Disclaimer: Look at any chapter before this one

A.N: Yeah, I know, I know, I'm horrible. But I will be the first to admit that my timing in starting to post the story sucked, since I knew I would be incredibly busy the following few months. I had hoped (and still hope) that I will have MUCH more time after the 11th of July, but I'm not making any promises. You know what they say: if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans for tomorrow.

Anyway, here's the update (finally!). It's bad though (worse than usual I mean), because I'm so out of practice by now... I hope to get back in the rhythm soon though.

Another BIG thanks for those who added this story to their fav lists and story alerts… It makes me so happy. Not as happy as reviews of course xD. So a HUGE thanks to the reviewers xD

To Kajia: thanks for a review, and yes, Greta is an OC. She's just a shadow of Ed's past by now, however, so she's not that important.

--

Chapter 5

Edward was almost feverishly looking from Alfons to Greta and then back again, trying to see something, anything that could prove that they were imposters. How could he? How could Alfons lead him into this trap? And Greta… This just couldn't be true…

"Idiot boy, this will teach you to be more careful about whom to trust!" Elkhart laughed somewhere behind his back, but Edward didn't care about her at all. At that moment, all he could do was shake his head in denial and stumble backwards as Greta stepped towards him while Alfons moved somewhere to the side.

"Edward…" Greta started, but didn't have a chance to finish.

"Stay away!" Edward shouted, not letting his supposed friend speak, but she just continued on, making him step even further backwards.

"Edward… We're sorry" she said, finally stopping at the very edge of the huge array, her left foot passing the first line. Noticing this Edward looked at his own feet and was startled to see that he had stumbled into the centre of the array. In fear of triggering something without even intending to, Edward was about to hurry back towards the edge when…

"Now!" Alfons' voice carried from somewhere behind Edward, but the young alchemist did not have the time to look at his best friend-turned-traitor before his attention was captured by some kind of movement above him.

He looked up just in time to see Envy's jaws closing, and then a wave of blood rushing towards him. Surprisingly, most of the blood missed him, falling, instead, on the array's lines around him. There was a millisecond of terrifying silence, and then blood seemed too seep into the array, the white lines becoming red, and finally red light seemed to explode from where Edward was standing, mercilessly flying towards Edward's friends and foes alike.

--

"Shit!" Edwin exclaimed in a whisper as he once again woke from his dreams drenched in sweat and shivering in terror. "Goddamn nightmares!"

Edwin knew it was only natural of him to have nightmares. His inner psychiatrist even supplied him with reasons: the trauma was still fresh on his mind. Moreover, he didn't really have time to deal with the events in daytime, so his subconscious brought them out in his dreams.

The nightmares were all to be expected. It didn't mean he had to like them.

A couple of months have already passed since his latest meeting with Truth, and the nightmares had slowly lessened in frequency. The impact they had on him seemed to begin to diminish as well, at least as much as it was possible. However, ever since he met up with his father, they were back in full force, and not surprisingly, usually they depicted his father's death.

Because of this, Edwin found he tended to become unfocused from time to time, not to mention that he was constantly tired. However, it was one thing to get lost in your thoughts when you were traveling from one town to another and entirely different when you had to think of ways to get someone's memory back. He just didn't have time for them anymore.

Edwin exhaled loudly and sat up. It was the irony of his life, he thought, that he was doing his best to make a woman remember, when sometimes, all he wanted to do was forget.

--

To make matters worse, things weren't going so well with Karin. They tried everything they could with her – from walking her around the town, to finding out where her accident happened and leading her there. It seemed that whatever was blocking her memory just didn't want to let go.

"Maybe I'm not really who you think I am?" the woman asked sadly on the evening of the second day of their attempts to restore her memory. They were sitting in the dining room of the hotel where all three of them now stayed. Edwin shook his head.

"You are" he answered without a shadow of doubt. She really was – Ed just couldn't have mistaken her for anyone else, and there weren't that many people running around with lost memory. This was the same Karin that Majhal loved so many years ago, but Edwin was still worried.

It's already been two weeks since he had left his childhood home, and he was getting anxious. He was worried about Edward's and Alphonse's reaction to their mother's illness. And he was even more worried about his mother's health. It was time he and his father went back, but they couldn't leave until this matter was dealt with.

But Edwin had no idea how to deal with it, and he was beginning to feel desperate. Karin's lost memory aside, there was no guarantee that Majhal's reaction to her reappearance would be any different from the past/future.

"I think I shall retire for the night" Karin said silently and got up. It was apparent in her voice that the initial happiness about someone knowing about her past was wearing off. After she bid them goodnight and disappeared behind the door leaving Edwin and his father alone, the younger of the two groaned and buried his face in his hands.

"Didn't expect it to be this hard?" He heard his father ask in a carefully neutral voice.

