriedly followed her thigh down to her knee then back up to skip over her nest of brown curls and go to her right thigh.

Sophie groaned in protest and she tightened her hold on Howl's neck, trying to say through actions to stop teasing her. Howl smiled against her lips as he complied to her wordless request and gently traced her folds through her thatch of curls. He then pushed his middle finger into the slick warmth and moaned. She was wet, slick, and was making it extremely hard to stay in control when she moaned as she was and clenching around his finger.

Sophie pushed against his hand, making a flame of desire churn from her abdomen to spiral out, tingling up and down her spine to make her eyes roll back and her toes curl in ecstasy. He backed it out little by little, and then quickly returned it to her now slick entrance with a swift thrust of his wrist, making her arch her back again. Howl started to repeat the action; with each thrust into her body he quickened the pace.

Sophie moaned then put the back of her right hand across her mouth to try and stop the many noises that were escaping her. She did not want Markle walking in, confused from all the sounds coming from her room.

"Don't stop them now, my dear," Howl purred into her ear. He traced the outer shell with his tongue at the same moment he thrust his finger into her with extra force making her gasp and strain her hips towards him, wanting but not knowing what exactly she asked for, "I love the noises you make…"

Sophie blushed and looked up at him. A smile was stretched across his face, his blue eyes showing with warmth, happiness, and lust. She started to return the smile but Howl lowered his head to her breast again, and started to suckle the still excited nipple making her face light up in pleasure.

The pleasurable assault on her body made her breath hitch more and more in the back of her throat and her skin turn red in her exertion for something that was still was not sure about. Then the pit of her stomach started to get tighter and tighter, her skin began to tingle with the many shivers pulsing through her, and she could not take anymore of it. She gave into the many emotions, and sensations, and feelings, and-

Sophie could not think any longer. Her body was taking over and her mind had gone numb to all thought as a bright light flashed before her eyes. Her back arched towards her source of pleasure and screamed.

She fell upon the pillows in a heap of sweat slicked skin; her breathing and thoughts tried to return to her as she fought to open her eyes.

"Oh Sophie…" Howl moaned.

Sophie opened her eyes and smiled up at the man she loved, satisfaction spilling from her eyes and smile. "That…was…wonderful…" She breathlessly gasped out.

"Good…because there is something better to come." Howl said, a smile forming on his own lips.

Sophie's eyes grew in innocence. "There's more?" She asked in disbelief.

"Yes my dear…and it's just about to begin…" Howl whispered against her lips. He flicked his tongue into her mouth, making them open more for him. She lazily trailed her hands up his back to slide into his hair. Then her right hand left the soft strands to trace his back once again, but did not stop at the top of his evening pants. Instead, the slid to the front and tugged swiftly on the string keeping the pants tight on his hips.

Howl's breath hissed through his teeth again as he tried to control his body. "Sophie…" He moaned.

"Yes?" She answered innocently.

"You are making me very close to-" Howl began to say but just at that moment Sophie's soft little hand had slipped into the fabric to tease the skin just beneath the band around his waist. "Ah…" He sighed blissfully. But as her hand slid lower he caught her wrist and put it to rest against her stomach. He then got up and turned around to look at the woman lying in the lamp light, her skin radiating its own light. He smiled, "How do I deserve you?"

"By staying with me and gazing at me like a person not like a piece of pie you are about to devour." Sophie said a blush splashed across her face, spreading down her neck to slowly fade out on her chest.

"You are much better for me than pie my dear…" Howl answered smiling. He then brought his thumbs into the band of his evening pants and tugged them down his hips. They pooled around his ankles, and then he slowly crawled towards Sophie again.

Sophie drank in every detail of him as he slid across the mattress to once again lean over her. How his muscles ripples under his skin in his arms, chest, and thighs as he moved, how smooth his back felt against her exploring palms. But the organ between his legs caught her interest the most; it seemed hung as if in pain.

"Howl…?" Sophie began to ask.

"Do not worry Sophie. It will be all right." Howl assured her.