"It's not like that" Edwin mumbled into his palms. "It's not like I expected this to go easy. It's just that I guess I didn't expect this to not go anywhere at all… I know what went wrong the last time, and I even know why. I just have no idea how to make those reasons disappear."

"Maybe you don't have to?" Hoenheim asked, and Edwin raised his head to look at him, confused. "I don't think it's too early to say that, at the very least, you have already saved that girl's you told me about sister. That's at least one part of the story that's already better. Maybe you're not supposed to try and save everyone? Maybe Majhal's and Karin's story is not supposed to have a good ending? You're not a God, Edward; don't try to bite off more than you can swallow."

But Edwin just shook his head.

"I might not be a God, but Truth is pretty damn close to one. If it sent me back and said I could save people, then that's what I'm supposed to do."

"And I'm not saying you're not" Hoenheim continued gently. "I'm just saying that you might not be supposed to save everyone. That you might have to make some extremely hard choices, and accept that you can't change everything. That way, if you fail to do something…"

"I can't fail. If I do, it means I'm not good enough for this." Edwin interrupted suddenly.

"No, it just means you're human" Hoenheim corrected, but Edwin just stubbornly shook his head. The older Alchemist sighed and seemed to contemplate for a few moments whether he should continue to argue or not, but seemed to decide against it.

"Anyway" he spoke again, after a few moments of silence. "I think tomorrow we should take Karin to meet with Majhal."

"What?" Edwin exclaimed, surprised.

"Think about it" the Light Alchemist explained "At the pace it's going, Karin's not getting her memory back any time soon. And the only thing from her past that we haven't exposed her to yet is Majhal himself."

Edwin frowned, far from convinced, so Hoenheim tried to explain his reasoning.

"If I'm not mistaken, then this time around he should be more inclined to believe in us and accept Karin. Last time… It wasn't only that Karin was older and less beautiful that made Majhal reject her. It was the fact that by accepting her he would have to accept the fact that he had killed for no apparent reason. Moreover, there has been a little bit less time for thoughts about her resurrection to twist his mind so much. The Majhal that I've met so many years ago was not a bad person. He did become an alchemist to help people."

"And at the very least, we will still be there to deal with the consequences."

--

Just like that, tomorrow morning the three of them could be seen heading towards Majhal's home. The townsfolk have already gotten used to them roaming around the town, however, that morning they still turned to look at them as if sensing that something unusual was about to happen.

"So this Majhal is the person that I used to love, is that right?" Karin asked, slightly out of breath as she followed them.

"Yes." Edwin replied quickly, since they have already told her that a few times.

"But why are we going to him now? I still don't remember anything!" she argued, trying to understand, but instead of answering her, the two of them stopped and Hoenheim gestured forward.

"We're here" he said, and moved to knock on the door while Karin stepped behind the two of them, as if to hide. The door was soon opened and Majhal appeared in the doorway.

"Ah, it's you again Hoenheim." He mumbled, looking far from pleased. "And what's this, you brought some friends with you?" the alchemist asked, but before Edwin's father could answer, a loud thud interrupted him. Edwin almost sighed because of the cliché as he turned back to see that Karin had fainted.

"Oh my." Majhal exclaimed, quickly moving to her side. "Is she ill? Get her inside, I should look at her."

--

After the woman was safely taken inside and lying on sofa, the two blond alchemists almost forgot how to breathe when Majhal knelt down beside her to check what was wrong with her.

"Do you know why she fainted? Does she have some kind of condition?" Majhal was asking as he was checking her forehead.

"I don't think it's something to worry about too much" Hoenheim answered a bit awkwardly.

"Why did you bring her here?" Majhal asked as he was still examining her. "She's not from this town, is she? I would know if she were… And yet…" He stopped to stare at her face "And yet she looks so familiar. Almost like… like Karin." His eyes widened as he turned to stare at Hoenheim now.

"She looks just like Karin! Only older. What did you do? You talked on and on about how dangerous human transmutation is and yet you did it yourself?!" Suddenly, the furious man was up on his feet and grabbed Hoenheim by his collar. "How dare you? What did you do? Why did she faint? What did you do wrong?!" He was shaking the Light Alchemist by then, and Edwin realized he must intervene.

"Stop that!" he shouted and hurriedly plied Majhal's fingers from his father's collar. After being freed, his father gasped to regain his breath.

"Don't make assumptions about things you don't understand." Edwin continued, since his father was in no condition to. "Look at her! She's not a result of some… some transmutation! She's a real person. The same one that you knew all those years ago! She didn't die in that accident; she just lost her memory and didn't know where to go."

"Who the hell are you?" Majhal asked, his anger redirected at him now. "What would you know about Karin and her accident?"

"I know enough to understand that she fainted just now most likely because she regained her memories! Do you want her to wake up and hear you calling her a transmutation? Didn't you love her?" Edwin tried to convince. Majhal stepped, back and looked towards the woman lying on the sofa again.

"But…She died, she must have." He whispered, but his voice lacked conviction "Because I've searched, and searched and searched… But I could never find her! She must have died." He mumbled, as if afraid to believe.

"She's alive, you've made a mistake." Edwin answered him, and Hoenheim glanced at him sharply to be careful about what he said. "Do not make another one by trying to resurrect a person that isn't dead."

As if by a script, Karin's eyelids chose that moment to flutter open, and after a few milliseconds of disorientation her eyes focused on the love from her past.

"Majhal?" she asked in a weak voice.

"Karin?" the alchemist answered back, his voice not much stronger than hers.

"I… I remember…" she started but didn't finish, her gaze becoming dazed "Where are we? Who are these people?" she said suddenly focusing on Edwin and his father, surprising them.

"She must be confused from regaining her memories. It will take her some time to sort everything out." Hoenheim contemplated out loud before turning to Majhal. The other alchemist seemed to be almost as confused as the woman was.

"Are you going to be there for her and help, or are you going to insist that she's not real?"

"I… I will help." Majhal mumbled, and sat down since he was close to following Karin's earlier example and fainting.

--

"Ha, that was much easier than I thought it would be" Edwin exclaimed loudly, reverting for a moment to his former arrogant self. His father could only watch silently as the blonde strode towards their inn, almost bouncing on his feet.

It had indeed gone much easier than either of them thought it would go. After Majhal's promise to help Karin they called a doctor, who examined the shocked pair and told them that they are perfectly alright and only need to rest and calm down a bit. After he left, he must have felt a necessity to tell everyone he met that the woman everyone thought to be dead was alive and well, since Hoenheim and his son, who left only a few minutes afterwards, were once again stared at and whispered about as they strolled through the town.

The older man, however, didn't feel as happy as he felt he should be. His yesterday's conversation with Edwin repeated itself in his head, and Hoenheim couldn't help but feel worried about his son. As much as it was a relief that everything was going well, he knew it couldn't last forever. And if Edwin were to become too sure about himself… if he ever failed… Hoenheim wasn't sure the younger man would be able to stand up again and carry on with his self appointed mission.

--

It didn't take long for them to pay their bills at the inn they had stayed in and make sure the innkeeper would inform them immediately should he hear something suspicious about Majhal's activities. In the couple of weeks they had stayed at the inn, the old man succeeded in convincing them of both his ability to keep track of everything that was going on in the town and his trustworthiness.

Of course, neither of them felt comfortable about leaving Majhal and Karin even if the alchemist didn't seem to be dangerous anymore. But at the same time they both wanted to get back home as soon as it was possible.

Still, there were mixed feelings about this homecoming. While both of them did want to see their family as soon as possible, they were unsure about what to expect.

Well, Edwin was sure they shouldn't expect a warm welcome from Edward. It felt weird, not knowing how to deal with his own (at least kind of) actions.

At least, after the recent success, Edwin finally felt sure about why he was back here. It was obviously to make things right, and he actually felt like he could do it after dealing with his first real hurdle successfully.

And yet, the nearer they were to home, the more this "I can do anything" feeling vanished. And by the time he stood in front of his house, it was dark and he felt like a kid, about to face his mother after missing his curfew. By a few weeks. Without even telling her he's going out at all.

To sum up, he didn't really feel up to it when he told his father to step aside so that his mother wouldn't be too shocked when she opened the door. Still, he took a deep breath and knocked.

Only a few moments of uncomfortable silence later they could hear steps, and soon the door opened to reveal Hoenheim Elric's wife. After she saw that it was Edwin at the door, her face lit up with a smile and she greeted him enthusiastically:

"Edwin! You're finally back! We were so worried! I was beginning to think you weren't coming back after all."

"I'm not alone" Edwin blurted out, without thinking, making his mother look at him strangely. 'Perfect, Edward, make her think you brought your imaginary friend with you' he thought and then continued embarrassed. "I brought someone with me" and he gestured to his father to come out.

For a few seconds Trisha seemed to freeze up and even forget to breathe. Then, slowly, her eyes began to water and a moment later she was already stepping into the embrace of her husband.

"Oh, Hoenheim… You're back… You're back…" she began repeating like some kind of mantra, as if trying to enchant the moment so that it wouldn't disappear. Edwin could only stand awkwardly on the side, not really knowing what to do.

Finally, Trisha let go her husband and turned to Edwin, her gaze full of gratitude.

"How did you?.. Did you go off especially to find him?" she finally asked, he voice still shaky from the shock.