Sophie looked into his blue eyes and forgot all train of thought. His lips descended onto hers again as his now naked body pressed her fully into the mattress. They both moaned as skin slid against skin, her hair tickling his arms, his smell drugging her mind.

Howl settled himself between her thighs again and poised himself above her. He slowly brought his hips down to slowly enter his manhood into her slick entrance. Sophie sighed and arched towards him. He still kept a steady slow pace into her tight tunnel, trying to control his body's urge to drive into her and to control the amount of pain on her. But her thrashing and bucking her hips towards him was making it very difficult, then she started to stop and her body started to also tense.

"Sophie you must relax honey, it will hurt more if you do not…" Howl gasped out. Then he stopped as he met a resistance and looked up to the brown pools that he loved so much. Her eyes were full of fear and pleasure, pain now flickered across, but love shone through her eyes the most…that was the emotion in her eyes the whole time! Love! She loved him the entire time she was here! The thought made Howl lose control of his body for only a moment, and only a moment it needed. His hips bucked into hers, making a cry of pain wretch from Sophie's throat and tears spring into her eyes. "Sophie! Oh my God! I am so sorry, honey!" Howl moved back instinctively but stopped short when a gasp ushered from the woman beneath him.

Her eyes were now shining, and through the kept at bay tears, pleasure was apparent.

"Howl…" Sophie moaned, her body arching up to his again; her actions telling him to do the action again.

He pushed his hips into hers again, and then slowly slid his way almost out. Then repeated it again, and again, oh and again. Each thrust rewarding him with a gasp from his love beneath him, and each new noise of delight escaping her, made him drive into her faster…and harder…and faster…and harder.

Sophie wrapped her lags around his hips again, the action receiving a moan from both lovers; her nails dug into his back, his teeth nipped at her collar bone. Her stomach started to tighten again, but the intensity much greater than before. The rubbing of their skin, the feel of him above her, his weight pushing her into the bed more and more with each thrust of his hips, everything made this experience much greater than the couple minutes before this. But maybe it had something to do with his manhood in her, filling her so completely; she did not know where she began he end.

"Howl!" Sophie moaned as he started to lick the shell of her ear. A moan escaped her again when he grabbed her hips in his hands and started to pump harder into her, the bed creaking beneath them. Her skin started to tingle once again, and knew that she was about to be swept away with Howl's tide of love. Her eyes flew open as she started to see lights bouncing around her vision. "Howl!" Sophie screamed.

Howl ground his teeth in trying to keep control. She was close but he could not handle anymore of this torture! Her slick tunnel was getting tighter and tighter around him, urging him to give in, but he wanted her to reach her peak at the same time she did. Then her walls started to tremble around him, she started to clench him tighter, she started to scream in bliss, and he could not keep it back any longer. He drove into her one, twice, thrice…then they floated.

Sophie's body tensed around Howl even tighter, milking him of his very life; just as Howl thrusted into her, his back taunt beneath her fingertips Stars shot across their closed eyelids, shivers coursed through every cell in their being, pleasure singed from every point of contact with each other. Then they slowly began their tumble back down to the feather bed.

Sophie lay there for moments…minutes…hours…could have been days, she did not care. She was with Howl that was all that ever mattered to her. She sighed and opened her eyes. She brought her heavy right hand off of his back and started to comb it through his tousled hair. His even breathing told her that she would not wake him from her exploring, but she was restricted from her need of sleep also.

She brought her hand up to her mouth as a yawned escaped her. She laid her hand onto Howl's shoulder then allowed her body to rest, and let her mind dream of stars and clouds…knowing she would be able to visit them again soon.

-:-THE END-:-

YEAH! It is finished! Please comment! Flames are most welcome! I am also very sorry it took so long lol but it is a really long one so I think you should be nice to me lol please PLEASE PLEASE! Review! I will reply back I promise! Oh and if you read this and try to tell me you like it but do not like lemons, DO NOT REPLY! YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE READ IT THEN HUH? I put in the summary that it is a lemon so read it before you read it! Thank you to all my fans! And again, please review!

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