"I remembered something I have heard in my travels, and thought I could give it a try." Edwin answered, still feeling awkward and bad about not telling the truth. "Shall we go inside? We should inform the boys."

The boys turned out to be in the living room, and, as usual in the evenings, studying alchemy. They were so engrossed in it that Mrs. Elric had to clap her hands to get their attention. When they finally did look up, their reactions greatly differed. Edward's face immediately clouded up after seeing his father and he froze, whereas Alphonse sprang into action and soon Edwin found his arms full of not-quite-his-younger-brother.

"Edwin-nii-chan! You're back! You've been gone so long, I missed you!" The youngest in the room exclaimed in joy. Edwin could only smile back at him.

"I missed you too, Al." he said, but then turned to look at Ed, who still hadn't moved. Al finally seemed to sense that something was not quite right, and turned to look at his brother as well.

"Ed, Edwin-nii-chan is back! Aren't you glad?" He asked, but getting no reaction from him followed his gaze to the strange man that came back with his beloved mentor.

"Alphonse, dear," Trisha started gently "This man here is your father. He has come back home."

Before Al had time to react, everyone's attention was drawn back to the elder brother, as he angrily jumped to his feet, grabbed the first book he could and quickly stomped out from the room.

"Father?" Edwin heard the bundle in his hands ask in wonder, making everyone come out from the stupor that they fell into after his brother's display. Hoenheim smiled at the little boy, and soon had Al hugging him instead of Edwin.

Edwin didn't mind. In fact, he was struggling to get his feelings under control as he gazed onto the scene he never got to see in his own childhood – his father hugging his brother while their mother shed tears of happiness. In that moment, everything seemed to be worth it. It didn't matter what kind of hardships he had to live through, or how many he would still have to live through. It was all worth it for the sake of this moment, when the most precious people in his life shared this short moment of happiness.

In fact, it didn't even really matter that he was an outsider. Speaking of himself… Edwin's gaze left the happy family and he hesitantly left the room to follow his younger self.

He knew that the younger him would react this way. He remembered how much he hated his father even before their mother's death, after which his hate only doubled. He had moved past it, however, and looking back he could admit to himself that most of that hate was none other then his feelings of hurt and abandonment. It was just so much easier to hate his father rather than admit he felt betrayed and lonely.

He found Edward, just as he expected, curled into a ball on his bed. He sat down beside him and heard a muffled "Go away!", but the boy didn't move away from his touch when Edwin put a hand on his shoulder.

'This is so not for me. I'm not that mature yet' Edwin thought to himself, frowning, but knew he had the biggest chance in convincing Edward.

"I know you're mad at him, and probably at me too, since I brought him back. And you think we're all just stupid adults who don't understand how you feel. So I won't try to convince you otherwise, even if I do understand." He finally said. "He's not a bad guy, you know. He had his reasons for leaving, and I'm sure he'll tell you in time. I just think you should give him a chance."

He boy on the bed didn't move an inch.

"You don't have to do it tonight, or even tomorrow. You have all the time in the world, he's not going anywhere." Edwin tried again, and he saw Ed relax a bit. He stayed a few more minutes in silence, before leaving his younger self to sulk alone.

When he stepped back into the living room, Trisha was nowhere to be seen and Al was sitting in his father's lap, demonstrating the little alchemy he already knew.

"She went to make tea" Hoenheim answered his questioning gaze, while all Al's concentration was focused on drawing some array or another. "And how is?.."

"You should just begin teaching Al alchemy, Ed will be too curious to stay away" Edwin tried to joke, but soon added seriously. "He'll be fine. He just needs some time."

"I'm glad" he was startled to hear his mother's voice behind him. "And then, all of us could be one big happy family." She moved to put the tray she was carrying on the table and then turned to smile Edwin, who was about to get depressed because of her statement

"You, Edwin, included. You sure look the part, and even though it had only been a couple of months, it still feels like you're part of the family."

It was happiness, relief and all kinds of other good feelings that washed over Edwin in waves after her words. He was home. He felt safe. And he will do everything to make this feeling last as long as it was possible.

--

A.N: Ok, this calls for another apology. If anyone thinks the ending of the Majhal issue was a bit anticlimactic… You're right. But it was supposed to be like that. It was difficult to decide how to deal with them. On one hand, the issue had no real impact on the plot as a whole (I don't think we'll see either Karin or Majhal again), but on the other hand, it had a huge impact on Edwin's morale…

So anyway, after deciding on such a disappointing solution, I thought I'd apologize for it by making the chapter go much further than I initially thought it would go and brought them home… But this was even more disappointing, since I feel it turned out kind of… stale. -Sigh- I hope you still managed to enjoy the chapter at least a little bit. I promise to try harder in the future.

Review please! It will make me try even harder xD